How to Become an Over-Achiever

[Yankees338]

I've come to the conclusion that I'm an under-achiever. Everything that I've really accomplished thus far in my life has been because of gifts that I've been blessed with -- physical or mental.

I want to become an over-achiever; I just don't quite know how.

I know I need to learn to focus better and stay motivated.

I need to work more efficiently.

This is the first result I found that wasn't unrelated (like how to make your "Sim" -- from The Sims 2, I assume -- an over-achiever): How to Become an Overachiever - wikiHow

Steps

1. Always, always, always do your homework and take some extra time to study them to make sure you know exactly what you are learning.
2. Get up at a reasonable hour every morning and go to bed at a good time every night.
3. Have good manners.
4. Hang out with the people that will be a good influence.
5. Don't ever get caught up with peer pressure.
6. Keep a daily planner.
7. Be independant.

Tips

• Don't let anyone tell you that you are weird or uncool.
• Have a future set in mind.

Certainly not as specific as I'd like, but it's a start.

Any thoughts? What do YOU do to help achieve your goals?

 

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[werbl]

Good post, I struggle with that too. I carry this little notebook around with me everywhere. In the back I have a list of my long and medium-term goals. In the front of the book, I write down all of my daily tasks, kind of like an assignment notebook - visit so and so, get ___ from the store, work on my business, trading, work out, blah blah blah. After I accomplish one of the tasks, I cross it out in the notebook. It feels really good to do this! I write down every little thing I have to do. That way, I don't have to remember any of it, I'm not late for stuff, forgetting stuff. If I find myself with an hour or two to kill, I'll just open up the notebook and pick a random task to get done.

Also, check these out, they've helped me a lot...
Zen Habits | Simple Productivity
Stepcase Lifehack : Productivity, Getting Things Done and Lifehacks Blog
Dumb Little Man

 

[rzach41]

Good post, I struggle with that too. I carry this little notebook around with me everywhere. In the back I have a list of my long and medium-term goals. In the front of the book, I write down all of my daily tasks, kind of like an assignment notebook - visit so and so, get ___ from the store, work on my business, trading, work out, blah blah blah. After I accomplish one of the tasks, I cross it out in the notebook. It feels really good to do this! I write down every little thing I have to do. That way, I don't have to remember any of it, I'm not late for stuff, forgetting stuff. If I find myself with an hour or two to kill, I'll just open up the notebook and pick a random task to get done.

Also, check these out, they've helped me a lot...
Zen Habits | Simple Productivity
Stepcase Lifehack : Productivity, Getting Things Done and Lifehacks Blog
Dumb Little Man

Rep+

Great post! I use a little pocket sized notebook to write down any business thoughts/ideas that come to me throughout the day. But it makes great sense to use it for daily tasks and goals as well.

To kind of touch on what he said, tasks seem much easier to handle when they are scheduled out and in front of you in writing. If they aren't, I tend to procrastinate and feel overwhelmed-- like I don't know where to start. Try designating time for certain things. You don't have to follow it religiously, but I think you'll see that sitting down and getting started is the hardest part. Once you're committed to doing something it doesn't really feel like hard work.

R

 

[yveskleinsky]

I've come to the conclusion that I'm an under-achiever. Everything that I've really accomplished thus far in my life has been because of gifts that I've been blessed with -- physical or mental.

I know I need to learn to focus better and stay motivated.

I need to work more efficiently.

Yankees,

Of all the words I would use to describe you, "under-achiever" wouldn't even enter my mind! ...I'm curious to know why you are brushing off your accomplishments because they have been "because of gifts that you've been blessed with". What's wrong with that? We are all blessed with different strengths and weaknesses. There is nothing wrong with achieving by developing your gifts. I know sometimes only focusing on what you're good at can feel like you are lazy, because things tend to come so naturally- but I tell ya, the more successful people I meet, the more of them stick to what they are good at and outsource the rest! ...As for learning to stay motivated and focused, generally when you find something you really enjoy doing, staying motivated and focused just kinda clicks into place. If you find yourself unmotivated and unfocused, start trying new things.

Just out of curiousity, what would your ideal (super-productive) day look like? What is an average day for you now? What specifically do you think you would need to do (or become) to bridge the gap?

 

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[Yankees338]

Yankees,

Of all the words I would use to describe you, "under-achiever" wouldn't even enter my mind! ...I'm curious to know why you are brushing off your accomplishments because they have been "because of gifts that you've been blessed with". What's wrong with that? We are all blessed with different strengths and weaknesses. There is nothing wrong with achieving by developing your gifts. I know sometimes only focusing on what you're good at can feel like you are lazy, because things tend to come so naturally- but I tell ya, the more successful people I meet, the more of them stick to what they are good at and outsource the rest! ...As for learning to stay motivated and focused, generally when you find something you really enjoy doing, staying motivated and focused just kinda clicks into place. If you find yourself unmotivated and unfocused, start trying new things.

