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I admittedly am making this post to vent out but to also get genuine feedback whether I am acting badly or not from whoever reads it (I don't expect many to).
This year started so nicely. An FTM in the previous December made me consider for the first time entrepreneurship. On the 1st of January I happily went to my best friend who kept talking about business topics to discuss my new idea. Sooner or later we 'vowed' to build something from the start that 'will be great'.
We are both college student getting bla bla and bla bla degree. We've started by getting another friend on board, buying some books on businesses and marketing (yeah, action faking mostly) and looking for ideas . Right from the get go I was reading books but he never touched any book. The excuses were always the, 'university takes time' (even though I went to uni also but hey 'my degree is easier' apparently), medical appointments which took 5-6 hours per week, 'buying food', 'cleaning' etc. At first I was compassionate and let it slide more or less, although being kinda surprised that he couldn't even put 1 hour into it.
Month of May comes around and guess what, while I've read some books and struggled to look for business ideas for the past 3 months he read 1/3 of a book and didn't spit out any ideas besides like 1 or 2 by random. Meanwhile I get a good business idea and later that month my FTE with a bunch of drunken degens waking me up at 4 in the morning, recording me and dragging a music speaker in the room because, quote 'F*ck (insert my name) who cares about him' but that's another story. Ok , now I have the idea and make an action plan of what we need to do, but do we start working on it 50/50? No, because he had his undergrad thesis to write (which he didn't finish) and after the END of the uni he 'really needed a vacation' for like 1 and a half weeks. Thankfully I got the reluctant promise all of this time that he will learn web dev from scratch to build the website that we'll need.
In July after this whole vacation I start obviously asking about when will he start doing the website that we'll need (I myself needed to do a lot of learning in the AI field for the idea). He starts going through some little Freecodecamp courses but pretty much ends there because now he goes to the other side of the country (Romania) to work almost minimum wage (like 525$/m) putting clothes on shelves because, 'I really need pocket money'. Keep in mind he lives like me with his parents so his living costs are 0 , but hey when I criticized his time allocation my only answer was 'in life you just need pocket money'. And shockingly for the next 3 months he wouldn't learn anything useful because he was tired from work
He comes back in October (he finished uni, I am in my 4th year of my undergrad) and this time he has nothing else to do on paper. Meanwhile I myself started to learn web dev from scratch to get the job done and the idea actually is starting to take shape. I get on a Whatsapp call with him and the other guy and I angrily ask him if he even knows what we're selling. He hits it in some vague terms and starts asking me about the legal accounting stuff which made me 10x angrier (I honestly want to ask any businessman here, is the legal and accounting stuff so complicated and important that it needs to be discussed when you don't even have a product to sell?). Skip forward to today (Nov. 30) he said he can basically put 5 hours a week on learning web dev. The reasons given to me literally were 'cleaning the house takes time' and 'I am reading about my medical supplements online' before I got him angry because I am 'asking too many questions'.
For the last 11 months I have been bombarded with promises. Promises on reading books, on learning how to program, on giving ideas, on finding people that can help and so forth. I also got the 'I understand where you're coming from' and 'I would feel the same' phrases thrown at every level. I got told every time by others to just relax and be compassionate, give time and have empathy cause he is my best friend after all. Oh, I almost forgot the "we'll build a million dollar business" and "I believe in what we're doing" cherries on the top.
I am f***ing sick of them. Yeah, I have a live or die mentality when it comes to the business now, I am by every sense of the word obsessed on it. That's cause I don't want to end up like a looser drinking my weekends away and dying on the rest of the week at some low paying job, cause I have my partially blind which put so much effort into taking care of me that it would kill me if I wouldn't make her proud, cause I have a faith in God that he didn't put me on earth to wither away and gave me talents to sow as the parable goes etc.. I didn't take any minimum wage job during summer, I cut expenses, I avoided as many uni courses as I could without being kicked out just to have more time to put into the business. I fought demons when I came back at 8 in the evening just to open VScode and write some lines before I went to sleep.
And I honestly feel like I am alone and overwhelmed. I feel like even my best friend abandoned me. Like I am pushing something while no one else believes in me. I don't want to do it alone, that's the truth. Admittedly that's why I joined this forum, to find people that I could learn from and share back. I put in all this time and now it feels like I might be in a giant dunning-kruger bubble of confidence while looking like a lunatic pushing a mountain from the outside. And yeah I kinda need some cheering.
But I am tired of excuses, of action faking discussions on 'wHaT iS ThE bESt Way tO lEaRN hOw tO pROgrAM". I am tired of not saying no, you know what, your excuses are bu****it and yes you have 0 clue on how to make a product so I don't want to hear your legal entity garbage . That despite being my best friend and all of the nice promises and 'compassion' on the planet the actions speak the loudest, and they say that you broke your promises.
At the end of the day what should I even do? Kick him out and basically remain almost alone? Find another guy that might be a promise printer also?
And what if I am a lunatic and the problem is me, what if my idea is bad or that am grumpy and mean? Should I look for some experienced businessman to give me advice, or try to prove my idea even further than I did? (I mean what kind of businessman would do that if I had nothing to offer).
