Afraid to spend

[Perry Rico]

Hi Guys,

I would like to share that I had reached my goal for 2015 and is on the right track to reach again my next milestone for 2016. ever since then I had a problem, I am afraid to spend a money to even reward my self.

The problem I am encountering right now and I wanna know if it is normal or I am overdoing it is that it seems like "I am afraid to spend money". Not sure if this is normal, I just want to keep them:
- I am afraid to buy house, I prefer to rent and keep the cash
- I am afraid to buy car, I prefer to use my car till the wheels went off.
- I am afraid to even buy a "cool mountain bike", I just wana keep the money
- I am afraid to spend on travel, i ended up keeping the money as well.

Though I like to do all of the above, I ended up not spending every single cent. I keep 50% of my income to bank.

My question is simple, am I over doing it? or everyone here does the same way and this is the path to richness?

I keep the money so I can always finance a business I want should an opportunity comes. Though I already have my small startup, I still save money to build someday a unicorn startup

Any advice guys? again I just wanted to know if this is normal? I am the person where everyone had already spend a cash in a given situation and I will be the last to shed a cash and that happen even months after everyone had spent a cash.

 

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[Aleksandra88]

I don't know if it's normal to do so, but I can assure you that you're not the only one. I don't earn much, but I have huge savings just because if I didn't I'd be stressed. Probably the sky would fell if I bought something that isn't a necessity

 

[PureA]

I was totally like this too, however, decreasingly so... I never knew if it was a healthy or unhealthy relationship with money. I try to practice an abundance mindset.

It has changed the way I go about business too.

For example losing £10k in a failing business - the thought made me shiver.

But now I view it as only money.

I mean don't get me wrong I don't spend money on crap I don't need, but if I were to lose that £10k it's rather... meh.

I think it comes down to, at it's core, about detaching your self worth from your net worth.

Know that you will be the same incredible guy with the same incredible gifts to offer the world - regardless of the number on that screen.

Sam Walton was known to be very frugal, and he did OK. I wouldn't worry about it too much!

 

[jon.a]

You are not normal. You are living beneath your means. Normal people don't do that. Only a few of us here do that. Keep it up.
Step two is to find an income stream that covers your nut passively.

 

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[mws87]

My question is simple, am I over doing it?

Not at all. This is what happens when you develop a different mindset and view money differently than the 99%. I'm the same exact way with spending as I'm sure a lot of us here are. Once you drop the habit of instant-gratification and start viewing money as a tool, you want to spend less of it.

Next time someone flaunts their flashy gadgets and $200 shoes, bragging about their awesome material possessions, ask them what their return is from buying it, then smile when they draw a blank

Hell, I remember a time when I NEEDED some new threads. Went into the store, looked at clothes for an hour, left with a belt--a cheap one at that. Ha.

 

[jon.a]

I'd buy used clothes if Mrs jon would let me.

 

[wade1mil]

I try to practice an abundance mindset.

Agree with PureA. Sounds like you see money as scarce rather than abundant (as do I, and I'm working on changing that). Having this mindset can cause you to save money instead of develop, market, improve, and/or advertise your product. You don't spend money because you're scared to lose it.

For example... I created a card game and was scared to spend money advertising it. I slowly got exposure using free or very inexpensive methods of marketing, but when it came time to pay for advertising, I stopped. I spend $50-100 on ads and got worse results than the free marketing I was doing. What should happen, is I should learn from the data, improve the marketing concepts, update the ad, and continually improve until it's profitable. But since I'm afraid of losing the money, I resort to free marketing. This limits my potential. I could approach someone with a large following and give them $10k to promote the game, but that's a huge risk for someone who sees money as scarce. Others have done this exact think and generated million in profit with the same type of product. If I had $100k in the bank, I'd be more likely to pay the $10k because there is "more where that comes from."

 

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[Newpollz]

You just know too much about money and how it can make someone suffer that you wanna hold on to it. Paradoxally you need to let it go if you want to keep your sanity. As long as you're not a spendthrift on the path of becoming blameworthy and in severe poverty, enjoy it my friend.