Just out of curiousity, what would your ideal (super-productive) day look like? What is an average day for you now? What specifically do you think you would need to do (or become) to bridge the gap?

Honestly, I've never really had to work for anything in my life. I had a 3.84 GPA this year as a Junior. I did maybe 30 minutes of work a week at home. The rest of my homework was either done during another class, lunch, or I just skipped the assignment. I just paid enough attention in class to grasp the information, which wasn't too hard for me.

I took all standard classes this year except for AP Economics (and only because it interested me). I was probably overqualified for all of the classes I took, but it made cruising through quite easy.

Same thing with sports. I play to have fun and because I love to play. My high school is in one of the toughest conferences for sports in the state of NJ, and I started on my teams in both baseball and basketball. All I do is go out and play. Sure, I play in the offseason or throw a ball with my friends, but I've never really had to force myself to do something to get better.

I think that's basically what I'm trying to say: I've never had to force myself to do anything. If I don't like something, I just do something else.

I'm not saying the above the brag -- just saying it because you asked. I'm also quite the tennis player, too. :hl: :smxA:

Seriously, though. I'm the epitome of an under-achiever. I want to change that, though. The time is now!

And a typical day for me has been this:

Between 10 AM and 11:30 AM: Wake up
Until 3 PM: Eat, browse the internet (wasting time), check up on the Fastlane (for an endless number of hours).
From 3:30 to 8: Baseball
From 8 PM to 11:30: Eat dinner, hang out with friends, sometimes another baseball game.
11:30 til 2 AM (or whenever I get tired): Internet -- sports, business, real estate.

My baseball season officially ended tonight, so my schedule will be different. Hopefully, I can make some progress before a week at the beach with my family in mid-August!

Edit: Now that I think about, I really don't do anything "super-productive". I need to get my shit together.

 

[michael]

Between 10 AM and 11:30 AM: Wake up
Until 3 PM: Eat, browse the internet (wasting time), check up on the Fastlane (for an endless number of hours).
From 3:30 to 8: Baseball
From 8 PM to 11:30: Eat dinner, hang out with friends, sometimes another baseball game.
11:30 til 2 AM (or whenever I get tired): Internet -- sports, business, real estate.

Great post. It really made me think, I am in much the same situation as you, I have grand goals and dreams, plan to make my millions young and generally do quite well at school without trying to hard (though this approach is beginning to let me down a little so I must try a little harder now).

I'd hardly call you an underachiever but if you are anything like me you are a night owl, tending to enjoy keeping late hours where you are most productive and sleeping in late regularly.

You mentioned what I believe to be my biggest time waster which robs most time from my day, and probably from your day too. "Browsing the internet (wasting time)". Some days I can waste most of the daylight hours reading great articles, not a complete waste of time as I am learning but these hours planning and reading would be better spent acting.

Lately I have been printing off the articles I really want to read, saves me from seeing a link...another link...another link and reading countless articles wasting my time.

You can try putting block on the internet etc but really this might not do much good. Lately I've found I just need to have a reminder of my goals around like some info for my business plan, some real estate articles printed off, some photos of some neat houses, exotic destinations, supercars etc and that really helps me to stay focussed, avoid wasting time online and get to bed early.

Really I think society as a whole often looks for the magic pill, instant solutions which will make us smarter, more accomplished, fitter, stronger, healthier, happier that we tend to forget all we need is hard work, persistence and action.

Maybe I've read you wrong but it is something I have been dealing with lately myself 'underachieving'.

Btw thankyou for those links you PM'd me earlier I'll respond to the message later on.

Have a good day Ryan!

 

[HenkHolland]

Ryan and Michael, the fact that you both (respectively 17 and 16 years old) are active on this forum already demonstrates that you definitely don't have the mentality of under-achievers. Both of you are already thinking about entering the fastlane. Don't be too hard on yourself and continue to do the "time-wasting" things that you enjoy.

When I had your age I was "wasting" most of my non-school time playing the guitar in a rock band and playing tennis. Would I have been better off if I had spent that time in a "more useful" way? Maybe financially, but not in terms of happiness. My time with the band and winning tennis tournaments have contributed greatly in making me who I am today and I'm very happy with that. I would never consider to trade in those experiences and memories for money if the option would be offered to me now.

