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RANT Need Life Advice/Very Long Rant (Mid 30s, Live w/Parents)

Quartz

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Oct 22, 2018
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Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I've edited this for the past few hours, not sure if it is too long, or if it fits within the "Introductions" thread or not. Anyway here it is.

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).

I thought because I was older, more mature, and knew what I wanted, that pursuing medical school would not be a problem. I enrolled in a post-baccalaureate program to fulfill the science prerequisites, (I was an English major), and did OK, earning two A's and two B's. I quit because the pressure to perform well was getting to me. Because of my low GPA, I would have to do VERY well on the MCAT and my post-bacc. I would do nothing all day but study for chemistry and I just barely earned a "B-". I have super bad test anxiety, and would "freeze up" on exams, forgetting most of the things I learned. Med school is unfortunately, all about how you perform on exams.

I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.

"Millionaire Fastlane" is one of the best self help books I've ever read. I think one of the reasons why I haven't been more active in looking for a real, full time job/career was illustrated in MJ's book: the feeling of being a total slave to a job you hate, working only for a paycheck. I very much felt that way in the military, and I hated the day to day "grind", constantly looking up at the clock, wondering if I could leave, having all your free time sucked up by this job that you could honestly care less about, working with people who don't really care for you. I'm sure everyone on this forums experienced these feelings.

Ideally, I'd like to follow the principles illustrated by MJ in "Millionaire Fastlane", however, I have the Post-9/11 GI Bill, which is 3 years of tuition assistance from the US federal government. Currently, I'm applying for a second bachelors degree in computer science. Honestly, deep down, I have no idea if this is really for me. I've taken online computer science classes through Udacity, but I'm just not sure if computer science is really the field I'd like to work in. I thought about getting an MBA, but my resume and grades are shit, so none of the top programs would accept me.

What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.

Wow this is too long. I'm not sure what to do at this point. As you can tell, I'm quite lost and confused, and VERY jaded when it comes to the "working world". Can anyone identify at all with what I'm going through?

Sorry for the sob story.
 

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Johnny boy

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You could put 80,000 cash in front of me to attend a year of college and I’d laugh at you and walk away. College is dumb.

Wanna instantly be free from a 9-5?

Sell your shit and quit.

Buy a one way plane ticket to somewhere with a lot of Asians where it’s cheap to live and the dollar is strong.

Make craigslist posts offering website design and marketing consulting. Post them in metropolitan areas in America every morning for $5 a post.

Build websites for people and tell them how to grow their business.

I personally guarantee that this will make you 4,000 the first month. I’m serious. If you buy a plane ticket to somewhere and take action, I’d personally teach you for free how to do this exact business model. I’m busy growing my lawn care business but if all I wanted was to just be free and have some fun with no boss, this is what I would be doing because I know it works. I got paid a thousand dollars from a single two hour phone call. It works.

Personal guarantee: if you do this and take action and you actually do what I say and you don’t make 4,000 the first month, I’ll personally give you $1,000. That’s more than a months expenses in Thailand. I’ll pay for your whole month. This is a legally binding agreement too. I’ll sign something if you want. We can private message to work something out.

You could do that and have some balls and try something fun.

Or you could sit around and ponder “ideas” all day.

You literally have nothing to lose. I just hate watching people sit around. I’ve never met you and I’d rather throw money at you than watch you sit around. I understand if you don’t want to move to a different country, it’s just the best way to free yourself. There’s my offer.
 

IlyaATL

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Mar 26, 2019
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You could put 80,000 cash in front of me to attend a year of college and I’d laugh at you and walk away. College is dumb.

Wanna instantly be free from a 9-5?

Sell your shit and quit.

Buy a one way plane ticket to somewhere with a lot of Asians where it’s cheap to live and the dollar is strong.

Make craigslist posts offering website design and marketing consulting. Post them in metropolitan areas in America every morning for $5 a post.

Build websites for people and tell them how to grow their business.

I personally guarantee that this will make you 4,000 the first month. I’m serious. If you buy a plane ticket to somewhere and take action, I’d personally teach you for free how to do this exact business model. I’m busy growing my lawn care business but if all I wanted was to just be free and have some fun with no boss, this is what I would be doing because I know it works. I got paid a thousand dollars from a single two hour phone call. It works.

Personal guarantee: if you do this and take action and you actually do what I say and you don’t make 4,000 the first month, I’ll personally give you $1,000. That’s more than a months expenses in Thailand. I’ll pay for your whole month. This is a legally binding agreement too. I’ll sign something if you want. We can private message to work something out.

You could do that and have some balls and try something fun.

Or you could sit around and ponder “ideas” all day.

You literally have nothing to lose. I just hate watching people sit around. I’ve never met you and I’d rather throw money at you than watch you sit around. I understand if you don’t want to move to a different country, it’s just the best way to free yourself. There’s my offer.
I couldn't agree with you more, I am from Atlanta but currently reside in Pattaya, Thailand. I quit my job driving a semi over the road and came here about a month ago. And as it happens, I am now in the process of starting my web design business. For now, I am working on my first 2 paid projects which I procured through some old contacts.

I haven't posted any services on craigslist for a while. But as I remember, they had a system involving PVA's (phone-verified accounts) which prevented you from posting in multiple cities from the same account and using different IP's. Also, they do not allow prepaid debit cards. I know there is a way around this because I see people posting the same ad in multiple cities, but so far, I can't figure out how they do it.

P.S. Flying into Thailand on a one-way ticket is a bad idea. Yes, you could squeak by, but by law, you need an onward ticket and $700 or so in cash. But you can get around this by buying a $30 ticket on air asia to Kuala Lumpur ;-). I personally know about a dozen people who were detained in BKK airport and sent back for not having an onward ticket out of the country. They have become pretty strict about immigration since the Military took over in '14.
 

Bekit

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What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.
I don't think you could improve on @Johnny boy 's offer. I mean, that's as good as it gets.

But I also think you need an enormous dose of hope. It sounds like life looks really bleak to you. Everywhere you look, it's pain and misery and sorrow and bondage. At the moment, it sounds like you don't see a single avenue that awakens your passions, inflames your desire, and swells your heart with interest. And if everything is gray and uninteresting, ANY undertaking will feel like a slog.

So a book I'd recommend for you to read is Designing Your Life by Bill Burnett & Dave Evans.

