How do you stay motivated?

[billy]

I have read a lot of success books... EVERY ONE OF THEM says to surround yourself with people who are more successful than yourself and who want more out of their lives.

It is very hard... I mean, I guess I could tell my friends and family to leave me alone. But really... I don't want to do that.

I have tried to get my friends and family to become entrepreneurs like myself but they tel me it's not going to happen. None of them have faith and me, and for that I like to stay couped up in my basement and stick with myself.

The thing is I can't get away from them though, I don't have enough money to move out on my own, so I am stuck with my family with no faith in me.

My friends are all drunks and would rather spend their lives in a bar... Always asking me to go and I always say no. Not that I do not want to go out and have fun, it's just that I would rather work on stuff read and become more educated.

I took a year off of work to try and build enough passive income to stay at home and work but that didn't work. I ended up getting fat, and I am in the same spot as I was a year ago. I have talked to a few successful people and they have told me that I am lazy and should of been able to get something going in a year.

I am 25 now and I feel that I am not going anywhere...

I have no self-discipline, and I can't stay focused on what I am doing.

I am letting my life rule me and I am not sure how to take control. For an entire year I know I saw at least 4 hours of a computer screen each day, although some was for entertainment purposes, a lot was to learn how to build businesses, and become more successful.

But here I am 12:00AM and I have no clue what I am doing. I don't have really any income coming in. I have 20,000 sitting in a bank, and I feel like I have no skills.

I cannot seem to come home from work and work on stuff. I read a lot about entrepreneurship, but I have no clue where to go.

Also I know I am not motivated enough or aggressive enough. I want to be, but how the hell can I be when I have my parents who think I am idiot for trying, my friends who just tell me, "Well, if you ever become successful I am living in your basement, but for now I am going drinking"

The only support that I have is through this forum and a few groups I belong to. But it just isnt real enough. I know when I used to work in a bigger city I found a guy who was really motivated and we would work on stuff non - stop allllll night long and I would crawl to work the next day smiling and tired because I knew that I was moving forward. But he moved far away and so did I.

It took him less than 6 months and he taught himself programming, and built online businesses and I tried to learn it in a year and STILL CAN'T figure it out.

I am not even sure what I am good at... Sorry this is so long...

Shorten this up a bit.. How can I stay motivated, be more active, and move away from the tv? (However, I have a computer on my lap reading forums and educating myself) But, I read all of these stories of people moving forward and taking steps toward their future and I just seriously have noooooo clue what I can do... I know I need to pick my lane and stick with it. But I am not sure what lane to pick, how to pick one. I just need some help, Guidance, anything... I feel like a failure everyday that I am not doing something to progress.

 

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[naushad1289]

Wow, why do we have so many things in common? (except the fact that I am 22 years old right now). I just graduated from college two weeks ago. My five best friend, all whom I have known since I was in the third grade, are all either drunkards, druggies, or really unmotivated. I have tried heavily to drill into them the prospects of entrepreneurship, but it does not work.

I have been meaning to start my own business like six years ago and here I am six years after and I have nothing. Its all my fault. I have no one else to blame but myself. I want to get started ASAP and sometimes I just feel stuck and do not know where to start.

I also read and have read many motivational/self-help books. But it seems like I forget many of the things in the book and jsut when I need to remember and utilize the things in the book, I never seem to use it. I know I am not really answering your quesetion here as you can see I don't know the answer myself. But it seems like we both have a lot in common.

Why don't we connect with each other. Private message me and hopefully we can exchange phone nubmers and talk over the phone.

 

[Darkside]

Wow, why do we have so many things in common? (except the fact that I am 22 years old right now). I just graduated from college two weeks ago. My five best friend, all whom I have known since I was in the third grade, are all either drunkards, druggies, or really unmotivated. I have tried heavily to drill into them the prospects of entrepreneurship, but it does not work.

I have been meaning to start my own business like six years ago and here I am six years after and I have nothing. Its all my fault. I have no one else to blame but myself. I want to get started ASAP and sometimes I just feel stuck and do not know where to start.

I also read and have read many motivational/self-help books. But it seems like I forget many of the things in the book and jsut when I need to remember and utilize the things in the book, I never seem to use it. I know I am not really answering your quesetion here as you can see I don't know the answer myself. But it seems like we both have a lot in common.

