Divorced and Looking to get out of the Rat Race

[telly123]

Hi all,

Recently joined and glad to be a part of this community.

A bit of background. It's been a turbulent three years. In this time I've become divorced, which drove me on to bring in an additional income to my generic IT job 9-5 (not a coding roles), via matched betting. This allowed me to purchase my own house shortly after the divorce went through.

The match betting value is starting to dwindle and therefore isn't sustainable long term. I'm now investigating other business possibilities, although at present I'm really struggling to think of a product/service.

I understand from reading 'Unscripted ' that one of the main cornerstones is about bringing value to others. If I'm honest one of my main motivators for becoming a successful businessman is to be able to spend time with my daughter and to be able to live near her if my ex decides to move to another part of the country. I want to be able to take her to clubs, be there in person throughout her upbringing. The idea that she won't grow up with a strong father figure in her life, frankly, scares the sh1t out of me. I want the best for her more than anything in the world and using this fear as fuel to succeed.

I'm looking at location independent roles, even considering options such as Affiliate Marketing, trading and learning to become a full time poker player. I know these go against the CENTS ethos, but at least these offer a way out of the 9-5 and give me location independence. I'm quite happy staring at a computer screen all day long, it's pretty much what I do at work all day and then matched betting for several hours each evening and more at the weekend.

I seem to lack creativity at present. Strengths include high boredom threshold, addictive/obsessive personality, very strong work ethic, (never miss a gym session, eat clean food all the time, work 9-5 where I'm a top performer, work several hours on matched betting each evening and all weekend, literally every day). My ex said to other people and me after we split that she's never met anyone else as resilient, who can focus on one thing and just keep going and going, and she's at upper management level in a government job. She did say I need to believe in myself more than I do, which I agree with. I'm also prone to analysis through paralysis through constant research and reading.

I'm considering Affiliate Marketing and the other options as I don't mind working hands on for long hours, as long as I can get out the rat race and from there maybe learn more business skills and awaken the creative part of me which hasn't been utilized for a long time now. From there look at a fastlane business.

At present I seem to be a machine/work horse with little entrepreneurial nouse, I'm sure this is something that can be worked on.

Money motivates me, I'd love to be rich - the freedom it brings and not being an employee is important.

Would be interested in what you guys think about my situation.

Thanks!

 

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[Nova]

Welcome to the forum.

The idea that she won't grow up with a strong father figure in her life, frankly, scares the sh1t out of me. I want the best for her more than anything in the world and using this fear as fuel to succeed.

I have never been in the same position as you, but what you have written here resonates with me so much. You may find some value in the Order of Man podcast, which is all about becoming a better man in business, family and other areas.

I have listened to a whole bunch recently after finding out about it myself through a post on this forum and one of the discussions was your exact situation - how to stay part of your children's life in the most fulfilling way after a breakup or divorce. Apologies that I can't remember the specific podcast but looking at this may be a good starting point.

 

[telly123]

Welcome to the forum.



I have never been in the same position as you, but what you have written here resonates with me so much. You may find some value in the Order of Man podcast, which is all about becoming a better man in business, family and other areas.

I have listened to a whole bunch recently after finding out about it myself through a post on this forum and one of the discussions was your exact situation - how to stay part of your children's life in the most fulfilling way after a breakup or divorce. Apologies that I can't remember the specific podcast but looking at this may be a good starting point.

Cool, cheers mate - will certainly give it a look later on!

 

[superb]

Welcome to the forum!

While some of the business activities you mentioned aren't "fastlane", most of us have (or had) to do other things to support ourselves throughout the process. Affiliate Marketing would not be my first choice with all of the noise on the internet now days, but I have no experience with A/M, so take that for what it is. There are many things that you can do that aren't directly fastlane but give you experience that can eventually be used in a fastlane business. Copy writing and web design are things that can be done remotely and locally (even better) - wherever you end up), I'm sure there are many more things.

Don't get hung up on CENTS for the moment. Ideally the first thing you would pick would pass the CENTS test, but it may take some time to find. In the meantime get experience serving others in the best way possible and you'll be farther ahead than you would spending hours, days or even years trying to figure out what your "ideal" business would be. The more you engage with others in the marketplace, the greater you chance of finding a business idea that would pass CENTS.

 

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[Maxboost]

Cross poker off of your list. The odds of making decent money is slim to none. The competition is soo good nowadays you are better off doing something else. There is usually opportunity in live games but that is drying up as well.

