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INTRO Pick Up Artists are Quoting MJs Book In Their Courses?!

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MisterMao

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Pick Up Artists are Quoting MJs Book In Their Courses?!

I've recently started a pickup course. The instructor is big on being an all-around better man. You know, a lot similar to Dale Carnegie's book and outlooks of members on this forum (in relation to business-caring and helping).

The section I'm on is about approach anxiety.

He quoted MJs first book and said it was a beautiful quote before and after saying it:

“Immunization from victim-itis occurs when you’re both responsible for and accountable for your actions and the possible poor consequences of those actions. Own your mistakes, failures, and triumphs. Reflect on your choices. Are you in a situation because you delivered yourself there? Did you error in the process? Were you lazy? Most bad situations are consequences of bad choices. Own them and you own your life. No one can steer you off course because you are in the driver's seat. And when you own your decisions something miraculous happens. Failure doesn’t become the badge of victimhood, it becomes WISDOM. Deny accountability and responsibility and the keys of your life are given to someone else. In other words, take the driver seat to your life."

---------------
Introduction
---------------

Apologies for any typos. I have the book on my kindle. But I typed out directly while watching the video.

I've lurked on this forum from time to time over the years. A good bit of action faking. There were times I took good, solid action. But there wasn't enough solid action to follow through.

I've been getting back onto my track in life as of recently. I knew I would make a post soon enough. I was waiting for my actions to pay results before I made my first thread. But since I wanted to share this funny coincidence, here I am.

-----------
Since we are here, I mine as well extend a thank you to some members of this forum who have done a great service for many.

They've affected the lives and paradigms of many people. Including people such as myself who have only lurked. Thanks for sharing your knowledge freely.

@Fox
@Andy Black
@SinisterLex
@Kak
@IceCreamKid
@Vigilante
@MJ DeMarco - For starting it all

----------
Disclaimer: I have no affiliation with the pickup community or their products.

 

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Last edited:

Ninjakid

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I'm not sure if you've read the other posts on this forum, but we're generally not kind to pick-up artists, or people who follow that community. And I highly doubt MJ wants to be associated with pick-up artists.
 
OP
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M

MisterMao

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Jan 12, 2018
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I'm not sure if you've read the other posts on this forum, but we're generally not kind to pick-up artists, or people who follow that community. And I highly doubt MJ wants to be associated with pick-up artists.
Yeah, I know that it's in the rules to not talk about all the PUA BS. Because at the end of the day no one wants to hear you pounding your chest over pointless nonsense.

I will gladly take this thread down if MJ feels it is associating him in a negative way.

This course, in particular, is more about life mastery and being better with people in general. Not how a lot of the pickup community likely is and how it's perceived.

I totally understand your point of view. Thanks for the input Ninjakid.
 
OP
OP
M

MisterMao

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Yeah, I know that it's in the rules to not talk about all the PUA BS. Because at the end of the day no one wants to hear you pounding your chest over pointless nonsense.

I will gladly take this thread down if MJ feels it is associating him in a negative way.

This course, in particular, is more about life mastery and being better with people in general. Not how a lot of the pickup community likely is and how it's perceived.

I totally understand your point of view. Thanks for the input Ninjakid.
PS Sometimes you see the positivity in something and don't stop to think about how it will be perceived. I was seeing it from a positive light of growing as an individual and how MJs words translate to many facets of life.
 

PureA

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I'm not sure if you've read the other posts on this forum, but we're generally not kind to pick-up artists, or people who follow that community. And I highly doubt MJ wants to be associated with pick-up artists.
I'm sure MJ will be pleased have positively effected someone so much so that they share the book in their leveraged position.

We are all on the same team here, no us v them needed.
 

Ninjakid

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I'm sure MJ will be pleased have positively effected someone so much so that they share the book in their leveraged position.

We are all on the same team here, no us v them needed.
Pickup communities often give toxic and misleading advice under the guise of self-improvement.

OP seems like a decent guy though, I'm not judging him on the pickup thing alone
 

JAJT

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He quoted MJs first book and said it was a beautiful quote
Well even a broken clock is right twice per day :p

Let me offer you a small piece of advice: distance yourself from anything with "pick up artist" in the name.

"Pick up artist" might as well be a synonym for "lying and tricking women to get them into bed".

Imagine how you would sound if you came here and said this:

I've recently started course on lying and tricking women to get them into bed. The instructor is big on being an all-around better man....
No.
It would sound ridiculous.
But that's EXACTLY how decent folk view the term "pick up artist".

