I’ll try to keep this as short and concise as possible.
Here is some background info:
Brother and sister lived off my mom their whole lives (both mid and late 40s). Never did a damn thing for her. They milked her for 10s of thousands of dollars and what they couldn’t get, they stole. Me by contrast, I was independent, got a college degree, and got very little to no financial support from my mom.
My mom left one of her bank accounts and some of her cash in a mutual fund to me. Brother and sister are mad and have been harassing me since my mom died to give them this money.
I am not giving it to them because:
Not to mention they both treated me like shit my entire life. They are the reason our family was so broken and divided. So, you can see why I am not happy with them. When my mom was in the hospital in a coma before she died, they ran me off and I was not able to visit her. I am pissed about that as well.
Since my mom died, they have been harassing me for this money and making threats.
From the very first time I spoke to the lawyer, she was hostile. I wanted to talk to her because my brother and sister picked her as the one who would represent us, and I had a few questions. Right from the start, the lawyer was hostile, rude, would not allow me to speak, etc. My sister created a wedge and division from the start.
My brother and sister were able to become co-administrators and I was told they could do this because they lived in CA and I could not be an administrator. Since then, they have been keeping the status of probate a secret from me. The lawyer only communicates with them. Never sent me anything to sign and never tells me anything about the case. Anything they do tell me ends up being lies. We are getting close to a year on the probate process and I have spoken to the lawyer 3 times. All three times were to just ask basic information and I was screamed at and treated with hostilities for it.
It seems that the lawyer has a bias and is favoring them over me, especially my sister. My guess is my sister, from the start, spun lies about me. She basically told the lawyer I treated my mom like dirt, stole from her, was a POS, while she was this “victim” who did everything for her mom. The reality is, it is the exact opposite.
I can assume my sister lied because, for me, this is the only logical explanation of why the lawyer is so hostile as if she hates me. My sister spun these same kinds of lies our whole lives to everyone. She is a pathological liar. I don’t even know the lawyer and spoke to her only 3 times on the phone and only asked basic questions because my brother and sister refuse to share details with me.
Last conversation the lawyer said they do not have to give me any info. My brother and sister are now attempting to petition themselves to take my mom’s vehicles. This is the reason I called the lawyer. I wanted to know if they can legally do this because I never agreed to this. I am just promised they will pay me later. I asked the lawyer for a document that agrees to this and she refused.
One of the houses needs repairs because it has mold. The Realtor said it is illegal to sell a house with mold in CA, no one will give out a loan. I told this to the lawyer after she said everything is being sold as-is. She screamed and told me to “get my own lawyer” and hung up the phone.
It seems to me that the lawyer and my siblings are planning some shady stuff. I have no idea why I am being treated like this. The lawyer and administrators are supposed to be working on behalf of the heirs and if they aren’t, they can be removed. This is the way I understand it. I actually know why I am being treated this way; it is because of the crime of receiving money my mom willed to me. My sister is bitter and angry and turned my brother and the lawyer against me.
My question is, what can I do about all this? I am thinking about filing a complaint with the court and petition to have my sibling’s role as administrator be removed because of their shadiness.
Can my brother and sister essentially rob me if they petition themselves to distribute property however they want? Essentially, take higher value property or even write me out of it completely? It seems like this with my mom’s vehicles. And they plan to do this with her homes. They have even been telling me to get out of my mom’s house now. They have been telling me to leave since my mom died nearly a year ago. The stress actually sent me to the ER 3 times because I thought I was having a heart attack.
I am very unhappy with the lawyer too. Not only for her hostilities and arrogance but being excluded from the entire process and her bias and favoritism toward my siblings, especially my sister. I paid a 3rd of the retainer fee and she is refusing to refund it to me since she said she is not representing me, only my siblings. This whole thing is twisted, and I am so distraught with the games, lies, and abuse. And I am still trying to mourn my mother’s death and handle the responsibility of caring for 4 animals.
By the way, much of the probate process has completed, it is nearing the distribution phase. They are starting with my mom’s vehicles and my sister has chosen to take my mother’s 18K truck, my brother getting my mom’s 9k car, and me getting this beat-up 10-year-old car worth 2k, which I don’t want but am being forced to take. BTW, I never agreed to any of this, never even saw any paperwork. They received this paperwork in private and only their signatures are required. I am told they will pay me later. I do not believe it. Anyone know how probate works and if something shady is going on between my siblings and the lawyer? What can I do?
If you read the whole thing and have some advice, thanks so much.
Sincerely,
NewManRising
- Mom died last year and had two houses and 3 vehicles.
- There is a total of 3 heirs (my sister, my brother, and I)
- There was no will.
- My mom’s main residence was in California and her other house is in Oregon.
- I live in the Oregon house now while my brother and sister live in the CA home.
- I was told since my mother’s main house was in CA, the probate needs to be initiated from there (not sure if this is true).
- Brother and sister got a lawyer and I was not able to offer my input, although I paid a 3rd of the retainer fee.
- The lawyer and siblings have been hostile from the start. They have been withholding information from me and are making agreements without my consent.
