The Finality Of Life

[Chitown]

Vig,

My condolences to you and your mentors' family. You wrote a beautiful post about a man who moved you in more ways than you can probably
comprehend.

I plan to quit my shit job -- chauffeur -- Oct. 31st. One of the trigger events that set me on my exit journey was the death of one of my colleagues...from a massive heart attack...in the limousine holding lot...at Los Angeles International Airport.

His name was Steve.

My last conversation with him was at the infamous Chateau Marmont -- site of John Belushi's untimely demise -- at a fashion event where we both had clients. It was freezing that night. "Colder than a witch's tit in a polar bear's mouth...", as my dad would often say when I was growing up in Chicago.

Steve asked how busy I was, as work was slow for him. I had a lot of requests that week -- things were okay. He didn't know how his bills were going to be paid.

[The owner hires extra chauffeurs so as to push all the drivers down to part time. I don't get sick days, paid time off or holiday pay. I can't afford the company health plan so I have no coverage. Our Christmas bonus was eight hours of pay -- I make $8/hr + gratuity -- even though I am required to make myself available to drive twelve hour shifts. Not complaining -- just stating some facts.]

Steve mentioned going to work for a rival company, where the chauffeurs were paid $11/hr. I told him that sounded like a plan. As my passenger walked toward the car, Steve wouldn't let me get out of the car. He helped my client into the back seat and waved good-bye.

He was dead a week and a half later. I'm glad I told him it was good to see him. I meant it, too. He was a good dude. His family came by the job to collect his things. They had not spoken to him in years. I remembered looking at his father and two siblings and wondering what happened to cause such a breakdown in communication. He is missed.

Vig and all the other Fastlaners who posted are right. Life is too short to deal with balderdash and a$$ wipes.

I am quitting my shit job Oct. 31st.

 

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[FastNAwesome]

NOTE: drunken post, but maybe that makes it honest even more. But I'm always sincere with you guys anyway, I love you.

I found out Steve's Wife, as I write this, is dying. She was diagnosed with an incurable disease a few months ago.

Hey man...my prayers are with her. It's a very ungrateful subject...but if doctors gave up and say it incurable, why should she accept it? F*ck incurable and impossible! My step dad survived...(and thanks for your prayers). He had carotid artery blockage of 100% + very old. So they told him the risk of surgery is bigger than just living and waiting for stroke. But he's not the type of guy to wait for that shit.

I want to help, but don't know how...a smart woman once told me "never recommend a doctor". Of course, I didn't listen...and recommended a clinic to my friend where I was treated well. And he was treated well...and a few months letter the clinic was closed and was all over newspapers as "clinic of death".

Treat that as a disclaimer, this is a book that I haven't tried but it maybe gives hope The Breuss Cancer Cure : Advice for the Prevention and Natural Treatment of Cancer, Leukemia and Other Seemingly Incurable Diseases: Rudolf Breuss: Amazon.com: Books

Maybe THEY will find the cure. Maybe love will work out as a cure. I hope it will. They have my sincere wishes from the heart.

 

[goodfella]

We all seem to believe we have unlimited time on this earth but maybe its because we know how long were supposed to live, we have an age, we have clocks and calenders to tell us whether we're far or nearing our final days. Sometimes it all seems so fragile but I don't know, I guess it's just the mystery of life.

 

[Bigguns50]

My step dad survived...

Fantastic Fast ! So glad for you man. Great to hear good news.

My friend, being deeply religious, has a bit of grief. As he put it..paraphrasing...I turned to my religion and neglected science. He did not seek other doctors or alternatives. He didn't research for cures.

It's a BIG world and I agree with you in not giving up and don't take one person's opinion that you only have so many options or that you should or shouldn't do something.

I have hope for his Wife and family and I know he appreciates everyone's prayers. Thank you.

 

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[Chitown]

FastNAwesome,

It's fantastic that your stepdad survived.

 

[Bigguns50]

Goodfella...I've gotta expand on your theory a bit. It is interesting.

Several years ago I worked out at a gym out of town. I used a piece of equipment I've never used before. I loaded it up. Heavy...but not enough. Loaded more weights...getting there...and then more...ahh just right. I banged out some reps. I noticed a group of 4 big guys eying me as I trained. When I was done I said something to them..and they said something like.."Damn man, you're strong as a bull. I never saw anyone push that much on that machine." I said, "thanks. Never used it before".

Later I thought...what would have happened if I had known what I was pushing was supposed to be really heavy ? Since I didn't know the machine...I didn't know how much weight I was suppose to do. I didn't know how much was a lot.

You can apply this thought to many things in life...

 

[Mike Kavanagh]

I am headed in the same direction. I am losing my older sister. She is only 2 years older than I am. I found out today that she may die by the end of the week. Or she may live up to 6 months.