Doug Polk struggled throughout his entire micro stakes challenge. It took him 2-3 years to get to 10k and that is with making a huge risk with his bankroll. He never would have completed it without gambling with his bankroll and could not compete the challenge without bending the rules.

The poker dream is dead in my opinion.

 

[telly123]

Welcome to the forum!

While some of the business activities you mentioned aren't "fastlane", most of us have (or had) to do other things to support ourselves throughout the process. Affiliate Marketing would not be my first choice with all of the noise on the internet now days, but I have no experience with A/M, so take that for what it is. There are many things that you can do that aren't directly fastlane but give you experience that can eventually be used in a fastlane business. Copy writing and web design are things that can be done remotely and locally (even better) - wherever you end up), I'm sure there are many more things.

Don't get hung up on CENTS for the moment. Ideally the first thing you would pick would pass the CENTS test, but it may take some time to find. In the meantime get experience serving others in the best way possible and you'll be farther ahead than you would spending hours, days or even years trying to figure out what your "ideal" business would be. The more you engage with others in the marketplace, the greater you chance of finding a business idea that would pass CENTS.

The idea of web design appeals to me, I'll take a closer look at that idea. In fact, my brother is trying to get his PT'ing sideline off the ground, so could be an opportunity for me to serve/help him for free. Then from there could use the site is design for him in my portfolio to take on paid clients. Would you say HTML/CSS is worth learning rather than Wordpress?

Thanks for the response, much appreciated.

 

[telly123]

Cross poker off of your list. The odds of making decent money is slim to none. The competition is soo good nowadays you are better off doing something else. There is usually opportunity in live games but that is drying up as well.

Doug Polk struggled throughout his entire micro stakes challenge. It took him 2-3 years to get to 10k and that is with making a huge risk with his bankroll. He never would have completed it without gambling with his bankroll and could not compete the challenge without bending the rules.

The poker dream is dead in my opinion.

OK cheers - will strike it off my list. Can't imagine it has many directly transferable skills, so not worth the time investment if it's no longer lucrative.

 

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[Royce2]

Welcome @telly123,

@superb and @Maxboost are completely right. I actually went into poker and quickly realized how much different it is from real life poker. There's so much you don't know about the opponents it makes it THAT much harder. As well as webdesign and copyrighting, I am going into that even though I'm messing about with the construction industry. Seems laughable but it's really not, I know without a doubt in my mind those skills will be crucial to my success because with those skills, you are either going to end up learning yourself or paying a premium to someone else to do it for you. I'd prefer the first.

Other than that, I wish I had your work ethic and just a fair warning. There is A LOT of information on here and try not to get too sucked into that. One thing I learned from these guys is Action Action Action and Fail Fail Fail. Master those 6 things and you're a guaranteed fastlaner because that one successful moment is right after that.

See you on the Fastlane.
Royce

 

[superb]

Would you say HTML/CSS is worth learning rather than Wordpress?

Thanks for the response, much appreciated.

If you are already in IT, Wordpress will likely be a piece of cake for you. You can do a lot with Wordpress alone, especially with pre-made themes. Wordpress is often used for the basis of a lot of professional sites even if the intent is to customize it with HTML/CSS to the point where it doesn't even resemble the original wordpress theme. In this case it's more of a pre-built infrastructure providing an easy way to add/remove/organize content. No point re-inventing the wheel, it saves a lot time. I did a site for the company I work for in this fashion.

Wordpress alone might be sufficient to earn a few bucks doing sites for local small business, but to do bigger jobs for bigger clients you'll need to understand HTML/CSS/PHP and possibly other coding languages depending on what you'll called upon to deliver.

 

[MashaN]

Hi all,

Recently joined and glad to be a part of this community.

A bit of background. It's been a turbulent three years. In this time I've become divorced, which drove me on to bring in an additional income to my generic IT job 9-5 (not a coding roles), via matched betting. This allowed me to purchase my own house shortly after the divorce went through.

The match betting value is starting to dwindle and therefore isn't sustainable long term. I'm now investigating other business possibilities, although at present I'm really struggling to think of a product/service.

