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Fastlane Why Do YOU Need a Mentor?

Discussion in 'Lessons from Success/Failure' started by SteveO, May 17, 2014.

  1. SteveO
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    SteveO Legendary Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass LEGENDARY CONTRIBUTOR Summit Attendee

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    This mentorship idea is overrated. People work together because they get something out of it.
    I have never sought out a mentor. It is better to look at what others are doing and try to determine what is making them successful. Put those things into practice. Do your own trial and error. Build your business custom fit to you.

    Years ago I was coaching my daughter's softball team. We lost a lot of games in my first season. There were a couple of teams that seemed to have success year after year. I observed some of their practices to gather ideas. I noticed that the kids were always doing something and not just standing on the field waiting for the occasional ball to come to them. Nor were they standing around waiting for a turn at a few swings of the bat.

    It was very obvious to me that repetition was the important part of the equation. How many times do they field the ball, throw the ball, and swing the bat.

    So, I modified my approach. The next season I got five of the parents to COMMIT to being at the practices. I trained each of them on a certain job. I set up stations at the practices. The players rotated through the stations with the coaches. There were swing stations with 2 batting tees where the players repeatedly hit balls into a fence. There was an actual station with a pitching machine where the players would swing at live pitching. Other parents and the kids in that station would shag the balls on the field. There were infield stations where each player would repeatedly get grounders and popups and throw them back. There were pitching stations where I could make sure that each pitcher got at least 100 throws per practice.

    I always finished the practice off with a game of pickle. All players would participate at the same time with multiple stations of three. This game builds endurance, makes the kids think, gives them reasoning skills in action, and makes them throw, catch, tag, run in the heat of the moment.

    Well, my teams started beating these other good teams. I took their concepts and improved on them.

    I applied the same concept to soccer. Even though I did not know much about the sport, my teams were consistently 1st or 2nd place. I took a girls team of 12 year olds to a boys soccer tournament and we won. Left some of the boys crying on the field because they were beat by girls. I never played soccer. Didn't know much about it. Just observed and put into practice.

    This does not mean that you should not take advantage of a mentorship situation when it arises. That would be valuable. All I am saying is that you DON'T NEED ONE.

    I would not even WANT to be mentored by most of the successful people out there. Perhaps take some nuggets away for my own practice.

    We have some fantastic mentors on this forum. They mentor constantly whether you know it or not. Every time that you take an idea from someone and put it into practice, you are being mentored. Even if the idea does not work, you learn something.
     
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  2. Lakeview
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    Lakeview Bronze Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    Good post @SteveO and I agree!

    I also think that many of us see how someone else is becoming successful and try to emulate their path to wealth when it is not really their strength to pursue. By strength I mean it comes naturally based on your personality and traits. Now just because it does not come naturally to you, does not mean you can't do it, but you could probably do something else better and quicker. For example: Some people just can't write. To do so would be a struggle and a long painful road. Some people just have the gift and it just flows.

    Searching for a mentor that has strength in the perceived desired path when you don't is a waste of time for both. So seeking for a mentor based on your perceived path may not be as beneficial as pursuing a path and then through networking, in common interest groups, come across a mentor that you naturally connect with. I agree you don't need one but to have the RIGHT one at the right time can be valuable for both.
     
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  3. SteveO
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    It is my opinion that some people hang their hat on this concept. In reality, they should be looking to leverage off of others. In my example, I could have gone to the other coaches and asked them for their input. There is no way that they would have given me any real advice or come to my practices to help. Perhaps I could have gone to another coach in another league. All that would just waste their time along with mine. I had everything I needed right in front of me.
     
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  4. RogueInnovation
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    RogueInnovation Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    I instantly recognised what you were saying, and agree totally. However, this is one of those awkward situations for me, where I was actually one of the guys that followed the other path.

    My reason for following a mentor was simple, I knew that I needed to improve, and there they were, asking me questions, encouraging me etc, so I played the game and listened.

    Had I gone without mentorship and networks, I would have
    - Not become aware of economics and trading
    - Not become aware of inside info on the top brands in the world (nike, disney, sony yadda yada yadda)
    - Not had structures and quality resources to grind on
    - Not had analogies and comparitive stories to help
    - Not seen how BIG you can really imagine

    When I started business I was so dumb... I tried to learn "what money was" and "why we exhange it" and "where it came from". I was about a year into those really stupid questions when my mentor came along.
    And when he did, I was like "no f'n way!"
    Islands, helicopters, mansions, contacts with the largest influencers in the world.

