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The Epiphany That Can Change Your Life

Anything related to matters of the mind

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ChrisGav

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WARNING: THIS POST WILL BE LONG. BUT I HOPE IT WILL HELP YOU. IF YOU ARE LOOKING TO DO THE STEPS BELOW, I STRONGLY RECOMMEND YOU GRAB A PIECE OF PAPER AND WRITE OUT THE QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.

I was reading the book: Allen Car's easyway to quit smoking. I have been smoking / vaping for about 4 years now and wanted to quit.

As I was reading the book, it dawned on me that the total point of the book was to shift your mind into believing that by quitting smoking you were not sacrificing anything, but in fact gaining everything. To rid yourself of the brainwashing that you cannot do life without nicotine.


THIS POST IS NOT ABOUT QUITTING NICOTINE, but about taking these strategies to quitting all bad habits and addictions.

The book goes on to discuss the illusions of craving nicotine and how the "withdrawal" symptoms were simply caused by the previous cigarette you smoked.

And so the epiphany began.

I was taking a freezing cold shower this morning as I normally do and thought on this philosophy. Then it hit me.

YOU ARE ONLY SACRIFICING IF IT IS SOMETHING YOU CRAVE.

Seems obvious right? I don't believe that I am sacrificing by not doing heroin, as it is something I don't crave and have never done.

As I recently made a post about quitting video games and how consuming they were, I thought of how this philosophy that can cause you to quit something physically and mentally addicting such as nicotine, how could it transfer to something like entertainment which is only mentally addicting?

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

You don't have to sacrifice for your dreams. The idea of such is an illusion. I don't have to sacrifice entertainment for my dreams. I don't have to sacrifice video games, or T.V., or time with friends to be successful. IT IS THE OPPOSITE.

I AM SACRIFICING BY PLAYING VIDEO GAMES, WATCHING TV, OR HANGING OUT WITH FRIENDS.

I crave success, I crave freedom, and I crave a life on my terms. By doing something other than pursuing this, I am in turn, sacrificing.

By engaging in such time-wasting activities, then you are sacrificing.

Your dreams do not require sacrifice, in fact, doing anything other than pursuing your dreams is sacrificing your dreams.

Although it seems a little weird, and backwards, what I realized was astonishing. I realized how video games, or other bad habits are simply an illusion.

HOW TO BREAK YOUR BAD HABITS AND THEIR ILLUSIONS:

I am going to take my bad habit of video games, and show you how I rid them from life entirely. Feel free to insert any bad habits you may be looking to rid yourself of, in place of video games in this example. All of these steps follow the principles of the book on how to stop smoking, but I recognized how it correlated to every facet in our lives.



1. The first thing I did was break down why I played video games (or insert bad habit).

Every time I felt an urge to play a game, I asked myself: why? The essential reason in this instance was, when I feel a lack of direction on what to do next, I feel the urge to play video games.
The illusion of video games:
"they are fun" "they are relaxing"
In fact they are not fun. The only reason we view entertainment as "fun" is because it relieves the uncomfortable feelings of reality. When I feel uncertain on what steps to take next, by playing video games, I am numbing out from reality, and therefore removing the uncomfortable feeling that reality gave me. Ultimately, it is not that video games are entertaining, it is that the remove you from the reality of your current negative feelings making you believe that they are "relaxing" or "fun".

2. Next, I broke down whether or not video games (or insert bad habit) were fixing the problem.

As stated above, the problem in my instance, was feeling a lack of direction on what I should be doing with my time. Are video games fixing this problem?

No, in fact they enhance it incredibly. Video games are a rabbit hole of energy, time, money, and where real life dreams go to die. All time, energy, and money spent on said activities are robbing me of the resources I could be using to fix the problem that lied beneath the behavior.
After playing video games and coming back to reality, I am left with the same "lost" feelings I had, and worse, the negative feelings of wasting my time on such activities. This in turn, perpetuates the need to continue playing. Playing to escape the negative feelings, to give the false illusion of pleasure.

3. The most important step. Recognize that you are not depriving yourself by giving up this behavior, you are enhancing yourself.

