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What are some of the excuses that kill dreams?

Anything related to matters of the mind

Spenny

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I met this business student about six months ago. At the time, he was doing lots of mental masturbation - plenty of ideas floating around in his head & I sat down with him to narrow one down. We selected one, a software idea that he had been cooking for the past year. Right there on the spot, he called his friend to start on this project and I was CHUFFED to see he had made a step in the right direction.

Or so I thought....

Fast foward to yesterday, I bumped into him, I was bubbling to hear how his progress was.

He hadn't started one bit. ONE BIT.

Joy quickly shifted to disappointment. What the hell happened? You had such a great idea, why didn't you start?

He said that after his call, he actually met up with the friend & shook hands with him. They promised they were going to do something.

And here we are, six months of nothing?

"University is getting in the way, I should do it after uni"
"Oh my product would never work because small businesses are cutting budget"
"You should read this book on agriculture, loads of millionaires are purchasing up land. Now is the time to get into agriculture."
"I have this other idea which I think is better, it has a better CAGR for the next two decades"
"The economy is not in the right place right now"
"Theres a huge montary shift, this is not the time to be making a business"

Excuse after excuse. I just couldn't believe how many he had. It felt like mental barbed wire.

I then said I was going to keep him accountable on this. The next time I saw him, I would be VERY upset if he had not made one step forward.

He then extended his hand to shake on it. I pinched my bridge instead.

I wish I could say this story was made up, it certainly isn't. But, we could make something of it.

What are some of the excuses that kill dreams?
 
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K1 Lambo

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I met this business student about six months ago. At the time, he was doing lots of mental masturbation - plenty of ideas floating around in his head & I sat down with him to narrow one down. We selected one, a software idea that he had been cooking for the past year. Right there on the spot, he called his friend to start on this project and I was CHUFFED to see he had made a step in the right direction.

Or so I thought....

Fast foward to yesterday, I bumped into him, I was bubbling to hear how his progress was.

He hadn't started one bit. ONE BIT.

Joy quickly shifted to disappointment. What the hell happened? You had such a great idea, why didn't you start?

He said that after his call, he actually met up with the friend & shook hands with him. They promised they were going to do something.

And here we are, six months of nothing?

"University is getting in the way, I should do it after uni"
"Oh my product would never work because small businesses are cutting budget"
"You should read this book on agriculture, loads of millionaires are purchasing up land. Now is the time to get into agriculture."
"I have this other idea which I think is better, it has a better CAGR for the next two decades"
"The economy is not in the right place right now"
"Theres a huge montary shift, this is not the time to be making a business"

Excuse after excuse. I just couldn't believe how many he had. It felt like mental barbed wire.

I then said I was going to keep him accountable on this. The next time I saw him, I would be VERY upset if he had not made one step forward.

He then extended his hand to shake on it. I pinched my bridge instead.

I wish I could say this story was made up, it certainly isn't. But, we could make something of it.

What are some of the excuses that kill dreams?
I think most excuses that 99% of people have are symptoms of a real underlying problem which is they constantly lie to themselves by compromising their standards. That's a huge self-esteem killer. In other words, it kills the belief to believe in yourself, so what do most people do? They procrastinate day after day after day for a long period of time aka 6 months, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years, 20 years etc. So now, being that person who "skips" the gym, "never" takes his shot at his dreams or approaches his dream lady becomes a part of their identity and that's what kills most dreams from my experience.

This leads to all kinds of excuses like:
"Oh It's just one pizza". Wrong.
"Oh I'm just not lucky". Wrong. No such thing as luck in business, fitness or anything worth having in life.
"Oh I'll skip prospecting today because I'm tired. It's only one day". Wrong.
"Oh I don't know any rich people". Wrong. You can get your a$$ up and look for them in your richest neighborhood.
"Oh, I don't feel like working out today. Let me skip this one workout. I deserve it!". Wrong. You've been skipping the gym your whole life, you're 70 pounds of overweight and it's day 6 so you deserve it?