She has 2 kids, one who doesn't even know she exists(Father's wishes, doesn't want him to go through the pain of losing his mother that young, unfair but not my choice) and the other, she thinks that he thinks she hates him.

Cancer is rough on everyone.


Sorry for your loss Vig. I haven't had a real mentor yet so I can't completely say I know what you're going through.
May he rest in peace.

 

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[Vigilante]

Mike. That is devastating news about your sister. I hate cancer.

 

[Vigilante]

Life is funny. Today around 11 AM I will see my final goodbyes to my friend. At around the same time… Halfway across the country… My best friend will become a grandfather for the first time today. The circle of life. Full-spectrum. Rejoicing on one side at a new beginning and a brand-new life. Morning and celebrating the life on the other side of a life lived well.

 

[campbellronald7]

Simply great and motivational post! Thanks for posting.

 

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[Bigguns50]

"It Is Always Now"

 

[Bigguns50]

bump


This is a great thread to remind us of our most precious asset .... of the End we all will meet....and how to truly live.

My Mother passed away 2 days ago. I was very, very close to her and we had a wonderful relationship.

A little about Mom....

My Father died when I was 9 and she raised me alone. She never re-married. She was the least selfish person I knew.

She was strong, kind, and had a great sense of humor. Laughter was always in our home. All my friends in High School would tell me my Mom's "so cool". She lived a simple life. Family....that was always her focus. She had lots of friends (sadly she outlived them all...and all her siblings). She paid cash for everything and was very frugal. She always had what she needed. She never had a desire to travel. A simple life is what she preferred.

--------------------

She was 89. She suffered from Alzheimer's for about 5 years. She was not to the point of not remembering us (family), but when I would visit in the morning, she would forget I was there by the afternoon. As time went on, more and more of my Mom's personality was lost.

While in the nursing home (which was wonderful.... she was happy), she was working on her Word Puzzle book in her wheelchair, had a stroke in her brain, and fell to the floor. Three days later she died.

I visited her the day before she died and she was on morphine and some other drug. The dry erase board on the wall with all kinds of information neatly organized for the staff and family to see had "Today's Goal". Under that, the word "Comfortable" was written. This was not a recovery situation.

It was incredibly hard to see her this way. Mostly unconscious but at times still slightly aware of things going on around her. She would respond but ever so slightly with a tilt of her head or a movement with her right arm. The stroke left her left side paralyzed and unable to open her eyes.

I said my goodbye that day because I knew she would crossover soon. She never wanted anyone to ever fuss over her when she passed. She made this very clear to everyone over the years. "Say what you have to say and get on with your life.", she said.

So Thanksgiving this year is joyous, and difficult. I will enjoy the day with my Wife's family. The day after Thanksgiving when I would normally visit my Mom....I will attend her funeral.

I'm a pretty tough guy, raised by a pretty tough Mom. As my Mom would want, the day after she died I got right back to work.......but with a very, very, heavy heart.

I never thought these things would happen to my Mom. The reality is anything can happen to anyone at any time. Believe this truth and LIVE your life. Share your feelings. Spend time with loved ones. Love each other. Help people.

 

[Vigilante]

bump


This is a great thread to remind us of our most precious asset .... of the End we all will meet....and how to truly live.

My Mother passed away 2 days ago. I was very, very close to her and we had a wonderful relationship.

A little about Mom....

My Father died when I was 9 and she raised me alone. She never re-married. She was the least selfish person I knew.

She was strong, kind, and had a great sense of humor. Laughter was always in our home. All my friends in High School would tell me my Mom's "so cool". She lived a simple life. Family....that was always her focus. She had lots of friends (sadly she outlived them all...and all her siblings). She paid cash for everything and was very frugal. She always had what she needed. She never had a desire to travel. A simple life is what she preferred.

--------------------

She was 89. She suffered from Alzheimer's for about 5 years. She was not to the point of not remembering us (family), but when I would visit in the morning, she would forget I was there by the afternoon. As time went on, more and more of my Mom's personality was lost.

While in the nursing home (which was wonderful.... she was happy), she was working on her Word Puzzle book in her wheelchair, had a stroke in her brain, and fell to the floor. Three days later she died.

I visited her the day before she died and she was on morphine and some other drug. The dry erase board on the wall with all kinds of information neatly organized for the staff and family to see had "Today's Goal". Under that, the word "Comfortable" was written. This was not a recovery situation.

It was incredibly hard to see her this way. Mostly unconscious but at times still slightly aware of things going on around her. She would respond but ever so slightly with a tilt of her head or a movement with her right arm. The stroke left her left side paralyzed and unable to open her eyes.

I said my goodbye that day because I knew she would crossover soon. She never wanted anyone to ever fuss over her when she passed. She made this very clear to everyone over the years. "Say what you have to say and get on with your life.", she said.

