I'm 42 (43 very soon), I have 3 young children (youngest is 21 months), I run a tiny freelance business from home, working 2 days a week. I've read the first half of TMF and stopped to come and visit the forum.
My Dad is a Slowlaner, in all respects. He spent his life scrimping and saving. He's now almost 70, and he's done really well. He retired at 55 and he's spent the last 15 years pottering around doing things he loves. However, he sacrificed everything before 55 to get there. I grew up hating the 'sacrifice now, win later' mindset he tried to teach me. He repeatedly told me that sometimes in life you have to settle for second best and I always raged against it internally. He talked about the value of a "good" education and a "good" job. He loves me dearly and his advice was well meant. I got a degree and a post-grad degree. I worked a series of corporate jobs, most of which I hated. I changed jobs over and over, always looking for the next payrise, always dreaming of something bigger and never getting there, despite my enormous education. I have talent, I've just never really used it. I suppose because of my upbringing, I became a Sidewalker out of some kind of rebellion. I've done well, but I've always spent what I've earned. And a little more. I carry around 6k debt, plus our mortgage. I live in a nice house, in a nice place, have a new-ish family car, and we can afford a holiday each year. I can't complain.
In my mid-30s I realised that working for someone else earning a wage, creating a product (I'm a software engineer) that paid the directors 7-figure bonuses was something I was no longer prepared to do. I think I gave up on the whole idea of a job when I got a bonus of £256. I checked the annual accounts and the minimum bonus paid to the directors that year was 6 figures. I have never been so disgusted and disillusioned with the way the money world works as I was then. Given the hours I had spent fixing bugs and improving their product, they couldn't have insulted me any more if they had tried.
I had two children at this point and I left work knowing I'd never go back.
I then decided to set up a t-shirt printing business, which I closed down 18 months later as I hated it. I thought about app creation, and did some initial work, but it never really got me that excited. I set up a teaching website and online course. I made some money, but not a lot. Last year I set up a freelance business providing websites and hosting, because I can do it in my sleep, and I now earn pocket money that way. It's something I can tell other people I do without feeling embarrassed - but it doesn't bring in very much at all.
I've always really wanted to be a author, funny enough.
What spoke to me the most about TMF is that the author actually got rich before he wrote a book about getting rich. I have always scoffed at money "experts", wondering why the hell people BUY books from someone who clearly makes their money selling you a book about making money (I mean, come on people!!). It's the same online. There are a billion courses and websites and membership sites, all out there telling you HOW to make money, yet they are clearly making their money from YOU. Sigh.
Anyway, TMF is the most honest and refreshing thing I've read in so long. I'm never going to be a ruthless business shark - I care too much about people, quality and the planet. But I'll never be a Slowlaner either and I'm so bloody sick of the Sidewalk. I'm about to start the second half of the book, and read about the Fastlane. I'm either going to chuck it in the bin after that or maybe do something that might change things for us for good. Which will it be, I wonder?
In the meantime, I thought I'd check in and say hello
My Dad is a Slowlaner, in all respects. He spent his life scrimping and saving. He's now almost 70, and he's done really well. He retired at 55 and he's spent the last 15 years pottering around doing things he loves. However, he sacrificed everything before 55 to get there. I grew up hating the 'sacrifice now, win later' mindset he tried to teach me. He repeatedly told me that sometimes in life you have to settle for second best and I always raged against it internally. He talked about the value of a "good" education and a "good" job. He loves me dearly and his advice was well meant. I got a degree and a post-grad degree. I worked a series of corporate jobs, most of which I hated. I changed jobs over and over, always looking for the next payrise, always dreaming of something bigger and never getting there, despite my enormous education. I have talent, I've just never really used it. I suppose because of my upbringing, I became a Sidewalker out of some kind of rebellion. I've done well, but I've always spent what I've earned. And a little more. I carry around 6k debt, plus our mortgage. I live in a nice house, in a nice place, have a new-ish family car, and we can afford a holiday each year. I can't complain.
In my mid-30s I realised that working for someone else earning a wage, creating a product (I'm a software engineer) that paid the directors 7-figure bonuses was something I was no longer prepared to do. I think I gave up on the whole idea of a job when I got a bonus of £256. I checked the annual accounts and the minimum bonus paid to the directors that year was 6 figures. I have never been so disgusted and disillusioned with the way the money world works as I was then. Given the hours I had spent fixing bugs and improving their product, they couldn't have insulted me any more if they had tried.
I had two children at this point and I left work knowing I'd never go back.
I then decided to set up a t-shirt printing business, which I closed down 18 months later as I hated it. I thought about app creation, and did some initial work, but it never really got me that excited. I set up a teaching website and online course. I made some money, but not a lot. Last year I set up a freelance business providing websites and hosting, because I can do it in my sleep, and I now earn pocket money that way. It's something I can tell other people I do without feeling embarrassed - but it doesn't bring in very much at all.
I've always really wanted to be a author, funny enough.
What spoke to me the most about TMF is that the author actually got rich before he wrote a book about getting rich. I have always scoffed at money "experts", wondering why the hell people BUY books from someone who clearly makes their money selling you a book about making money (I mean, come on people!!). It's the same online. There are a billion courses and websites and membership sites, all out there telling you HOW to make money, yet they are clearly making their money from YOU. Sigh.
Anyway, TMF is the most honest and refreshing thing I've read in so long. I'm never going to be a ruthless business shark - I care too much about people, quality and the planet. But I'll never be a Slowlaner either and I'm so bloody sick of the Sidewalk. I'm about to start the second half of the book, and read about the Fastlane. I'm either going to chuck it in the bin after that or maybe do something that might change things for us for good. Which will it be, I wonder?
In the meantime, I thought I'd check in and say hello
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