You see where I'm going with this? THIS is very true for people who are already doing something, which already puts them ahead of like 70% of the population. BUT what happens then is they start to compromise TO skip what is actually required to move them forward and make excuses to make themselves feel better.

Example: You're on a 90 day outdoor challenge, and your main objective is to walk outside for 30 minutes everyday. No matter the weather, how you "feel" or if you just got fired at your job. So you're doing good, you're on day 36 but now it gets boring, you no longer want to do it so on day 36 you've decided to take a break and eat potato chips while watching Shrek. And guess what? That one decision F*cks up the whole process! Right there you've lost the war.

I know it because I've done it myself in the past. I'm sure most successful people have compromised themselves in the past at some point in their lifetime. But that one bad decision is what it takes to ruin everything for most people(they don't see it though).

Think of a skyscraper like the One World Trade Center in NYC(shoutout to New Yorkers on the forum!).

Think of how much engineering, architecture, electricity, construction and planning all of it requires to build a magnificent skyscraper AND how much time it needs to be fully constructed. Years of work. But guess how long it takes to destroy it? You can destroy it in one minute with a wrecking ball by swinging it a couple of times. It's the same thing with your life.

Which is why so many people are lazy today with no ambition because they've lied to themselves too much to a point where it's a part of them now.
 

Johnny boy

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Think of a skyscraper like the One World Trade Center in NYC(shoutout to New Yorkers on the forum!).

Think of how much engineering, architecture, electricity, construction and planning all of it requires to build a magnificent skyscraper AND how much time it needs to be fully constructed. Years of work. But guess how long it takes to destroy it? You can destroy it in one minute with a wrecking ball by swinging it a couple of times.
Or a plane lol ✈️
 

lol

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Or a plane lol ✈️
very dark.. but yes

"University is getting in the way, I should do it after uni"
I'm so glad someone brought this up. I'm having this same thought in my head. I get that I will have free time but it's extremely limited, especially with my upcoming uni schedule (borderline death sentence). But I've let it get to me before and I won't let it stop me again. I guess it counts as long as I progress a little each day and don't abandon ship.
 
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alexkuzmov

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I met this business student about six months ago. At the time, he was doing lots of mental masturbation - plenty of ideas floating around in his head & I sat down with him to narrow one down. We selected one, a software idea that he had been cooking for the past year. Right there on the spot, he called his friend to start on this project and I was CHUFFED to see he had made a step in the right direction.

Or so I thought....

Fast foward to yesterday, I bumped into him, I was bubbling to hear how his progress was.

He hadn't started one bit. ONE BIT.

Joy quickly shifted to disappointment. What the hell happened? You had such a great idea, why didn't you start?

He said that after his call, he actually met up with the friend & shook hands with him. They promised they were going to do something.

And here we are, six months of nothing?

"University is getting in the way, I should do it after uni"
"Oh my product would never work because small businesses are cutting budget"
"You should read this book on agriculture, loads of millionaires are purchasing up land. Now is the time to get into agriculture."
"I have this other idea which I think is better, it has a better CAGR for the next two decades"
"The economy is not in the right place right now"
"Theres a huge montary shift, this is not the time to be making a business"

Excuse after excuse. I just couldn't believe how many he had. It felt like mental barbed wire.

I then said I was going to keep him accountable on this. The next time I saw him, I would be VERY upset if he had not made one step forward.

He then extended his hand to shake on it. I pinched my bridge instead.

I wish I could say this story was made up, it certainly isn't. But, we could make something of it.

What are some of the excuses that kill dreams?
Does it matter?

Those who can, DO.
Those who cant, think of excuses and complain.

In any case, less competition this way, the market is brutal enough, let the excusers be.

You are making a mistake (which most of us here did), and the mistake is that you are conflicting potential with latent ability.

Just because any person has the potential to do something, doesnt mean they can. They dont posses the ability.
You think that your friend does, but he doesnt and he has shown that to you.
There is more to making a business, chasing dreams, achieving goals etc. than potential, motivation and the "right" attitude.