    My mentor delighted in blowing my f'n head off. "Yo dude, you ever seen this! Don't explode!".
    :jawdrop:

    It was a big fat TEASE. Because at the end of the day he turned around like "so now we've done that, show me what you got". He used to shut down my ideas in three seconds, and I was left like :banghead: left to grind and farm questions, which where all too stupid for him to answer.
    Me all insignificant :sorry:, drowning in my own inability to understand :drowning:, and trying to not be a jelly kneed dummy :nailbiting:

    It left me spinning, but at the end of that time, I put my head down, and GRINDED. I didn't know what I was doing, I din't know where I would go, I just GRINDED. Slowly, I built up layers of sense. Then I started discovering cool stuff, and then went out to test myself.
    Failed, was kinda roughed up, annoyed, etc. And slowly got over it.

    So as much as I agree with the concept of doing it through common sense, I don't think I HAD common sense in regards to business and needed a rude awakening to help me stop running after useless stuff.

    That shock of awareness of a bigger idea, choke slammed me into business.
    And as much as it twisted me inside out and upside down, I had the capacity inside to unravel the chaos and crawl over the line.

    Having a mentor made me dream bigger. And I think that was the whole point.

    But that isn't what MOST people ask for. Most people ask for a mentor to "show them every way to do everything they are afraid of". So I think I totally agree with you, even despite being mentor pile drived myself (was good and full of tough love and "catch up").

    What I liked most about being a protege though, was that I got to learn how to respect dudes who were better than me at what I wanted. Because now I know how to listen, even when my body SCREAMS at me to fight. Thats my favorite part.

    That and, the simple craziness of having learned THAT crazy way, rather than the usual heave ho.
    Was fun :p in a twisted way.

    But yes, mentors to MAKE YOU SUCCEED, is somewhat of a red herring, because only you can do that, and being mentored like I was, I was not garunteed success, I had to earn it. And being so close to the fire, you get angry, and you have to NOT be a d#ck, and you have to earn your own stripes, and you have to do just like you said in the OP.
    You do it with your own steam and smarts, and its satisfying once you have.
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2014
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  5. SteveO
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    SteveO Legendary Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass LEGENDARY CONTRIBUTOR Summit Attendee

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    Aha!!! So we get to the root of the problem. FEAR!

    I am not saying that a mentor cannot help. Obviously they can be extremely valuable. A good mentor is extremely rare!

    All the information is out there if you can see past your nose and get over the fear. Our only limits are the ones that we put on ourselves.
     
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  6. RogueInnovation
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    RogueInnovation Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    Yup, I lucked out like a bandit stumbling into a kings harem.
    But eventually I had to pull my own heavy weight, cuz no one can carry your fear.

    To overcome my fear came in 4 stages:
    - Recognising I had to face learning business
    - Travelling over seas so that I wasn't lazy and stupid about money and forced to make ends meet, get out and around and make contacts
    - Getting pile drived by a mentor
    - Finally stepping up to the plate to swing

    A good mentor is rare, but just as rare is a good student.
    Good students are humble, and fearless.
    I wasn't exactly both.

    I feel that succeeding on your own just pressures you to be fearless and as a result you can be arrogant, but succeeding under someone pressures you to never really show arrogance even at the expence of creating more fear in you. So in some ways, mentors make you face yourself, and you get that added fear.

    I believe that added fear is to make you aware of their fear that you will never make it (because mentors are afraid for you ending up a retard also).
    So, you get this weird feeling, where you have to figure out why they fear you failing.
    I spend quite some time trying to figure out, what I really need to become, in order to be at that place.

    Its ponderous, and it leaves you bewildered by this distant thing, making you fear doing small acts because you might get too comfortable with them, rather than the big boy tasks.
    It makes you more anxious almost.

    But yes, fear is why we want mentors, but if you are WISE, you seek mentors to FACE the fear, and to take on the climb earlier.
    No excuses to f#ck up or delay.


    Ultimately mentors give you an extra fear, a fear of missing out, dissappointing, not being like them, and being a dirty little grub that prefers to live in a hole in the ground rather than see spectacular beauty in business etc.
    But in return, you get a lot to think about, and the possibility to dream bigger than just "getting by".