- I’ve been completely excluded from the entire probate process.
- Lawyer and siblings, it seems are trying to rip me off.
Here is some background info:
Brother and sister lived off my mom their whole lives (both mid and late 40s). Never did a damn thing for her. They milked her for 10s of thousands of dollars and what they couldn’t get, they stole. Me by contrast, I was independent, got a college degree, and got very little to no financial support from my mom.
My mom left one of her bank accounts and some of her cash in a mutual fund to me. Brother and sister are mad and have been harassing me since my mom died to give them this money.
I am not giving it to them because:
- They treated my mom like shit their entire lives.
- I was the only one who did anything for my mom.
- They promised my mom they would take care of her animals when she passed (they were trying to manipulate the will and telling her to give them everything).
- Once my mom was incapacitated in the hospital, they said “F*ck these animals”, so now I have them (3 dogs and a cat).
- They lived with my mom when she was ill and prevented her from getting any aid and refused to help her with anything. Which ultimately resulted in her accident and death.
Not to mention they both treated me like shit my entire life. They are the reason our family was so broken and divided. So, you can see why I am not happy with them. When my mom was in the hospital in a coma before she died, they ran me off and I was not able to visit her. I am pissed about that as well.
Since my mom died, they have been harassing me for this money and making threats.
From the very first time I spoke to the lawyer, she was hostile. I wanted to talk to her because my brother and sister picked her as the one who would represent us, and I had a few questions. Right from the start, the lawyer was hostile, rude, would not allow me to speak, etc. My sister created a wedge and division from the start.
My brother and sister were able to become co-administrators and I was told they could do this because they lived in CA and I could not be an administrator. Since then, they have been keeping the status of probate a secret from me. The lawyer only communicates with them. Never sent me anything to sign and never tells me anything about the case. Anything they do tell me ends up being lies. We are getting close to a year on the probate process and I have spoken to the lawyer 3 times. All three times were to just ask basic information and I was screamed at and treated with hostilities for it.
It seems that the lawyer has a bias and is favoring them over me, especially my sister. My guess is my sister, from the start, spun lies about me. She basically told the lawyer I treated my mom like dirt, stole from her, was a POS, while she was this “victim” who did everything for her mom. The reality is, it is the exact opposite.
I can assume my sister lied because, for me, this is the only logical explanation of why the lawyer is so hostile as if she hates me. My sister spun these same kinds of lies our whole lives to everyone. She is a pathological liar. I don’t even know the lawyer and spoke to her only 3 times on the phone and only asked basic questions because my brother and sister refuse to share details with me.
Last conversation the lawyer said they do not have to give me any info. My brother and sister are now attempting to petition themselves to take my mom’s vehicles. This is the reason I called the lawyer. I wanted to know if they can legally do this because I never agreed to this. I am just promised they will pay me later. I asked the lawyer for a document that agrees to this and she refused.
One of the houses needs repairs because it has mold. The Realtor said it is illegal to sell a house with mold in CA, no one will give out a loan. I told this to the lawyer after she said everything is being sold as-is. She screamed and told me to “get my own lawyer” and hung up the phone.
It seems to me that the lawyer and my siblings are planning some shady stuff. I have no idea why I am being treated like this. The lawyer and administrators are supposed to be working on behalf of the heirs and if they aren’t, they can be removed. This is the way I understand it. I actually know why I am being treated this way; it is because of the crime of receiving money my mom willed to me. My sister is bitter and angry and turned my brother and the lawyer against me.
My question is, what can I do about all this? I am thinking about filing a complaint with the court and petition to have my sibling’s role as administrator be removed because of their shadiness.
Can my brother and sister essentially rob me if they petition themselves to distribute property however they want? Essentially, take higher value property or even write me out of it completely? It seems like this with my mom’s vehicles. And they plan to do this with her homes. They have even been telling me to get out of my mom’s house now. They have been telling me to leave since my mom died nearly a year ago. The stress actually sent me to the ER 3 times because I thought I was having a heart attack.
I am very unhappy with the lawyer too. Not only for her hostilities and arrogance but being excluded from the entire process and her bias and favoritism toward my siblings, especially my sister. I paid a 3rd of the retainer fee and she is refusing to refund it to me since she said she is not representing me, only my siblings. This whole thing is twisted, and I am so distraught with the games, lies, and abuse. And I am still trying to mourn my mother’s death and handle the responsibility of caring for 4 animals.
By the way, much of the probate process has completed, it is nearing the distribution phase. They are starting with my mom’s vehicles and my sister has chosen to take my mother’s 18K truck, my brother getting my mom’s 9k car, and me getting this beat-up 10-year-old car worth 2k, which I don’t want but am being forced to take. BTW, I never agreed to any of this, never even saw any paperwork. They received this paperwork in private and only their signatures are required. I am told they will pay me later. I do not believe it. Anyone know how probate works and if something shady is going on between my siblings and the lawyer? What can I do?
If you read the whole thing and have some advice, thanks so much.
Sincerely,
NewManRising
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