They give some really good, really creative ideas and present a really effective approach for how a person who is in precisely your shoes can design a life that you love.

One of the ideas that really stood out to me is that they advise you to "catch yourself in the act of having a good time." They not only say this, they give you practical worksheets to fill out all through to book so that you can develop your understanding of yourself, what will fulfill you, and how to use that information to figure out what direction to pursue.

The premise of the book is to teach you how to apply "design thinking" to your life plan. Instead of stumbling into "just doing whatever," they show you how a designer thinks creatively, builds prototypes, and comes up with novel solutions to problems. The authors show you how to use this same sort of thinking to design your own life.

Here's a little excerpt from the book if you want to see if it might appeal to you.

Before you can do life design, you need to think like a designer. We'll explain a few simple ways to do this, but first you need to understand one really big point: Designers don't think their way forward. Designers build their way forward. What does that mean? It means you are not just going to be dreaming up a lot of fun fantasies that have no relationship to the real world—or the real you. You are going to build things (we call them prototypes), try stuff, and have a lot of fun in the process. [...]

We're going to help you think like a designer and build your future, prototype by prototype. We're going to help you approach your own life design challenges with the same kind of curiosity and the same kind of creativity that resulted in the invention of the printing press, the light bulb, and the internet. [...]

Many people operate under the dysfunctional belief that they just need to find out what they are passionate about. Once they know their passion, everything else will somehow magically fall into place. We hate this idea for one very good reason: most people don't know their passion. [...] 80 percent of people of all ages don't really know what they are passionate about. So conversations with career counselors often go like this:

Career counselor: "What are you passionate about?
Job seeker: "I don't know."
Career counselor: "Well, come back when you figure it out."

[...]

A well-designed life is a life that makes sense. It's a life in which who you are, what you believe, and what you do all line up together. When you have a well-designed life and someone asks you, "How's it going?" you have an answer. You can tell that person that your life is going well, and you can tell how and why. A well-designed life is a marvelous portfolio of experiences, of adventures, of failures that taught you important lessons, of hardships that made you stronger and hlped you know yourself better, and of achievements and satisfactions. It's worth emphasizing that failures and hardships are a part of every life, even the well-designed ones. We're going to help you figure out what a well-designed life looks like for you. Our students and clients tell us it's fun. They also tell us that it's full of surprises.
The book makes a pretty gigantic promise, but they also fulfill it magnificently, especially if you actually work through the suggested exercises as you read the book. I would suggest that you do them as you encounter them, rather than reading the whole book and then going back to do the exercises. It makes the experience more powerful, and more like actually attending one of their live courses, where "class 2" won't be revealed until you've done the work in class 1.

One more super-practical tip:

Go outside.

A lot.

Be in the sunshine and the fresh air.

Go camping in the mountains for 3 days.

Don't bring anything entertaining...no phone, no music, no books - just be in nature for a few days. Wake up with the sun. Go to bed with the sun. Walk around. Listen to the birds. Build a dam in a stream.

It's amazing what a restorative effect this can have on you if you're in the condition you describe.

Wishing you all the very best!
 

MJ DeMarco

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Before someone wastes 2 hours writing a response, let me point out that the OP posted this yesterday and hasn't returned. While he could be receiving email notifications, I'm looking for a little bit more commitment before I waste 10 minutes of my life on a reply.
 

Rabby

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Possibly on duty at the pool right now :hilarious:

@Quartz what would make you feel content or satisfied? Can you think of anything specific, and are you sure it would have the desired effect?

I'm not an expert on your internal state, but what it sounds like is you're in a very self-critical state. You'll want to fix that so that you can enjoy entrepreneurship, or a job, or college, or whatever else. There's a way to do it too.

Here is how. First let's take a sample of your writing about yourself:

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).
Every one of us has an inner dialog that potentially says things like:
  • a total F*cking loser
  • very bad decision
  • terrible undergrad GPA
That part of your personality is in the habit of using negative, qualitative descriptions for your attributes and choices. It's as if you've allowed a prosecutor, bent on framing you for every crime he can think up, into your head. I have had, and a lot of people have had, that guy in their head. You can train him.

What you actually need there is an advocate. Any time you catch yourself making these kinds of statements, you need to stop and correct them. No, I'm not a loser, I'm good enough and there's no reason I shouldn't be happy; but I am feeling down right now and I would like to fix it. It wasn't a very bad decision, but in retrospect I don't think it's what I want to do. My GPA was 2.89, which is a quantity; to reach my current goals I'll need to work around that quantity or do x.

I can't emphasize how important this is. In a metaphysical sense, the devil is in your head. Talk it down, and take your own side in the argument. I'm on your side. Other people here are on your side. Why shouldn't you be? You can do it, you can come to your own defense, and you can be content and satisfied in whatever you choose to do. This is one actionable thing you can improve.
 

Johnny boy

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I couldn't agree with you more, I am from Atlanta but currently reside in Pattaya, Thailand. I quit my job driving a semi over the road and came here about a month ago. And as it happens, I am now in the process of starting my web design business. For now, I am working on my first 2 paid projects which I procured through some old contacts.

I haven't posted any services on craigslist for a while. But as I remember, they had a system involving PVA's (phone-verified accounts) which prevented you from posting in multiple cities from the same account and using different IP's. Also, they do not allow prepaid debit cards. I know there is a way around this because I see people posting the same ad in multiple cities, but so far, I can't figure out how they do it.

P.S. Flying into Thailand on a one-way ticket is a bad idea. Yes, you could squeak by, but by law, you need an onward ticket and $700 or so in cash. But you can get around this by buying a $30 ticket on air asia to Kuala Lumpur ;-). I personally know about a dozen people who were detained in BKK airport and sent back for not having an onward ticket out of the country. They have become pretty strict about immigration since the Military took over in '14.
You’re right about the one way flight. And I’ve posted ads as I’ve described with no problem. The same one, on my own account, in different parts of the country. I would wait a day to post each one.
 

Bekit

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You’re right about the one way flight. And I’ve posted ads as I’ve described with no problem. The same one, on my own account, in different parts of the country. I would wait a day to post each one.
Regarding the one-way flight, one way that I've handled this is to buy a fully-refundable return ticket for a date 3-4 weeks after my arrival, and then just cancel the ticket the day after I arrive in the country. The fully-refundable fare is outrageous (like $2500 instead of $600, for instance), but it's easy to do if you just put it on a credit card and then call and get it canceled before your credit card bill hits.

