Turn Your Revenge List Into A Reward List

[Roli]

First of all let me say this post is inspired by this old thread MINDSET - A message to a friend who's overwhelmed and worried

It's by @Andy Black and it just reminded me why this forum is so fricking awesome, there are people on here like Andy who take their time to really try and help people for no other purpose than, it pleases them.

Anyway, it got me thinking about how I used to be a pretty angry young man and how any time I felt anyone slighted me, or doubted me, ripped me off, or some other perceived wrong, I would put them on a "revenge list". This list was full of people I knew that when I became successful I would rub it in their faces. I would find them and gloat, I'd use my money and influence to return their wrongs tenfold and savour their misery whilst doing so (I told you I was angry).

At some point (thankfully), I left that kind of thinking behind, by the time I discovered this forum those feelings were all but gone, there were still some residual feelings of revenge floating around in my system, however they were all finally washed away when I discovered this place. I remember the day I decided to turn my "revenge list" into a "reward list". Instead of holding onto grudges and letting them eat me up, I would instead mark all the people who'd helped me in my life so I could one day reward them with some show of my gratitude.

I know Andy's the sort of person to say, "you don't need to reward me, my reward is helping people", but that just makes me want to pay him back even more. I don't know how, or when, but one day I will do something for Andy and all the people who have shown me kindness and patience along the way. I feel like the day is coming soon, I just have to keep my head down and strive on.

So in conclusion, if you are like I was, harbouring grudges and holding onto all the negative behaviour directed your way, turn it around and start thinking about the positive people in your life, a "reward list" is so much more cognitively rewarding than a "revenge" one and the bonus is if you concentrate on the positive influences in your life, you're likely to find more people of this ilk.

Happy Easter peeps, keep grinding.

 

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[piano]

First of all let me say this post is inspired by this old thread MINDSET - A message to a friend who's overwhelmed and worried

It's by @Andy Black and it just reminded me why this forum is so fricking awesome, there are people on here like Andy who take their time to really try and help people for no other purpose than, it pleases them.

Anyway, it got me thinking about how I used to be a pretty angry young man and how any time I felt anyone slighted me, or doubted me, ripped me off, or some other perceived wrong, I would put them on a "revenge list". This list was full of people I knew that when I became successful I would rub it in their faces. I would find them and gloat, I'd use my money and influence to return their wrongs tenfold and savour their misery whilst doing so (I told you I was angry).

At some point (thankfully), I left that kind of thinking behind, by the time I discovered this forum those feelings were all but gone, there were still some residual feelings of revenge floating around in my system, however they were all finally washed away when I discovered this place. I remember the day I decided to turn my "revenge list" into a "reward list". Instead of holding onto grudges and letting them eat me up, I would instead mark all the people who'd helped me in my life so I could one day reward them with some show of my gratitude.

I know Andy's the sort of person to say, "you don't need to reward me, my reward is helping people", but that just makes me want to pay him back even more. I don't know how, or when, but one day I will do something for Andy and all the people who have shown me kindness and patience along the way. I feel like the day is coming soon, I just have to keep my head down and strive on.

So in conclusion, if you are like I was, harbouring grudges and holding onto all the negative behaviour directed your way, turn it around and start thinking about the positive people in your life, a "reward list" is so much more cognitively rewarding than a "revenge" one and the bonus is if you concentrate on the positive influences in your life, you're likely to find more people of this ilk.

Happy Easter peeps, keep grinding.

Happy Eastern man.

I actually have the same thinking, although still with a small hint of the revenge-list...
I hate it when people say that you should take a revenge-list-ish direction, hating everybody and the world.
Sure, it can work and I myself see myself using that approach occasionally when I know it's not bad for me, but using it for everything...is just not cool, at least not for me.
Everybody is different and perhaps to some the revenge-ish approach is actually healthy, but I know that it's not for me, and many other people (You included it seems?).
Haha, what did I just write? I feel like I didn't add anything substantial with this reply.