I don't know why. Feeling real depressed all of a sudden. Can't go gym, rest day.

Sure some of you guys have been there?
How do you keep going

We've all been there at your age, you're not alone, I suffered from serious depression when I was your age, you'll get through it trust me, it's temporary.

I hope so. The floor seems like my best friend at times.

I always think of some of Gary Halbert's Boron Letters when it comes to this subject. Specifically the letters he wrote like this one The Gary Halbert Letter where he talks about dealing with down days (for those who aren't aware, these are letters he wrote to his son while he was serving time in prison). He was in an environment that wasn't conducive to wishful thinking and platitudes about motivation... some of his other letters talk about having to become self-aware of his own moods otherwise it'd lead to undesirable problems with other (bigger, tougher) inmates. You're not alone.

Hassan said:

Sure some of you guys have been there?
How do you keep going

Click to expand...

Read the self-publishing success story I just posted ...

"Tough times never last; tough people always do." ~Robert Herjavec


Success is not linear. Life is not linear.

Success… What it Really Looks Like…

What was the first thing you read after seeing the inventor with the Lamborghini? (Just curious) Skipping out on ice cream at 10 is tough!

Sorry if this is long. I will do my best to keep it short.

I just got out of a depression. What got me out? Giving myself time to go through that stage and having a plan. I tend to go through depressions when I do not have a business plan in mind. I tend to focus on my failures after a business isn't successful instead of thinking --what's next. Errand Runner USA failed, BuyOfficeFurnitureDepot.com failed. Now I am working on Operation Web Design. I might have a few more businesses to test before finding the one that works for me.

I also keep in mind a thread I read on this forum called If you ever feel "stuck" - read this... by ChrisRempel.

"IT'S JUST LIKE BUILDING A DECK"...

You get your supplies, your hammer, and some nails, and then you just nail it together piece by piece.

Until it's done.

And that's all there is to it.

Pure simplicity in action. There's no "secret searching". No "discovering the way".

Just build a damn deck, and when you run into obstacles, Google your way around them. Not hard.

WHAT'S HARD IS BRINGING YOURSELF TO DO IT.

And the only thing that has worked for me, over the years, to stay on task and maintain progress is to revert my thinking back to "Building a Deck". Forget about the inner doubts. The "fear" of too many options. The subtle negativity that says "don't try too hard in case it flops".

Forget "magic formulas". Forget "wishing really hard to be successful so that the universe will unlock the magical success vibrations in your direction", etc.

JUST BUILD A DAMN DECK.

You can find the thread under Mindset, Motivation, Choices.

I forgot the mention--I think of building the deck as businesses. I have heard it takes about 10 tries to create a successful business. (Someone correct me if I said that wrong!) I am on my 3rd deck right now with a lot more to learn about business.

I am finding that business is extremely mental, like exercise. You have a trainer and the trainer tells you to focus on working out shoulders one day, legs another day, abs the third day, back the 4th day. . . So his voice is in your head during every exercise: shoulders down, chest up, back straight, make sure your head is in alignment with your body, relax the neck, get a few more reps in when you get tired because that is when your muscles get stronger . . . In business I have to remind myself: think of other people, listen to purchasers comments and complaints, ignore putdowns from family members and friends, have backup plans if certain strategies don't work, are there any challenges/flaws I can foresee, is this passive/can this be passive, is this business needed, can this business make me money, when should I quit this business before moving to my next deck (what does this look like?) . . .

Hope this helps! Good luck.

Thanks guys feeling better

Love this forum Lool
Gonna kick sum aysss !:urock2:

ErrandRunnerUSA said:

What was the first thing you read after seeing the inventor with the Lamborghini?

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Don't remember ... but I remember the first thing I *felt*...

Liberated.

Just remember that there is no such thing as failure. There are only results, outcomes, and feedback. Learn to interpret these signals and adjust accordingly. Whether its your business or your personal life. Change makes change.

Remember the words ACTIONS AND REACTION. Life is all about acting then reacting. Reacting is the most important IMO.

I remember Tony Robbins saying that even just a nanometer change in someones face can make the difference between being ugly or beautiful and that the same goes for life, small changes can make huge impacts.

I always get motivation by driving around high end neighborhoods and admiring the homes while thinking about my dreams with music. There is something about music that can really supercharge your motivation and imagination. Albert Einstein said that he never thought using words but with music and indescribable images and deep thoughts.

I think the problem here is your beliefs. Change can happen instantly. You can be a multimillionaire in 5 years. You can go from having $5 in your checking account to having $50,000 in an instant. Failure doesn't mean the end of the world. Money is in abundance. There are a shit load of millionaires out there.

I dig the sentiment behind the old NLP chestnut "There is no failure, only feedback", but I observe that in many cases that is used as an excuse to pretend that something is working when it's really not --- you'll often see this in motivational seminars or workshop demonstrations of an Amazing Foolproof Technique for Changing Your Life (tm).

Where there's a tendency to deny the existence of failure, I think that's just another expression of the fear of failure, reinforcing discomfort with the concept. There is incongruency between saying "there is no such thing as failure" and then encouraging people to not be afraid of failure. Failure is failure.

One of the best reasons to work on your own stuff is because failure is generally not tolerated in organizations ("Failure is not an option" or some such team building rah rah hooey) and so it's encouraged to put a shiny happy face on crappy results, which prevents people from learning from mistakes.