Edit: Just for the record, I did this because a one-way ticket was cheaper, not because I was evading legal occupancy in the country. I was there on a student visa for 8 months, but didn't want to buy my return ticket home until closer to the date I would actually come home.
 
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Quartz

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Oct 22, 2018
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Hello everyone. Hello MJ.

I first and foremost wanted to thank everyone for taking time out of their day to help me. I had to work all day today, and ran a few errands after work. As you can tell, I'm new to this forum/community, and I wasn't expecting such genuine and enthusiastic replies. I'm rather amazed at the quality, and number of responses. Once again, thank you, it means a lot to me.

@Johnny boy In regards to moving to Thailand, I think that is a much too drastic measure at this point in my life. Although I'm not doubting the honesty and legitimacy of your described venture, I really, really want to use my GI Bill benefit to peruse some type of higher education. After all, its free, or almost completely free.

I fully realize that going to college is, (although not necessarily), part of the antitheses of the fastlane ideology. This point can only be reinforced further, if one looks deeper into the recent college admissions scandal. The university/education apparatus is a very outdated system, and has evolved into a cartel: one in which has refused to adapt to the 21st century, and that all young people must pass through in order to receive a, (more or less useless), accreditation/diploma. They debt burden after graduation is not worth it.

This is something that really bothers me about my current plan. I hate to participate, (again), in the scam that is the American college corporate system, but I don't know what else to do at this point and I feel like the only thing I have going for me at this point is the GI Bill benefit. I know this is a gross generalization, but a relatively competent individual can do almost any job out there without a college degree. Sure, there are some exceptions, such as CPA, lawyer, doctor, but just about everything else can be learned "on the job" or with a bit of extra training here and there. It's truly ridiculous.

The city I work for employs 8 full time staff at their recreation center. All the full timers have been there for nearly 20 years, its one of those jobs where you leave only if you retire or die. The city just mandated that new hires to the full time positions require a

@Rabby What would make me feel content and satisfied as far as a career goes? Honestly, and I'm a bit worried to say this, but I'm not sure entrepreneurship is really something that I would like to do. It's very risky, that's what bothers me about it. There are thousands of start-ups listed on angel.co, but I'd venture to guess less than 1% of those will be financially successful. Also, I realize the silicon valley start-up scene is probably not very "fastlane worthy" at this point in time, for various reasons I won't bother discussing here.

Anyway, the rewards rewards of entrepreneurship, (working for myself, providing a service that effects many people, becoming wealthy off of my own labor while I'm relatively young, not becoming a corporate slave), are what continue to make me reconsider doing something like this.

What I want most of all in a career, is purpose and ideally the ability to work for myself. I thought about going to back to work for the government, either for the FBI or the Foreign Service. I enjoy history/politics/foreign affairs. I'd feel like I have purpose, although I'm not working for me. When I was in the military, I felt like I had purpose, mainly because the job is so highly esteemed in American society. I wasn't ashamed to tell people I was a naval officer. If I could have any job right now, I'd be a military doctor. The benefits/retention bonuses are absolutely insane, its very stable, I'd personally feel a strong sense of purpose, and its one of the very few federal jobs that you can retire filthy rich. Many military doctors retire from the service, collect their pension, than go back to work earning tons of money on the "outside". No, you're not working for yourself, but when the gig is this sweet why would you?

@Bekit Thanks for the book suggestion, I'm going to buy it :)

Well, this turned into another long rant. I greatly appreciate the help, really I do.
 

GravyBoat

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This is something that really bothers me about my current plan. I hate to participate, (again), in the scam that is the American college corporate system, but I don't know what else to do at this point and I feel like the only thing I have going for me at this point is the GI Bill benefit.
So you really REALLY want to go, but you'd hate to go at the same time?

Sounds like you're F*cked dude.

That's a sunk cost fallacy with the GI bill. Disregard it entirely.

I can tell you first hand the only way your life will change is if you take drastic measures such as moving out of your parents house (sad they let you stay there at age 33, they're obviously not pushing you along in life), moving across the country, cutting ties with old friends, etc.

You need to take MASSIVE action and have a "FTE."

You need people in your life that PUSH you rather than coddle you and want you to be stagnant and comfortable (even tho you're still not comfortable).
 

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Rabby

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@Rabby What would make me feel content and satisfied as far as a career goes? Honestly, and I'm a bit worried to say this, but I'm not sure entrepreneurship is really something that I would like to do. It's very risky, that's what bothers me about it. There are thousands of start-ups listed on angel.co, but I'd venture to guess less than 1% of those will be financially successful. Also, I realize the silicon valley start-up scene is probably not very "fastlane worthy" at this point in time, for various reasons I won't bother discussing here.

Anyway, the rewards rewards of entrepreneurship, (working for myself, providing a service that effects many people, becoming wealthy off of my own labor while I'm relatively young, not becoming a corporate slave), are what continue to make me reconsider doing something like this.

What I want most of all in a career, is purpose and ideally the ability to work for myself. I thought about going to back to work for the government, either for the FBI or the Foreign Service. I enjoy history/politics/foreign affairs. I'd feel like I have purpose, although I'm not working for me. When I was in the military, I felt like I had purpose, mainly because the job is so highly esteemed in American society. I wasn't ashamed to tell people I was a naval officer. If I could have any job right now, I'd be a military doctor. The benefits/retention bonuses are absolutely insane, its very stable, I'd personally feel a strong sense of purpose, and its one of the very few federal jobs that you can retire filthy rich. Many military doctors retire from the service, collect their pension, than go back to work earning tons of money on the "outside". No, you're not working for yourself, but when the gig is this sweet why would you?
No need to worry about saying you're not sure if entrepreneurship is for you... if it's not, do what makes you happy. Entrepreneurship is just a skill for more independent living... personally, I think even people with no ambitions for wealth should have the skills in their back pocket, because it means they don't need anyone's permission in order to support themselves. But that doesn't mean they have to live as business owners all the time. Certainly not as "bleeding edge" business "founders" like they do with startups.

You do seem to like that independence. You also like sense of purpose. If you're drawn to independence and purpose, entrepreneurship may be ok for you, despite your notion of its riskiness.