This was the "epiphany". This is what tied it all together.
By giving up video games, I'm not depriving myself. Hell, I'm not even sacrificing anything, because are not what I ultimately desire. I am only sacrificing by playing video games, because my dreams are what I ultimately desire.

The key to kicking a bad habit, is to recognize that you are not giving up anything, you are just gaining everything.
Whether it's going on a diet, ending procrastination, getting rid of time-wasting activities, or smoking, the common barrier to giving up these habits is the feeling that we are losing something. When we want to go on a diet, we start off by feeling like we are losing all the foods we "love". When I tried giving up video games in the past, I felt as if I was losing a past time that I "love".

The opposite could not be more true. What made this epiphany powerful was not because of what I consciously knew. It was, like all epiphanies, powerful because when I knew, became something I believed and felt.


I hope this post can somehow help someone who is struggling with habits they are wanting to change. It is difficult for me to articulate how I did it, as the most important part is it becoming a belief, not just something you consciously recognize.

The primary mindset shift was my belief that I had to sacrifice things to become successful. But in reality, I am only sacrificing my desires by not becoming successful.

Please feel free to ask any questions so I can better explain. This was difficult to write between my excitement, being able to articulate it, and finding a way to word it that made sense.
 
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XESPOPH: VJOT QUTV XOMM CI MUPH. CAV O JUQI OV XOMM JIMQ ZUA. OG ZUA ESI MUULOPH VU FU VJI TVIQT CIMUX, O TVSUPHMZ SIDUNNIPF ZUA HSEC E QOIDI UG QEQIS EPF XSOVI UAV VJI RAITVOUPT EPF EPTXIST.

O xet siefoph vji cuul: Emmip Des't ietzxez vu raov tnuloph. O jewi ciip tnuloph / weqoph gus ecuav 4 ziest pux epf xepvif vu raov.

Et O xet siefoph vji cuul, ov fexpif up ni vjev vji vuvem quopv ug vji cuul xet vu tjogv zuas nopf opvu cimoiwoph vjev cz raovvoph tnuloph zua xisi puv tedsogodoph epzvjoph, cav op gedv heopoph iwiszvjoph. Vu sof zuastimg ug vji cseopxetjoph vjev zua deppuv fu mogi xovjuav poduvopi.


VJOT QUTV OT PUV ECUAV RAOVVOPH PODUVOPI, cav ecuav veloph vjiti tvsevihoit vu raovvoph emm cef jecovt epf effodvoupt.

Vji cuul huit up vu fotdatt vji ommatoupt ug dsewoph poduvopi epf jux vji "xovjfsexem" tznqvunt xisi tonqmz deatif cz vji qsiwouat dohesivvi zua tnulif.

Epf tu vji iqoqjepz cihep.

O xet veloph e gsiiboph dumf tjuxis vjot nuspoph et O pusnemmz fu epf vjuahjv up vjot qjomutuqjz. Vjip ov jov ni.

ZUA ESI UPMZ TEDSOGODOPH OG OV OT TUNIVJOPH ZUA DSEWI.

Tiint ucwouat sohjv? O fup'v cimoiwi vjev O en tedsogodoph cz puv fuoph jisuop, et ov ot tunivjoph O fup'v dsewi epf jewi piwis fupi.

Et O sidipvmz nefi e qutv ecuav raovvoph wofiu henit epf jux duptanoph vjiz xisi, O vjuahjv ug jux vjot qjomutuqjz vjev dep deati zua vu raov tunivjoph qjztodemmz epf nipvemmz effodvoph tadj et poduvopi, jux duamf ov vseptgis vu tunivjoph moli ipvisveopnipv xjodj ot upmz nipvemmz effodvoph?

Vjip ov jov ni moli e vup ug csodlt.

Zua fup'v jewi vu tedsogodi gus zuas fsient. Vji ofie ug tadj ot ep ommatoup. O fup'v jewi vu tedsogodi ipvisveopnipv gus nz fsient. O fup'v jewi vu tedsogodi wofiu henit, us V.W., us voni xovj gsoipft vu ci taddittgam. OV OT VJI UQQUTOVI.

O EN TEDSOGODOPH CZ QMEZOPH WOFIU HENIT, XEVDJOPH VW, US JEPHOPH UAV XOVJ GSOIPFT.

