Life is getting harder for a student, what can be done?

[neonal]

I'm a master's degree student in Turkey. In my country, the school or the government don't support the researchers. We have to enter lots of exams and apply if there's an open position in somewhere but most of those positions are filled by people who know higher-ups. After my undergraduate is over, I applied to seven different institutions. I'm tired of failing. My scores are quite high. One month ago my university opened a position and I was in the first place in terms of points among those who applied for the position. Then an exam was held and I dropped to third place. Although I never expected it. The details are quite long.

What annoys me is that it just doesn't happen to me, many people face this kind of problem. People especially try to connect with political figures as they see that just studying doesn't work. I am also against it. As a result, your talent and competence are definitely not met. I feel like i waste time in vain. Although I am in the field of social sciences, I also tried to learn programming language and write my thesis with this skills. but nobody cares.

What happened to me also happens to my close friends. We are very sad, as if our efforts for years have been in vain. We dont want to pull wires.

I can't even see the motivation to finish my thesis. I do not know how I can make money or improve myself in another field after all my efforts have been wasted.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Lex DeVille]

What do you think the answer is? What do you think you should do?

 

[ZCP]

Trade your expectation for appreciation and the world changes instantly .... Tony Robbins

 

[Rabby]

All your efforts up to this point make up something. That thing might not be what you set out to do, exactly. I think most entrepreneurs, and a lot of other people, have faced this.

It can be disappointing when you realize work, money, and power are not structured the way you thought they were. But now you can see a bit more clearly, and that's the key.

You have the knowledge you've gained, the work you've done, the habits and discipline you've built. Now you've moved ahead into the darkness, so to speak, and you can see more. Put what you know, and what you've done, and what you can do to work in this newly perceived environment.

You were always working within the environment you're in right now... you just had less knowledge of it. If you're going the route of the entrepreneur, your job is always to change that environment for the better. Better for you, and hopefully better for other people like your customers, partners, or investors.

You've got a spotlight on a messy situation. Don't let that discourage you. It's just more proof that people who can make change happen are needed.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Raja]

one thing my mentor said:

If you don't like where you are, just move!

 

[neonal]

What do you think the answer is? What do you think you should do?

maybe i can follow a new path.
maybe i can endure until I finish my thesis.
maybe leaving everything behind i I can work as a low skilled labour force.

the list goes on. The problem is, whatever I do, I feel compelled to start from scratch. Frankly, it hurts not to get the reward for what I've done so far.

 

[neonal]

All your efforts up to this point make up something. That thing might not be what you set out to do, exactly. I think most entrepreneurs, and a lot of other people, have faced this.

It can be disappointing when you realize work, money, and power are not structured the way you thought they were. But now you can see a bit more clearly, and that's the key.

You have the knowledge you've gained, the work you've done, the habits and discipline you've built. Now you've moved ahead into the darkness, so to speak, and you can see more. Put what you know, and what you've done, and what you can do to work in this newly perceived environment.

You were always working within the environment you're in right now... you just had less knowledge of it. If you're going the route of the entrepreneur, your job is always to change that environment for the better. Better for you, and hopefully better for other people like your customers, partners, or investors.

You've got a spotlight on a messy situation. Don't let that discourage you. It's just more proof that people who can make change happen are needed.

Thank your for comment. the point of view is quite meaningful. but one of the most troubling situations is that only the individual seems to be responsible for the failure. classic solution: work harder, try again etc. (all work and no play makes jack a dull boy)

There are many external factors that affect the individual's failure: for example, the location of your country and the opportunities it offers. Here, I cannot see my future and I am always in an uncertainty.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Johnny boy]

Life isn't fair.

Make sure it ends up unfair in your favor.

Also, why are you in school in the first place?

 

[neonal]

Life isn't fair.

Make sure it ends up unfair in your favor.

Also, why are you in school in the first place?

Because i thought my academic skills were good. I started this road with the advice of my teachers. The private sector might have been better for me. Maybe I could improve my skills that the market is looking for.

 

[Rabby]

Thank your for comment. the point of view is quite meaningful. but one of the most troubling situations is that only the individual seems to be responsible for the failure. classic solution: work harder, try again etc. (all work and no play makes jack a dull boy)

There are many external factors that affect the individual's failure: for example, the location of your country and the opportunities it offers. Here, I cannot see my future and I am always in an uncertainty.

Yes, there are certainly places that are easier and harder to operate in. Some might be impossible, but I don't think you're in one of those.

I think failure is a poor concept. I've done lots of things that you could call 'fail,' but personally I call it 'figuring it out,' or 'learning,' or 'muddling through.' You can't fail unless you tell yourself you've failed; it's a combination of giving up and condemning your own efforts.

You said only individuals are responsible for failure. Given the definition above, you can see I agree with that. But further, only individuals are responsible for anything. Only individuals exist. Everything beyond the individual is the result of many individuals acting on their own.

So, if you find yourself as trying to overcome rules, policies, government departments, competing businesses, or monopolies, you're just using fancy words for "individuals doing their own thing." The abstraction makes it seem impossible to overcome, but the reality is that any network is a set of individual of people who:

• Act according to certain internal motivations (what they want)
• Restrain their actions according to certain external motivations (often what they don't want)
• Continue to act according to patterns and habits they have established
• Use or enforce rules, codes, laws, contracts, ethics, and morals to the extent that they believe they should, or must.

That's the system you're working within, like anyone else. Not only failure, if you choose to call it that, but success is your responsibility within this system. You can choose what you set out to do, and you can evaluate whether you've done it. And if you allow yourself to make reasonable revisions to the goal based on new information, you can continue to pursue these goals, and achieve them, and move on to bigger goals.

If the entrenched system seems overwhelming, look for smaller changes you can make now, that enable bigger changes later. For example, what if you want to get into metal refining, but your city grants a metal refining monopoly to one company? Your first step is not to take down a monopoly - there might be 100s of people working for that monopoly who don't want it taken down. Your first step is something smaller, like finding niche needs that the monopoly can't or won't fill. Or taking on part of the monopoly's work as a contractor. Or identifying sympathetic politicians and think tanks that don't want monopolies in your city, and meeting them.

Point is, your previous message sounds like you're looking at something big, which means it consists of the interests and actions of many individuals, and thinking "this is too much for me to change."

What I'm telling you is, maybe it's not too much for you to change it. A lot of people have changed a lot of things, and some people made things the way they are now. You can do that too, in discreet steps, and change things from how they are now to how they will be then.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Lex DeVille]

Because i thought my academic skills were good. I started this road with the advice of my teachers.

It's your teacher's fault life sucks and you wasted a lot of time. It's your country's fault too. The opportunity's fault. You like taking advice from others. Plucks the responsibility right out of your hands when you fail. My advice is to read the books this forum is centered around. Then decide for yourself what is the best path forward for you.

 

[alexkuzmov]

Although I am in the field of social sciences

Big ooof right there.

Unfortunately this doesnt even crack the top 10 for useful skills.
What can be done?
You just keep moving.
Finish said thesis and dive into the real world to "fail" again.
The more times you "fail", the better you get and the more you learn.

The thing is you are the only one standing in your way. You`ve imagined gate keepers that decide things for you.
Rules are more like guidelines really, not to be taken too seriously.