Consider that the aspect of entrepreneurship that can not be avoided is uncertainty, not risk. We simply don't know what will happen in the future. Uncertainty is different from risk. Risk is a special type of uncertainty, where one or more of the possible outcomes affect you negatively. You can control the extent to which uncertainty becomes risk:
  • simply by limiting the amount of time, energy, and money you put into a project, and therefore the loss you realize if things don't go your way.
  • by controlling for ways in which you might become liable for damages to others - for example, by buying insurance, implementing best practices, or choosing a business with low potential for harm.
  • by influencing the likelihood of positive outcomes over negative outcomes - influencing risk by making changes to the underlying uncertainty.

That said, I wouldn't try to talk you out of being a military doctor. We need military doctors. And we need former military doctors who will go back and consult with military, or train medics on field procedures, or teach new techniques to military doctors, or teach military techniques to civilian first responders. If you see yourself that way, walk that way. You can still develop skills relevant to entrepreneurship, I would think, assuming those skills interest you. Sell something online a few times a month. Read Peter Drucker and apply what you learn to military organizations. Be intra-preneurial.

Anyway, keep in mind the difference between risk and uncertainty. You're dealing with uncertainty already, and you'll probably be more comfortable if you start looking at it as mere uncertainty. It can only hurt you to the extent that you add inputs to the unknown outcome - your time, your money, maybe even your emotional investment. So consider those inputs as you decide what to do. How likely is a good outcome? How sure are you? How much does your own energy influence the likelihood of an outcome? Therefore, how much of yourself will you put into it?

I hope that helps. Good luck :)
 

Quartz

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@GravyBoat I realize going back to school is a dumb idea, but I'm not sure what else to do at this point. I don't know how to make enough money to live independently from my parents as an entrepreneur. I have no skills, (or at least ones that are marketable). My resume is very weak. Going back to school would allow me to network with more people, develop new skills, and make me more employable. I realize from an entrepreneurial perspective, this is a really dumb idea, but I'm just not sure what to do at the moment. I also appreciate your honesty given my current situation.
 

Bradley R

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I realize going back to school is a dumb idea, but I'm not sure what else to do at this point. I don't know how to make enough money to live independently from my parents as an entrepreneur. My resume is very weak. Going back to school would allow me to network with more people, develop new skills, and make me more employable.
Everything you just said are self-imposed limiting beliefs. I'm not being unsympathetic, just stating the truth cause I've been there before.

You don't know how to make enough money to live independently from your parents as an entrepreneur - neither does anybody else when they're brand new. I didn't. I'm still scraping by financially, but I took the leap, I moved out and moved far away it's been one of the best decisions I've made. You're in your comfort zone living with your parents still. Not enjoyable, but not uncomfortable enough to spur you to take the action you need to. I was there living in the for 5 years after college.

I have no skills, (or at least ones that are marketable).
Luckily, you live in the modern age of the internet, where you can acquire any set of skills you want much faster and cheaper than you could at college. Name a skill - you can find courses, books, etc. on it for next to nothing. Not to mention you can find experts to guide you on any possible subject within this forum. If you pick something specific and work at it you can become pretty damn good at it in a matter of months - can't become marketable in a matter of months at college.

I went to college for 4 years to the best program in the country at the time for Exercise Science and I learned far more actionable information and skills in that field in a few months of interning after graduation than I did studying in a classroom for 4 years.

My current skillsets are all self-acquired through self-education - I imagine is the same for the majority of people on this forum.

Going back to school would allow me to network with more people, develop new skills, and make me more employable.
In my opinion, this could not be further from the truth. I didn't meet anyone in college that I still consider a valuable contact today. People in college aren't mentally geared for entrepreneurship, so you'd be pushing yourself further away from the fastlane by hanging with slowlaners. If you want to make quality connections, get active on this forum. You think you would've gotten the same quality feedback you just

Go to meetup groups and networking events and meet people who have businesses and work for themselves already. You'd be shocked how fast you can make good connections through different meetup groups, Facebook groups, etc.

I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused
Been here too. There's no magic switch that will make you "mr. happy" overnight. It's going to take time the retrain and reframe your mind. Depression comes from living in the past. My guess is that you're living in the past because you don't have anything positive happening right now to focus on so you look to your past - hence the depression. People tend to feel the worst when there is no sense of positive progress in their lives. Humans are wired for happiness when making progress because it helps put them in the present. You may think you need to accomplish something big or meaningful asap, but I can promise you that if you start a course or pick up a good book and start learning and making progress towards something you'll automatically feel better. Then you just have to continue to build on that momentum.

The three books I would personally recommend you pick up and start reading right now are:
  • Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins
  • How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie
  • The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod

Hope this all helps. Rooting for you but you have to step back and actually be open to the feedback you're receiving from everyone. Your current ways of thinking clearly haven't been serving you well so it's time to realize that and make changes. To truly change your situation you have to be willing to step up, take responsibility, and break your current pattern. It's not easy but nothing worth doing ever is. Best of luck
 

Johnny boy

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The gi bill is worthless in my opinion. Like I said, I wouldn’t go even if I got paid.

My resume is trash.

My GPA was like a 2.6

My credit score is probably like 600.

I’m a 22 year old dropout.

I’ve got no “qualifications” at all. Doesn’t stop me.

Being an entrepreneur isn’t risky. I’ll pay for your living expenses if it doesn’t work the very first month lol. Nobody in your life besides mommy and daddy has ever offered that. Cmon just do it, I wanna see someone have some balls. You’d be on a beach making money with no boss.
 

Suzanne Bazemore

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One more super-practical tip:

Go outside.

A lot.

Be in the sunshine and the fresh air.

Go camping in the mountains for 3 days.

Don't bring anything entertaining...no phone, no music, no books - just be in nature for a few days. Wake up with the sun. Go to bed with the sun. Walk around. Listen to the birds. Build a dam in a stream.

It's amazing what a restorative effect this can have on you if you're in the condition you describe.
You are so right, @Bekit! Sometimes I crave being outside. Nature refreshes my soul.
 

Rabby

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My dad used the GI Bill to get a business degree, right after he came home from the Korean War (he was an Army medic). I think it was worth something for him. He started businesses and made himself wealthy. In his 80's he still used things he learned in the school of business. So I think you can use the GI Bill for something, and therefore it's not worthless. Its value is determined by its utility to you, for your purpose.

