Had a burnout last week...

[DougRMR]

I could use some perspective from more experienced fastlaners. Long story short, I was doing a million things at once since the end of 2020. Not too mention the stress has been non-stop since the end of 2019 up until last week, when my body finally broke down. I feel much better physically but emotionally, I'm depressed. Little by little it's getting better but I keep asking myself: what's the meaning of all this? Why am I doing this?

So the first thing I'm focusing on is myself. Health is first and foremost. Got my stomach back in order (I suffer from bad IBS), my sight is back to normal (needed glasses since forever), exercising a little in the morning and I'm meditating regularly again. Cleaning up my room, too. Basically, starting from scratch. It was a dark last week lol

I just HATE my life in the office, man. That's just me being honest, even though I am shifting towards being grateful I have a job in the first place. But it's unreal. A full time job doesn't even help me pay a month of expenses (it does, but I'd be living paycheck to paycheck). The reason I was doing a million things at once in the first place is because I want out of this hamster wheel. I web design on the side but I was working on getting more consistent clients (one good client would pay for monthly expenses, two a month would let me quit my job).

So here's my plan for the next month:
1) Take it easy. De-stress, hobbies, meditate, therapy, etc. If I drop dead, what's the point of everything I'm doing?
2) Socialize and focus on my relationships.
3) Get my life back in order. (clean room, clean my car, organize my shelves)
4) Save some more cash for my future investments.

I'll still do some web designing but I'm not gonna be actively trying to sell and give myself crazy deadlines. I have project that I can't drop right now but after that, I'll keep focusing on getting myself in shape. It does get better and I never lose hope. Get rich or die tryin'

Edit: I'm 25, if that makes any difference

 

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[Antifragile]

This forum and MJ's books exist precisely for this reason.
a) we've all been there (those of us who are self made)
b) this too shall pass

Chin up. I like your plan. It'll work!

 

[doster.zach]

I could use some perspective from more experienced fastlaners. Long story short, I was doing a million things at once since the end of 2020. Not too mention the stress has been non-stop since the end of 2019 up until last week, when my body finally broke down. I feel much better physically but emotionally, I'm depressed. Little by little it's getting better but I keep asking myself: what's the meaning of all this? Why am I doing this?

So the first thing I'm focusing on is myself. Health is first and foremost. Got my stomach back in order (I suffer from bad IBS), my sight is back to normal (needed glasses since forever), exercising a little in the morning and I'm meditating regularly again. Cleaning up my room, too. Basically, starting from scratch. It was a dark last week lol

I just HATE my life in the office, man. That's just me being honest, even though I am shifting towards being grateful I have a job in the first place. But it's unreal. A full time job doesn't even help me pay a month of expenses (it does, but I'd be living paycheck to paycheck). The reason I was doing a million things at once in the first place is because I want out of this hamster wheel. I web design on the side but I was working on getting more consistent clients (one good client would pay for monthly expenses, two a month would let me quit my job).

So here's my plan for the next month:
1) Take it easy. De-stress, hobbies, meditate, therapy, etc. If I drop dead, what's the point of everything I'm doing?
2) Socialize and focus on my relationships.
3) Get my life back in order. (clean room, clean my car, organize my shelves)
4) Save some more cash for my future investments.

I'll still do some web designing but I'm not gonna be actively trying to sell and give myself crazy deadlines. I have project that I can't drop right now but after that, I'll keep focusing on getting myself in shape. It does get better and I never lose hope. Get rich or die tryin'

Edit: I'm 25, if that makes any difference

Work life balance is bs, but enjoying the process is not. Try to remove things that don't add any value but keep things that add value to your day.

Know you aren't starting from scratch, the things you are doing now, you actually believe they help you now, not just doing them because you read them online in a book somewhere.

I like your plan, you'll be alright.

 

[DougRMR]

This forum and MJ's books exist precisely for this reason.
a) we've all been there (those of us who are self made)
b) this too shall pass

Chin up. I like your plan. It'll work!