    Mentors cannot control your financial destiny though, or your personal drive. So it really is up to you what you do with it.
    I imagine that most mentees just sit on their butt and leave the mentor waving his arms in disbelief.
    Most ironically, I think guys who ask for mentors are the most likely to not like being mentored, and will just give up.

    Yup. Also, I feel you can't utilise what you have until you learn to overcome your fears.
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2014
  7. SteveO
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    SteveO Legendary Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass LEGENDARY CONTRIBUTOR Summit Attendee

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    @RogueInnovation . Wow... You are opening a large portal into your inner self.
     
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  8. RogueInnovation
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    RogueInnovation Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    Ha, is that dumb of me?
    I just wanted to give the benefit of what mentorship was like and how it impacted things.
    Also it still confuses me a little, so I benefit from sharing.

    Honesty and vulnerability is my policy, because how can you change your actions if you never assess them honestly?



    Btw, sometimes it is the mentors who envy US, and sometimes, they teach us things to recapture that moment of possibility, of choice. And they wanna play with the idea of who they might become if they had known different things.

    Through being mentored, I learnt to, remove my envy of younger guys with "more options" and just understand, that there is this universal playing field where everyone is much more equal than they think.
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2014
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  9. Grimaldo
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    Copy what others are doing has a fundamental problem, that you don't know why you are doing, the things that you are doing.

    You can copy everything in Amazon, or you can copy when they send emails or how often, but you don't know why they are doing it, because you don't have their data. You don't know have know/how, so you don't have value, and the most important thing is value.

    A mentor can reduce a lot of years your learning curve. Of course you don't need them to success, they even want to tech guys who are going to succeed anyway, but you can do it in 20, 10 or 5 years.

    Have you been mentored? If you don't, you cannot compare and say so easily that you don't need a mentor. Saying you don't need a mentor will depend on the variables. If time is an important variable, you need a mentor.
     
  10. oldscool
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    oldscool Bronze Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    I could be naive even at my advanced age, but, to me a mentors, meetings, masterminds waste time if you dont know what to ask. The reason is if you dont have questions already in hand you will need to constantly contact someone for answers and noone is going to be at your beck and call at any hours of the night to cater to your questions. It is just faster and for speed to get going and dont worry about all the other stuff. I even find myself falling into this behavior with little questions I ask on here. Waiting on answers can be a time suck.

    Just my rambles.
     
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  11. SteveO
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    SteveO Legendary Contributor FASTLANE INSIDER Speedway Pass LEGENDARY CONTRIBUTOR Summit Attendee

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    It is important to fully understand whatever you are doing. I am suggesting that you pay attention to the leaders and leverage what processes make them successful into your business.


    There are a lot of challenges with finding a mentor. If you have one, we all would be happy to hear of your experiences. The only opportunities that I have had in my business would be to actually go to work for someone. Seems to me that I would be slowed even more by this process than by doing without one. I understand my business very well because I pay attention and apply what I learn from others. I evaluate what others do constantly and try to figure out why it does or doesn't make sense.

    I have never met anyone that was willing to work with me as a mentor in my business. I feel like there is a lot of dishonesty and cut-throats that I would not want to be associated with.

    The biggest hole in my process is with raising money for deals. I have some experience but not a lot. The only way that I know how to develop myself here would be either to work for someone, or to dig in and learn the ropes. I can't imagine someone having motivation to show me how to compete with them.

    There are a limited amount of people that have some type of mentor program like we see around here.

    So many people seem to feel that they need to have one in order to get started. I worked on jobs in the past that seemed to require a lot of training. Some people would complain that they don't get enough training or mentoring from others. There were some people that would not look for the mentoring but would just dig in and excel.

    My point to this post is not that you should not use a mentor. It is that you don't need to make that a requirement to move forward at full speed. Leverage!
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2014
  12. RogueInnovation
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    RogueInnovation Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    The way I see it is in terms of ego and validation.
    In the martial arts there are two style types, "hard" and "soft". Hard uses the external in a very efficient way, maximising strength and leverage. Soft, is an internal form that requires a longer time to master, that fights the ego first before it moves and so eventually becomes wiser and more formidable strategically (longer endurance, better balance, efficient force, larger perspective and more control of exact outcome).

    Hard styles "get you there", soft styles get "exact outcomes", through the control of ego manifestation (timing, ebb and flow, centralisation, equal and opposite reactions, and redirection).