That said, GI Bill is just one option. You don't have to use it just because it's there. If you had to pursue every opportunity, you'd be at it forever, and you would be running in every direction at once.
 

xmartel

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Canada, eh!
@GravyBoat I realize going back to school is a dumb idea, but I'm not sure what else to do at this point.
Take Johnny boy up on his offer.

I don't know how to make enough money to live independently from my parents as an entrepreneur.
Take Johnny boy up on his offer.

I have no skills, (or at least ones that are marketable)
Take Johnny boy up on his offer.

I realize from an entrepreneurial perspective, this is a really dumb idea, but I'm just not sure what to do at the moment.
Take Johnny boy up on his offer.
 

James Klymus

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Step one: Quit calling your self a loser and beating your self up mentally. If you're saying that on a forum, I can only imagine what you tell your self in your own head.

Second: I would take @Johnny boy 's advice. Maybe not as extreme as moving to an asian country, but figure out how to help others.
 

JamesQB8

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Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I've edited this for the past few hours, not sure if it is too long, or if it fits within the "Introductions" thread or not. Anyway here it is.

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).

I thought because I was older, more mature, and knew what I wanted, that pursuing medical school would not be a problem. I enrolled in a post-baccalaureate program to fulfill the science prerequisites, (I was an English major), and did OK, earning two A's and two B's. I quit because the pressure to perform well was getting to me. Because of my low GPA, I would have to do VERY well on the MCAT and my post-bacc. I would do nothing all day but study for chemistry and I just barely earned a "B-". I have super bad test anxiety, and would "freeze up" on exams, forgetting most of the things I learned. Med school is unfortunately, all about how you perform on exams.

I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.

"Millionaire Fastlane" is one of the best self help books I've ever read. I think one of the reasons why I haven't been more active in looking for a real, full time job/career was illustrated in MJ's book: the feeling of being a total slave to a job you hate, working only for a paycheck. I very much felt that way in the military, and I hated the day to day "grind", constantly looking up at the clock, wondering if I could leave, having all your free time sucked up by this job that you could honestly care less about, working with people who don't really care for you. I'm sure everyone on this forums experienced these feelings.

Ideally, I'd like to follow the principles illustrated by MJ in "Millionaire Fastlane", however, I have the Post-9/11 GI Bill, which is 3 years of tuition assistance from the US federal government. Currently, I'm applying for a second bachelors degree in computer science. Honestly, deep down, I have no idea if this is really for me. I've taken online computer science classes through Udacity, but I'm just not sure if computer science is really the field I'd like to work in. I thought about getting an MBA, but my resume and grades are shit, so none of the top programs would accept me.

What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.

Wow this is too long. I'm not sure what to do at this point. As you can tell, I'm quite lost and confused, and VERY jaded when it comes to the "working world". Can anyone identify at all with what I'm going through?

Sorry for the sob story.
How was your experience as an officer in the US army? I was considering joining the British army as an Officer but I could see myself leaving after 4 years (min service) then being in a similar situation thinking about the next step. Versus building a business for 4 years and having the long term benefits of that.
 

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ZF Lee

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My resume is trash.
I don't even have a resume.

Yet, I'm booking my THIRD repeat client doing job posts, cover letters and resumes for different companies on Upwork...

To get the resume writing job, all I did was just improve some sample resumes I found publicly on Scribd, changed names and details, and sent them as samples.

Laugh away.

How was your experience as an officer in the US army? I was considering joining the British army as an Officer but I could see myself leaving after 4 years (min service) then being in a similar situation thinking about the next step. Versus building a business for 4 years and having the long term benefits of that.
@Spicymemer45 's in the armed forces as well. Somehow found a little time to do some copywriting. :smile:

Now to think of it, I haven't seen him around....

And I remember Dan Pena ranting in one of his vids about one of his students was on active duty, but found time to call and rope in a team to do the QLA method within a few months.
 

Kevin88660

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Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I've edited this for the past few hours, not sure if it is too long, or if it fits within the "Introductions" thread or not. Anyway here it is.

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).

I thought because I was older, more mature, and knew what I wanted, that pursuing medical school would not be a problem. I enrolled in a post-baccalaureate program to fulfill the science prerequisites, (I was an English major), and did OK, earning two A's and two B's. I quit because the pressure to perform well was getting to me. Because of my low GPA, I would have to do VERY well on the MCAT and my post-bacc. I would do nothing all day but study for chemistry and I just barely earned a "B-". I have super bad test anxiety, and would "freeze up" on exams, forgetting most of the things I learned. Med school is unfortunately, all about how you perform on exams.

I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.

"Millionaire Fastlane" is one of the best self help books I've ever read. I think one of the reasons why I haven't been more active in looking for a real, full time job/career was illustrated in MJ's book: the feeling of being a total slave to a job you hate, working only for a paycheck. I very much felt that way in the military, and I hated the day to day "grind", constantly looking up at the clock, wondering if I could leave, having all your free time sucked up by this job that you could honestly care less about, working with people who don't really care for you. I'm sure everyone on this forums experienced these feelings.

Ideally, I'd like to follow the principles illustrated by MJ in "Millionaire Fastlane", however, I have the Post-9/11 GI Bill, which is 3 years of tuition assistance from the US federal government. Currently, I'm applying for a second bachelors degree in computer science. Honestly, deep down, I have no idea if this is really for me. I've taken online computer science classes through Udacity, but I'm just not sure if computer science is really the field I'd like to work in. I thought about getting an MBA, but my resume and grades are shit, so none of the top programs would accept me.

What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.

Wow this is too long. I'm not sure what to do at this point. As you can tell, I'm quite lost and confused, and VERY jaded when it comes to the "working world". Can anyone identify at all with what I'm going through?

Sorry for the sob story.
Hi and welcome!

Well don't be too self-critical. Your story is very typical. I am near your age. I came from finance background. Lots of my peers are still shuffling papers at back office of banks, studying night class for CFA certifications and “hope” to get into the front office.

Living with parents? No big deal. You are not sitting on million dollar trust fund kid right? Here in Singapore everyone lives with their parents before they get married. A childhood friend of mine came from a poor background and made it decently rich now. As a result he bought a condominium and moved out to live his girlfriend. Moving out is a result of being successful not the cause. I don’t get the logic behind the stigma.