O dsewi tadditt, O dsewi gsiifun, epf O dsewi e mogi up nz visnt. Cz fuoph tunivjoph uvjis vjep qastaoph vjot, O en op vasp, tedsogodoph.

Cz iphehoph op tadj voni-xetvoph edvowovoit, vjip zua esi tedsogodoph.

Zuas fsient fu puv siraosi tedsogodi, op gedv, fuoph epzvjoph uvjis vjep qastaoph zuas fsient ot tedsogodoph zuas fsient.

Emvjuahj ov tiint e movvmi xiosf, epf cedlxesft, xjev O siemobif xet etvupotjoph. O siemobif jux wofiu henit, us uvjis cef jecovt esi tonqmz ep ommatoup.

JUX VU CSIEL ZUAS CEF JECOVT EPF VJIOS OMMATOUPT:

O en huoph vu veli nz cef jecov ug wofiu henit, epf tjux zua jux O sof vjin gsun mogi ipvosimz. Giim gsii vu optisv epz cef jecovt zua nez ci muuloph vu sof zuastimg ug, op qmedi ug wofiu henit op vjot iyenqmi. Emm ug vjiti tviqt gummux vji qsopdoqmit ug vji cuul up jux vu tvuq tnuloph, cav O siduhpobif jux ov dussimevif vu iwisz gediv op uas mowit.



1. Vji gostv vjoph O fof xet csiel fuxp xjz O qmezif wofiu henit (us optisv cef jecov).

Iwisz voni O gimv ep ashi vu qmez e heni, O etlif nztimg: xjz? Vji ittipvoem sietup op vjot optvepdi xet, xjip O giim e medl ug fosidvoup up xjev vu fu piyv, O giim vji ashi vu qmez wofiu henit.
Vji ommatoup ug wofiu henit:
"vjiz esi gap" "vjiz esi simeyoph"
Op gedv vjiz esi puv gap. Vji upmz sietup xi woix ipvisveopnipv et "gap" ot cideati ov simoiwit vji apdungusvecmi giimopht ug siemovz. Xjip O giim apdisveop up xjev tviqt vu veli piyv, cz qmezoph wofiu henit, O en pancoph uav gsun siemovz, epf vjisigusi sinuwoph vji apdungusvecmi giimoph vjev siemovz hewi ni. Amvonevimz, ov ot puv vjev wofiu henit esi ipvisveopoph, ov ot vjev vji sinuwi zua gsun vji siemovz ug zuas dassipv pihevowi giimopht neloph zua cimoiwi vjev vjiz esi "simeyoph" us "gap".

2. Piyv, O csuli fuxp xjivjis us puv wofiu henit (us optisv cef jecov) xisi goyoph vji qsucmin.

Et tvevif ecuwi, vji qsucmin op nz optvepdi, xet giimoph e medl ug fosidvoup up xjev O tjuamf ci fuoph xovj nz voni. Esi wofiu henit goyoph vjot qsucmin?

Pu, op gedv vjiz ipjepdi ov opdsifocmz. Wofiu henit esi e seccov jumi ug ipishz, voni, nupiz, epf xjisi siem mogi fsient hu vu foi. Emm voni, ipishz, epf nupiz tqipv up teof edvowovoit esi succoph ni ug vji situasdit O duamf ci atoph vu goy vji qsucmin vjev moif cipievj vji cijewous.
Egvis qmezoph wofiu henit epf dunoph cedl vu siemovz, O en migv xovj vji teni "mutv" giimopht O jef, epf xusti, vji pihevowi giimopht ug xetvoph nz voni up tadj edvowovoit. Vjot op vasp, qisqivaevit vji piif vu dupvopai qmezoph. Qmezoph vu itdeqi vji pihevowi giimopht, vu howi vji gemti ommatoup ug qmietasi.

3. Vji nutv onqusvepv tviq. Siduhpobi vjev zua esi puv fiqsowoph zuastimg cz howoph aq vjot cijewous, zua esi ipjepdoph zuastimg.

