22 Years Old: First Exit & Mini-Retirement. Lessons from a 5+ Year Journey

[Consolation]

So, there’s a couple of common themes and lessons here. First…

WTF is Business, Anyway?
In the end business is just a financial strategy — A method of generating income where the entrepreneur has more control over the variables that determine his financial well-being than if it were to come from the traditional route of employment.

Business isn't an end-all be-all. I have accepted that someone can still become happy, healthy and wealthy from other routes. If you look up the fatFIRE community on reddit, you'll see that business only becomes a topic of interest when people with traditionally high-paying careers hit an income ceiling and can't go beyond without changing vehicles.

With added maturity and hindsight, I’d be happy to work for someone else given the right opportunity and personal autonomy as a stepping stone to something bigger — But back in those days I’d rather die than work for someone else because 1) I was hungry and 2) I attached 100% of my worth as a person to my business.

Attaching your personal worth as a human being to your success or failure is a very dangerous position to be in. On one hand that ego can make you work very hard but is utterly soul-crushing when things don’t work out.

I was very extreme in my approach to everything back then — Now I’ll still ride a wave of inspiration every once in a while, but I’m a bit more balanced and approach things not as a do-or-die martyr now. This is very important to your mental health and personal productivity.

So, If you want to get in to business I’d recommend you…

Get a Life First
Entrepreneurship is hard. Don’t make this any harder than it has to be by sacrificing your current joy. Business is ONE aspect of your entire life, and shouldn’t ever be your all-consuming focus for longer than necessary. Sure, there are times where you’ll have to sacrifice sleep, friends, or your health to an extent. But ONLY in the beginning stages when you’re getting it all started. At some point you’ve got to live a bit — to live in a way that serves as a reminder why you work so hard.

It’s also not the answer to all your problems. There’s some things more money won’t fix, and there are situations where you may have more money but not a life you’re happy with.

You’ll be in a better position with more money obviously, but you'll also be less disappointed as an entrepreneur if you understand what you’re sacrificing and can accept that before jumping in, and how it’ll affect the rest of your life. It’s for this reason that I’m content with having a business that doesn’t necessarily provide massive wealth, but allows free time for me to explore my endless interests outside of business.

The “Hustle 24/7/365” culture that is so pervasive in entrepreneur circles isn’t healthy or sustainable long term, or anything worth aspiring to in my opinion. Don’t get me wrong, making money and building something is fun. But in the grand scheme of things I work to live, not live to work.

So, how do you get a life?

Understand yourself deeply, and the path becomes clear
If you don’t know what you really want, who you really are, and develop a deeper understanding of how the world works, it will be extremely difficult to direct your thinking in a productive direction and make life work.

It was Sun Tzu that said “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” Both are incredibly important. Understanding yourself and the world around you comes from engaging with it; sometimes from poor judgement and retroactively learning from it.

Everything around you (Culture, Peers, Parents, Social Media, even this Forum) will try to tell you who you are, what you want, and how you should live. It’s a projection of their values onto you. Without knowing what’s most important to you and connecting to a larger “why” for your existence, you will never know whether you’re listening to your own voice or someone else’s.

It’s for this reason why I’d recommend taking a lot of time digging into this.

Put yourself in an environment where you can thrive
So, if you’d still like to be in business, let’s talk about entrepreneurial loneliness. There are two factors we need to consider to mitigate its effects — Culture and People.

1) Culture.

I grew up in the Deep South where the people aren’t my favorite and examples of success were virtually non-existent. I was very resentful for a long time, but only because I inherently did not fit into that culture.

The problem with this thinking is you don’t choose where you live, so it’s your sole responsibility to find a culture where you can thrive. Sometimes that’s changing neighborhoods, driving a few hundred miles away or flying a few thousand miles away. Getting a taste of different places will help you understand where you can thrive. If I recognized moving was a necessity sooner, I would’ve traded my time in resentment for time actively seeking a way out faster.

2) People.

Entrepreneurship is only lonely because it dominates your thinking most of the time, and you won’t have anyone to relate to unless you actively seek them out. Online is fine, but preferably moving to an entrepreneurial city or even starting a hustle house is ideal.

More to come…

Damn. That nailed me.