You need the ability to focus, take rejection, build habits.
You need the ability to overcome boredom and dissapoitment.
You need the ability to network with people, be pleasent to be around, not avoided.

There is more, but I'll stop here.
The point is you are making the mistake of thinking that people have abilties that they dont.
Which will lead to your next mistake which you are on the verge of making which is: "waste time with these people"
 

Spenny

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Does it matter?

Those who can, DO.
Those who cant, think of excuses and complain.

In any case, less competition this way, the market is brutal enough, let the excusers be.

You are making a mistake (which most of us here did), and the mistake is that you are conflicting potential with latent ability.

Just because any person has the potential to do something, doesnt mean they can. They dont posses the ability.
You think that your friend does, but he doesnt and he has shown that to you.
There is more to making a business, chasing dreams, achieving goals etc. than potential, motivation and the "right" attitude.

You need the ability to focus, take rejection, build habits.
You need the ability to overcome boredom and dissapoitment.
You need the ability to network with people, be pleasent to be around, not avoided.

There is more, but I'll stop here.
The point is you are making the mistake of thinking that people have abilties that they dont.
Which will lead to your next mistake which you are on the verge of making which is: "waste time with these people"
Yeah you're right. Even when I left I knew he wasn't gonna do a thing. I think I still try because I know this person would be great but I also want to know that at least I tried.
 
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alexkuzmov

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Yeah you're right. Even when I left I knew he wasn't gonna do a thing. I think I still try because I know this person would be great but I also want to know that at least I tried.
Its good to try at least once, you never know if the person just needs little nudge.
Trying more than once quickly becomes a waste of time.
 

Ing

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If you study 100%, you will allways get the best degrees.
If you only study to get your master in the end, you will have plenty of time to build whatever you want.
In my studying time, I organized a 2 weekly lucrative fleamarket in my hometown
I built up a food kiosk while I had to care about the fleamarket.
I had a motorcycle spare parts shop.

Beneeth the study.

I studied to get my special job I still do.
I made my mistake, when I went out of university and immediately got the job:
Also immediately I canceled all businesses and only did the shop further on.

MJ calls a good shop a trap regarding fastline.

What I wanted to say: University may be an excuse, if you want best grades or if you struggle with learning from any reason.

But no ultimative excuse not to make it.

My excuse now: medical issues, time issues (resting and surfing while it is bs.imo, but I do it though). Sports time necessary to have time with my son and th recover medically.
And I often let me bring down, when I discuss my ideas with my sons.
 

heavy_industry

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"University is getting in the way, I should do it after uni"
"Oh my product would never work because small businesses are cutting budget"
"You should read this book on agriculture, loads of millionaires are purchasing up land. Now is the time to get into agriculture."
"I have this other idea which I think is better, it has a better CAGR for the next two decades"
"The economy is not in the right place right now"
"Theres a huge montary shift, this is not the time to be making a business"
This is why it is a very bad idea to lie, especially to yourself.
It doesn't matter how well you word your excuses, all of them are lies used to cover up the truth:

You did not do it because you did not want to.

Fear of failure, or fear of wasting time/effort, or perceived inability to do something (lack of skills/knowledge) are usually the most credible excuses, but they are still lies. If you really want something, you will eventually get it. Or at the very least you will get some bit of it.

Best example that comes to mind is Arnold Schwarzenegger:
In his acting career, he was initially rejected because of his strong accent. Fast forward 20 years, he has now one of the most recognizable voices in the world... because of his strong accent.
Afterwards he decided to get into politics. He was unable to candidate for US presidency, so he ended up being the governor of California.


"Ask, and it will be given you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and it will be opened for you." - Matthew 7:7

If you want to make it happen, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse.
 
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football4life

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life is binary, you either do it or you don't. if you never do it, it means you weren't meant to be an entrepreneur... seems to be the case with your friend.
 

Spenny

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life is binary, you either do it or you don't. if you never do it, it means you weren't meant to be an entrepreneur... seems to be the case with your friend.
Unfortunately so, action faking & bullshitting isnt the best.
 

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