It seems that you are conditioned to believe in that you need some kickass certificates to succeed in life. I disagree. You need some papers to enter a trade or profession, yes absolutely right, but you need to do the cost benefit analysis to see whether its worth that financial stress, time and trauma (as you struggled with grades).

I did relatively well in school. Top High School and Decent Gpa for my Economics degree in a top University in my country. I tried to intern in the hedge fund space during my break and was not successful. Decent gpa is not enough when they take in 2-3 candidates out of 1500 applicants. After two years doing shuffling papers in banks and waiting to find an investment related job, the investment landscape changed totally. Now you need a PHD in math, physics and computing because all other discipline are irrelevant trash as investment and trading have been overwhelmingly quantitative now. This is when I said “Fuk this!”

Now I am an insurance sales rep where the legal entry level is only a diploma. I am very happy to not let my life to be held hostage by an “industry standard” where I have no control. Thousands of human analysts have been fired in the finance sector to be replaced cheap research centers. Traders are replaced by Algo. Even the middle and back office shuffling papers shit jobs which my peers despised are being replaced by low cost centers in India and Malaysia. The only guys in demand now are “quants” but I do not know when they will be out of fashion.

The lesson for me and hopefully for you is that never pin your hope on your preparation for any “professional endeavor”. That’s like devoting your time, money and love towards an “unreliable bitch”. Your computing degree is NOT going to guarantee anything.
 

ecommercewolf

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You could put 80,000 cash in front of me to attend a year of college and I’d laugh at you and walk away. College is dumb.

Wanna instantly be free from a 9-5?

Sell your shit and quit.

Buy a one way plane ticket to somewhere with a lot of Asians where it’s cheap to live and the dollar is strong.

Make craigslist posts offering website design and marketing consulting. Post them in metropolitan areas in America every morning for $5 a post.

Build websites for people and tell them how to grow their business.

I personally guarantee that this will make you 4,000 the first month. I’m serious. If you buy a plane ticket to somewhere and take action, I’d personally teach you for free how to do this exact business model. I’m busy growing my lawn care business but if all I wanted was to just be free and have some fun with no boss, this is what I would be doing because I know it works. I got paid a thousand dollars from a single two hour phone call. It works.

Personal guarantee: if you do this and take action and you actually do what I say and you don’t make 4,000 the first month, I’ll personally give you $1,000. That’s more than a months expenses in Thailand. I’ll pay for your whole month. This is a legally binding agreement too. I’ll sign something if you want. We can private message to work something out.

You could do that and have some balls and try something fun.

Or you could sit around and ponder “ideas” all day.

You literally have nothing to lose. I just hate watching people sit around. I’ve never met you and I’d rather throw money at you than watch you sit around. I understand if you don’t want to move to a different country, it’s just the best way to free yourself. There’s my offer.
I’m interested in this type of business model but don’t know where to start. Could you expand on this if you don’t mind? Would you just do the marketing and posts on Craigslist, Hire a VA to do the web design and then profit the difference?

Thanks
 

Johnny boy

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I’m interested in this type of business model but don’t know where to start. Could you expand on this if you don’t mind? Would you just do the marketing and posts on Craigslist, Hire a VA to do the web design and then profit the difference?

Thanks
No I would post on craigslist, talk to the business owners and tell them how to actually grow their business and what they need to do to achieve it, help them build a site if that’s what would help them the most, and then let them pay me a grand or two. I don’t even ask for money. I don’t say a word about cost unless they ask. All I care about is them and their business when I talk to them. They’re always happy to pay if you have good advice and want them to succeed. I’d do it myself because I enjoy it and I enjoy seeing business owners suck less and win more. I’d wake up, grab some drinks by the beach, surf a bit, ride a motorcycle around and then hike a bit, then around 2-3pm I’d contact leads and set up a time to talk over the phone and get on a call, consult them, and do any design or website work in the evening. Few hours of work, make a thousand or so, take the next day off and enjoy the sun some more. Who needs to work all day when your costs are under 2k an entire month maximum. You could work one week and do nothing else all month. I enjoy that work so I’d do it all month and save up some cash. A good way to spend a year or two or ten.

This is a good life for anyone that is content with freedom, enjoyment and a great lifestyle that they can enjoy starting next week for as long as they’d like.

I’m just building a different company because there’s different things that I want than to just be free. But for many it’s a great option.
 

SteveO

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I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.
You are your own worst enemy. Most people need to work at times. What is really stopping you from enjoying it? Only you...

Meditation would certainly help. Focus on yourself. Not from a right/wrong or good/bad direction, simply look at yourself as a person. No judging at all. In fact, you should never judge yourself. It does not serve a purpose.

Back to the work topic. Be who you want to be in all circumstances. You have a low stress job that will allow you to evaluate other options on your time. Doing your job without attitude help you. It helps your sense of being. And who knows, you may even learn some things that will help you in your business ventures.
 

ecommercewolf

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No I would post on craigslist, talk to the business owners and tell them how to actually grow their business and what they need to do to achieve it, help them build a site if that’s what would help them the most, and then let them pay me a grand or two. I don’t even ask for money. I don’t say a word about cost unless they ask. All I care about is them and their business when I talk to them. They’re always happy to pay if you have good advice and want them to succeed. I’d do it myself because I enjoy it and I enjoy seeing business owners suck less and win more. I’d wake up, grab some drinks by the beach, surf a bit, ride a motorcycle around and then hike a bit, then around 2-3pm I’d contact leads and set up a time to talk over the phone and get on a call, consult them, and do any design or website work in the evening. Few hours of work, make a thousand or so, take the next day off and enjoy the sun some more. Who needs to work all day when your costs are under 2k an entire month maximum. You could work one week and do nothing else all month. I enjoy that work so I’d do it all month and save up some cash. A good way to spend a year or two or ten.

This is a good life for anyone that is content with freedom, enjoyment and a great lifestyle that they can enjoy starting next week for as long as they’d like.

I’m just building a different company because there’s different things that I want than to just be free. But for many it’s a great option.
Ok so basically bring so much value that they're willing to pay whatever. Your life sounds amazing man.

How would you go about this if you do not have any experience designing websites and they question your credibility in the beginning?