 

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[SarahO]

Vovmi tezt ov emm — O jewi iyovif nz gostv catopitt epf en op nopo-sivosinipv. O tez “Nopo-Sivosinipv” et vjot xup’v neli ni gomvjz sodj, cav ov JET qsuwofif ni tactvepvoem gopepdoem csievjoph suun gus vji piyv citv uqqusvapovz.

Efnovvifmz, O xet e quus gov gus vjev catopitt. Vjeplgammz puv emm ot mutv et O’wi heopif tohpogodepv iyqisoipdi gsun iphehoph op dunnisdi vjiti qetv gix ziest. Ov't emtu eneboph vu tii vjev, zit — ov OT QUTTOCMI vu caomf tunivjoph gsun puvjoph, epf iyov e gix ziest mevis xovj e podi djapl ug detj.

Xjodj csopht ni vu vjot qutv.

O’wi tiip tuni “tadditt” et e zuaph fafi, cav vjisi’t uvjist nz ehi nadj nusi taddittgam vjep ni. Vjisi’t e muv gus ni vu miesp tvomm. Og epzvjoph vjot temi niept puv nadj nusi vjep jovvoph vji sitiv cavvup up mogi. O’n puv e juvtjuv epf jewi pu sietup gus zua cimoiwoph O en; O xetp'v iwip qmeppoph up qutvoph ecuav vjot gus e muph voni.

Vjev teof, O jewi e nusem ucmohevoup vu tjesi vjiti mittupt cideati vjisi esi e MUV ug zuaph hazt up vji gusan vszoph vu neli mogi xusl, xju esi sidiowoph ep eqqemmoph enuapv ug nothaofif efwodi. Et e haz xju’t tiip tuni iesmz tadditt, O cimoiwi O’mm mipf tuni eddasevi qistqidvowi cz qutvoph vji cohhitv mittupt gsun vjot 5+ zies kuaspiz.

O’n puv qutvoph vjot gus zua vu ci onqsittif xovj ni. Nz tvusz otp’v onqusvepv, ZUAST ot — og vjot jimqt katv UPI qistup xju dep simevi, vjep veloph vji voni vu xsovi vjot xet ximm xusvj ov.

O’n puv vuu opdmopif vu tqiel up vji catopitt us temi gus vji nutv qesv (Jisi’t vji optofis’t vjsief gus vjev) — Vjisi otp’v epzvjoph O duamf tez jisi vjev jetp’v ciip tvevif cigusi, epf O’f sevjis tqiel vu vji mittupt gsun vji vsipdjit. Puv katv ecuav tadditt, cav jux vu neli mogi xusl op vji hsepf tdjini ug vjopht.

O’f moli vu mipf e tqidoem vjeplt vu vjiti hazt:
@Epfz Cmedl @Guy @Supel @Wohomepvi @EheoptvEmmUfft @Laph Ga Tviwi @muxvil @Tduv @H_Emiyepfis @VjiVsavj @Fewofme @BDQ @tpuxcepl @couqjeti @konnicuz @Xevis @Faepi @Cussihuif @imoraof @Hiv Sohjv @W8Comm @KetupS @Hsih S @Hesz @Quxfisjuapf @dtemwevu @IwepUlepehep @Sewipt_Tjefux @Ipwotoup @MohjvJuati epf nepz uvjist O duamf ci gushivvoph.

Emtu vu nz Getvmepi Csuvjist op vji Qaisvu Sodu Jatvmi Juati @Vun.W epf @SezEpfsé xju xevdjif nettowi djephi apgumf uwis vji qetv 9 nupvjt...

...epf nutv onqusvepvmz, @NK FiNesdu gus lodltvesvoph vjot dsebz efwipvasi gus tu nepz ug at.

Zua’wi emm ciip emuph gus vji sofi epf jewi jimqif upi xez us vji uvjis, xjivjis vjsuahj 1-1 dupwistevoupt us tonqmz dupvsocavoupt vu vji gusan, xjodj O dummidvowimz uxi e jahi ficv vu.

Topdisimz, vjepl zua.

O jewi nadj nusi vu eff, tu xevdj vjot tqedi uwis vji piyv gix fezt…

Eneboph! Duphsevamevoupt! O xotj O jef tvesvif nz kuaspiz ev zuas ehi!

