How much is to much?

[Banthaman]

There's probably some other thread out there like this but I just wanted to throw this out there.

I was just talking with my wife about getting involved with a pregnancy help website. We are experiencing a number of things in life with ... pretty much life in general as well as some hard actions taken against my wife's parents when it comes to the grandkids and our marriage and parenting. It's been difficult to say the least as she is far more affected than I am in that area. I am also looking at starting school next fall to finish my BS and our children are nearing the school age (my oldest in K as of next fall) to which we are intending to home school. Neither of use are ones to back down to a challenge though when it comes to the home schooling we agreed if it is hurting more than helping to explore other options.

My question is how do you know when you have all that you can handle on your plate? I refuse to make excuses for myself not to do things but how does one draw the line between being a doer and being stubborn?

 

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[Runum]

Probably you've had enough when you're asking theses questions.

When most people think of home schooling they get the mental image of them doing all the teaching to their own kids around the kitchen table. This can be both good and bad. It doesn't have to be that way. Many areas have co-ops where home school parents teach to their strengths. They may teach other kids as well as their own. The groups also schedule field trips, fine arts, and athletic stuff together. It takes some of the direct pressure off of you as a parent.

Sorry to hear about all the things straining you right now. Holidays also tend to magnify the good as well as not so good. I wish you well.:cheers:

 

[randallg99]

Runum - good point about the holidays stressing people out. Probably in best interest to just get the holidays out of the way before making life changing decisions.

maybe try the school before jumping into home schooling so you can focus on some of the other things that might need a lot of attention....

 

[yveskleinsky]

What does "getting involved with a pregnancy help website" mean?

Personally I have never been good with balance, so I am probably the wrong person to answer this. I don't like balancing a million things. I much prefer to prioritize and then cut things that aren't a priority out. For example, if you and your wife sit down and decide that your top 4 task-related priorities are homeschooling the kids, working or working your plan and each other, then you only fill up "extra" time with everything else as that time becomes available.

 

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[GoldenEggs]

I agree that if you are asking if you have too much to handle, that could mean your plate is already full.

It also sounds like that you do not have much support, atleast from family, which can make things more difficult. I second the recommendation to find a homeschooling co-op near you. Are there other familes near you that share similar parenting philosophies?

 

[AroundTheWorld]

I have lots of random thoughts about this topic... sorry if this post ends up incoherent.

A lot of times in our culture, we think that our decisions are "either - or." This line of thought can end up being limiting, or overwhelming. Rather, I've grown to think in terms of "and - also" Think about how you can integrate all parts of your life. You don't have to keep things in "compartments." If you do embark on the homeschooling adventure, you will soon discover that homeschooling becomes a part of your life and your every day activities. Your kids get integrated into your life and you find teaching moments in all you do. There will still be some focused "school time" but not nearly as much as you would initially think.

I started homeschooling my kids when I was still in college. How did I do it? The kids came with me. Back of the room, crayons, and a juice. (or, for a baby, a sling is all you need)

The book "continuum concept" ([ame]http://www.amazon.com/Continuum-Concept-Happiness-Classics-Development/dp/0201050714/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1228442586&sr=1-1[/ame]) was really influential for me in this line of thought. It is about a tribe somewhere in South America and how they raise their children. Essentially, the kids become absorbed into the lives of the adults, rather than the adults stopping their life in order to totally focus on the child.


Another random thought: The following quote came from a homeschooling book I read about a year into the homeschool journey... and it always helps me if I am thinking of taking on one more thing:

Live your life in chapters. You don't have to accomplish everything in this chapter of raising children.
~ A Well Trained Mind

As Yves mentioned... list your top priorities. Bring your kids into your life. They are capable of understanding much more than we give them credit for. Then, if you notice you have taken on too much, remember that you can live your life in chapters - - and some of your "things" can be delayed until the next chapter.

 

[BeingChewsie]

I'm not sure where you live but there are some really great options out there for homeschooling that can ease some of the "time" factor for parents, including online charter school/public schools that the kids can advance through at their own pace.

www.k12.com has both online public schools, online private schools, and consumer purchased products for home schooling.

Sue

 

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