    Now in biz, money is external outcome, and brand or stability of a business opportunity is more internal. The most satisfying result is to have enough money (hard enough) and to create stability where you want it (soft enough).

    When people want a mentor, they ALWAYS want MONEY it seems, and want survival, but what mentors want, is for the student to focus on the internal (and only as much external as will get them feeling confident). They are striving for an efficiency of investment and result, so that the student can achieve a more ideal outcome.

    Now, regarding, what you mention in the OP,
    I think that being without a mentor can lead you to "perfect the fringes" with your own unique balance of external/internal that exactly matches how DETERMINED you were from a flat footed start.
    While being with a mentor can lead in MANY directions
    - You try to learn how to get money faster and try to compete with them and burn the bridge
    - You try to do what they say without any spine or ability to succeed on your own steam (they get tired of you fast)
    - You use their wisdom to help you do enough external stuff, require less money, require less proof of how good you are, compete less, defeat your ego, retain a greater balance in the internal, and have time to focus on better perfecting ideals, and inner satisfaction and confidence
    - Try to steal their stuff
    - Peel off because you couldn't handle the heat and slowly settle back down into a weaker station (most common)
    - Open something that is really cool, that makes your mentor be like "d#mn! I have a new helpful contact!" (happens now and then)

    I think it is crucial to achieve what you say in this thread, for all the positive outcomes, but I believe that a mentor can make the difference in getting you away from the fringes, and can redirect your determination, so that it goes beyond its initial motivation and strikes closer to a bullseye.

    I feel like most people do not seek a mentor for these reasons however. The reason they seek a mentor is for money, less fear, and an easier road. But if they do that, they will not achieve the better results underneath their mentor.

    So what you say here is crucial as a part of the process of directing yourself towards, satisfaction and success, with and without mentors.
    My only addition, is that mentors have a positive side too, and that this positive side requires a couple more skills than a keen eye.

    The additional skills you need is
    Money vs internal stability, balance
    Handling the emotional turmoil that comes from changing your life direction
    Removing green eyed mindsets, and removing antagonism, laziness, competitiveness on command
    Keeping your creative spark, and developing your keen eye (like you said)
    An understanding of perspective, of ego adjustment, communication skills (with those better than you)

    And these lessons are hidden within EVERYTHING your mentor does (if you pay attention and are clever enough to decipher it).
    And they actually are AWARE they are teaching you these things, so you have to lastly learn that, they WERE responsible for giving you the opportunity to learn all the above skills.


    I suppose I mention my understanding of mentorship because I am in a way trying to learn to appreciate that my mentor was the one that gave me those opportunities.
    I was responsible for LEARNING them and deciphering them, but without a mentor, I would have floated on the fringes, and been flat footed.

    Additionally,
    I see loads of people here who are flat footed (its kinda depressing actually), and it has caused me to realise that, being without a mentor makes you more "malleable" to circumstances.
    So with or without a mentor, we ALL have to accept the responsibility for the malleability of our life.

    My mentor made me much more aggressive. Because essentially, he forced me to face "what I was losing", or "what I was avoiding" regarding the malleability of myself and my life. I was aggressive due to not knowing how to handle having no knowledge. Afraid that I'd get things wrong and make STUPID choices.

    Ultimately, you have to see beyond your uncertainty and realise that you are actually a fortunate person, who has the opportunity to observe the whole scene with objectivity. And you have to realise how much power that gives you. To respect it, and to be humble.

    We are all struggling to overcome our own internal limitations and to perfect a feeling of satisfaction, and we use whatever we have to achieve that. How WELL we do, is up to how we use the opportunities given to us.


    I leapt at my mentor opportunity because I sensed immediately that it was KEY, for me and would allow me to get into the business world with less wounds to lick.
    I was kinda wrong though, because I ended up with plenty of wounds to lick anyways. And since then I have realised that its really all a slieght of hand. Designed to trick you to either give up, or to make the best of yourself.

    Haha, I'm glad I did the later.


    Sorry for the wall of text, I don't understand it all well enough to be as eloquent as I would like :smuggy:

    I suppose I am really just saying, that we all must face our malleable nature, and decide to conquer it. Mentorship allows an objective viewpoint on that task, where normally you are left to be subjective about it due to circumstances.