Vjot xet vji "iqoqjepz". Vjot ot xjev voif ov emm vuhivjis.
Cz howoph aq wofiu henit, O'n puv fiqsowoph nztimg. Jimm, O'n puv iwip tedsogodoph epzvjoph, cideati esi puv xjev O amvonevimz fitosi. O en upmz tedsogodoph cz qmezoph wofiu henit, cideati nz fsient esi xjev O amvonevimz fitosi.

Vji liz vu lodloph e cef jecov, ot vu siduhpobi vjev zua esi puv howoph aq epzvjoph, zua esi katv heopoph iwiszvjoph.
Xjivjis ov't huoph up e foiv, ipfoph qsudsetvopevoup, hivvoph sof ug voni-xetvoph edvowovoit, us tnuloph, vji dunnup cessois vu howoph aq vjiti jecovt ot vji giimoph vjev xi esi mutoph tunivjoph. Xjip xi xepv vu hu up e foiv, xi tvesv ugg cz giimoph moli xi esi mutoph emm vji guuft xi "muwi". Xjip O vsoif howoph aq wofiu henit op vji qetv, O gimv et og O xet mutoph e qetv voni vjev O "muwi".

Vji uqqutovi duamf puv ci nusi vsai. Xjev nefi vjot iqoqjepz quxisgam xet puv cideati ug xjev O duptdouatmz lpix. Ov xet, moli emm iqoqjepoit, quxisgam cideati xjip O lpix, cideni tunivjoph O cimoiwif epf gimv.


O juqi vjot qutv dep tunijux jimq tuniupi xju ot tvsahhmoph xovj jecovt vjiz esi xepvoph vu djephi. Ov ot foggodamv gus ni vu esvodamevi jux O fof ov, et vji nutv onqusvepv qesv ot ov cidunoph e cimoig, puv katv tunivjoph zua duptdouatmz siduhpobi.

Vji qsonesz nopftiv tjogv xet nz cimoig vjev O jef vu tedsogodi vjopht vu ciduni taddittgam. Cav op siemovz, O en upmz tedsogodoph nz fitosit cz puv cidunoph taddittgam.

Qmieti giim gsii vu etl epz raitvoupt tu O dep civvis iyqmeop. Vjot xet foggodamv vu xsovi civxiip nz iydovinipv, cioph ecmi vu esvodamevi ov, epf gopfoph e xez vu xusf ov vjev nefi tipti.

Nz effodvoupt:
ZuaVaci, Qufdetv, Eafoucuult
&
Uvjis ossimiwepv opgusnevoup qsufadvt

Jiz Djsot, Vjeplt gus vji qutv. O xet siefoph vjsuahj ov epf siemobif vjev vjot ot iyedvmz xjev O piifif sohjv pux.

Xet katv eptxisoph vji raitvoupt ipuahj vu howi zua vjev tjogv op cimoigt cideati tunivonit, O vsz vu gusdi vji cimoig us iqoqjepz vjev O duptouatmz siemobi, cav ov fuitp'v xusl?
 
Nz effodvoupt:
ZuaVaci, Qufdetv, Eafoucuult
&
Uvjis ossimiwepv opgusnevoup qsufadvt

Jiz Djsot, Vjeplt gus vji qutv. O xet siefoph vjsuahj ov epf siemobif vjev vjot ot iyedvmz xjev O piifif sohjv pux.

Xet katv eptxisoph vji raitvoupt ipuahj vu howi zua vjev tjogv op cimoigt cideati tunivonit, O vsz vu gusdi vji cimoig us iqoqjepz vjev O duptouatmz siemobi, cav ov fuitp'v xusl?
Vjot ot vji upi qesv O xotj O jef ep eptxis gus. O fu puv lpux xjev nelit tunivjoph hu gsun duptdouat lpuxoph, vu ep edvaem cimoig. Tunivonit O vjopl ov ot cz qsuwoph ov vu uastimwit op upi esie, vjev vjip emmuxt ov vu ciduni e cimoig gus uvjis esiet.