 

[Rigged]

Oh thank god it's not just me. I am driving a subaru 99 rust box I bought with one paycheck when I first moved to the US two years ago. Currently I have money to buy 15 such cars but I still drive it lol.
Very happy I am not having mental problems.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[P3HSB]

I suffer from this too. When I started my journey of making money online, I was only making pennies. The money was so damn hard to make I didn't even want to spend it. I just recently got my first job on January 1st and I have yet to spend a dime besides for gas. So far I just took the money and put it in my investment accounts. However, I do feel deprived.

 

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[drifter]

..just don't forget to live and enjoy what life has to offer. Life can change / be over in an instant - I threw money out the window at times (still do at times on things I -WANT-) but that being said, I love my life.

As long as you can say that, carry on.

 

[Silverhawk851]

What my main metric on spending is
I look at ROI of spend rather than cost,
be it in knowledge, financial, emotional, spiritual
and above all, ROTI (return on time invested)

I agree with living below your means,
and a person who has money saved up is a million times more relaxed and at peace than someone who doesn't have any.
Being prepared when an opportunity comes around is critical.

HOWEVER....

..I think that one should never be completely reliant on the money,
to where it is affecting you emotionally to spend any x amount.

Because there WILL come a day,
where you will lose it all.

And I learnt this out of experience.

Because it's life.
And things can and will go wrong. Murphy is always around the corner.
Car stops working. A Legal issue. Partner runs off with the money.
Campaigns crash. Clients leave. Suppliers shut down.
It's life.

What then?
Are you destroyed because you were heavily attached to that bank account which is now gone?

Or do you realize that money is simply a outcome of the value you provided?
The key denominator is YOU. You created it.
You can always create more.

Just taking the emotions out of external things: things which you cannot change,
back to Internal: What IS in my control and what I CAN change.
Thoughts, actions, habits. Resilience. Persistence.


TL;DR
-Spend if it increases quality of life
-Do not look at Cost, look at ROI
-Do not attach your emotions with your bank amount, it is not forever
-Become 'outcome-independent' and 'experience-oriented'

 

[TonyStark]

It's not normal but that's because you're extraordinary. Don't spend money just because you feel you have to. Save it!

Why not try reinvesting it back into your business?

 

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[Madhu]

I suffer really badly from being afraid to spend.

On the plus side, I have zero debt.

On the down side, I've missed out on opportunities and frequently use my time in effectively (by doing tasks that I could pay someone else to do).

I've been reading books about the power of thought, and they say being afraid to spend in this way acts as a money repellent.

Here is how I am dealing with it:

1) Find an account that pays high interest.
This is really hard because banks don't seem to want our money, but I've found one that pays £5 a month of interest. I am trying to form the habit of spending this money on my business. Because it is interest, it seems easier to do. When I spend it, I make a note of the benefits from spending which also makes it easier to get over the fear of spending.

2) Make plans for spending
I'm making a list of all the things I would like to buy or invest in. Then I spend time researching them. In some ways this is just a form of procrastination. But in other ways, I have become a little bit more confident about spending and have got a few things that have helped my business (which I would have normally avoided). It's slow progress, but it is progress.

I think it's just one of those things that you have to take step-by-step. As long as you are making small progress, then things will improve.
I also suppose it's better to in a position of spending too little than spending too much.

I think in my case, the problem is that I don't have reliable regular income yet. I think once I can fix that spending will be easier.

 

[PureA]

Kinda related, something I think helped me getting over my 'fear to spend'.

10:00 - 10:13

 

[Kelly C]

Hell, I remember a time when I NEEDED some new threads. Went into the store, looked at clothes for an hour, left with a belt--a cheap one at that. Ha.

I have a real pride in sourcing my clothes on ebay and scoring things for under £5 plus postage (new or used). It has really skewed my view on clothing in shops etc now though. I couldn't imagine spending £40 quid on new jeans or £120 when I can get same jeans on ebay for NEW (or used) for a fiver.