So, play on.

 

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[fanocks2003]

I'm always aiming to be an under-achiever. Ok to the fact that you need to know stuff that might sink you otherwise, but everything else....why bother unless it get's you excited?

I don't mind others being over-achievers. I like them to do stuff for me. Someone needs to sacrifice their precious time on this earth I guess.

 

[Runum]

Hey Ryan, sorry I was off line last night. Dude, underachiever? Seriously? I'm surprised you think that, don't be so hard on yourself. You are an overachiever in my book as far as your knowledge and dreams. Your able to hold your own in any of the conversations that not many 16/17 yo's could. You have begun your website idea. You have contacted REI's with the purpose of bird dogging and learning. As far as motivation, you are normal. Most of us adults have a natural lazy streak and mile wide and an excuse list a mile long. We work everyday to overcome our shortcomings.

I am so impressed by you and all of the other teens on this board. I never had any desire to learn the things you have at your age. Enjoy what you have done so far, aspire to do better, but don't beat yourself up for being a nomal teen. Have fun and enjoy the ride!:icon_super:

 

[PAshortie]

What do YOU do to help achieve your goals?

I use visual reminders as aids to stay focused during the day, at work and at home. I realized the power of visual reminders while I was in the Air Force. I liked the fact that you could walk down the hallway, or into an office, and see pics/quotes on leadership, integrity, and productivity. It helped a lot, especially on the moody days. I’ve also learned not to beat myself up on the days that I’m unproductive. Everyone needs a break every now and then. Just make sure the break doesn’t turn into multiple days, unless on vacation of course.

I like your tips, good lessons to follow. Rep +

 

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[AroundTheWorld]

Yankees - - - I think I get what you are saying.

You don't have to work for your accomplishments - they just come to you. And.... you want to have to WORK for something. Is that right?

My suggestion is to set a very high goal. Something that lights you up. Something that you really feel a passion for. And then, put a plan in motion to get it done now!!!

Seems to me that sometimes I read your posts and it seems that you are waiting. Waiting until you are older so that you can do x, y, and z.

Why wait?

 

[mtnman]

Set a date for the site.

Reach it, no exceptions.

 

[headmic]

I know for me failing at something has always been the greatest motivation for me. I would always bounce back understanding that's not how it works, now let's try again and figure out how it does work. It's apparent you have established many future endeavors and goals, so go after them with fierce resolve. You can only plan so much.

You mention that alot comes easy to you, perhaps you should go and fail at something you want to achieve. And keep failing until you figure it out. In the end it will be the successes we'll remember you for.

Slacker? Only winners choose to roll with winners. C'mon Dude.


"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." -Michael Jordan

 

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[G_Alexander]

Yankees,

From talking with you I know that you have a business plan up your sleeve. And that is definitely something that will require you to challenge and "over-achieve". I bought about 15 website domains in the past year and I was finding it hard to want to get going on any of them.

My situation was a little different though.

SCHOOL YEAR:

7:15AM - Wake up/go to school
2:45PM - Done with school/go to work
4:00PM - Work
9:00PM - Leave Work/go home and read, browse internet, hangout with friends
1:00AM - Go to sleep

**Repeat.

SUMMER:

6:00AM - Wake up/catch train
8:00AM - Begin work at Chicago Law Firm
6:00PM - Get home/workout
1:00AM - Go to bed

**Repeat

Of course my days are filled with more detail that this, but the general point here is that I work my a$$ off right now because what else would I have to do?? Screw off with my friends? No...I do that when I don't have anything smart to do. Of course I go out and party on the weekends and have a good time. I am by no means a boring person. But I am WORKING towards my goal.

As you know from talking with me we have very similar goals. Internet/real estate.

I have been saving all of my money so that I can leverage some real estate before I am even out of college.

Now that baseball is over for you, you should look for a job for sure. Save all of your earnings in a liquid money market account. Use the cash strictly for investment purposes only (ie. buy domains, develop website/marketing, saving for real estate).

Even with my busy work schedule, I found the time to build one of my websites. The way it happened was by (as mtnman said) writing down a CONCRETE DATE for the site to be completed by. It just flowed and happened exactly the day we planned and the site only took about 3 weeks to build with hard work.

I am developing a couple more sites right now, but I feel like I have been slacking due to lack of motivation. I am organizing a meeting with my developer and a couple other guys helping with the ventures so that we set CONCRETE DATES for our new projects to be completed.

I swear, as simple as it may be, writing down your goals is an UBER efficient way to get things done.