I'm not saying the course you joined is garbage.
I'm not saying that you won't learn decent, honest things in the course.

I'm just saying it looks bad to EVERYONE who isn't in that community.

Congrats on stepping up and taking action towards bettering yourself - it's an AWESOME goal. But I think it's important that you understand how everyone else views the kind of content we expect from a course like that.
 

Carol Jones

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I've recently started a pickup course
Good morning from rural Australia,

My goodness gracious! Talk about learning something new every day. I had no idea there were courses that teach you how to become a 'Pick Up Artist'.

I had to rush to Google to see if the term meant something different to what it meant when I was a single gal. It doesn't.

I've obviously been buried for far too long in my remote rural village. Thank you @MisterMao for broadening my education! ~Carol❤
 
D

Deleted52409

Guest
I don't understand why guys chase women. If women see you as a man of value they will flock to you. But then even when you do get to that stage, you yourself need to consider if all the attention is worth it. The current dating landscape is very very very very extremely risky. Especially for my generation, it's like walking through a minefield. One false step could completely ruin your life. Be careful out there!
 
G

Guest92dX

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Well even a broken clock is right twice per day :p

Let me offer you a small piece of advice: distance yourself from anything with "pick up artist" in the name.

"Pick up artist" might as well be a synonym for "lying and tricking women to get them into bed".

Imagine how you would sound if you came here and said this:



No.
It would sound ridiculous.
But that's EXACTLY how decent folk view the term "pick up artist".

I'm not saying the course you joined is garbage.
I'm not saying that you won't learn decent, honest things in the course.

I'm just saying it looks bad to EVERYONE who isn't in that community.

Congrats on stepping up and taking action towards bettering yourself - it's an AWESOME goal. But I think it's important that you understand how everyone else views the kind of content we expect from a course like that.
This.

And, it's like saying. I have a one track mind.

The issue is soooooo bad. I got asked by a female, "Are you alpha?"

I said, "What's that fake mess?"

Short story. Be diverse man. There are more possibilities out here than chess and go. No one solves a Rubik's cube when the stickers are changed up anyway.

Also, the reality is that PUA guys are getting literal brain damage. So, love your brain. Seriously. You only get one. There are no transplants.
 

xxlfire

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I think most guys that get into pick up are guys that just have self esteem issues coming from a fked up childhood or just bad experiences with girls at a younger age. It's not about tricking girls or lying to them. It is about starting to talk to girls no matter how weird it is or feels and push through yur fears.

I mean its not a lot more then being relaxed around girls and don't feel the need to get validation from them or make them like you.
If you are relaxed and just have a great time it will "transfer" on to her and she will too.
That's like the base for me, so sad that a lot of people think of pickup as hacking her mind and making her want to sleep with you even tho she doesn't want to lol.
Maybe because of all the youtube videos where people run around using stupid pick up lines.
 

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MisterMao

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I understand where everyone is coming from. It was foolish of me to believe my short explanation of the course would alleviate any negative connotations associated with the "pickup scene".

A lot of "pick up artists" seem to come from a place of hurt and pain. Their (certain ones) sole purpose is to negatively manipulate women. Covering their weakness with a temporary band-aid. Furthermore, many of them are outright disrespectful. As well as receiving their validation from their peers when they try to pound their chest. More could be said, but-

One of my interests is in marketing. Since business revolves around marketing and sales. To the outside world, beyond the walls of this forum, marketing and sales are often looked down upon. But they don't realize it can be used for good or bad and that marketing/sales/business is best when based on a win-win-win situation.

Just a quick sidenote about marketing being all about manipulation, influence, and drawing on emotions, etc. But not in an evil, sheisty, snake oil salesman way.

Furthering the marketing point. I've always been fairly adept at understanding people and the causes behind their action ie emotions, psychology etc. According to the Harvard Business Review in 2009 "They (women) control $20 trillion in consumer spending..."

A deeper understanding womens psychology and their emotional drivers is a great key to furthering your marketing efforts. Since "it doesn't end with marketing, it begins with marketing."

Personally, I want abundance in all aspects of my life. From wealth (financial), health, the relationships in my life, and everything in between. Even in a technical position, 80% of your job is dependent on how well you are with your communication skills.