Recently saw an article about capsule wardrobes (while looking at minimalism as I just hate stuff anyway)...which is apparently a minimalistic wardrobe made up of *only* 37 pieces of clothing. I don't have any where near 37 pieces! I'd have to add to my collection lol.

 

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[wade1mil]

I suffer really badly from being afraid to spend.

"I choose to be afraid to spend."
FTFY

 

[GuestUser140]

You are not normal. You are living beneath your means. Normal people don't do that. Only a few of us here do that. Keep it up.
Step two is to find an income stream that covers your nut passively.

This x 100.

Don't spend now. Save your money. Make a rule for yourself, live on 10% of your income or whatever works for you. Focus on increasing that income.

Once you have a couple hundred thousand in the bank, you can put (some of) that capital to work in simple income producing assets and have a small taste of what a "money tree" is. Getting interest on your capital, without lifting a finger, and then going out and spending some of that interest, is one of the finer things in life. Few things come close.

Keep it up.

 

[Perry Rico]

You are not normal. You are living beneath your means. Normal people don't do that. Only a few of us here do that. Keep it up.
Step two is to find an income stream that covers your nut passively.

Hi Jon, you are always there to give advice when I got the urge to spend. thank you

 

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[Perry Rico]

Not at all. This is what happens when you develop a different mindset and view money differently than the 99%. I'm the same exact way with spending as I'm sure a lot of us here are. Once you drop the habit of instant-gratification and start viewing money as a tool, you want to spend less of it.

Next time someone flaunts their flashy gadgets and $200 shoes, bragging about their awesome material possessions, ask them what their return is from buying it, then smile when they draw a blank

Hell, I remember a time when I NEEDED some new threads. Went into the store, looked at clothes for an hour, left with a belt--a cheap one at that. Ha.

thank you for your advise, sometimes I feel cheap amongst others who are flashing their yeah 400 usd shoes, and latest cars. my motivation simply goes up knowing that i'd rather have savings than debt in the bank

 

[Perry Rico]

Oh thank god it's not just me. I am driving a subaru 99 rust box I bought with one paycheck when I first moved to the US two years ago. Currently I have money to buy 15 such cars but I still drive it lol.
Very happy I am not having mental problems.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

thank you for securing that I dont have mental problem

 

[Perry Rico]

What my main metric on spending is
I look at ROI of spend rather than cost,
be it in knowledge, financial, emotional, spiritual
and above all, ROTI (return on time invested)

I agree with living below your means,
and a person who has money saved up is a million times more relaxed and at peace than someone who doesn't have any.
Being prepared when an opportunity comes around is critical.

HOWEVER....

..I think that one should never be completely reliant on the money,
to where it is affecting you emotionally to spend any x amount.

Because there WILL come a day,
where you will lose it all.

And I learnt this out of experience.

Because it's life.
And things can and will go wrong. Murphy is always around the corner.
Car stops working. A Legal issue. Partner runs off with the money.
Campaigns crash. Clients leave. Suppliers shut down.
It's life.

What then?
Are you destroyed because you were heavily attached to that bank account which is now gone?

Or do you realize that money is simply a outcome of the value you provided?
The key denominator is YOU. You created it.
You can always create more.

Just taking the emotions out of external things: things which you cannot change,
back to Internal: What IS in my control and what I CAN change.
Thoughts, actions, habits. Resilience. Persistence.


TL;DR
-Spend if it increases quality of life
-Do not look at Cost, look at ROI
-Do not attach your emotions with your bank amount, it is not forever
-Become 'outcome-independent' and 'experience-oriented'

This is very inspiring. I printed this in my desk to remind me

 

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[Perry Rico]

What my main metric on spending is
I look at ROI of spend rather than cost,
be it in knowledge, financial, emotional, spiritual
and above all, ROTI (return on time invested)

I agree with living below your means,
and a person who has money saved up is a million times more relaxed and at peace than someone who doesn't have any.
Being prepared when an opportunity comes around is critical.

HOWEVER....

..I think that one should never be completely reliant on the money,
to where it is affecting you emotionally to spend any x amount.

Because there WILL come a day,
where you will lose it all.