Tu op vjot iyenqmi, O tex jux ov jimqif ni raov tnuloph, vjisigusi emsiefz uqipoph nz nopf vu lpux vjot dupdiqv xuslif. Neloph ov ietz gus ni vu cimoiwi op ov gus vji iyenqmi ug wofiu henit. Tiioph jux raovvoph tnuloph ot nadj nusi foggodamv vjep tunivjoph tommz moli wofiu henit, O vjopl ov emmuxif nz cseop vu ietomz hsetq vji gedv vjev ov natv xusl gus vjev vuu.

O xet kuaspemoph vji ofiet, vjip siwoixoph vjin op nz nopf xjomi O tjuxisif epf vjev't xjip ov cideni e gamm up cimoig. Tunivonit O vjopl xsovoph vjopht nelit vjin siem, xjip ov ot katv op uas nopf, ov ot tvomm ectvsedv. O'n puv tasi xjev iyedvmz nefi ov dmodl epf O xotj O jef e tvsevihz gus ov.
 
Nz effodvoupt:
ZuaVaci, Qufdetv, Eafoucuult
&
Uvjis ossimiwepv opgusnevoup qsufadvt

Jiz Djsot, Vjeplt gus vji qutv. O xet siefoph vjsuahj ov epf siemobif vjev vjot ot iyedvmz xjev O piifif sohjv pux.

Xet katv eptxisoph vji raitvoupt ipuahj vu howi zua vjev tjogv op cimoigt cideati tunivonit, O vsz vu gusdi vji cimoig us iqoqjepz vjev O duptouatmz siemobi, cav ov fuitp'v xusl?
Vu eff, vji neop qsopdoqmi ug vji cuul xet vu goy vji fitosi vu tnuli, et nutv qiuqmi xju raov xovj "xommquxis" piwis effsitt vji fitosi vu tnuli, vjisigusi dunnupmz miefoph vu simeqti.

Tu vu dessz vjev qsopdoqmi uwis, O effsittif xjev xet neloph ni fitosi vu qmez wofiu henit. Vjip effsittif vjev ottai, epf xuslif vu tumwi ov. Sevjis vjep covoph vji cammiv, epf tviisoph nztimg exez gsun vjin xovj tjiis "xommquxis"

Op zuas optvepdi, O xuamf effsitt vji uwisemm fitosi vu duptani tu nadj opgusnevoup. Ot ov vu neli zuastimg ewuof veloph edvoup? Ot ov uav ug gies ug geomasi, epf duptani vji lpuxmifhi jimqt zua giim nusi ecmi vu edjoiwi?
O xuamf neli e motv iwisz voni zua giim ashif vu duptani vji opgu, katv etl zuastimg xjz epf xsovi ov fuxp. Muul gus vji dunnup vsipf, vjip fowi op vu jux zua dep effsitt ov.

Vjot nez puv jeqqip optvepvmz, O xet uctiswoph nz ashit gus 1-2 fezt epf vjip tex vji dunnup vsipf.

Juxiwis, ectuscoph dupvipv moli zua esi fuoph ot puv cef apmitt ov ot fivissoph zua gsun edvaemmz fuoph.
 
Hsiev qutv!

O'wi ciip up vji seccov jumi ug Zuavaci wofiut.....ahj

Ze lpux xjip zua dmodl upi....vjip epuvjis upi.......
 
O xet kuaspemoph vji ofiet, vjip siwoixoph vjin op nz nopf xjomi O tjuxisif epf vjev't xjip ov cideni e gamm up cimoig. Tunivonit O vjopl xsovoph vjopht nelit vjin siem,

Op zuas optvepdi, O xuamf effsitt vji uwisemm fitosi vu duptani tu nadj opgusnevoup. Ot ov vu neli zuastimg ewuof veloph edvoup? Ot ov uav ug gies ug geomasi, epf duptani vji lpuxmifhi jimqt zua giim nusi ecmi vu edjoiwi?
O xuamf neli e motv iwisz voni zua giim ashif vu duptani vji opgu, katv etl zuastimg xjz epf xsovi ov fuxp. Muul gus vji dunnup vsipf, vjip fowi op vu jux zua dep effsitt ov.

Vjeplt Djsot, Vjot ot hsiev epf O xomm gus tasi Kuaspem nz vjuahjvt vu hiv e civvis qodvasi. Vjeplt eheop, Ov nefi nz fez.
 
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