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Being comfortable being alone

Brian Suh

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As I venture into entrepreneurship/self development, I have developed a high sense of self. It has made me realize how much I let people disrespect me and use me as a doormat without me even knowing. It is as if a tiger born into a zoo think its okay and normal for "others" to throw food when "they" find it convenient when in your DNA, you are meant to hunt a god damn huge gazelle and eat it when you please, not when others "say" you can.

Needless to say, I have seen where I have been needy in both my relationships with my family and friends and it is not pretty and I feel ashamed of my past self. It is as if a Tiger from the jungle sees a tiger in a zoo being obedient to the zoo workers. F*ck that. The tiger is meant to be free and wild. However, I find that most people are like this. They get spit on by life and they don't even know it. They don't realize they are ALIVE and that there is so much more to life then a 9-5, a white picket fence and wife and 2.5 kids.

I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable. This may sound like narcissism but it is not. Narcissism is when you think you are always right. I just really enjoy my life and the feeling in my own body of pride, content, and feeling like I am in control of my destiny.

I know that there are others like me who feel this way but our relationships will now be interdependent rather than codependent which is what many of my relationships were like. Just a little rant and thought I'd share because maybe someone else feels the same.
 

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As I venture into entrepreneurship/self development, I have developed a high sense of self. It has made me realize how much I let people disrespect me and use me as a doormat without me even knowing. It is as if a tiger born into a zoo think its okay and normal for "others" to throw food when "they" find it convenient when in your DNA, you are meant to hunt a god damn huge gazelle and eat it when you please, not when others "say" you can.

Needless to say, I have seen where I have been needy in both my relationships with my family and friends and it is not pretty and I feel ashamed of my past self. It is as if a Tiger from the jungle sees a tiger in a zoo being obedient to the zoo workers. F*ck that. The tiger is meant to be free and wild. However, I find that most people are like this. They get spit on by life and they don't even know it. They don't realize they are ALIVE and that there is so much more to life then a 9-5, a white picket fence and wife and 2.5 kids.

I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable. This may sound like narcissism but it is not. Narcissism is when you think you are always right. I just really enjoy my life and the feeling in my own body of pride, content, and feeling like I am in control of my destiny.

I know that there are others like me who feel this way but our relationships will now be interdependent rather than codependent which is what many of my relationships were like. Just a little rant and thought I'd share because maybe someone else feels the same.
I understand!

Still, it is important to have some connections with folks who support at least MOST of your principles.

It is natural for similar-thinking people to join you as time goes by, so don't worry about that being tiring!

There was an old tale about Confucius, a revered Chinese philosopher.

A man came crying to him, because his only brother was a bad gangster.

The man was afraid that his brother would one day meet his death, due to his evil deeds.

And that would leave him alone in the world.

Confucius said, 'If you are a good man with strong principles, surely people will be drawn to your virtues. Is a truly good man ever lonely, with no companions at his side?'
 

Ninjakid

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Actually, sometimes I'm worried that I'm too comfortable being alone.

I want to keep my autonomy, but sometimes I think that turns into me isolating myself. I've probably sabotaged several relationships because of this.

I'm really not sure where to draw the line...
 

Strm

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I like being alone too. Maybe even too much, I am not sure..
To just listen my own thoughts, ideas and to think about my actions and how these actions make my future.
None of my friends or family members see life or entrepreneurship the way I see or feel, so it's hard not to feel like wasting time when all I hear is how one can't wait for the nexr vacation or how "fun" is to get wasted every friday-saturday or how shitty the job or the boss is. I hope I don't sound arrogant!
 

advantagecp

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As I venture into

...I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable.
This makes me think about how closely entrepreneurship is related to being comfortable in your own skin. I am a big proponent of solo travel. As much as I love my family, there is nothing better than riding a motorcycle solo across Indochina for a few months, or hiking the Appalachian trail solo for a few months.

Always alone? Of course not, but I am totally comfortable alone. In my family there are two of us (a niece and me) who are thought to be slightly offbeat because we are completely happy and comfortable going out solo for a meal at a restaurant and a movie.
 

advantagecp

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I understand!