Someone once said that a man's purpose was to spread love. To spread love through his passions and purpose. I believe that translates into business, your love life, family life, and the elderly lady standing in front of you at checkout. (and the men and women that you have s**ual/romantic relationships with)

I would never consider myself a "PUA". I am me. Such extreme labels are unnecessary. I just so happen to pick up (no pun intended) skills that I believe will help others and myself in life.

Again, it was purely my fault for believing others would see my point of view from such a brief explanation to fight outside viewpoints. I was just so excited to share that something I looked at as being positive brought up MJ's book (while being in an entirely different realm).

I was in a hurry and didn't have the time to properly express myself.

Thank you, everyone, for the kind responses.

P.S. That will be the end of any "PUA" talk. Since the main reason for being here is for the sharing of business views and getting further professionally.

P.P.S. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be better with women. And I believe these skills translate to all aspects of life.

"The only thing I know is that I know nothing." -Socrates (Don't want to sound like I think I know it all. Since the members of this forum know mountains more about business than I do.)
 
Last edited:

MJ DeMarco

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I'm sure MJ will be pleased have positively effected someone so much so that they share the book in their leveraged position.
Yes, I have no control over who quotes my book. I'm flattered and I generally don't do a background check on who does.

If women see you as a man of value they will flock to you.
That's the big secret right there and it's too simple. Value of course is in the eye of the beholder; funny, confident, charisma, accomplished, intelligent, skilled, well-groomed, well-spoken, honest, caring, trustworthy...
 

diegorueda

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I actually know the PUA that OP is talking about. While he still teach some PUA tactics, he advises not to use them. He and everyone in his organization, I think, use a different approach and they are more concerned with become a man of value than to trick women. They actually rant a lot about PUAs, but... as any other lifestyle businesses, still use some of that things in their marketing.

Paraphrasing one of them: the true self is always coming through. Meaning that you can cheat and fake for some moments, but you can't hold it in the long-term.

It's kind of the same in marketing and business, isn't it?
 

LeoistheSun

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Rule no 1#: You do not talk about PUA
Rule no 2#: You do not talk about PUA
(fight club reference)

Being honest about your masculinity is something that should be celebrated but unfortunately is vilified.
 

JAJT

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Being honest about your masculinity is something that should be celebrated but unfortunately is vilified.
It's not vilified - there are just appropriate and inappropriate ways of doing so in a respectful way.

I can't think of any positive "masculine" behaviors that can't be expressed in perfectly appropriate ways.

Even casually sexual encounters can be handled in a respectful manner. If some guy is out to "score" and goes looking for women who are also looking to "score", that's a totally respectful, honest, mutually beneficial encounter.

Things become disrespectful when one party only cares about the goal (like sex) and will lie, cheat, steal, or whatever is necessary to get it. That's not mutually beneficial. That's not respectful. It's just wrong.

People like to compare this crap to marketing or sales - except that good marketing and sales is all about finding the "right fit". If you advertise a BMW, you better deliver the BMW. If you advertise the Go-Kart, you better deliver the Go-Kart. If you advertise the BMW and give a Go-Kart, yeah, people are going to be upset when you gloat about how many Go-Karts you sold to BMW buyers.
 

diegorueda

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Things become disrespectful when one party only cares about the goal (like sex) and will lie, cheat, steal, or whatever is necessary to get it. That's not mutually beneficial. That's not respectful. It's just wrong.
Yeah, Totally agree. It happens the same in business.

People like to compare this crap to marketing or sales - except that good marketing and sales is all about finding the "right fit". If you advertise a BMW, you better deliver the BMW. If you advertise the Go-Kart, you better deliver the Go-Kart. If you advertise the BMW and give a Go-Kart, yeah, people are going to be upset when you gloat about how many Go-Karts you sold to BMW buyers.
You can't compare this crap with good marketing or sales, only with the bad ones. Maybe "been a sexworthy guy" is a better term to describe an honest approach to dating/relationships. Actually, I don't know if there is any good term to define it, haha. But I know there is an honest way of doing it, as you said, and it doesn't involve having a hidden agenda.

Personally, I can't think of me tricking a woman to have sex, neither lying to get a sale. I'd feel worst than she, for sure.

Anyway, maybe we are talking too much about "PUA" in a forum that doesn't allow it. My apologies if that is the case ;). PUA people are like sidewalkers haha.
 

GMSI7D

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Pick Up Artists are Quoting MJs Book In Their Courses?!

I've recently started a pickup course. The instructor is big on being an all-around better man. You know, a lot similar to Dale Carnegie's book and outlooks of members on this forum (in relation to business-caring and helping).