Thanks for the kind words, man.

 

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[DougRMR]

Work life balance is bs, but enjoying the process is not. Try to remove things that don't add any value but keep things that add value to your day.

Know you aren't starting from scratch, the things you are doing now, you actually believe they help you now, not just doing them because you read them online in a book somewhere.

I like your plan, you'll be alright.

I wasn't enjoying the process or most of my life this past year and a half. I had moments in my life where I was working non-stop but I felt purposeful and energized. Office jobs just suck the life out of me. Thanks for the words

 

[Guyfieri5]

This forum and MJ's books exist precisely for this reason.
a) we've all been there (those of us who are self made)
b) this too shall pass

Chin up. I like your plan. It'll work!

Exactly,

Most of us were in a dark place at some point whether that was at the beginning of the journey or near the middle. Backup about 2.5 years ago and I was mid-crisis. Full-blown panic attacks almost every other day and I worked a job I absolutely hated. I was heavily drinking four nights a week, eating like crap, you get the picture. I was also in massive debt and my girlfriend (now wife) almost left me at one point after I had made an a$$ of myself drinking. I was a piece of work and I decided I had enough of being anxious and depressed all the time.

So I did the following:

• Breathing exercises followed by cold showers every morning. Meditation could do the same (getting your focus off of your depression and onto something else like being freaking cold!).
• I did my 10/5/1 goals and made sure not to hold back on the things I really wanted in life.
• Quit drinking and eating like crap and started moving every day.
• I got rid of friends who were unmotivated or brought me down.
• My father went through something similar to me so I called him almost every day for support. Mostly just to talk and get my mind off of my anxiety. So find yourself a support person when the tunnel gets especially dark.
• If I wronged someone I immediately apologized and if I had any beef with anyone I immediately dropped it.
• I began reading books again which is how I came across MJ's work. I set the bar low just to get me reading and only required of myself 10 pages a day.
• I moved and changed jobs. I can't tell you how much this did to reset my situation, this honestly did 90% of the work for me.
• I worked my new job like it was my own business and my income doubled in a little over a year.
• Paid off all of my debt and saved as much as possible.
• Dedicated 1 hour a day minimum to a creative pursuit. For me, that is writing whether it's posts like this on the forum or a book I am writing. Just do something for yourself every day.

Keep in mind that I did not decide to do all of this in one day or week. It took time to add it all but I made a point to move forward no matter what. Rome wasn't built in a day so take everything on little by little and make sure you're always moving forward, no matter how small a step you have to take some days.

Fast forward to today and my anxiety is gone, I have made tremendous progress toward my goals, and I can say that I am happy to be alive. I couldn't see it then, but life can be exciting if you let it.

Keep posting on this forum. We'd all love to see you make massive improvements this year.

Best of luck to you and keep moving forward!

 

[DougRMR]

Exactly,

Most of us were in a dark place at some point whether that was at the beginning of the journey or near the middle. Backup about 2.5 years ago and I was mid-crisis. Full-blown panic attacks almost every other day and I worked a job I absolutely hated. I was heavily drinking four nights a week, eating like crap, you get the picture. I was also in massive debt and my girlfriend (now wife) almost left me at one point after I had made an a$$ of myself drinking. I was a piece of work and I decided I had enough of being anxious and depressed all the time.

So I did the following:

• Breathing exercises followed by cold showers every morning. Meditation could do the same (getting your focus off of your depression and onto something else like being freaking cold!).
• I did my 10/5/1 goals and made sure not to hold back on the things I really wanted in life.
• Quit drinking and eating like crap and started moving every day.
• I got rid of friends who were unmotivated or brought me down.
• My father went through something similar to me so I called him almost every day for support. Mostly just to talk and get my mind off of my anxiety. So find yourself a support person when the tunnel gets especially dark.
• If I wronged someone I immediately apologized and if I had any beef with anyone I immediately dropped it.
• I began reading books again which is how I came across MJ's work. I set the bar low just to get me reading and only required of myself 10 pages a day.
• I moved and changed jobs. I can't tell you how much this did to reset my situation, this honestly did 90% of the work for me.
• I worked my new job like it was my own business and my income doubled in a little over a year.
• Paid off all of my debt and saved as much as possible.
• Dedicated 1 hour a day minimum to a creative pursuit. For me, that is writing whether it's posts like this on the forum or a book I am writing. Just do something for yourself every day.