-Alex

 

[Kung Fu Steve]

I have to agree that you have already achieved. It took me years to get in this mindset and you are already there at 17? That means you could be doing big things before you're 18. My goal was to start my business by 21. I missed it by a month... ha... Like we talked a little, if you figure out what you're passionate about, use those skills that come easy to you and abuse them to make a bunch of money :icon_super:

 

[SteveO]

I see what you mean.

I have been a bit of an accomplished runner. Not because of natural talent though. I don't look like a runner in any fashion. My lung capacity is below average. The typical runner has a low heart rate, mine is not. I have drive and desire though. In the last couple of years of my life I have turned in times of 2:53 in the marathon and 36:20 in the 10K. It is all due to hard work and desire along with the love of running.

I run with a REALLY FAST and serious running group. It is amazing to see some of this natural talent that comes through. I have found myself thinking repeatedly, "if I just had their abilities...". The thing is that I frequently outperform them. Most of them do not have the same work ethic.

I do agree with you that you have a dilemma. You need to develop a hunger for this. A hunger that drives you to succeed. You have shown the beginnings of it by being here. The followthrough is up to you.

 

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[Yankees338]

Great post. It really made me think, I am in much the same situation as you, I have grand goals and dreams, plan to make my millions young and generally do quite well at school without trying to hard (though this approach is beginning to let me down a little so I must try a little harder now).

I'd hardly call you an underachiever but if you are anything like me you are a night owl, tending to enjoy keeping late hours where you are most productive and sleeping in late regularly.

You mentioned what I believe to be my biggest time waster which robs most time from my day, and probably from your day too. "Browsing the internet (wasting time)". Some days I can waste most of the daylight hours reading great articles, not a complete waste of time as I am learning but these hours planning and reading would be better spent acting.

Lately I have been printing off the articles I really want to read, saves me from seeing a link...another link...another link and reading countless articles wasting my time.

You can try putting block on the internet etc but really this might not do much good. Lately I've found I just need to have a reminder of my goals around like some info for my business plan, some real estate articles printed off, some photos of some neat houses, exotic destinations, supercars etc and that really helps me to stay focussed, avoid wasting time online and get to bed early.

Really I think society as a whole often looks for the magic pill, instant solutions which will make us smarter, more accomplished, fitter, stronger, healthier, happier that we tend to forget all we need is hard work, persistence and action.

Maybe I've read you wrong but it is something I have been dealing with lately myself 'underachieving'.

Btw thankyou for those links you PM'd me earlier I'll respond to the message later on.

Have a good day Ryan!

You are exactly right, Michael. I just need to stay focused on one task and do it.

And you're welcome.

Hey Ryan, sorry I was off line last night. Dude, underachiever? Seriously? I'm surprised you think that, don't be so hard on yourself. You are an overachiever in my book as far as your knowledge and dreams. Your able to hold your own in any of the conversations that not many 16/17 yo's could. You have begun your website idea. You have contacted REI's with the purpose of bird dogging and learning. As far as motivation, you are normal. Most of us adults have a natural lazy streak and mile wide and an excuse list a mile long. We work everyday to overcome our shortcomings.

I am so impressed by you and all of the other teens on this board. I never had any desire to learn the things you have at your age. Enjoy what you have done so far, aspire to do better, but don't beat yourself up for being a nomal teen. Have fun and enjoy the ride!:icon_super:

Thanks, Greg. I think what it comes down to is that I know I'm capable of doing more, but I just never seem to get it done.

Yankees - - - I think I get what you are saying.

You don't have to work for your accomplishments - they just come to you. And.... you want to have to WORK for something. Is that right?

My suggestion is to set a very high goal. Something that lights you up. Something that you really feel a passion for. And then, put a plan in motion to get it done now!!!

Seems to me that sometimes I read your posts and it seems that you are waiting. Waiting until you are older so that you can do x, y, and z.

Why wait?

There's definitely some truth to that. I don't mind having everything come easily to me, but I know that it's gonna bite me in the a$$ one day. I'm gonna have to learn to work for things eventually, and the things that I really want won't just fall into my lap.

I really don't know why I put things off like I do. Am I afraid of failing? I really don't think I am, but it seems like that's the case.

I know for me failing at something has always been the greatest motivation for me. I would always bounce back understanding that's not how it works, now let's try again and figure out how it does work. It's apparent you have established many future endeavors and goals, so go after them with fierce resolve. You can only plan so much.

You mention that alot comes easy to you, perhaps you should go and fail at something you want to achieve. And keep failing until you figure it out. In the end it will be the successes we'll remember you for.

Slacker? Only winners choose to roll with winners. C'mon Dude.


