Tormented by Procrastination and Doubt, Advice?

[LibertyForMe]

When I get overwhelmed by having a lot of things to do, or a monumental task in front of me, I shut down. For me to make progress, I have to break it up into small manageable pieces that aren't scary.

Also, a lot of the time the task only seems monumental because I haven't defined exactly what the task is. The mystery and fear of the unknown make it seem worse than it actually is. Once I say "OK, what is the exact thing I need to do with this." I usually feel a lot better and take action.

Another thing that I have learned is that I need to get some 'small' wins under my belt before I try to get a home run. I was listening to @snowbank s Forever Jobless podcast, and they were talking about this in the last few days. They mentioned that sometimes Home Runs are as easy to hit as Singles, but most people are scared to try and swing for a home run. For me, I realize this, and in my brain I feel like I am capable of swinging for a home run; but in reality, trying something that big with no real 'wins' under my belt would intimidate me and ultimately cause me to fail.

Right now, I am working on a business where there is PROVEN demand. This gives me one less thing to worry about, because I know people are doing business in this area all the time. I don't have any doubts at all whether anyone will want what I am offering. Now all I have to focus on is how to make my offer stand above the rest. This has been really helpful for me.

I also COMMITTED to my idea for an entire year. 12 solid months. I have mentally braced myself to stick with this idea, even if I lose money on advertising every single month. Why? Because I need the disciple of not getting distracted by side ideas. When it gets tough, and it will, I need to have committed myself to sticking with this idea, and seeing it through. I will learn WAY more by 'failing' every month and losing ad spend on a bad campaign than I would chasing three different random ideas in the span of a year. This will make me get better at actually executing and not action faking.

Hope this helps you some!

 

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[joocenasty]

Hypothetical...

1) Your arm has been chopped off and it has been put in a cooler of ice.
2) You have a chance to retrieve your arm and have it reattached, hence saving your normal life.
3) Problem is, your arm is 15 miles away and the ice is melting. Once the ice melts, your arm is gone forever.
4) You have approximately 2 hour to get your arm, otherwise the ice melts.
5) You have no gas. Only a peddle bike.

Question, under these scenarios... would you have a problem finding motivation? Would you be on a forum asking, "Gee, should I get on the bike and peddle?"

Of course not.

The lesson here? You WHY/REASONS aren't strong enough. You have chosen comfort instead.

holy shit the metaphor is strong with this, now I feel like a dingus.

Thanks a lot to all of you, I decided to save my arm so Im peddling pretty fast here


I've been choosing comfort/ the easy way over everything my entire life, you've all just pointed that out to me, and this really struck it home.

 

[Jam Wheel]

I am tormented by the same fears myself and typically have to put myself in precarious positions in order to achieve something substantial that I expect from myself. All the mental angst and worry I generate along the way, instead of just DOING IT, could power a small town.

To get my a$$ moving on my goals of entrepreneurship and wealth I purposely took myself out of a comfortable, but settled position that wasn't what I wanted in life, and threw myself (and boyfriend) into one hell of a situation where we have been living out of a suitcase for the entire year across two countries, mostly sleeping on my friend's floor. First half of the year it was fine...but do you know how uncomfortable that floor is getting now? Or the events and things I want to do in 2015 (concerts, travel, hell, even another masters degree next fall) that I can't do unless I hustle my a$$ off now to plant and fertilize that money tree.

I figure I needed to hit bottom in order to cleanse myself of long-ingrained slowlane expectations of career/career accomplishment/status etc. That finally happened last month and this month its been full steam ahead, one foot in front of the other, giving myself time (but not too much) to research and plan and we are about to move forward here shortly (this weekend). I have to admit I am feeling much more in control and happy than I have in years. Its a very nice feeling that I hope is addictive and keeps me focused on the entrepreneurial way.

 

[RogueInnovation]

Self blame holds you back.

Do things that will make you believe in yourself.
Tighten your habits, reconsider all your words, read between the lines of all the lessons in your life.

Over time you can develop an enduring sense of self worth, and begin to combat the fear.
And at that point you'll be tested.

If you saved enough snap in your step to pull out the victory, you'll grow into a fine businessman.

MJ says you don't have a strong enough reason, and chose complacency, and while its true, its kinda static (an eagle eye view that sees every ant moving super slow).
you have to respect yourself AND challenge yourself. Sometimes the respect part gets brushed under the rug cuz its hard to communicate urgency of the level you really need.

Imagine yelling at a slow crippled ant that has 100m to go.
You don't tell him its ok, so he plops down and dies, you keep screamin at him until he drags his cripple a## the whole way

But make no mistake the 100m is built from self respect


Fail the leap to success 100 000 times, and you will either break, or break your limits

But better than failure as a teacher is effort, because it stops you going in circles

 

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[jarecki]

Take the NoFap Challenge. It'll probably impact your life more than anything.

 

[joocenasty]

Take the NoFap Challenge. It'll probably impact your life more than anything.

all that does is make me extremely randy, extremely. lol

 

[DennisD]

Your freakin hilarious. I Googled "Just do it" for the express purpose of finding THIS EXACT IMAGE AND POSTING IT.

However, this is what I settled on:

 

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[jarecki]

all that does is make me extremely randy, extremely. lol

Doesn't matter till day #90

 

[AndrewNC]

They say that 40% of your day consists of habits and you can't find the solution to the problem in the same state of mind that is created.

So you have two choices here:

1. Continue to do what you have been doing, and get the results that you have always gotten up until this point in your life, or
2. Try something new, and experience a different outcome.

The 3 months before the police academy, i slept until 1, didnt have a job, and was lazy. Day 1 of the police academy, i woke up at 5 am for the hour long commute.

I woke up at 5, drove to the academy, and worked all day. Four months later, we were all at the best shape of our lives, and graduated the program.

It wasn't the 4 months of training/screwing up/getting yelled at/studying/PT that made us successful.

It was doing something that we havent done before.

Waking up at 5 am and getting in my car changed the ENTIRE DAY for all of us. No snacking on chips at 2 pm.

What positive benefit are you getting from procrastination? (don't say none..because there is some positive feeling you get)

Change the "trigger event" of the habit. What can you do FIRST THING in the morning that will change your day. For me it was as simple as making my bed and cleaning my room every morning.

What productive actions can you take throughout the day to get the SAME feeling you got from procrastination?

 

[ahQ]

I am suffering from the same problem... Like many said, I guess the WHY just isn't strong enough for me as I am too complacent in my comfort zone. I do have happy family, some passive income from rental properties, enjoying life with family & friends, and travel....and __okay job & pay__, BUT I know I want to be out of "job" and creating something meaningful and useful for others, and make an impact to many others.

But I realised that I spent more time reading online, for research & pleasure, often distracted and spent hours online without any productive thing done.

I really need to break from this comfort feeling... any suggestion?

Other than the WHY, I think it is equally important to have good habit (turn good/productive activities into habit). I wonder if doing "tracking" of how we spend time will help. This is like in personal finance, the very first step is to know how you spend you money and then do a budget and track against the budget. Would such tracking be useful at all?

 

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[Journey2Million$]

Try spending 24 hours doing nothing but work, eat, sleep, and any other important things that can't wait. Use FocalFilter to block any web sites you frequent. When you get tired of sitting, you can lay down and read a work related book or watch training videos or listen to a work related audio book.