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Worthy Before A Relationship?

Discussion in 'People & Relationships' started by Brendan8450, Aug 10, 2018 at 5:05 AM.

  1. Brendan8450
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    Brendan8450 New Contributor

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    It's something I feel being 33, tiptoeing into being 34.

    It is easy to argue that I have self-esteem issues. Am I ever enough? Blah blah, violin concerto etc.

    BUT..asking a group of business guys who are focussed and driven:

    Do you think the relationship side of our lives is ...you know..."meh"...not thought about?
    Do we party hard and go home?
    Is there any sense of lonliness? Or is it just a social idea that we get together?

    ***
    Personally, I cannot see any relationship until I know I am comfortable financially to support a GF and children. Hell, not even dated/sex in a year.
    ***

    Any tips on how to balance business and new GFs?
     
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  2. Thetaker24
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    Thetaker24 New Contributor

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    If i were you, follow some pickup artists training to built self esteem and be more secure. not only to girls, but also for yourself and in the business world. i also recommend to focus on business and not on girls. Girls/women comes later.

    Adventually if business succeed and still busy with it and there comes a lady in your life. Find your own way to balance that. We cannot tell you how to balance that.
     
  3. Brendan8450
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    Brendan8450 New Contributor

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    Neil Strauss. PUA. etc..Done that. Thanks Taker

    I am asking guys in business...do we postpone relationships? Or is a fleeting "Yeah sweetheart, Love you" then back to it....

    Ethics and moral question...

    BACK STORY:
    My sister engaged to a manager of a MASSIVE retail store. They adopted a boy, my nephew.

    During his time alive he worked till 10pm. I never doubt he was a bad father. I just question how we balance it in our heads....priorities etc...
     
  4. Rick Phillips
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    Rick Phillips Contributor I've Read UNSCRIPTED

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    You must set clear boundaries and stick to them. When you are at work you are at work, when you are spending time with your other half try to be focused on the now.

    If you spend all day at work texting your girlfriend and then all your time with your girlfriend sending work emails then you should expect poor results professionally and personally.
     
  5. Rick Phillips
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    Rick Phillips Contributor I've Read UNSCRIPTED

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    That is serious scripted BS - Working yourself to death for a big corporate, for free. If you are employed then I would discourage anyone from working unpaid overtime. If you are unscripted then by all means work whatever hours you like but your health has to come first.
     
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  6. Tanu1234
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    Tanu1234 New Contributor

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    This sounds similar to my situation.

    After working 5 years in business and getting financial stability, I felt something was meaning.

    I realised that I should set time for personal life ( bf, marriage things).

    We forget sometimes that we are not only business owners but human with heart too.

    Even I have not made any plan but going to off one week ( next week) to plan at least 90 days and in plan, will allocate time for personal life.
     
  7. The Abundant Man
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    The Abundant Man Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane

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    "Give not thy strength unto women not thy ways to that which destroyeth king."-Proverbs 31:3
     
  8. Kung Fu Steve
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    Kung Fu Steve Platinum Contributor Speedway Pass Summit Attendee

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    The two greatest fears we all have are that you're not enough... and if you're not enough you won't be loved.

    Self-esteem comes from being grateful for the good things in your life and understanding you had a part to play in those things but more than that it's recognizing what you don't like so much and changing it.

    When you ask this question you're going to get other's belief systems. What THEY think a relationship should be or what THEY think the purpose of a relationship is...

    The question is what do YOU think a relationship should be? What do YOU want?

    Loneliness is a pattern many entrepreneurs run. I use it as a trigger to reach out to friends and family. Any time I feel "lonely" I have trained myself to reach out. My rationale is that if I'm feeling lonely there's probably many others that are feeling that way in this moment too. I shift the focus from myself to those in need.

    Does that make any sense?

    I think most people believe that if they focus on one thing they have to ignore everything else. What if you were to believe that because of a relationship you had -- you'd be better at what you did?

    I'm not saying adopt that belief... I'm just curious as to how things would change if that were true.
     
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  9. Mainstream7
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    Mainstream7 Bronze Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER

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    I´ve been very lonely as someone who pursued art and entrepreneurship consecutively, honing my skills every day.
    I didn´t get the results I wanted! Something was wrong. I´m starting to reach out to friends and generally take it easy.

    Depression and loneliness is a serious issue. Friends and socialization can give you more happiness, change in perspective, help, etc. etc..
    Having a relationship can be beneficial as mentioned above.
    Work on yourself, both physically, mentally and financially.
     
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2018 at 10:18 AM
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  10. Xeon
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    Xeon Nessuna macchina per me se non una Pagani Read Millionaire Fastlane I've Read UNSCRIPTED FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass

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    Sorry, can't resist, but

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
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  11. SteveO
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    SteveO Legendary Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass LEGENDARY CONTRIBUTOR Summit Attendee

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    The self-esteem part signals that a relationship might be difficult. The biggest reason that someone is not comfortable with themselves is that they are comparing. No value in that.

    Do what you want. That sounds undisciplined and unlike a typical fastlaner. We all do what we want in many ways and then feel guilty about it.

    You are in the process of evaluating what is important to you. Check to see if that lines up with what you "want" to do.

    Quit comparing yourself.
     
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