Why don't we connect with each other. Private message me and hopefully we can exchange phone nubmers and talk over the phone.

Don't get down on yourself. You're only 22. You have plenty of time to start a business, so don't think about all your regrets from the past 6 years. Instead, focus on how you will become wealthy before the age of 30; it might not happen but at least it will be a goal that you can work towards.


Regarding Billy's post, I'd just like to say that surrounding yourself with like minded people doesn't mean that you should try to change the mindset of your family members and current friends. Family members are something that you're stuck with, but you can always get new friends.

Instead of hanging out with your current, unmotivated friends, you should network and develop new friendships with people who can inspire you and help you stay motivated. The kind of person that when you look at what they're doing, you feel like going out there and accomplishing your own goals.

 

[Jake]

For an entire year I know I saw at least 4 hours of a computer screen each day, although some was for entertainment purposes, a lot was to learn how to build businesses, and become more successful.

You're trying to build an online business, correct? Between your entertainment and your study time when did you actually WORK? You have no job, you have all the time in the world to FOCUS on building something but you don't. Success does not fall into your lap while you're watching videos on youtube.

Have you read MJ's book? If you have, I really recommend reading it again with the tv off. If it doesn't light a fire under your a$$ then I don't know what will. Nobody can or will tell you exactly what path to take. Find a problem or something that is inefficient. Solve the problem or do something better and or cheaper than the competition. Grow / expand the solution to millions of people.

After going back through your post it looks like you do have a job. I'll show you my daily schedule..maybe it will motivate you

6:00am wake up
6:40 breakfast
7:00 Work
5:30pm Finish work and go to the gym
6:15 Eat dinner
6:45 Work the FASTLANE until I sleep
11 or 11:30 Sleep
everyday except for Friday. Friday I finish work at 1pm and work Fastlane until I sleep

You do not need your friends and family to be involved to be successful. That's an excuse, just like people who smoke but can't quit because their friends or significant others are smokers. You have to want it and do it

 

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[Talisman]

Yeah pretty much what Jake said. If you took a year off to work on your businesses, it sounds like a generally unplanned undisciplined excuse for a year of holiday.

You're only lying to yourself.

 

[DeletedUser394]

How do I stay motivated? With attractive women, fast cars, surrounding myself with successful people. I also get up at 5:30 in the morning, to work a crappy job. If that ain't motivating, nothing is.

As for your situation. Why not just get a job, so you can move out. Working hard never killed anyone. And it will motivate you to get going on your business.

I'll write more later... got to go to work!

 

[Likwid24]

You need to pick something and stick with it. If your on the computer all the time, why don't you just learn how to build websites. They have online courses that are fairly cheap or you can pick up a few books. If you have that much free time it shouldn't be difficult.

As far as staying motivated. Think of the light at the end of the tunnel. Write down your goals. Set daily, weekly, monthly goals and post them up right next to your computer. Cross them off as you complete them and try to complete at least one fastlane task a day. You can also use images to keep you motivated. Put up pictures of a car you would like to own or your dream house or whatever it is that will you would want when you have the money. My motivation is travel. All I think about is how I want to travel the world. That gets me going!

 

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[ManWithABeard]

You do not need your friends and family to be involved to be successful. That's an excuse, just like people who smoke but can't quit because their friends or significant others are smokers. You have to want it and do it

Quoted for Truth. I agree completely with this.

Also, I believe that, as you slowly start making successes here and there, some folks may come around, but don't bank on it. Entrepreneurship scares slowlaners.

 

[mrhahn]

The key thing you're missing is focus. There was a time in my life a couple years back when I stumbled onto the world of internet marketing. I read so much and tried so many methods, but in the end I was unsuccessful. I attribute my lack of success to information overload and trying to implement the latest thing I just found. A year later, I had nothing to show for my efforts. I lacked focus.

Find your passion that you will work for. It could be financial freedom, the freedom to do what you want with your time, or to help people you care about. That is what will get you working when you are tired and feeling lazy.

Focus on one idea and only work on that idea until you really can't make it work. Don't spread yourself too thin.

You can find a lot of motivation and like-minded individuals on this forum. Make some friends here and keep each other accountable.

 

[John C.]