Still, it is important to have some connections with folks who support at least MOST of your principles.
It takes all kinds of people. In all honesty I really don't care whether people support my principles. I am comfortable with my own moral compass and my own judgment. I am always open to learning and researching, but I am not dependent upon external approval.
 

404profound

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Once you realize that most people maintain appearances out of perceived social obligation, being alone becomes the preferred option. For me, it is always a task to interact with anyone in person, with the exception of three people. But even those three and I maintain healthy distance. Alone I can read, work on my app, reflect on things and learn, research markets, etc. Around people I have to either discuss, or listen to other people discuss, pointless bullshit. There is no competition from my point of view.
 

Avalokite

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interesting read.. whatever if through choices you have made you are not alone, have kids, how would forge a head as a tiger with your Cubs in tow? life is great when you are responsible for 1 person yourself, you set the rules, you live and die by them.. when you are responsible for yourself and others .. your choices have to be different than when you are alone. you have to be a lion not a tiger.
 

rwhyan

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I'm too comfortable being alone. It is one of my weaknesses.

Focused, solo work is absolutely vital.

But equally important is direct interaction with the market, prospects, clients, etc.
 

Napoolion

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Yeah, I have felt that, I am comfortable alone, but one important thing I discovered is not to be too self absorbed either. There are many smart people out there to learn from, even if they are not seeing things the way you do. Or especially if they don't see things like you to. You should sometimes turn your focus outward to see what's going on and spot the needs and see unmet desires of other people.

Shortly it is not that great to fall in the trap of feeling superior, because so far it has always came back to bite me. Everyone wants and feels superior, is it with new iphone, clothes or even with the knowledge how it is most efficient to clean the toilet. Self awareness, analysis and open mind are quite important, as is learning how people work, otherwise being locked in your room alone does not feel like a great future either.

These are my latest discoveries at least... :)
 

Tanu1234

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As I venture into entrepreneurship/self development, I have developed a high sense of self. It has made me realize how much I let people disrespect me and use me as a doormat without me even knowing. It is as if a tiger born into a zoo think its okay and normal for "others" to throw food when "they" find it convenient when in your DNA, you are meant to hunt a god damn huge gazelle and eat it when you please, not when others "say" you can.

Needless to say, I have seen where I have been needy in both my relationships with my family and friends and it is not pretty and I feel ashamed of my past self. It is as if a Tiger from the jungle sees a tiger in a zoo being obedient to the zoo workers. F*ck that. The tiger is meant to be free and wild. However, I find that most people are like this. They get spit on by life and they don't even know it. They don't realize they are ALIVE and that there is so much more to life then a 9-5, a white picket fence and wife and 2.5 kids.

I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable. This may sound like narcissism but it is not. Narcissism is when you think you are always right. I just really enjoy my life and the feeling in my own body of pride, content, and feeling like I am in control of my destiny.

I know that there are others like me who feel this way but our relationships will now be interdependent rather than codependent which is what many of my relationships were like. Just a little rant and thought I'd share because maybe someone else feels the same.
Generally when we progress, our relationship with people change.

At some point of time, we are alone but not lonely.

We should believe in ourself our values and keep taking firm steps.

In journey, we will meet similar minded people.

It is better to walk alone than having wrong company.[emoji846]


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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GravyBoat

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As I venture into entrepreneurship/self development, I have developed a high sense of self.
Be careful with this mindset. It is a double edged sword.

I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable. This may sound like narcissism but it is not. Narcissism is when you think you are always right. I just really enjoy my life and the feeling in my own body of pride, content, and feeling like I am in control of my destiny.
This is the right mindset. Do not hate others because you think you are better. People are on a different path than you and that's okay.

Looks like you have a good head on your shoulders. Keep it up!
 
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Brian Suh

Brian Suh

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Thinking about this more and more and it seems that this is the ONLY way to grow. Everyone can tell you how to live or even how to start your own business but unless you trust your gut and go through the fire, you haven’t learned shit. Even if you did gain success, did you really? Your still the same person just following the script someone laid out for you. The best way to grow and live is to throw yourself in the fire. This is t to say you shouldn’t learn from mistakes of others, but to deny mistakes is to deny LIFE
 

Napoolion

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Very important to watch your gut, but I also see another side of it. It might make you very impulsive that kills your long term strategy and you need to extinguish some unwanted fires you did not meant to start. Your gut is not always right, neither is your analytical mind. Some people (including me) few years ago took it as an excuse do not analyse our actions enough before doing something (because, you know, I am following my gut). Gut and analytical mind should work in a pair and be great buddies.
 