"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." -Michael Jordan

Very good post, sir. Great quote, too. I know I'm on the right track here, but I just need to start putting one foot in front of the other.

Yankees,

From talking with you I know that you have a business plan up your sleeve. And that is definitely something that will require you to challenge and "over-achieve". I bought about 15 website domains in the past year and I was finding it hard to want to get going on any of them.

My situation was a little different though.

SCHOOL YEAR:

7:15AM - Wake up/go to school
2:45PM - Done with school/go to work
4:00PM - Work
9:00PM - Leave Work/go home and read, browse internet, hangout with friends
1:00AM - Go to sleep

**Repeat.

SUMMER:

6:00AM - Wake up/catch train
8:00AM - Begin work at Chicago Law Firm
6:00PM - Get home/workout
1:00AM - Go to bed

**Repeat

Of course my days are filled with more detail that this, but the general point here is that I work my a$$ off right now because what else would I have to do?? Screw off with my friends? No...I do that when I don't have anything smart to do. Of course I go out and party on the weekends and have a good time. I am by no means a boring person. But I am WORKING towards my goal.

As you know from talking with me we have very similar goals. Internet/real estate.

I have been saving all of my money so that I can leverage some real estate before I am even out of college.

Now that baseball is over for you, you should look for a job for sure. Save all of your earnings in a liquid money market account. Use the cash strictly for investment purposes only (ie. buy domains, develop website/marketing, saving for real estate).

Even with my busy work schedule, I found the time to build one of my websites. The way it happened was by (as mtnman said) writing down a CONCRETE DATE for the site to be completed by. It just flowed and happened exactly the day we planned and the site only took about 3 weeks to build with hard work.

I am developing a couple more sites right now, but I feel like I have been slacking due to lack of motivation. I am organizing a meeting with my developer and a couple other guys helping with the ventures so that we set CONCRETE DATES for our new projects to be completed.

I swear, as simple as it may be, writing down your goals is an UBER efficient way to get things done.

-Alex

I've really considered getting a job recently. I might get one assisting a local real estate agent soon if I can find one who is willing. I'm still just not sure that that is what I really want to do.

I guess I kinda feel overqualified for any job I'd get. I don't mind bird dogging, but after a while, I start slacking.

I have to agree that you have already achieved. It took me years to get in this mindset and you are already there at 17? That means you could be doing big things before you're 18. My goal was to start my business by 21. I missed it by a month... ha... Like we talked a little, if you figure out what you're passionate about, use those skills that come easy to you and abuse them to make a bunch of money :icon_super:

Thanks, Steve. You continue to inspire.

I see what you mean.

I have been a bit of an accomplished runner. Not because of natural talent though. I don't look like a runner in any fashion. My lung capacity is below average. The typical runner has a low heart rate, mine is not. I have drive and desire though. In the last couple of years of my life I have turned in times of 2:53 in the marathon and 36:20 in the 10K. It is all due to hard work and desire along with the love of running.

I run with a REALLY FAST and serious running group. It is amazing to see some of this natural talent that comes through. I have found myself thinking repeatedly, "if I just had their abilities...". The thing is that I frequently outperform them. Most of them do not have the same work ethic.

I do agree with you that you have a dilemma. You need to develop a hunger for this. A hunger that drives you to succeed. You have shown the beginnings of it by being here. The followthrough is up to you.

Sounds like you're just the opposite of me, SteveO.

I know there are things I'm going to have to work for, but I guess since I've never really had to work for anything before, I'm not quite sure how to overcome a challenge.

I use visual reminders as aids to stay focused during the day, at work and at home. I realized the power of visual reminders while I was in the Air Force. I liked the fact that you could walk down the hallway, or into an office, and see pics/quotes on leadership, integrity, and productivity. It helped a lot, especially on the moody days. I’ve also learned not to beat myself up on the days that I’m unproductive. Everyone needs a break every now and then. Just make sure the break doesn’t turn into multiple days, unless on vacation of course.

I like your tips, good lessons to follow. Rep +

Thanks for the rep, and thanks for the suggestion. I should definitely try some visual stuff. Maybe posters in my room will help.

I'm always aiming to be an under-achiever. Ok to the fact that you need to know stuff that might sink you otherwise, but everything else....why bother unless it get's you excited?

I don't mind others being over-achievers. I like them to do stuff for me. Someone needs to sacrifice their precious time on this earth I guess.

I definitely know what ya mean, and that's ultimately my plan; I just think there are at least some things I should start doing by myself before I begin to delegate everything.

I guess it's kinda like the situation with your best friend, JScott (), with his real estate endeavors. He's trying to get a few deals under his belt where he's the General Contractor before hire that task out.