Outside of an organization you are much freer to fail over and over again... cool! People have heard that other old chestnut "Successful people are willing to do what unsuccessful people won't." This is commonly understood to mean "Successful people are willing to work harder, sacrifice, etc." but it appears to me that it might really mean: "Successful people are willing to fail and hit rock bottom"

My suggestion is to do SOMETHING today, then congratulate yourself for it. Take the little wins but make them every day.

I wrote a detailed account of my depression on Thought Catalog - Some Suggestions For Navigating A World That’s 110% Bad | Thought Catalog

Also about getting rid of the things that take away your motivation - Killing the 7 Motivation Murderers – StartupBros

Take a break today but you CAN'T take two days off. One day, fine.
Tomorrow you have to do something small. Maybe a 20 minute walk.
You got this!

Read this somewhere recently "A 3 mile run has done more for treating depression than all psychotherapy combined"

Point is, you need to just accomplish something. Put your dirty clothes away, then the garbage, then etc.

As you do more of this, and maintain these accomplishment threads longer I think you become much more successful in general.

Get organized and stick to it, you won't have time to be feel depressed. Worked for me. Check out asianefficiency.com

As someone who has experienced very severe depression, let me give you my take. I'm talking severe as in actually wanting to kill myself and thinking about it everyday. I was so depressed I had a very hard time driving a car. I couldn't concentrate on anything. I couldn't even read a book. I was cranky, sleepy and lazy. I couldn't bring myself to do anything. And to make matters worse I had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Day in and day out the horrible flashbacks continued along with the severe depression. Days went by, months. No amount of pondering or meditation could get me to make sense of all this pain and madness.

It's a merry go round of hell, its a death spiral, its like being awake while a doctor performs heart surgery and no one can hear you scream.

To put depression in one sentence: It's a death spiral. It doesn't undue itself. You have to ultimately climb out of the hole. Depression doesn't fix itself.

Your gonna have to wake up one day and just stand up to all of this pain and not let it control you.

Were emotional creatures, you can't change that and nothing can. Scientist say that your mind is comprised of 3 "emotional networks". One that controls your fears, anxieties, fight or flight etc. Another that controls our closeness to others, a feeling of wellness with others, bonding, intimacy etc. And another that controls our motivation and desires. Depression is exactly what the word says: It DEPRESSES our motivations, desires and bonding/ intimacy with others. And it SIGNIFICANTLY increases your fight or flight emotions. you feel anger, anxiety etc.

By this logic. Scientifically happiness is the opposite of depression. In happiness we have less flight or flight emotions(anger, hate, anxiety), more intimacy emotions with mankind, your friends and family, your spouse etc, and more feelings of desire and motivations.

Your gonna have to fight back and undo the depression. You have to go out and get closer to people, open up, let your guard down. Your have to find something that motivates you, something that gives you a "spark. Your gonna have to forgive others and have compassion to let go of all the pain and hurt there is no other way.

Your gonna have to forgive all of those that have hurt you. let go of all feelings of blame, hate, anger and revenge. Its the only way out. IT will never fix itself and it doesn't end good. Hate and anger will drown you even more into the black waters of depression and chaos in your mind. Trust me.

Set up a routine. Wake up early and go for a walk. And stick to it. Do some yard work. Gardening is a good hobby to get close to our soft side. There is something wonderful about planting a seed or flower and taking care of it. Smile more often even if you have to fake it. Let people in and let your guard down. Be kind to yourself and others. Depression will want you to lash out.

Let me tell you a secret: Nothing has to happen in order for you to be happy and feel good. you can feel good right now in the moment. And let me tell you another secret: that "time" will never come. Things will never be "just right" for you to be happy. your gonna have to have a good attitude during the storm.

Happiness leads to a lot of wonderful things in life not the other way around, wonderful things don't lead to happiness, happiness lead to wonderful things. Youll find that people respond better to you. others become more interested in you, girls become more fond of you,

The good news is that happiness is an upward spiral just like depression is a downward spiral, it can get better and better(or worse and worse for depression) as the days go by. It really is a CATCH-22. its a paradox. fight back, work backwards, good luck.

socaldude said:

By this logic. Scientifically happiness is the opposite of depression. In happiness we have less flight or flight emotions(anger, hate, anxiety), more intimacy emotions with mankind, your friends and family, your spouse etc, and more feelings of desire and motivations.

Click to expand...

:smx9:

BTW here is another thing most people don't know. The best public speakers and those with the best communication skills are simply the happiest. They have less fight or flight emotional responses(anxiety, anger etc), they have more motivation and they try to create a bond with their audience.

Can you imagine a depressed person trying to give a speech? Now imagine someone who is happy. Big difference.

When you hit the bottom you'll know it:

tomorrow can bring good ideas ... keep working forward.

Thanks for the love and support guys. Really helps.
Appreciate it a bunch.

I am getting better but boy am I being tested, I found out yesterday that the girl I love has been playing me for the two years we were together. It didn't worsen, I actually felt so angry and somehow stronger. Just the pure shock and sense of betrayal overwhelms my thoughts. I really can't comprehend how you could do that to anyone, especially after all they do for you.

Anyways Thanks Guys
Godbless you all !

Accept that life is not all ups.
The down comes with ups, sometimes you will find yourself down. What is important is not staying for there long.
1) Stop waiting to be happy before you do things.
2) Tell yourself, you will always be doing something PERIOD.
3) Happiness doesn't lead us to achieving goals, Happiness comes from achieving goals.
4) Stop laying down too much, get up early, jump out of bed. Never get into bed until it's time to sleep. Maximum sleep/laying down of 8 hrs a day.
5) No TV, No video games, No goofing around. Work, work, work.