Billy,

You wrote quite the long question and to answer it properly would require more time and space than is available here.

For starters I would suggest you read or reread MJ's book. You mention you took a year off to try to build a passive income. That is not what MJ teaches. You work your tail off to build a business with systems and then cash out. The passive income comes about after you have a liquidation event in your business.

Some suggestions for getting started and staying motivated. In my mind the first two steps are commitment and clarity. You must commit to your own success. Start with 1) commit to being honest with yourself. 2) commit to being accountable - give up blame, excuses, rationalization and justification 3) commit to being responsible for your actions - realize you have a choice and what you choose is how your life goes 4) commit to stick with your plan long enough to see results. Results will not come overnight. As MJ says, success is a process, not an event.

Then you must gain clarity. Get clear about your goals and the path to achieve them. Get clear about why you want them. You must have a strong reason why to get you off the couch and working.

Learn to take small steps. Trying to conquer the world in six weeks will not work. Trying to move too far too fast only frustrates and overwhelms you. Set small achievable goals, hold yourself accountable.

You seem to have lots of excuses why things have not worked out. Give them up. You can have excuses or results. The two cannot co-exist. Results are what counts.

If you would like more detailed information, let me know.

 

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[zr1]

Here's what I think worked for me:

Write a 1000 benefits why I should build a business

Write a 1000 benefits why I should save money

Write a 1000 benefits why I should learn to and actively invest money

Write a 1000 benefits why building a business will fulfill my mission in life

When you know you have a strong enough why, the how's will take care of themselves.

A woman will not walk a plank to just cross a building, but a loving mother will cross a plank to save her child from a burning building. Why makes all the difference.

 

[FastNAwesome]

have read a lot of success books... EVERY ONE OF THEM says to surround yourself with people who are more successful than yourself and who want more out of their lives.

It is very hard... I mean, I guess I could tell my friends and family to leave me alone. But really... I don't want to do that.

I have tried to get my friends and family to become entrepreneurs like myself but they tel me it's not going to happen. None of them have faith and me, and for that I like to stay couped up in my basement and stick with myself.

Hi,

There's much true in that advice you read, but I think you took it a bit too literally.

Your family is your family, no need to change anything there. Don't try forcing people into becoming something they're not - ain't gonna work.

As for their dis-belief in you, simply write this thing off, say to yourself "ok, I cannot count on them to support me", and that's it. Just do you thang, and don't even talk about it anymore, so they'll have nothing to criticize.

And about friends...they are also something very valuable in life. You don't need to shut them down in order to make some new friends - if they are problematic and bring you trouble, risk or any kind of bad feelings, you may shut them down for that - you don't need negativity and problems.

But if they are cool peeps, who are just too lazy and gave up on life, you can keep them...once you get successful enough your paths will part anyway - unless you want to support them financially - I can already see it "c'mon man I need this cash to solve ...whatever... what's couple of grand for you? aren't we friends?"

Just keep doing your stuff - post was way to long to read it all, hope this helps

 

[FastNAwesome]

How do I stay motivated? With attractive women, fast cars, surrounding myself with successful people. I also get up at 5:30 in the morning, to work a crappy job. If that ain't motivating, nothing is.

Cheers to that, same things moving us

 

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[wallstreet]

1. I want to build something completely cool.

2. I want to make a lot of money doing it.

That's enough to stay motivated for me.

Disclaimer: I am a pretty simple strong willed guy by nature. Most of my friends think I'm a workaholic no fun weirdo so take my advice with a grain of salt. I'm the type of guy who actually enjoys business and crunching numbers

 

[Rcaraway1989]

All of my long time friends are also unmotivated druggies and getting started on a business was tough. So I moved away from them.

I found a place that would draw the creativity and motivation out of me. Getting started is really the hardest part, but realize that nothing beats the power of experience! Even if you start a business that completely fails, you learned plenty from the experiences you went through. You are still young with plenty of opportunity! I am 21 and started 3 months ago and have already learned more through my online business than in 3 years of college. And I am already generating a bit of income (granted, I dedicate 60+ hours a week to my business).

Billy and Naushad, if you guys would like to create a mastermind group to track you progress every week, I would be so down. Send me a private message if you guys are interested.