Ryan and Michael, the fact that you both (respectively 17 and 16 years old) are active on this forum already demonstrates that you definitely don't have the mentality of under-achievers. Both of you are already thinking about entering the fastlane. Don't be too hard on yourself and continue to do the "time-wasting" things that you enjoy.

When I had your age I was "wasting" most of my non-school time playing the guitar in a rock band and playing tennis. Would I have been better off if I had spent that time in a "more useful" way? Maybe financially, but not in terms of happiness. My time with the band and winning tennis tournaments have contributed greatly in making me who I am today and I'm very happy with that. I would never consider to trade in those experiences and memories for money if the option would be offered to me now.

So, play on.

Thanks.

I do still play a hell of a lot of sports and hang out with friends all the time, but I have so much down time these days that I feel like I can really be doing something productive.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I think what it boils down to now is that at this point, I know I have the knowledge to do just about whatever I want. I think I have the basics to get started in real estate or in eBiz. My heart is probably more with real estate, but I like eBiz a lot, too, and I see a lot of potential there. I want to get my eBiz off the ground and running, and then I'll start to incorporate some real estate stuff into my current plan, too.

As always, thanks a lot. This place kicks a$$.

 

[Sid23]

I do agree with you that you have a dilemma. You need to develop a hunger for this. A hunger that drives you to succeed. You have shown the beginnings of it by being here. The followthrough is up to you.

Yankees,

I am 30 now, but in high school and college I was in the same boat as you. In high school, I was an all-state ice hockey and baseball player. NEVER worked at it, it just came easily to me. Life was amazing and easy for me!

I got a full tuition scholarship into one of the top 30 university's in the US based on my grades and ACT / SAT scores. I was extremely hungover when I took the ACT and I almost aced it.

I got a 3.5 GPA in college in a challenging major and I partied and drank 5-6 nights a week. I would go months and months without going to class. I had many girlfriends and getting girls was never difficult for me.

I could not believe how easy life was for me. I was good looking, smart, and had a great life.

PLEASE DON'T MISINTERPRET THE POINT OF THIS POST. I AM NOT BRAGGING AT ALL, BUT POSTING THIS AS A CAUTIONARY TALE FOR WHAT CAN HAPPEN TO SOMEONE WHO NEVER DEVELOPS A WORK ETHIC!

But let me tell you, sooner or later you will need to work hard. I NEVER LEARNED HOW AND I STUGGLED MIGHTILY AFTER COLLEGE.

My plan after college was to move to Hollywood and become a famous actor. I figured getting famous would take me 1-2 years and then I would be living the good life for the rest of my life.

I took 1 acting class a week, went an audition or two a month and basically partied and had fun. I lived on credit (since I wasn't making any money) and racked up over $70k in credit card debt in one year.

But I didn't care - I was always only one big acting gig away from making it big! (or so I thought)

BUT I NEVER WORKED HARD AT LEARNING TO BE AN ACTOR. I ASSUMED I WOULD JUST SHOW UP AT AN AUDITION AND READ MY LINES AND BECAUSE EVERYTHING HAD COME EASILY TO ME MY WHOLE LIFE, THIS WOULD TOO!

But acting did not come easily to me. And I didn't know what to do or how to make it better.

And then things changed. I stopped getting auditions, got horrible reviews in the few plays I was in and girls no longer thought I was desirable. Apparently, being 23-24 and dead broke in LA with no job and no car was not the way to land a supermodel.

I spent two more years living that life. I ended up making about $5k as an actor and put over $100k on credit cards supporting my lifestyle.

I know this sounds stupid and obvious, but when you think things will always come easily for you, you can end up making stupid decisions like I did.

The next 5 years I bounced from entry level to entry level job. Luckily for me, I read RDPD and the light came on.

So I spent the next 2 years trying to make money the RDPD way. But again, didn't work hard.

I now understand the importance of hard work. But Yankees, I'm 30, deep in debt and I know its going to take me a couple more years at least before I'm even remotely where I want to be.

And fear of failure is an issue for me now because I never failed at anything before acting. I didn't know how to bounce back from missing my target. It's hard to set your sights high and to try new things when you don't know what it feels like to really fail.

I had all the talent in the world to make it big in my 20s. But I pissed it away because I didn't understand the importance of hard work.

 

[Russ H]

Wow, some really great posts on this thread.

You bring out the best in us, Ryan (Yankees).

I consider myself a serious over-achiever.

Note that I don't really think this is a *good* thing.

It is what it is.

It's who I am.

At my high school, working longer/harder than all of the other kids meant I wound up on top.