Keep in mind that I did not decide to do all of this in one day or week. It took time to add it all but I made a point to move forward no matter what. Rome wasn't built in a day so take everything on little by little and make sure you're always moving forward, no matter how small a step you have to take some days.

Fast forward to today and my anxiety is gone, I have made tremendous progress toward my goals, and I can say that I am happy to be alive. I couldn't see it then, but life can be exciting if you let it.

Keep posting on this forum. We'd all love to see you make massive improvements this year.

Best of luck to you and keep moving forward!

Thank you so much, dude. I subscribed to online therapy and thank God also have my parents that support me. I'm doing everything little by little as well. It's funny cuz I love reading so much I read too much and that was part of my burnout. Right now I'm trying to read less and listening to more audio and podcasts. This gives me a lot of hope, it really makes me realize how much I've allowed myself to become unhappy.

 

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[JByers210]

I tend to bite off a lot more than I can chew (like most entrepreneurs) and have been going so hard since last September I forgot what it was like to have a life. Which is fine when you’re starting a new business.

Last month I went to bed at 5 A.M. finishing a new product design and woke up at 7 A.M. to train a new employee.

I walked into our warehouse and about 30 seconds in I just realized I couldn’t take any more work or stress and said out loud “I’m going to kill myself if I keep doing this - I can’t take it” and left to go back and get some sleep and figure out how what I needed to do to allow myself to have some rest and not stress 24/7.


Since then I’ve

- fired the new employee so I can slow things down and not have so much stress with another person on payroll

- limited how many products we fulfill in a week so me and my team of three can have enough time to comfortably hit deadlines even if we make less money every week/month.

- not allowed myself to work past 8:00 P.M.

Since making all these changes, I’ve been much less stressed and more productive when I do work.

There will always be a level of stress whether you’re an employee or an entrepreneur. Like most things in life - there is a balance.

I would make some adjustments to balance out your workload and how much stress you’re under.

Maybe it’s not huge drastic changes because you want to be free from a job - I’ve been there and know how bad you want out.. but enough to give you some space and time to breathe so you still are sane.

 

[Frost]

Hang in there man, it's gonna pass.

Many people (myself included) find themselves more exposed to this situation from the way they approach work, trying to go as far and fast as possible. Unfortunately, we don't have unlimited mental or physical bandwidth, which means that you will have to put hard limits on yourself based on how much work you can handle. If you have a big pile of things to do split them up into small manageable tasks, and schedule them at your own pace so you don't cross the overwhelming threshold.

2) Socialize and focus on my relationships.

This is very underrated in my opinion. Having a good social circle and good relationships is crucial to offload your daily stress and not lose yourself in the downward spiral.

Best of luck!

 

[MrE]

Keep in mind that I did not decide to do all of this in one day or week. It took time to add it all but I made a point to move forward no matter what. Rome wasn't built in a day so take everything on little by little and make sure you're always moving forward, no matter how small a step you have to take some days.

That is some darn good advice right there!! DougRMR, one step at a time. One good choice at a time. Guyfieri5, thank you for sharing your experience. Your example speaks volumes.

 

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[Metz]

I could use some perspective from more experienced fastlaners. Long story short, I was doing a million things at once since the end of 2020. Not too mention the stress has been non-stop since the end of 2019 up until last week, when my body finally broke down. I feel much better physically but emotionally, I'm depressed. Little by little it's getting better but I keep asking myself: what's the meaning of all this? Why am I doing this?

