Lex DeVille
Sweeping Shadows From Dreams
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
LEGACY MEMBER
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
At the risk of outing myself as a psycho...
This post is going to get kind of dark and difficult, but it highlights a core perspective in my life that I do not know how to change and am not sure needs to be changed. If you believe I should approach life or business differently than I have in the past, please add your perspective as it might make a difference. Maybe there's something I haven't considered.
My biggest obstacle in both business and life is that I don't know how to overcome my own reasoning. If I reason that the most likely outcomes in my future are A) Death or B) a world that changes inconceivably, then I also reason that joy/happiness/satisfaction etc., comes from the moment to moment experience. So if I do not enjoy what I am doing at the moment, I choose to change what I am doing because that is what I can control right now.
Not long ago, I reasoned that if death is the only option, then it doesn't matter if I die today or twenty years from now, so today is probably as good a day to die as any (besides, the world has become a bit insufferable). However, if there is even the slightest chance that I might overcome death, then all of my efforts should be put toward that end.
But, if overcoming death results in a different kind of perpetual hell due to the inevitable changes that will result over a long enough timeline, then death may still be the preferred option which brings me back to my original reasoning, except that if I might affect the changes that take place, and if in affecting said changes, I might exist for as long as I want not in a state of perpetual living hell, then that might be worth living for and working toward.
So here I am.
Caught between a rock and a hard place. Not sure if I should live even one more day, but curious enough to not call it quits yet. In the meantime, I'm left with the conclusion that doing whatever I want is the best choice in the moment because that remains the only factor I have any control over, and it remains the only instance of experience that I have at all. That said, doing whatever I want in the present moment *may* negatively affect my *future* moments of experience (let's avoid the issue of time for now).
Based on the above, I believe it would have been better if I had not existed at all so I wouldn't have to deal with any of this. But I never had a choice in that, so I conclude that as long as I'm not breaking laws that would negatively affect my experience, then doing what I want in the moment is still the most sensible conclusion.
As a result, I find myself regularly changing ideas and not making as much progress as others would like to see me make. I say "others" because when I ask myself if I am satisfied with my progress, the answer is either, "I am satisfied and should continue along this path" or "I am unsatisfied and should change this path." If it's the later, then I change directions.
These are difficult issues.
Many people turn to religion to avoid thinking about this stuff. I do not accept religion or deities as a valid solution for me, so I remain with, what many would describe as, a twisted worldview that holds me up in some areas, such as sticking with business ideas for years, while empowering me in other areas, such as in making quick decisions and taking decisive action.
Maybe this perspective makes sense. Maybe it doesn't. If I encounter a more reasonable perspective, then I would be open to changing my worldview, but so far that hasn't happened.
So if you have a different perspective that you think is more reasonable, please share it. The topic is open for discussion.
This post is going to get kind of dark and difficult, but it highlights a core perspective in my life that I do not know how to change and am not sure needs to be changed. If you believe I should approach life or business differently than I have in the past, please add your perspective as it might make a difference. Maybe there's something I haven't considered.
My biggest obstacle in both business and life is that I don't know how to overcome my own reasoning. If I reason that the most likely outcomes in my future are A) Death or B) a world that changes inconceivably, then I also reason that joy/happiness/satisfaction etc., comes from the moment to moment experience. So if I do not enjoy what I am doing at the moment, I choose to change what I am doing because that is what I can control right now.
Not long ago, I reasoned that if death is the only option, then it doesn't matter if I die today or twenty years from now, so today is probably as good a day to die as any (besides, the world has become a bit insufferable). However, if there is even the slightest chance that I might overcome death, then all of my efforts should be put toward that end.
But, if overcoming death results in a different kind of perpetual hell due to the inevitable changes that will result over a long enough timeline, then death may still be the preferred option which brings me back to my original reasoning, except that if I might affect the changes that take place, and if in affecting said changes, I might exist for as long as I want not in a state of perpetual living hell, then that might be worth living for and working toward.
So here I am.
Caught between a rock and a hard place. Not sure if I should live even one more day, but curious enough to not call it quits yet. In the meantime, I'm left with the conclusion that doing whatever I want is the best choice in the moment because that remains the only factor I have any control over, and it remains the only instance of experience that I have at all. That said, doing whatever I want in the present moment *may* negatively affect my *future* moments of experience (let's avoid the issue of time for now).
Based on the above, I believe it would have been better if I had not existed at all so I wouldn't have to deal with any of this. But I never had a choice in that, so I conclude that as long as I'm not breaking laws that would negatively affect my experience, then doing what I want in the moment is still the most sensible conclusion.
As a result, I find myself regularly changing ideas and not making as much progress as others would like to see me make. I say "others" because when I ask myself if I am satisfied with my progress, the answer is either, "I am satisfied and should continue along this path" or "I am unsatisfied and should change this path." If it's the later, then I change directions.
These are difficult issues.
Many people turn to religion to avoid thinking about this stuff. I do not accept religion or deities as a valid solution for me, so I remain with, what many would describe as, a twisted worldview that holds me up in some areas, such as sticking with business ideas for years, while empowering me in other areas, such as in making quick decisions and taking decisive action.
Maybe this perspective makes sense. Maybe it doesn't. If I encounter a more reasonable perspective, then I would be open to changing my worldview, but so far that hasn't happened.
So if you have a different perspective that you think is more reasonable, please share it. The topic is open for discussion.
Dislike ads? Become a Fastlane member:
Subscribe today and surround yourself with winners and millionaire mentors, not those broke friends who only want to drink beer and play video games. :-)
Last edited:
Membership Required: Upgrade to Expose Nearly 1,000,000 Posts
Ready to Unleash the Millionaire Entrepreneur in You?
Become a member of the Fastlane Forum, the private community founded by best-selling author and multi-millionaire entrepreneur MJ DeMarco. Since 2007, MJ DeMarco has poured his heart and soul into the Fastlane Forum, helping entrepreneurs reclaim their time, win their financial freedom, and live their best life.
With more than 39,000 posts packed with insights, strategies, and advice, you’re not just a member—you’re stepping into MJ’s inner-circle, a place where you’ll never be left alone.
Become a member and gain immediate access to...
- Active Community: Ever join a community only to find it DEAD? Not at Fastlane! As you can see from our home page, life-changing content is posted dozens of times daily.
- Exclusive Insights: Direct access to MJ DeMarco’s daily contributions and wisdom.
- Powerful Networking Opportunities: Connect with a diverse group of successful entrepreneurs who can offer mentorship, collaboration, and opportunities.
- Proven Strategies: Learn from the best in the business, with actionable advice and strategies that can accelerate your success.
"You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with the most..."
Who are you surrounding yourself with? Surround yourself with millionaire success. Join Fastlane today!
Join Today