Did all the homework. Did extra credit. Worked after school. Was in sports and orchestra (lots of practices).

I was considered "the smartest kid on the block", not b/c I was smart, but b/c I got good grades.

********

Then I went away to college.

BIG, rude, wake-up call.

Everyone in college is the smartest kid on their block (literally).

It's a fantastic, challenging environment. Invigorating.

But for me, it was terrifying.

I could no longer work harder to get better grades, or do better than others.

Working my hardest got me into the middle of the pack.

Again, this was a real shock to me, as I'd bought the "you're a smart kid" stuff.

I really *did* think I was smart/sharp.

I was, compared to the kids I went to high school with.

But not compared to the people I went to college with.

*******

This is not to scare you-- more to motivate you.

Things may come easy for you now.

But they may not always be that way.

So, instead of trying to become an overachiever,
why not develop survival tactics/strategies that will carry you through
once you hit your first speed bumps?

Thoughts:

-Try something that won't kill you, but is hard to do, and you like/want, but you have no natural skill for (say, try to make a complicated food dish, or try to solve a puzzle-- don't stop until it's solved!, or something else that challenges you.

Here's the key: Don't choose something that you think you're likely to fail at.

Choose something and tell yourself you're not going to quit-- that you're going to keep working at it until you have a solution.

I think that's probably the greatest character trait of an over-achiever that you would want:

Solving problems without giving up.

Other traits:

-Having passion for things-- which I think you do (even if you don't see it in yourself)

-Choosing to take the risk and move ahead when others shrink back (but only if you've done a risk analysis and know your odds of succeeding are better than they may appear)

-Learning from your mistakes, and turning them into positive things (another over achiever trait)

-Working like a madman on something, just because it's fun and you can see the fruits of your labors.

*****

Those are just a few thoughts, off the top of my head.

Giving yourself a challenge, and working your butt off is an over-achiever thing.

But learning how to deal with failure-- and how to learn from your mistakes-- is even more important----and these are not necessarily traits of over achievers.

But they are common to all successful people.

-Russ H.

 

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[kimberland]

I'm a work harder type of gal.
Due to my memory issues
(don't have one - grinning)
I always had to work for everything.

How do I do it?
The one more thing trick.
I tell myself 'just one more.'
Those one more's add up.

 

[Bilgefisher]

Yankee,

Imagine playing baseball against a team of 14 year olds. Sure you'll win almost every time. How much will you enjoy that win? Not nearly as much as if you played and beat last years High School champion team. Now would you consider a team that has a 32-0 record against 14 year olds over achievers. Or a team that has a 18-14 record versus the best over acheivers?

Bear with me a sec here. I believe you are an under achiever. Why? You haven't pushed yourself to YOUR full potential. Forget others for the time being. You obviously feel a lack of fulfillment in what you have done. So here is my advice for you, "Bite off more then you can chew, then chew it". Do that and you may get the satisfaction you are looking for.

I'll tell you I was the same way. Never studied in high school. Hell, I winged a final speech and got an A. Then I joined the Navy Nuke program. 2nd ranked engineering program in the nation. I was no longer top of the roost. I had to learn how to study. I had to push myself just to keep up with the class. I had to realize I wasn't the best, but I could push myself to keep up with the best. School was 7am-4pm and I spent 30+ hours every single week on top of that studying. I didn't finish top of the class, but I did find that satisfaction in knowing I gave it my all and I was able to keep up with the brightest in the nation.

Remember in the game of life there are always 14 year olds and High school champions. How will you test yourself?

 

[Yankees338]

I'm a work harder type of gal.
Due to my memory issues
(don't have one - grinning)
I always had to work for everything.

How do I do it?
The one more thing trick.
I tell myself 'just one more.'
Those one more's add up.

Sounds like my friends when they're working out...

Thanks.

Yankee,

Imagine playing baseball against a team of 14 year olds. Sure you'll win almost every time. How much will you enjoy that win? Not nearly as much as if you played and beat last years High School champion team. Now would you consider a team that has a 32-0 record against 14 year olds over achievers. Or a team that has a 18-14 record versus the best over acheivers?

Bear with me a sec here. I believe you are an under achiever. Why? You haven't pushed yourself to YOUR full potential. Forget others for the time being. You obviously feel a lack of fulfillment in what you have done. So here is my advice for you, "Bite off more then you can chew, then chew it". Do that and you may get the satisfaction you are looking for.