Did you build a website that advertises the services or just through craigslist?
 

Johnny boy

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Well my life is amazing but I’m not on a beach anywhere I’m up in Washington so I don’t mean to give an impression the day above is my lifestyle. Just to be clear.

Just say whatever you want. It begins with believing you can help other business owners grow. I have very little faith in the marketing intelligence of most business owners so I’m very very confident talking to anyone about what they should do. Another reason I’m confident in talking to them is because I tell them the truth 100% of the time when it comes to how to grow. I’ve told quite a few people to not pay anyone a dime and just do a few things themselves because that’s the truth. They’ve said “I’ll pay you $500 a month to manage my Instagram” and I’ve said it’s a waste of their money to pay ANYONE to do it if they’re serious about actually growing a brand, and I fully believe it. Maybe I could call you and talk to you about what I tell people because it would take half an hour to really explain it and probably a dozen pages if I wrote it down.

It starts with the belief you can help, being completely honest and helpful and acting as a true friend, and then letting karma work itself out. I enjoy it and I honestly like spending my time giving the advice. It’s my form of charity but I get paid for it. I could give money to a cause, I could spend time at a shelter, but I give much more value to the world helping business owners, so it’s a win-win from any angle. Could some people take your advice and say “thanks” and never send money? I guess...and it’ll probably happen but usually not if they think you bring too much value to not stay in touch with. Stealing from me is expensive because you lose out on working with me again..

If you’re serious we should chat sometime. Maybe I’ll come visit your villa in Bali in January when I’m on vacation all winter haha.
 

Runum

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This is a generational thing to me that I do not understand. Mid 30's, living with parents, no direction, not happy ....

I don't think you are uncomfortable enough to change yet. Unhappy but not uncomfortable. Happiness, aside from clinical depression, is a choice.

It's much easier to whine about how much your life sucks, how bad your job is, and what you don't have rather than get out and do something about it.

Work 2-3 shit jobs at one time, share an apartment with 3-4 room mates at one time, get out and see how tough life can really be, then tell me about your sadness.

Do something to get out of your comfort zone, scare yourself, and your life will change. You really need to change your outlook on life before worrying about building a business.

Good luck on your journey.
 

Spicymemer45

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I don't even have a resume.

Yet, I'm booking my THIRD repeat client doing job posts, cover letters and resumes for different companies on Upwork...

To get the resume writing job, all I did was just improve some sample resumes I found publicly on Scribd, changed names and details, and sent them as samples.

Laugh away.


@Spicymemer45 's in the armed forces as well. Somehow found a little time to do some copywriting. :smile:

Now to think of it, I haven't seen him around....

And I remember Dan Pena ranting in one of his vids about one of his students was on active duty, but found time to call and rope in a team to do the QLA method within a few months.
I actually just got out of the army, but it's good to see you!
 

MJ DeMarco

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OP hasn't been back in weeks... looks like he got comfortable again.
 

IlyaATL

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No I would post on craigslist, talk to the business owners and tell them how to actually grow their business and what they need to do to achieve it, help them build a site if that’s what would help them the most, and then let them pay me a grand or two. I don’t even ask for money. I don’t say a word about cost unless they ask. All I care about is them and their business when I talk to them. They’re always happy to pay if you have good advice and want them to succeed. I’d do it myself because I enjoy it and I enjoy seeing business owners suck less and win more. I’d wake up, grab some drinks by the beach, surf a bit, ride a motorcycle around and then hike a bit, then around 2-3pm I’d contact leads and set up a time to talk over the phone and get on a call, consult them, and do any design or website work in the evening. Few hours of work, make a thousand or so, take the next day off and enjoy the sun some more. Who needs to work all day when your costs are under 2k an entire month maximum. You could work one week and do nothing else all month. I enjoy that work so I’d do it all month and save up some cash. A good way to spend a year or two or ten.

This is a good life for anyone that is content with freedom, enjoyment and a great lifestyle that they can enjoy starting next week for as long as they’d like.

I’m just building a different company because there’s different things that I want than to just be free. But for many it’s a great option.
Interested!

Could you expand more on it? Specifically as to how you would write those ads.

Currently in Thailand and doing web design.

Help would be appreciated. Thank you!
 

Johnny boy

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Interested!

Could you expand more on it? Specifically as to how you would write those ads.

Currently in Thailand and doing web design.

Help would be appreciated. Thank you!
Mediamousetrap.com is the site

And the posts are the most basic things ever just post something that sounds like a medium sized marketing and web design firm wrote it.
 

FierceRacoon

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@Quartz , are you interested in freedom, or just LAZY?
Johnny boy makes things look easy, but social skills as well as marketing intelligence can take years and extremely hard work to develop. Also, the idea of computer science sounds like a fantasy at this point. My advice is not to do it (I have 20 years of programming experience since age 9, and I've seen people coming out of bootcamps these days, as well as regular CS graduates.)
If you aren't predisposed to working in tech, it would take years of hard work to shift your thinking, causing you suffering, meanwhile increasingly more sophisticated software work will keep getting outsourced.

Everyone likes to follow the principles, and have everything for free. There's nothing special in wanting it; there's only something special in actually doing it. Every human being with a half-brain, who can comprehend the value of money, wants more money for less effort.

And of course you don't have business ideas, because you aren't doing much. You know nothing about entrepreneurship, so how can you be sure if it's for you. You are not sure about anything :) In terms of working with people who don't care for you, well, why should they care, if you have no passions? You are not a hot girl, as far as I can tell, you are not personable, so what value are you providing? Or are you taking value away by bringing negativity?

I'd say, go get a job. A 9-5 is very good discipline for people who can't discipline themselves. But get something that will push you, such as sales. Any kind of customer service job can be super-helpful for giving you more insight into people. Keep reading books, at least 1/month (e.g. look into Brian Tracy's "No excuses"). Have written goals, hold yourself accountable.

Meanwhile, go and experience things. Visit museums. Go to opera, ballet, theatre. Go to an amusement park and get a ride. Go to a park. Swim in a lake. Go to a bar and try talking to some women.

Stop being pathetic. Life has so much to offer! Ask other people, what they are passionate about. Go, take some yoga classes. Volunteer. That can be very powerful. Volunteer helping some sick and/or old people -- your training may also come in handy.
Perhaps then you'll realize, what a waste it is, living your life without passion.
 