I understand from reading 'Unscripted ' that one of the main cornerstones is about bringing value to others. If I'm honest one of my main motivators for becoming a successful businessman is to be able to spend time with my daughter and to be able to live near her if my ex decides to move to another part of the country. I want to be able to take her to clubs, be there in person throughout her upbringing. The idea that she won't grow up with a strong father figure in her life, frankly, scares the sh1t out of me. I want the best for her more than anything in the world and using this fear as fuel to succeed.

I'm looking at location independent roles, even considering options such as Affiliate Marketing, trading and learning to become a full time poker player. I know these go against the CENTS ethos, but at least these offer a way out of the 9-5 and give me location independence. I'm quite happy staring at a computer screen all day long, it's pretty much what I do at work all day and then matched betting for several hours each evening and more at the weekend.

I seem to lack creativity at present. Strengths include high boredom threshold, addictive/obsessive personality, very strong work ethic, (never miss a gym session, eat clean food all the time, work 9-5 where I'm a top performer, work several hours on matched betting each evening and all weekend, literally every day). My ex said to other people and me after we split that she's never met anyone else as resilient, who can focus on one thing and just keep going and going, and she's at upper management level in a government job. She did say I need to believe in myself more than I do, which I agree with. I'm also prone to analysis through paralysis through constant research and reading.

I'm considering Affiliate Marketing and the other options as I don't mind working hands on for long hours, as long as I can get out the rat race and from there maybe learn more business skills and awaken the creative part of me which hasn't been utilized for a long time now. From there look at a fastlane business.

At present I seem to be a machine/work horse with little entrepreneurial nouse, I'm sure this is something that can be worked on.

Money motivates me, I'd love to be rich - the freedom it brings and not being an employee is important.

Would be interested in what you guys think about my situation.

Thanks!

Welcome to the forum.
I'm still a bit of a newbie myself here.

I used to do match betting for a bit too. Although quickly realizing that there are not a lot of options for Canadians in terms of finding a decent exchange site, I gave it up. It was never a long-term goal for me anyway. Just to make some side cash.

What I realized that any 'side hustle' that isn't a real sustainable business can sabotage your mindset. Cause if you don't exactly believe in it yourself or if you're not in it for the long run, the grind doesn't seem to be worth it.
And even though I'm somebody who's still working a 9-5 at the moment while working on building a business afterward, but I can tell you one thing for sure, working on something that you have a vision for vs something that will just get you out of 9-5 is incomparable.
You seem to have a strong ''Why" (your daughter), so you're clearly not lacking meaning and purpose. And your work ethics seem to be in place as well. All you need is to find the right grind to put all your effort towards. Easy enough . Kidding, it's not. But will be well worth it in the end.

 

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[Rabby]

Welcome

You're providing some kind of value right now to your employer with your "generic" IT job... otherwise there probably wouldn't be a job. If you want to externalize that value-providing and develop it into an asset that is independent of your time and effort (eventually, anyway), then you may already have the start of an idea. But there are all kinds of human needs that can be served, and it almost doesn't matter which ones you go after (if they're large or broad enough needs that is). The reward is in making something that continues to provide value, to others and to you, with less and less of your direct effort. Good luck!

 

[telly123]

Welcome to the forum.
I'm still a bit of a newbie myself here.



What I realized that any 'side hustle' that isn't a real sustainable business can sabotage your mindset. Cause if you don't exactly believe in it yourself or if you're not in it for the long run, the grind doesn't seem to be worth it.
And even though I'm somebody who's still working a 9-5 at the moment while working on building a business afterward, but I can tell you one thing for sure, working on something that you have a vision for vs something that will just get you out of 9-5 is incomparable.
You seem to have a strong ''Why" (your daughter), so you're clearly not lacking meaning and purpose. And your work ethics seem to be in place as well. All you need is to find the right grind to put all your effort towards. Easy enough . Kidding, it's not. But will be well worth it in the end.

Cheers. Yep, the matched betting is losing its shine as it's not as lucrative as it was a year back. It still brings in an extra 1k or 2 a month on top of my wage, but it's more work for less money and seems to be diminishing in value as time goes on.

Feels difficult to give it up due to the money it brings in, but it's consuming most of my time outside of the 9-5, which is holding me back from establishing a proper, long term skillset and business.

In some ways it would be good to be made redundant from work, then I could matched bet for a few hours a day and work on a business the rest of the time.

 

[lowtek]

Welcome to the forum telly.

I look forward to watching your progress.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Welcome Telly, appreciate the intro. Sounds like once you pick something, you won't have a problem turning it into something.