So Thanksgiving this year is joyous, and difficult. I will enjoy the day with my Wife's family. The day after Thanksgiving when I would normally visit my Mom....I will attend her funeral.

I'm a pretty tough guy, raised by a pretty tough Mom. As my Mom would want, the day after she died I got right back to work.......but with a very, very, heavy heart.

I never thought these things would happen to my Mom. The reality is anything can happen to anyone at any time. Believe this truth and LIVE your life. Share your feelings. Spend time with loved ones. Love each other. Help people.

My deepest sympathies brother.

 

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[IceCreamKid]

I never thought these things would happen to my Mom. The reality is anything can happen to anyone at any time. Believe this truth and LIVE your life. Share your feelings. Spend time with loved ones. Love each other. Help people.

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss, brother. I can't imagine how you must feel right now.

Thank you for being so open and honest about your feelings. And thank you for the reminder. In the pursuit of the money it's easy to lose touch with what really matters.

 

[Chitown]

This is a great thread to remind us of our most precious asset .... of the End we all will meet....and how to truly live.

My Mother passed away 2 days ago. I was very, very close to her and we had a wonderful relationship.

A little about Mom....

My Father died when I was 9 and she raised me alone. She never re-married. She was the least selfish person I knew.

She was strong, kind, and had a great sense of humor. Laughter was always in our home. All my friends in High School would tell me my Mom's "so cool". She lived a simple life. Family....that was always her focus. She had lots of friends (sadly she outlived them all...and all her siblings). She paid cash for everything and was very frugal. She always had what she needed. She never had a desire to travel. A simple life is what she preferred.

--------------------

She was 89. She suffered from Alzheimer's for about 5 years. She was not to the point of not remembering us (family), but when I would visit in the morning, she would forget I was there by the afternoon. As time went on, more and more of my Mom's personality was lost.

While in the nursing home (which was wonderful.... she was happy), she was working on her Word Puzzle book in her wheelchair, had a stroke in her brain, and fell to the floor. Three days later she died.

I visited her the day before she died and she was on morphine and some other drug. The dry erase board on the wall with all kinds of information neatly organized for the staff and family to see had "Today's Goal". Under that, the word "Comfortable" was written. This was not a recovery situation.

It was incredibly hard to see her this way. Mostly unconscious but at times still slightly aware of things going on around her. She would respond but ever so slightly with a tilt of her head or a movement with her right arm. The stroke left her left side paralyzed and unable to open her eyes.

I said my goodbye that day because I knew she would crossover soon. She never wanted anyone to ever fuss over her when she passed. She made this very clear to everyone over the years. "Say what you have to say and get on with your life.", she said.

So Thanksgiving this year is joyous, and difficult. I will enjoy the day with my Wife's family. The day after Thanksgiving when I would normally visit my Mom....I will attend her funeral.

I'm a pretty tough guy, raised by a pretty tough Mom. As my Mom would want, the day after she died I got right back to work.......but with a very, very, heavy heart.

I never thought these things would happen to my Mom. The reality is anything can happen to anyone at any time. Believe this truth and LIVE your life. Share your feelings. Spend time with loved ones. Love each other. Help people.

@Bigguns50,

True that, brother! I think about mortality everyday, especially given that I'm an older father. I was 39 when my first son was born. I turn 45 in two weeks on the 10th. Everyday I think about mortality.

My condolences to you, brother.

 

[safff]

Sorry to hear of your loss of a friend Vigilante, I am in a similar position with my father and it's a strange process but at the best it leaves time for appreciation. He sounds like a hell of a guy

 

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[BlakeIC]

I need an hourglass now
.
I am getting an hourglass now

 

[Bigguns50]

And thank you for the reminder. In the pursuit of the money it's easy to lose touch with what really matters.

Thank you and you're welcome. That was my purpose...to remind. Agreed.

@Vigilanti ... thank you.

Everyday I think about mortality.

Thank you and this is good !

I need an hourglass now

Truly a great reminder.

 

[FastNAwesome]

My Mother passed away 2 days ago. I was very, very close to her and we had a wonderful relationship.

A little about Mom....

My Father died when I was 9 and she raised me alone. She never re-married. She was the least selfish person I knew.

She was strong, kind, and had a great sense of humor. Laughter was always in our home. All my friends in High School would tell me my Mom's "so cool". She lived a simple life. Family....that was always her focus. She had lots of friends (sadly she outlived them all...and all her siblings). She paid cash for everything and was very frugal. She always had what she needed. She never had a desire to travel. A simple life is what she preferred.

My deepest condolences man.

From the way you described her it can be felt how great person she was.
How big is her legacy. And how much love was in her heart, in her house, and she passed it on to you.

Because love can be felt in your words. Hard to not get emotional.

 

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