404profound

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I'm too comfortable being alone. It is one of my weaknesses.

Focused, solo work is absolutely vital.

But equally important is direct interaction with the market, prospects, clients, etc.
For someone from LA that is shocking.. that's the most extroverted place I've ever seen
 

Omega

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It's vital that you develop social skills as an entrepreneur. However, there's one person you can always count on and expect what answers are going to match what questions that spring up..... It's you. People other than yourself can produce answers or move in unexpected ways that are unfamiliar to you, but that's why you develop social skills and talk to as many people as you can so you're prepared for when something unexpected happens.
 

Leo Hendrix

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Solitude allows for my inner thoughts to come up to my mind clearly, this helps me make decisions based on clear thought with the aid of intuition. Obviously I use data but many times that is simply not enough.

Solitude renews my energy and being and lets me relax for a bit knowing no one is evaluating me for whatever reason or messing with my personal energy.
 
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Brian Suh

Brian Suh

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I’ve decided to cut everyone in my life who set their sites low and are negative. This includes my dad. I can feel how he is poisoning me. No matter if he is my family, I only have one life and I won’t let anyone sabotage my chance at a great one. Call me selfish. Call me an a**hole but I will only hang with people with big visions and expect the best out of themselves and the world around them.
 
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Brian Suh

Brian Suh

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I’ve decided to cut everyone in my life who set their sites low and are negative. This includes my dad. I can feel how he is poisoning me. No matter if he is my family, I only have one life and I won’t let anyone sabotage my chance at a great one. Call me selfish. Call me an a**hole but I will only hang with people with big visions and expect the best out of themselves and the world around them.
I don’t see how people see success as this feel good positive thing. It requires you to have a hard look at yourself that can be hard and hurts. You WILL have haters that will try to bring you down actively. You will discover truths about life and human nature that is scary. Who said success was all roses? It’s thornes and hard. You will be at risk of dearh
 

Xeon

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As I venture into entrepreneurship/self development, I have developed a high sense of self. It has made me realize how much I let people disrespect me and use me as a doormat without me even knowing. It is as if a tiger born into a zoo think its okay and normal for "others" to throw food when "they" find it convenient when in your DNA, you are meant to hunt a god damn huge gazelle and eat it when you please, not when others "say" you can.

Needless to say, I have seen where I have been needy in both my relationships with my family and friends and it is not pretty and I feel ashamed of my past self. It is as if a Tiger from the jungle sees a tiger in a zoo being obedient to the zoo workers. F*ck that. The tiger is meant to be free and wild. However, I find that most people are like this. They get spit on by life and they don't even know it. They don't realize they are ALIVE and that there is so much more to life then a 9-5, a white picket fence and wife and 2.5 kids.

I used to always think lone people were losers (some of them are truly weird and messed up) but I find my own company to be very enjoyable. This may sound like narcissism but it is not. Narcissism is when you think you are always right. I just really enjoy my life and the feeling in my own body of pride, content, and feeling like I am in control of my destiny.

I know that there are others like me who feel this way but our relationships will now be interdependent rather than codependent which is what many of my relationships were like. Just a little rant and thought I'd share because maybe someone else feels the same.
Can relate. I've been getting angrier ever since I started "waking up".


Once you realize that most people maintain appearances out of perceived social obligation, being alone becomes the preferred option. For me, it is always a task to interact with anyone in person, with the exception of three people. But even those three and I maintain healthy distance. Alone I can read, work on my app, reflect on things and learn, research markets, etc. Around people I have to either discuss, or listen to other people discuss, pointless bullshit. There is no competition from my point of view.
Totally this. When I see how fake most folks are, I feel like puking.
People are able to fake laughter so much so that it actually looks and feel authentic, except it's not.
Fake rapport, fake body language, fake speech.
 

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