    I FEEL that you can milk a mentorship opportunity to achieve a better balance for your life.
    Though, to achieve that, you must be up to the task (and it is no easy task)

    So...
    It really depends, will you step up in either scenario and succeed?
    If you won't succeed alone, you have a chance to succeed with others. But if you are flat lazy, it doesn't matter which path you choose, you are screwed anyways.


    Massive props to my mentor for penetrating my stupid haze and getting me going. It worked just fine for me x)
    But massive props to those who didn't need that (I absolutely needed it unfortunately, but have made up for that by learning about the mentor process and humility)
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2014
  13. Nadia
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    Ah. A mentor.

    I am a Certified Business Mentor and that sounds REALLY nice to say, but it means nothing to me. It's a piece of paper. Real mentorship comes from LIFE EXPERIENCE.

    I currently mentor two people and they came to me and put forward a proposal of WHY they wanted ME to mentor them. They adore my straight forward, no nonsense BS style and the way I am able to bust through blocks, barriers and barricades of the human mind. I value the time I spend with them, creating a powerful being out of them. It is incredible.

    For years, I never had a mentor. Life mentored me *laughs*. Life effed me up SO bad, that I took no choice but to learn from it.

    However, recently, as much as I learned, I desire more. I was HUNGRY for more. So I directly asked God to stumble across someone who would be th perfect match for me and I promised I wouldn't be stubborn when I found him/her.

    I found him a while back and the first interaction blew my mind. I'm not a woman who is often impressed by someone however THIS mentor of mine, made me jump for joy. I presented a very bold and direct request of mentorship, explained I had requested it from God and it turned up. He was amazed I knew the DIFFERENCE between coaching and mentorship. A mentor will literally SHIFT the way you perceive yourself and the world, at large. Within 2 months, I made more money than ever, I had a FULL in-depth scalable blueprint to run both my businesses, had an enhanced and deeper emotional relationship with my boyfriend, forgave anything that held me back and made me think SO BIG, it is incredible. I am so honoured he has partnered with people like Marie Forleo, Eban Pagan, Tony Robbins, Dan Kennedy etc etc to name a few.

    A mentor isn't for everyone. However, if you are SERIOUS about learning and serious about putting it into practice, then it is a pre-requisite.
     
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  14. Synz
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    Everyone I meet is my mentor. Take something from every situation - there's so much to learn, and an opportunity to gain knowledge should never be wasted.
     
  15. IAmTheJeff
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    This is how I try to approach mentorship. I have interactions with quite a few people in different walks of life and business. This forum as a whole actually serves as a mentor to me.

    I don't believe a mentor has to necessarily be a singular person that you interact with regularly, The tidbits of wisdom from proven individuals, when considered properly, can absolutely provide what a single mentor can offer and much more.

    All of the legendary contributors here, plus many others that have either been successful in business or have the proper mindset, each serve as a mentor to me, although I've had actual interaction with very few.

    @SteveO's OP is the exact way to approach mentorship, IMO. Creating success for yourself should be a prerequisite to obtaining outside guidance. Most people won't find a mentor until you've proven yourself worthy of him/her spending their time. Why? Because hand holding doesn't make a strong entrepreneur, it creates someone to babysit.
     
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  16. SteveO
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    This is why we struggle at all.
     
  17. SteveO
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    I realize that it is easier if you have a mentor. Someone that would be available to you to answer questions as they come up. Someone that is there to prod you in the right direction. Someone that will slap you when you need slapping. Where are these people? What motivation would a person have to take an interest in your business or in you? Perhaps there are a FEW people out there that you could build a relationship with that might help to these levels. But, there are not many.

    What is stopping us from letting go of the mental barriers? What is stopping us from seeing the process in clarity?

    We are.
     
  18. Lakeview
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    I agree, a mentor being an experienced and trusted adviser can reduce a lot of years in the learning curve. I'm getting the impression this discussion is about a mentor for a long term process. Mentor can be short term and extremely valuable, to the point @Grimaldo made.

    I am working with a mentor helping me in some real estate knowledge while I mentor him with some marketing strategies with another one of his businesses. I did not seek him but we crossed paths and will save us both years of trial and error. This is an ideal relationship for both of us.

    Totally agree!!!
     
  19. randomnumber314
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    Great post. I had a mentor once, great woman who created her own landscaping company in Tuscon Arizona. Well I wasted her time because I was so afraid of screwing anything up that I never did anything. We had weekly calls where I asked question after question about trivial things. (How much for a logo...) Eventually we stopped talking, and I got a job.