The section I'm on is about approach anxiety.

He quoted MJs first book and said it was a beautiful quote before and after saying it:

“Immunization from victim-itis occurs when you’re both responsible for and accountable for your actions and the possible poor consequences of those actions. Own your mistakes, failures, and triumphs. Reflect on your choices. Are you in a situation because you delivered yourself there? Did you error in the process? Were you lazy? Most bad situations are consequences of bad choices. Own them and you own your life. No one can steer you off course because you are in the driver's seat. And when you own your decisions something miraculous happens. Failure doesn’t become the badge of victimhood, it becomes WISDOM. Deny accountability and responsibility and the keys of your life are given to someone else. In other words, take the driver seat to your life."

---------------
Introduction
---------------

Apologies for any typos. I have the book on my kindle. But I typed out directly while watching the video.

I've lurked on this forum from time to time over the years. A good bit of action faking. There were times I took good, solid action. But there wasn't enough solid action to follow through.

I've been getting back onto my track in life as of recently. I knew I would make a post soon enough. I was waiting for my actions to pay results before I made my first thread. But since I wanted to share this funny coincidence, here I am.

-----------
Since we are here, I mine as well extend a thank you to some members of this forum who have done a great service for many.

They've affected the lives and paradigms of many people. Including people such as myself who have only lurked. Thanks for sharing your knowledge freely.

@Fox
@Andy Black
@SinisterLex
@Kak
@IceCreamKid
@Vigilante
@MJ DeMarco - For starting it all

----------
Disclaimer: I have no affiliation with the pickup community or their products.


yes this is RSD max i think who quoted MJ DeMarco

max is not a fake. he is just a regular guy with a alot of energy

energy is not PUA BS or trickery

if you are boring like a dead fish, the odds are that women won't talk to you



max's teaching is just common sense


but common sense has become rare in this society

that's why a german speaking guy from austria in europe is forced to come to the USA to teach US guys how to get laid


it sounds weird to me


so you american guys should think twice about your society and political correctness wich is destroying your manhood

and i am serious here

.
 

Charnell

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so you american guys should think twice about your society and political correctness wich is destroying your manhood

and i am serious here

.
You should think twice about proofreading before hitting that reply button.

And I am serious here.
 

LeoistheSun

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I would argue that PU and Entrepreneurship go hand in hand... They both are Unscripted.

Nothing wrong with wanting real choices.
 

giovanni93

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I think most guys that get into pick up are guys that just have self esteem issues coming from a fked up childhood or just bad experiences with girls at a younger age. It's not about tricking girls or lying to them. It is about starting to talk to girls no matter how weird it is or feels and push through yur fears.

I mean its not a lot more then being relaxed around girls and don't feel the need to get validation from them or make them like you.
If you are relaxed and just have a great time it will "transfer" on to her and she will too.
That's like the base for me, so sad that a lot of people think of pickup as hacking her mind and making her want to sleep with you even tho she doesn't want to lol.
Maybe because of all the youtube videos where people run around using stupid pick up lines.
I think it's just the connotation of the word "pick up artist," it sounds sleazy and with what people have been told about it, along with the old concepts of manipulation and canned lines. Although, those videos are definitely part of it, even though those are just used to entice an audience, not what's actually done normally. It's sort of how I imagine people do word association with "rich people," assumption that they're arrogant people who hate poor people or some variation of that. There are some people who are good and there are some that are bad.

There are definitely some within that community that rely on deception, but there's also a lot of people on the other side of that coin that vouch for focusing on being happy with who you are and honesty. Half of the learning in that community is learning how to be happy with who you are as person (especially uncontrollable factors such as height, race, looks, etc.) and continuously working on the parts you can improve (career, the way you dress, personal hygiene, health, etc.). The other half is learning how to properly talk to women, being able to approach in general while not having an anxiety attack lol, and just learning how to accept rejection and not allowing one person's opinion of you determine who you are.
 

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active employ

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Take those pickup books you got, and place them in a nice neat stack.
then set them on fire.

Nothing inside them will help you live a better life.
I know quite a few pickup artists personally, and there is no art to their ''work''
it's a sad job selling bad dogma prepackaged for purchase that takes advantage of the untrained female mind.
By indulging in that area of living you are permanently changing the lives of many.
something you might not think about until one day the gavel bangs to place you in a lifetime in prison, while those victims you banged watch you with uncaring eyes.

and you know what?
no one will remember you. Except for those who hate you.
As a human, you are better than that.
 

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