I'll tell you I was the same way. Never studied in high school. Hell, I winged a final speech and got an A. Then I joined the Navy Nuke program. 2nd ranked engineering program in the nation. I was no longer top of the roost. I had to learn how to study. I had to push myself just to keep up with the class. I had to realize I wasn't the best, but I could push myself to keep up with the best. School was 7am-4pm and I spent 30+ hours every single week on top of that studying. I didn't finish top of the class, but I did find that satisfaction in knowing I gave it my all and I was able to keep up with the brightest in the nation.

Remember in the game of life there are always 14 year olds and High school champions. How will you test yourself?

Great post. Rep+++

You're right. I've never really pushed myself for anything, and I think that's why I feel unsatisfied. Really liked the baseball analogy, by the way.

I'm not sure if I'm the type that's best off when I'm backed into a corner with no way out. I can't really recall a time that represents that. I'll see if I can come up with anything.


Thanks for all the replies everyone. There's really great stuff here. If you have anything -- please -- come forward with it!!

 

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[WheelsRCool]

Yankees, I suggest you do some stuff like write down skillsets to learn: learn accounting, learn finance, learn to code Web pages, learn the computer languages like C++, Java, Perl, Python, etc...get some art books and learn to draw very well, read books on all sorts of different subjects, get some music composition software and maybe learn to compose music, learn electronics, you could tinker with electronics in musical instruments, see if you can learn engines in cars (nothing cooler than being "that guy" everyone goes to to soup up their guitars and car engines), etc...become a Renaissance man!

 

[Kung Fu Steve]

I am reminded of the tale of the Tortiose and the Hare. Or possibly the Ant and the Grasshopper.

 

[SteveO]

I know there are things I'm going to have to work for, but I guess since I've never really had to work for anything before, I'm not quite sure how to overcome a challenge.

Well, I have a challenge for you then. Find a job that puts you in the middle of many others. Find a way to accelerate above the crowd through innovations and hard work. You will then know how to overcome.

 

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[JesseO]

Forgive me for not reading anything but the first posting here.......From the last 5 years of my life I've learned that it is soooo easy to simply sit back and ride whatever wave you're on at the time.
What I have learned from my own problems, setbacks, and issues is that you always have to strive for the BEST. If that means that you're working for yourself, then you have to act like you have a 100,000 bonus sitting on your shoulders for each TINY little project you have to do. You honestly have to be the best you possibly can be or else there's someone else who can do better. I've learned that heart and enthusiasm in a job make up the most, because those two produce the most results. Reread that sentence and highlight it. Make it happen, and make it happen right. If you do that, then you'll pass Trump (for reasons not expressed within).
The whole world is out there. Taking care of business is 90% of what you need to do. It's taken me a long time to realize that hard work surpasses any intelligence, education, or family push that you might have. You've still got to take care of the issues. Imagine if Ford Jr. was a lazy child who would only suck up money...Ford would have been in GM's spot 50 years ago.
Fortunately, I have some amazing guidance as to how life can be, and how to overcome some MAJOR obstacles. I am fortunate. Even if I was a Fortunate Son (CCR Plug) then I would probably have wasted my time and life. Honestly, things are much more difficult than they appear and if you don't want to ride on coat-tails, then you've got to have the drive. The drive is what is most important.
I know I'm rambling and skirted most issues at heart here, but I think that the general substance is what's most important in response to the first posting that you made. As I said, I haven't read every response. All I have to say, to sum it all up....is that it's all up to you. Best of luck man =) I wish everyone here gets an amazing drive out of this website. It's one of the best things that's ever happened to all of us. Thanks MJ.

 

[alainn]

I've come to the conclusion that I'm an under-achiever. Everything that I've really accomplished thus far in my life has been because of gifts that I've been blessed with -- physical or mental.

I want to become an over-achiever; I just don't quite know how.

I know I need to learn to focus better and stay motivated.

I need to work more efficiently.

This is the first result I found that wasn't unrelated (like how to make your "Sim" -- from The Sims 2, I assume -- an over-achiever): How to Become an Overachiever - wikiHow



Certainly not as specific as I'd like, but it's a start.

Any thoughts? What do YOU do to help achieve your goals?

I think the best part of this is hanging out with people who will be a positive influence in your life. I've done a lot of reading on mindset and basically succeeding in life. And, time and time again, a major theme that keeps being repeated in various books and stuff is that you are basically the 5 people you spend the most time with. If you want to see what your future will look like, look at the 5 people you spend the most time with and you will see. If you don't like it, change the people you hang out with most. good luck!

 

[Nicola]

You might like to check out this site:

Intro to Cyborg 101 | Grasshopper Enterprises

It is essentially about how someone managed to to develop discipline and focus

Hope that helps

 

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