    It's way to easy to think you have a roadmap for success with a mentor. You don't. You have to just start moving. Start something. Screw up a thing or two. Get into a situation you don't understand and figure it out. I shadowed a guy in my business for a week prior to opening my doors. He's doing well, but he does things differently than I do things. It was good to see someone else do it, but there's no reason to try and copy them completely--everyone's in different situations.

    So yes, observe what is helping others be successful, but don't think you're going to copy them exactly and never make a mistake.
     
  20. markonestock
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    markonestock New Contributor

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    But why would any successful business,man bother mentoring any-one? i know all the typical excuses but I don't think any really add up. Running a business and teaching people, how to are different.
     
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  21. Iammelissamoore
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    Iammelissamoore Silver Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane I've Read UNSCRIPTED Speedway Pass

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    Hey @SteveO totally hear you loud and clear. I see mentoring happening in a lot of ways, some people like working directly with someone, some people look on an learn from the distance. I believe mentoring is important whichever way most people choose to have it done. I specifically do just as you have mentioned, I like that concept of "reverse engineering" and I go backwards on the Process one followed, to where they began. I specifically like paying attention to where they began. A lot of times, people believe luck brought successful people to where they are and being in this community, we know better. Anyone is capable of success, specifically if they are willing to put in the work and build that process.

    Nice word shared on mentorship!
     
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  22. Iammelissamoore
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    Iammelissamoore Silver Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane I've Read UNSCRIPTED Speedway Pass

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    You are absolutely correct about fear. This was one of the greatest exercises I had to go through. However, I recognised my fears could actually work for me instead of against me.

    Whenever I got fearful and timid of doing something great, I'd go through the self-pitying. "Melissa, you're not good enough," "You're not worth it." and all that crap, but then, I recognised, it'd change to, "you deserve it," "you have to do this," "it won't get any easier, but you could still kick a$$" and I'd go do whatever I set out to. Fear can actually work For you.
     
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  23. Rawr
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    Rawr Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    Me - "Hey man, you're successull, wanna be my mentor?"
    Mentor - "Ok."
    Me -"I don't know what I want to do with my life."
    Mentor - "What do you like?"
    Me - "this and this and I'm this many years old."
    Mentor - "Then you should probably <generic advice> and you should get moving man, don't waste time!"
    Me, thinking - "I thought I was going to get some amazing advice."


    My friend's mentor told him to suck it up and keep working at a job he hated, because that's what everyone else does until they get to mgmt.


    I think you need a mentor when you're already started at something and just want to see if there is anything you don't know and haven't considered. Unless you're at that point where you've tasted success and know how to do things yourself a bit, you're reaching for air.
     
  24. Iammelissamoore
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    Iammelissamoore Silver Contributor Read Millionaire Fastlane I've Read UNSCRIPTED Speedway Pass

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    I love how you mentioned the difference between mentoring and coaching @Nadia . There is a fine line. The No BS approach is the best way to push through as it really shows one up for the nonsense they're doing that will keep them back. I believe that is why we all believe too that MJ's book knocks all other business books off the shelf. His No BS approach is a wake up call to action. You are certainly correct.

    Cheers on great mentorship!
     
  25. RogueInnovation
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    RogueInnovation Gold Contributor Speedway Pass

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    Haha
    Thats why its better to get mentors talking.
    They can't solve your problems, only spot them, and give analogies or examples from their life.


    I feel conflicted about my mentorship now, very conflicted
    1) Cuz I am an a##hole
    2) Cuz on some level I gave away my ballsiness
    3) Cuz it isn't always clear what was said for them and what was said for me (maybe 20% for me?)

    My mentor is one successful guy, not just financially but also his thoughts are awesome. I loved his ideas, they are cool, I just wasn't on board with some attitudes (cuz I'm an a##hole and maybe don't understand).

    Mentors are kind of scary, an at some point you do have to stand on your own, and process all your weird thoughts about the relationship.
    My guy came to ME, cuz he knew I was one capable cat just not at business.
    The trick for me now is understanding how he expected me to perform in the business world without the usual rhetoric (you'll make it if you apply yourself).

    My mentor doesn't know, nobody does.
    They oonly believe what they see.

    I recommend giving a mentor no bigger than a 20% role in your success (or business), cuz thats about the effort they'll apply.
    And to surprise the rhetoric out of them with results
     

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