Bertram

Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Oct 25, 2015
44
24
47
Maine, Arizona, Kunshan
Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I've edited this for the past few hours, not sure if it is too long, or if it fits within the "Introductions" thread or not. Anyway here it is.

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).

I thought because I was older, more mature, and knew what I wanted, that pursuing medical school would not be a problem. I enrolled in a post-baccalaureate program to fulfill the science prerequisites, (I was an English major), and did OK, earning two A's and two B's. I quit because the pressure to perform well was getting to me. Because of my low GPA, I would have to do VERY well on the MCAT and my post-bacc. I would do nothing all day but study for chemistry and I just barely earned a "B-". I have super bad test anxiety, and would "freeze up" on exams, forgetting most of the things I learned. Med school is unfortunately, all about how you perform on exams.

I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.

"Millionaire Fastlane" is one of the best self help books I've ever read. I think one of the reasons why I haven't been more active in looking for a real, full time job/career was illustrated in MJ's book: the feeling of being a total slave to a job you hate, working only for a paycheck. I very much felt that way in the military, and I hated the day to day "grind", constantly looking up at the clock, wondering if I could leave, having all your free time sucked up by this job that you could honestly care less about, working with people who don't really care for you. I'm sure everyone on this forums experienced these feelings.

Ideally, I'd like to follow the principles illustrated by MJ in "Millionaire Fastlane", however, I have the Post-9/11 GI Bill, which is 3 years of tuition assistance from the US federal government. Currently, I'm applying for a second bachelors degree in computer science. Honestly, deep down, I have no idea if this is really for me. I've taken online computer science classes through Udacity, but I'm just not sure if computer science is really the field I'd like to work in. I thought about getting an MBA, but my resume and grades are shit, so none of the top programs would accept me.

What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.

Wow this is too long. I'm not sure what to do at this point. As you can tell, I'm quite lost and confused, and VERY jaded when it comes to the "working world". Can anyone identify at all with what I'm going through?

Sorry for the sob story.
Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I've edited this for the past few hours, not sure if it is too long, or if it fits within the "Introductions" thread or not. Anyway here it is.

I'm not really sure what to do with the rest of my life. I suppose that's why I began reading "Millionaire Fastlane". I'm currently 33 and live with my parents. I hate for this to be a sob story, but I consider myself a total F*cking loser. I'm very depressed. I was an officer in the US military for 4 years than left, (honorable discharge), to pursue medical school with the Post-9/11 GI Bill. This was a very bad decision, mainly because medical school is fiercely competitive and I had a terrible undergrad GPA, (2.89).

I thought because I was older, more mature, and knew what I wanted, that pursuing medical school would not be a problem. I enrolled in a post-baccalaureate program to fulfill the science prerequisites, (I was an English major), and did OK, earning two A's and two B's. I quit because the pressure to perform well was getting to me. Because of my low GPA, I would have to do VERY well on the MCAT and my post-bacc. I would do nothing all day but study for chemistry and I just barely earned a "B-". I have super bad test anxiety, and would "freeze up" on exams, forgetting most of the things I learned. Med school is unfortunately, all about how you perform on exams.

I quit my post-bacc program in 2017. For the past two years, I've basically done nothing with my life besides work as a lifeguard at a local pool. The management there hate me because they know I don't want to be there. I do whatever they ask me to do with no attitude, I'm just not a very fun person to be around right now. I'm in a really bad place. I'll admit it: I'm lazy, unfocused and very depressed.

"Millionaire Fastlane" is one of the best self help books I've ever read. I think one of the reasons why I haven't been more active in looking for a real, full time job/career was illustrated in MJ's book: the feeling of being a total slave to a job you hate, working only for a paycheck. I very much felt that way in the military, and I hated the day to day "grind", constantly looking up at the clock, wondering if I could leave, having all your free time sucked up by this job that you could honestly care less about, working with people who don't really care for you. I'm sure everyone on this forums experienced these feelings.

Ideally, I'd like to follow the principles illustrated by MJ in "Millionaire Fastlane", however, I have the Post-9/11 GI Bill, which is 3 years of tuition assistance from the US federal government. Currently, I'm applying for a second bachelors degree in computer science. Honestly, deep down, I have no idea if this is really for me. I've taken online computer science classes through Udacity, but I'm just not sure if computer science is really the field I'd like to work in. I thought about getting an MBA, but my resume and grades are shit, so none of the top programs would accept me.

What are my passions? I honestly don't have any! I'm passionate about not spending 60+ hours at a job I don't care for, not spending hours stuck in traffic getting to my shit job, not working for a boss who I'd rather see roll over dead, eating clean, healthy, non contaminated food, staying out of debt, living in a safe community, and staying off prescription drugs that ironically deteriorate your health, rather than make it better.

I don't have any business ideas, and to be honest I'm not sure entrepreneurship is for me either. So why am I here? Because I love the idea of someday being free from the slavery of a 9-5 job, a boss breathing down your neck, and working with annoying coworkers. I'm not really interested too much in being rich, but more so, being free. I understand entrepreneurship is not easy, and that at times the 9 to 5 could look better.

Wow this is too long. I'm not sure what to do at this point. As you can tell, I'm quite lost and confused, and VERY jaded when it comes to the "working world". Can anyone identify at all with what I'm going through?

Sorry for the sob story.
Please cut yourself some slack for being so uncertain. It must be incredibly unpleasant and depressing, not to mention privately terrifying. You won't find your right livelihood by just guessing, That seems to be your sole reason for going to school. Time is too precious to waste on education you might never use.
It does sound like you don 't know how to find yourself.
Try Jack Canfield's Success Principles. The entreprenurial path might not match your personality style. You can develop the traits for it over time.
But for the time being your comments sound like those made by a person who is craving the sense of success.
Do you read comfortably? If not, is that getting in your way? You can get an evaluation to explore the possibility that you have an underlying learning disability. You can still get a medical degree if this is shown to be the reason why you can 't take standardized tests.
There is no timeline for you to follow which determines whether you're a great person or not. Never worry about how old you are. Some princes take a long time to grow up. Be gentle with yourself, instead of signing up for still another hard challenge to beat yourself up again and again.
Learning disability really means different learning styles. When you look for a job you will be seen as a positive addition not a marginal.
 
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