So the first thing I'm focusing on is myself. Health is first and foremost. Got my stomach back in order (I suffer from bad IBS), my sight is back to normal (needed glasses since forever), exercising a little in the morning and I'm meditating regularly again. Cleaning up my room, too. Basically, starting from scratch. It was a dark last week lol

I just HATE my life in the office, man. That's just me being honest, even though I am shifting towards being grateful I have a job in the first place. But it's unreal. A full time job doesn't even help me pay a month of expenses (it does, but I'd be living paycheck to paycheck). The reason I was doing a million things at once in the first place is because I want out of this hamster wheel. I web design on the side but I was working on getting more consistent clients (one good client would pay for monthly expenses, two a month would let me quit my job).

So here's my plan for the next month:
1) Take it easy. De-stress, hobbies, meditate, therapy, etc. If I drop dead, what's the point of everything I'm doing?
2) Socialize and focus on my relationships.
3) Get my life back in order. (clean room, clean my car, organize my shelves)
4) Save some more cash for my future investments.

I'll still do some web designing but I'm not gonna be actively trying to sell and give myself crazy deadlines. I have project that I can't drop right now but after that, I'll keep focusing on getting myself in shape. It does get better and I never lose hope. Get rich or die tryin'

Edit: I'm 25, if that makes any difference

I identify with this hard, my guy. I was in the same position back in 2018 when I was 26. Work was a slog, health was failing, depression and anxiety at an all time high. Sometimes we get so focused on the hustle that we forget the importance in pacing ourselves; while surrounding oneself with ambitious heavy-hitters, it's hard to remember that we can't just go 0 to 100 to match them in an instance, it's a gradual process that everyone ramps up to at the speed they're comfortable and able to be at.

All the other responses here are great advice and it sounds like you already have a good idea of how to get back on track. My only other observation/bit of advice is don't be afraid to start small and keep track of metrics that make sense. If you have a goal to start moving out of your job and into your own business or side gig, find the goal for what you'd need to replace your income (let's say $3K a month). The first step should be to make that first $100.. then $250.. $500.. and so on. Sometimes you can complete multiple milestones (maybe you jump from $500 to $2500 month-over-month), sometimes it might take a few months to chalk up one milestone.

As long as you're doing at least 1% better than you were before, you're golden. And if you backslide a little bit temporarily, that's okay too. The best investments are the ones that provide long-term gains; short-term dips become irrelevant.

Point being is that you should find tangible ways to measure your progress to not only validate how far you've come (which is tremendous for mental health) but to identify opportunities for growth more readily. You start noticing patterns of why certain things are working better than others or where you might be strong in one area or weak in another.

Have fun with the process. Hell, get good enough with having fun immersing yourself in the work and you'll find yourself overshooting goals because you were so sucked into it all.

And we're here for ya too. A lot of us vary from being a bit more patient and empathetic to the whole "tough love/get crackin'/no time for being sad" crowd but we all can relate. You're not alone and we wanna see you kick a$$.

AND if you ever need a buddy to talk to/vent at, send me a message. Sometimes a little validation is all we need to get running after our goals again.

 

[DougRMR]

Hey guys. Random update just to give some good news.

It's been about 5 months since my burnout/existential crisis/dark times. I almost feel like a different person and it feels like a lifetime ago, tbh.

Key things for me that helped me a lot:
1)Nutrition- eating healthy and supplements were all life changers for me.

2)Stress relief- I always try to take at the very least a half hour a day to decompress and relax. This could be breathing, cold showers, meditating, listening to music, walking outside, reading or just talking with some friends or family.

3)Small wins- I was in such a retracted and coping state that I didn't have the brain power sometimes to even socialize for extended periods of time. However, little by little I stacked up on small wins like small talk with a grocery clerk or genuinely laughing or whatever. Same with fastlane stuff, kept tabs on any win no matter how small.

Have 2 possible clients in the horizon for my web design business and am currently working on a project now. I still have a long way to go but I'm much, much, MUCH better. Thanks for the support, guys. I really appreciate it