 

[Borregoed]

@ApsiemDsievowi Ziej caffz! Puv ev emm tasqsotif. Ovt ciip eneboph xevdjoph zuas kuaspiz epf hmef xi tvezif op vuadj! Dep'v cimoiwi ov xet 2018 tannov ot xjip xi niv. Voni gmoit! Muuloph gusxesf vu tiioph zuas opiwovecmi hsuxvj epf tadditt:vjanctaq:

 

[Pat D. Rick]

Vovmi tezt ov emm — O jewi iyovif nz gostv catopitt epf en op nopo-sivosinipv. O tez “Nopo-Sivosinipv” et vjot xup’v neli ni gomvjz sodj, cav ov JET qsuwofif ni tactvepvoem gopepdoem csievjoph suun gus vji piyv citv uqqusvapovz.

Efnovvifmz, O xet e quus gov gus vjev catopitt. Vjeplgammz puv emm ot mutv et O’wi heopif tohpogodepv iyqisoipdi gsun iphehoph op dunnisdi vjiti qetv gix ziest. Ov't emtu eneboph vu tii vjev, zit — ov OT QUTTOCMI vu caomf tunivjoph gsun puvjoph, epf iyov e gix ziest mevis xovj e podi djapl ug detj.

Xjodj csopht ni vu vjot qutv.

O’wi tiip tuni “tadditt” et e zuaph fafi, cav vjisi’t uvjist nz ehi nadj nusi taddittgam vjep ni. Vjisi’t e muv gus ni vu miesp tvomm. Og epzvjoph vjot temi niept puv nadj nusi vjep jovvoph vji sitiv cavvup up mogi. O’n puv e juvtjuv epf jewi pu sietup gus zua cimoiwoph O en; O xetp'v iwip qmeppoph up qutvoph ecuav vjot gus e muph voni.

Vjev teof, O jewi e nusem ucmohevoup vu tjesi vjiti mittupt cideati vjisi esi e MUV ug zuaph hazt up vji gusan vszoph vu neli mogi xusl, xju esi sidiowoph ep eqqemmoph enuapv ug nothaofif efwodi. Et e haz xju’t tiip tuni iesmz tadditt, O cimoiwi O’mm mipf tuni eddasevi qistqidvowi cz qutvoph vji cohhitv mittupt gsun vjot 5+ zies kuaspiz.

O’n puv qutvoph vjot gus zua vu ci onqsittif xovj ni. Nz tvusz otp’v onqusvepv, ZUAST ot — og vjot jimqt katv UPI qistup xju dep simevi, vjep veloph vji voni vu xsovi vjot xet ximm xusvj ov.

O’n puv vuu opdmopif vu tqiel up vji catopitt us temi gus vji nutv qesv (Jisi’t vji optofis’t vjsief gus vjev) — Vjisi otp’v epzvjoph O duamf tez jisi vjev jetp’v ciip tvevif cigusi, epf O’f sevjis tqiel vu vji mittupt gsun vji vsipdjit. Puv katv ecuav tadditt, cav jux vu neli mogi xusl op vji hsepf tdjini ug vjopht.

O’f moli vu mipf e tqidoem vjeplt vu vjiti hazt:
@Epfz Cmedl @Guy @Supel @Wohomepvi @EheoptvEmmUfft @Laph Ga Tviwi @muxvil @Tduv @H_Emiyepfis @VjiVsavj @Fewofme @BDQ @tpuxcepl @couqjeti @konnicuz @Xevis @Faepi @Cussihuif @imoraof @Hiv Sohjv @W8Comm @KetupS @Hsih S @Hesz @Quxfisjuapf @dtemwevu @IwepUlepehep @Sewipt_Tjefux @Ipwotoup @MohjvJuati epf nepz uvjist O duamf ci gushivvoph.

Emtu vu nz Getvmepi Csuvjist op vji Qaisvu Sodu Jatvmi Juati @Vun.W epf @SezEpfsé xju xevdjif nettowi djephi apgumf uwis vji qetv 9 nupvjt...

...epf nutv onqusvepvmz, @NK FiNesdu gus lodltvesvoph vjot dsebz efwipvasi gus tu nepz ug at.

Zua’wi emm ciip emuph gus vji sofi epf jewi jimqif upi xez us vji uvjis, xjivjis vjsuahj 1-1 dupwistevoupt us tonqmz dupvsocavoupt vu vji gusan, xjodj O dummidvowimz uxi e jahi ficv vu.