There's a saying here, 'good friends are known at times of need' (don't know if it's anywhere else on the globe). I am starting to understand what it means finally
This year started so nicely. An FTM in the previous December made me consider for the first time entrepreneurship. On the 1st of January I happily went to my best friend who kept talking about business topics to discuss my new idea. Sooner or later we 'vowed' to build something from the start that 'will be great'.
We are both college student getting bla bla and bla bla degree. We've started by getting another friend on board, buying some books on businesses and marketing (yeah, action faking mostly) and looking for ideas . Right from the get go I was reading books but he never touched any book. The excuses were always the, 'university takes time' (even though I went to uni also but hey 'my degree is easier' apparently), medical appointments which took 5-6 hours per week, 'buying food', 'cleaning' etc. At first I was compassionate and let it slide more or less, although being kinda surprised that he couldn't even put 1 hour into it.
Month of May comes around and guess what, while I've read some books and struggled to look for business ideas for the past 3 months he read 1/3 of a book and didn't spit out any ideas besides like 1 or 2 by random. Meanwhile I get a good business idea and later that month my FTE with a bunch of drunken degens waking me up at 4 in the morning, recording me and dragging a music speaker in the room because, quote 'F*ck (insert my name) who cares about him' but that's another story. Ok , now I have the idea and make an action plan of what we need to do, but do we start working on it 50/50? No, because he had his undergrad thesis to write (which he didn't finish) and after the END of the uni he 'really needed a vacation' for like 1 and a half weeks. Thankfully I got the reluctant promise all of this time that he will learn web dev from scratch to build the website that we'll need.
In July after this whole vacation I start obviously asking about when will he start doing the website that we'll need (I myself needed to do a lot of learning in the AI field for the idea). He starts going through some little Freecodecamp courses but pretty much ends there because now he goes to the other side of the country (Romania) to work almost minimum wage (like 525$/m) putting clothes on shelves because, 'I really need pocket money'. Keep in mind he lives like me with his parents so his living costs are 0 , but hey when I criticized his time allocation my only answer was 'in life you just need pocket money'. And shockingly for the next 3 months he wouldn't learn anything useful because he was tired from work
He comes back in October (he finished uni, I am in my 4th year of my undergrad) and this time he has nothing else to do on paper. Meanwhile I myself started to learn web dev from scratch to get the job done and the idea actually is starting to take shape. I get on a Whatsapp call with him and the other guy and I angrily ask him if he even knows what we're selling. He hits it in some vague terms and starts asking me about the legal accounting stuff which made me 10x angrier (I honestly want to ask any businessman here, is the legal and accounting stuff so complicated and important that it needs to be discussed when you don't even have a product to sell?). Skip forward to today (Nov. 30) he said he can basically put 5 hours a week on learning web dev. The reasons given to me literally were 'cleaning the house takes time' and 'I am reading about my medical supplements online' before I got him angry because I am 'asking too many questions'.
For the last 11 months I have been bombarded with promises. Promises on reading books, on learning how to program, on giving ideas, on finding people that can help and so forth. I also got the 'I understand where you're coming from' and 'I would feel the same' phrases thrown at every level. I got told every time by others to just relax and be compassionate, give time and have empathy cause he is my best friend after all. Oh, I almost forgot the "we'll build a million dollar business" and "I believe in what we're doing" cherries on the top.
I am f***ing sick of them. Yeah, I have a live or die mentality when it comes to the business now, I am by every sense of the word obsessed on it. That's cause I don't want to end up like a looser drinking my weekends away and dying on the rest of the week at some low paying job, cause I have my partially blind which put so much effort into taking care of me that it would kill me if I wouldn't make her proud, cause I have a faith in God that he didn't put me on earth to wither away and gave me talents to sow as the parable goes etc.. I didn't take any minimum wage job during summer, I cut expenses, I avoided as many uni courses as I could without being kicked out just to have more time to put into the business. I fought demons when I came back at 8 in the evening just to open VScode and write some lines before I went to sleep.
And I honestly feel like I am alone and overwhelmed. I feel like even my best friend abandoned me. Like I am pushing something while no one else believes in me. I don't want to do it alone, that's the truth. Admittedly that's why I joined this forum, to find people that I could learn from and share back. I put in all this time and now it feels like I might be in a giant dunning-kruger bubble of confidence while looking like a lunatic pushing a mountain from the outside. And yeah I kinda need some cheering.
But I am tired of excuses, of action faking discussions on 'wHaT iS ThE bESt Way tO lEaRN hOw tO pROgrAM". I am tired of not saying no, you know what, your excuses are bu****it and yes you have 0 clue on how to make a product so I don't want to hear your legal entity garbage . That despite being my best friend and all of the nice promises and 'compassion' on the planet the actions speak the loudest, and they say that you broke your promises.
At the end of the day what should I even do? Kick him out and basically remain almost alone? Find another guy that might be a promise printer also?
And what if I am a lunatic and the problem is me, what if my idea is bad or that am grumpy and mean? Should I look for some experienced businessman to give me advice, or try to prove my idea even further than I did? (I mean what kind of businessman would do that if I had nothing to offer).
There's a saying here, 'good friends are known at times of need' (don't know if it's anywhere else on the globe). I am starting to understand what it means finally
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