 

[Hokoleskwa]

It seems like you're sitting with your eyes shut tight and your fingers in your ears yelling "Help! I can't see or hear anything!" Your post is full of reasons why you can't do things, but hardly any reasons why you CAN do something. We can give you ideas about motivation, but they won't be useful until you decide you're really ready. You have to motivate yourself, first and foremost. All other motivators are secondary and rely on your own drive.

How can I stay motivated, be more active, and move away from the tv?

By approaching these things in the reverse order. There's really no magic secret here; the answer lies within the question. Use your free will and turn off the TV. Period. You cannot focus on two things at once, your brain is not built for this. If you even attempt to split your attention between your fastlane goals and something else, you're shooting yourself in the foot. Realizing your full potential requires complete focus.

Getting active is just as easy. Get up, go outside, go walk around the block. I guarantee you will feel more motivated once you start getting active. When I was fat, I got comfortable in my slowlane lifestyle. Once I started getting fit, I became restless and it led me to the fastlane.

As far as ideas go, in this case I think you might actually be closing your eyes and plugging your ears, especially if you took a year off work with no results. There are ideas everywhere, all over the internet, all over this forum. You don't have to do something completely original and of your own creation; you can take an existing successful template and make it your own. I think you missed the part of the book where MJ stresses the importance of execution over the actual idea. To paraphrase, even if you have an awful idea that you execute well, you'll still have more success than the person who has a brilliant idea but does nothing.

Real, lasting motivation comes from within. We can't give it to you.

 

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[valuegiver]

YouTube - ‪Jordan Belfort : STATES‬‏

 

[Jon123456]

I recommend doing small things to take control of your life. It sounds like you are completely out of control. You are your habits. Habits are built over time.

Go read my post here: https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/mi...irst-thing-morning-my-process.html#post165914

Its about my morning routine that I do consistently. Without doing stuff consistently, your results will be inconsistent. Add to that, I would recommend you start doing some exercise. Why not do 10 minutes every morning walking fairly fast somewhere? After the 10 minutes you can carry on if you want. Its a way to start. You don't have to go all guns blazing.

 

[Carson Yim]

It is very hard... I mean, I guess I could tell my friends and family to leave me alone. But really... I don't want to do that.

Sounds like Fear Of Success to me. You want to move towards becoming more successful in life, yet you fear moving ahead by having to change your peers which includes family & friends. Instead of focusing on what you can do for yourself then for others you are more concerned about not hurting them.

I have tried to get my friends and family to become entrepreneurs like myself but they tel me it's not going to happen. None of them have faith and me, and for that I like to stay couped up in my basement and stick with myself.

You are more concerned about changing others rather than doing a good job at becoming an example for them. Instead of facing up to their assumptions, and doing something to prove them wrong. You are hiding in your basement, reacting to their lack of faith rather than acting upon your goals.

I have no self-discipline, and I can't stay focused on what I am doing.

I am letting my life rule me and I am not sure how to take control. For an entire year I know I saw at least 4 hours of a computer screen each day, although some was for entertainment purposes, a lot was to learn how to build businesses, and become more successful.

Notice how you are fully aware that you lack self-discipline, the question is are you doing anything to resolve this? Also notice how you typed it out yourself, you alone are letting your life rule you, no one else is. True learning is when you begin to change your approach in life by applying the knowledge you just picked up, from what I can read you seem to be still doing what you did when you stopped work.

Your problem is not new,
1. You are trying to get something done outside of you when what needs the most work is what's inside of you.
2. You are reading too much, without properly digesting it and figuring how to incorporate into your life to serve you.
3. You are trying to tackle everything at once, that's why you feel overwhelmed.

Here are some solutions I can suggest,
1. You need to work on your character before anything else. Your self-discipline seems to be the kicker here.
2. It's great that we're in the Information Age now. The great tragedy is that we consume information and poop it out immediately without even applying it in our lives. Learn how to finish a book, review it again and take time to digest on how you can apply the knowledge in your life before jumping to the next one.
3. Start small, sit down and pen down everything you think is a problem now. Rearrange the top 20% that you believe are causing you the problems and work on them first.
4. Move away from the tv, just try for 5mins at first. Then progressively lengthen the time to 10-20-30mins. If you can, don't even switch it on until you've done something beneficial to your fastlane dreams.

Hope you will help yourself now.

 

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