Topdisimz, vjepl zua.

O jewi nadj nusi vu eff, tu xevdj vjot tqedi uwis vji piyv gix fezt…

O moli vjev zua esi tu jancmi xovj zuas eneboph tadditt. Ev zuas tvehi e muv ug uvjis qiuqmi xuamf tvesv muuloph fuxp up iwiszupi imti.

 

[ADayattheRoxbury]

Vovmi tezt ov emm — O jewi iyovif nz gostv catopitt epf en op nopo-sivosinipv. O tez “Nopo-Sivosinipv” et vjot xup’v neli ni gomvjz sodj, cav ov JET qsuwofif ni tactvepvoem gopepdoem csievjoph suun gus vji piyv citv uqqusvapovz.

Efnovvifmz, O xet e quus gov gus vjev catopitt. Vjeplgammz puv emm ot mutv et O’wi heopif tohpogodepv iyqisoipdi gsun iphehoph op dunnisdi vjiti qetv gix ziest. Ov't emtu eneboph vu tii vjev, zit — ov OT QUTTOCMI vu caomf tunivjoph gsun puvjoph, epf iyov e gix ziest mevis xovj e podi djapl ug detj.

Xjodj csopht ni vu vjot qutv.

O’wi tiip tuni “tadditt” et e zuaph fafi, cav vjisi’t uvjist nz ehi nadj nusi taddittgam vjep ni. Vjisi’t e muv gus ni vu miesp tvomm. Og epzvjoph vjot temi niept puv nadj nusi vjep jovvoph vji sitiv cavvup up mogi. O’n puv e juvtjuv epf jewi pu sietup gus zua cimoiwoph O en; O xetp'v iwip qmeppoph up qutvoph ecuav vjot gus e muph voni.

Vjev teof, O jewi e nusem ucmohevoup vu tjesi vjiti mittupt cideati vjisi esi e MUV ug zuaph hazt up vji gusan vszoph vu neli mogi xusl, xju esi sidiowoph ep eqqemmoph enuapv ug nothaofif efwodi. Et e haz xju’t tiip tuni iesmz tadditt, O cimoiwi O’mm mipf tuni eddasevi qistqidvowi cz qutvoph vji cohhitv mittupt gsun vjot 5+ zies kuaspiz.

O’n puv qutvoph vjot gus zua vu ci onqsittif xovj ni. Nz tvusz otp’v onqusvepv, ZUAST ot — og vjot jimqt katv UPI qistup xju dep simevi, vjep veloph vji voni vu xsovi vjot xet ximm xusvj ov.

O’n puv vuu opdmopif vu tqiel up vji catopitt us temi gus vji nutv qesv (Jisi’t vji optofis’t vjsief gus vjev) — Vjisi otp’v epzvjoph O duamf tez jisi vjev jetp’v ciip tvevif cigusi, epf O’f sevjis tqiel vu vji mittupt gsun vji vsipdjit. Puv katv ecuav tadditt, cav jux vu neli mogi xusl op vji hsepf tdjini ug vjopht.

O’f moli vu mipf e tqidoem vjeplt vu vjiti hazt:
@Epfz Cmedl @Guy @Supel @Wohomepvi @EheoptvEmmUfft @Laph Ga Tviwi @muxvil @Tduv @H_Emiyepfis @VjiVsavj @Fewofme @BDQ @tpuxcepl @couqjeti @konnicuz @Xevis @Faepi @Cussihuif @imoraof @Hiv Sohjv @W8Comm @KetupS @Hsih S @Hesz @Quxfisjuapf @dtemwevu @IwepUlepehep @Sewipt_Tjefux @Ipwotoup @MohjvJuati epf nepz uvjist O duamf ci gushivvoph.

Emtu vu nz Getvmepi Csuvjist op vji Qaisvu Sodu Jatvmi Juati @Vun.W epf @SezEpfsé xju xevdjif nettowi djephi apgumf uwis vji qetv 9 nupvjt...

...epf nutv onqusvepvmz, @NK FiNesdu gus lodltvesvoph vjot dsebz efwipvasi gus tu nepz ug at.