And I learnt this out of experience.

Because it's life.
And things can and will go wrong. Murphy is always around the corner.
Car stops working. A Legal issue. Partner runs off with the money.
Campaigns crash. Clients leave. Suppliers shut down.
It's life.

What then?
Are you destroyed because you were heavily attached to that bank account which is now gone?

Or do you realize that money is simply a outcome of the value you provided?
The key denominator is YOU. You created it.
You can always create more.

Just taking the emotions out of external things: things which you cannot change,
back to Internal: What IS in my control and what I CAN change.
Thoughts, actions, habits. Resilience. Persistence.


TL;DR
-Spend if it increases quality of life
-Do not look at Cost, look at ROI
-Do not attach your emotions with your bank amount, it is not forever
-Become 'outcome-independent' and 'experience-oriented'

This is very inspiring. I printed this in my desk to remind me

 

[Perry Rico]

thats m

It's not normal but that's because you're extraordinary. Don't spend money just because you feel you have to. Save it!

Why not try reinvesting it back into your business?

thats a good point, my problem is my business does not require capital or not much its a software service business.

 

[StevieB]

I agree with what many other's have posted but I would reconsider purchasing a home. While there may be up front costs you can get much of that money back as opposed to renting you will never see any of it.

Also you could consider purchasing a passive income generating duplex/quadplex and live in one of the units.

 

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[Jon L]

I agree with what many other's have posted but I would reconsider purchasing a home. While there may be up front costs you can get much of that money back as opposed to renting you will never see any of it.

Also you could consider purchasing a passive income generating duplex/quadplex and live in one of the units.

there are a ton of other expenses that go along with owning a home that most people never consider - #1 is the temptation to upgrade. You can spend endless amounts on landscaping, granite countertops, even water softeners. .... just keep that in mind.

I really like what MJ says in his book about only increasing your spending by 10% of the increase in income you're generating. THAT is a way to build wealth fast.

 

[CLE]

My wife and I have never been further ahead in our lives. Our home which is worth about $250K is $23K from being paid off because we make bulk payments on the principal balance regularly. Unless something strange happens we will be debt free in about one year. She used to make about 80K a year and we spent more than we really should have on things. Despite decent pay for someone with a just GED her job sucked, bad hours, treated poorly, etc. The final straw was December 23rd last year when they accused her of wrong doing that was false. She stressed out terribly. I told to tell put in her notice and leave. She thought I was nuts to suggest she walk away from a decent paying job but she did it anyway. I got her setup with new job before she was finished and even though the starting pay is more like $45K a year she has basically zero stress and twice as much spare time on her hands. To me the quality of life was well worth the loss in pay. We adjusted our spending buy eating out less and instead of buying new vehicles every couple years we will make them last more like 12 years now. If we hadn't been somewhat frugal and paid the house down a bunch she would have been less likely to leave her shitty job. The spending adjustment hasn't really bothered us that much, we were eating out too much anyway.

 

[Hong King Kong]

Hey man I used to have this problem too.

Until I realized it stemmed from a deeper false belief... a belief that money is HARD to come by.

Probably learned it as a kid, seeing my mom clip coupons, buying shitty brand name food to save a few bucks.

This limits your potential, you'll spend less on advertising, less on learning, and ultimately price your products less.

Begin to think money is everywhere, every broke kid buys $500 jordans every now and then, everybody gets it.

From here you'll begin to spend more, price higher, and you'll get more... happened to me anyways.

 

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[DrkSide]

Since I started my business my income is over 10x what I used to make at my job. In that same time my spending has actually gone down since I no longer commute to work or have the associated costs. My level of happiness has gone up with the extra income even without spending any of it. I have found the option to buy things is actually normally better than buying them.

I am trying to reach a position of "F*ck You" which John Goodman can put better than I can.

Personal spending is separate from business spending though. If the ROI is there for business I have no problem spending the money.

 

[Perry Rico]

your input guys made me feel better. now i know that I am not normal, and there are lots of guys here who are not normal as well. a species of the same kind. We had chosen this path that not a regular person would do.