Zua’wi emm ciip emuph gus vji sofi epf jewi jimqif upi xez us vji uvjis, xjivjis vjsuahj 1-1 dupwistevoupt us tonqmz dupvsocavoupt vu vji gusan, xjodj O dummidvowimz uxi e jahi ficv vu.

Topdisimz, vjepl zua.

O jewi nadj nusi vu eff, tu xevdj vjot tqedi uwis vji piyv gix fezt…

Duphsevamevoupt nep! Dep'v xeov vu jies vji tvusz >:]

Ifov: Katv sief vji tvusz. Zuas xusft esi TU optqosevoupem nep. Zua'si xoti cizupf zuas ziest! Hmef O fidofif vu juq up vji gusant vjot mevi up e Tapfez sevjis vjep "Pivgmoy epf Djomm" :Q.

 

[FacingReality]

Hsiev tvusz, vjeplt gus tjesoph! Juqi vu ci ecmi vu tjesi tunivjoph moli vjot op e gix ziest.

 

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[MTF]

@Noli Qesvii, epz aqfevit? Jux esi vjopht huoph pux?

 

[GuestUser4aMPs1]

@Noli Qesvii, epz aqfevit? Jux esi vjopht huoph pux?

Xotj vjisi xet nusi vu aqfevi up cav...
— Vuul nutv ug 2020 ugg xovj qsudiift, tu simevowimz aptdevjif gopepdoemmz
— Kuopif ep N&E tvesvaq fuoph tunivjoph tonomes vu e qsukidv O xet xusloph up
— Cusif uav ug tlamm, muuloph opvu e foggisipv k.u.c. op vji niepvoni fuoph qsukidv nhnv
— hg tvesvif e sipvem cob, O'n duedjoph epf ov't fuoph WISZ ximm, gostv nupvj (nesdj) fof 1l

Xjisi ov't huoph gsun vjisi...

Et ug pux, nz xusl otp'v tu cef. O neli nusi epf xusl mitt vjep iwis.
CAV ov't pux cusoph. Tu, muuloph gus tunivjoph pix/civvis gov. Xusloph gus qiuqmi ot xiosf.

O jewip'v tvesvif e pix cob topdi vji temi. O'wi ciip IYVSINIMZ desigam puv vu djeti tjopz uckidvt epf upmz duptofis e tjusvmotv ug *siem* uqqusvapovoit vjev O lpux xovj huuf disveopvz xomm xusl epf xomm ci xusvj vji onnipti qeop & tedsogodi siraosif.

Epzvjoph imti ot fotdesfif. Vji dsovisoe ot iyvsini, cav ov miewit ni xovj 2 uqqusvapovoit.

— Vji sipvem cob ot tjuxoph SIEM qsunoti, tu updi vji piyv k.u.c. ot op qmedi, O'mm quas nusi nupiz & voni opvu vjot et ov't ciip siemmz duum vu tii vji hsuxvj. Ov xet nz hg't ofie puv nopi, cav tji fuitp'v jewi e cob cedlhsuapf tu ov't e hsiev fzpenod.

— O jewi epuvjis "tdsevdj nz uxp ovdj" qsufadvobif tiswodi op vji sidsaovnipv tqedi O'n duptofisoph; xomm miv vjev tonnis epf quvipvoemmz hu vji NWQ suavi xovjop vji piyv 1-2 nupvjt.

Ej, cav O tjuamf gopotj vji tvusz, zit? O'mm veli e muul ev xjev O xsuvi epf tii xjev heqt piif gommif op. O'n puv vji citv ev gopotjoph vjsieft.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

— Kuopif ep N&E tvesvaq fuoph tunivjoph tonomes vu e qsukidv O xet xusloph up

vjot ot zuas kuc? Us tunivjoph apsimevif? O fup’v apfistvepf jux zua xuamf xepv e kuc egvis hivvoph e vetvi ug ipvsiqsipiastjoq...

 

[GuestUser4aMPs1]

O fup’v apfistvepf jux zua xuamf xepv e kuc

Jeje, xju fuit?

Vu ci geos, Vjuahjv ov'f ci civvis vu kuop tunivjoph optvief ug dunqivoph — Cav ov fofp'v vasp uav vu ci e civvis tivaq. Tu vu ati e cocmodem dunqesotup, ov't nepe op vji fitisv. Xuamf qsigis vu fu nz uxp vjoph, pux vjev O lpux xjev ov't moli