The Entrepreneur Forum | Startups | Entrepreneurship | Starting a Business | Motivation | Success

What UNSCRIPTED Can Teach Copywriters ..

Remove ads while supporting the Unscripted philosophy...become an INSIDER.

Lex DeVille

Sweeping Shadows from Dreams
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jan 14, 2013
3,300
21,324
4,306
The Underground
Day by day. Chapter by chapter .. I'm reading Unscripted a little at a time. And it occurred to me as I read there's more to learn from the book than what you take from the core message. It's something a lot of copywriters (or wannabe copywriters) could benefit from.

It's MJ's writing style.

The book has high ratings. A lot of people absorb into Unscripted like water to a sponge. Pulled like gravity toward a message that relates. So I wanted to talk about a few key elements I've noticed so far (bear in mind I'm only about 8 chapters deep) that can help you write better copy.

1. EVERY SENTENCE TELLS A MINI-STORY

Pay close attention to every word and every line, you start to notice a pattern. Notice how the words weave and flow like a Viper hugs curves at Nuremberg. Every sentence is a piece of the bigger puzzle. A mini-story within the story. As you read, (unless you listen) images form in your mind with every line. And the more you get into the book, the more the picture comes to life. Soon you don't just relate to MJ's words. You live his words, because it tells your story, and that's why you're compelled to break free.

2. EVERY SENTENCE IS FOR A SPECIFIC GROUP OF PEOPLE

Unscripted doesn't read quite like TMF. It's more sophisticated. More complex. The ideas and metaphors seem targeted toward an older audience. An aging audience who's sick of corporate prisons and life's traditional paths. Doesn't mean younger guys can't get something from it. But the audience is HIGHLY targeted and for that reason, Unscripted isn't scattered and all over the place. Instead, the message is tight, agitating reader pains like a thumb pressed into a bullet wound. It's the difference between a "spray and pray" machine gunner and a "one shot one kill" sniper. MJ is a sniper.

3. IT'S SUBTLE AND DOESN'T TRY TO SELL YOU

Unscripted isn't a direct response sales letter. There's no "Click Here for My Forum" or "Buy Membership Now!" (At least through CH. 8) Instead, copy tactics fly under the radar. Persuasive techniques abound, but they're hidden under an invisibility cloak. For instance, when MJ first mentions the forum, there's no link. It doesn't need one. It's just a seed. Planted in your mind so you can think about it later. Unscripted is like food for the starving man who's adapted to being hungry. He doesn't realize how hungry he is until he takes the first bite, then another, and another, and soon what was empty is now full. This isn't just about being subtle, it's about not having to push the sale because the material, like food, is valuable.

There's a lot budding copywriters can learn from Unscripted. Copy isn't just about persuasion and direction. It considers the audience and their story -- the one they want to read, and the one they secretly tell themselves on the inside. It hits home because it's truth, and it shows a path to something greater.

Anyway, I thought it might be a cool discussion.
So what else can you learn from Unscripted about copy? Thoughts?
 

Don't like ads? Remove them while supporting the forum. Subscribe.

ZF Lee

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 27, 2016
2,373
4,194
1,026
22
Malaysia
Each and every story are backed by FACTS.
SCRIPTED bullshit on investing? Backed up not only by the Iggy Investor tale, but also with utopian chart comparisons and the Anton and Muhammad Islam news fiascos.

UNSCRIPTED business mechanisms? Uses Likwid, Vigilante and Biophase (I think he's the guy who MJ mentioned in the Amazon discussions) who are real life Fastlaners whose stories are available at the forum. Even cites them in the appendix.

Copy works very well with facts that have cause and effect. It's solid validation consumers can trust. These days people are bombarded by lots of information, so they tend to be more selective these days.

I'm glad MJ took the time to write UNSCRIPTED rather than just be like the RDPD books...I regret I bought Retire Rich, Retire Young..it was not only fluff, but full of 'hearsay'. Very little hard facts. Now if only I could toss the damn book into the trash like @Vigilante did with the Galdwell book :playful: That was before TMF though.
 

Lex DeVille

Sweeping Shadows from Dreams
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jan 14, 2013
3,300
21,324
4,306
The Underground
It's solid validation consumers can trust. @Vigilante did with the Galdwell book :playful:

Facts. Real world experience. Validatable content. I think those are really good points. Especially from the coaching side of the house. All these new coaches coming on the seen are told to "teach with case studies" but there's a problem with case studies because they get tossed out there without any proof to back them up.

"Sandy's life completely transformed 2 weeks after working with me."

1. Wtf does that even mean?
2. Sandy will, of course, back this up due to pressure, but would others who know her say the same?
3. Thanks to fake news and certain people in certain positions, vagueness and unverifiable "truths" leave a bad taste in the mouth.
4. MJ's material is literally backed by thousands and thousands of validating statements by people you can actually meet!
 

ZF Lee

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 27, 2016
2,373
4,194
1,026
22
Malaysia
Facts. Real world experience. Validatable content. I think those are really good points. Especially from the coaching side of the house. All these new coaches coming on the seen are told to "teach with case studies" but there's a problem with case studies because they get tossed out there without any proof to back them up.

"Sandy's life completely transformed 2 weeks after working with me."

1. Wtf does that even mean?
2. Sandy will, of course, back this up due to pressure, but would others who know her say the same?
3. Thanks to fake news and certain people in certain positions, vagueness and unverifiable "truths" leave a bad taste in the mouth.
4. MJ's material is literally backed by thousands and thousands of validating statements by people you can actually meet!
And the only way to get the facts is a productocracy.
You help people get what they need, they give you feedback.
Case studies, market research, they all are fueled by solving customer needs. Case studies work. But they must be with the right sampling of people, the necessary tools and the right environmental settings like technology, economical challenges, etc.

The weaknesses to the Sandy message might be suitably called the extranous variables, which are factors other than manipulated variables which are not the bread and butter of the scenerio. As for the fake news, it can be a confounding variable, as it has a huge unexpected impact that leads the message to deceive people rather than help them as supposed. Both classes of variables cannot be controlled as you cannot infer cause or effect.

Business is already uncertain enough. Let's us not have too many variables that we cannot control.
 

GMSI7D

Gold Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jan 27, 2016
993
1,938
547
44
Lyon, France
3. IT'S SUBTLE AND DOESN'T TRY TO SELL YOU


anyway, i think people who read that kind of book are already pre sold in some ways


for example, i don't care about books for women : novel , romance

reading that kind of books is a nightmare for most guys

i will never read such books unless i have a specific reason to do that


same thing for MJ DeMarco's readers

they are already pre sold.
 

ZF Lee

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 27, 2016
2,373
4,194
1,026
22
Malaysia
anyway, i think people who read that kind of book are already pre sold in some ways


for example, i don't care about books for women : novel , romance

reading that kind of books is a nightmare for most guys

i will never read such books unless i have a specific reason to do that


same thing for MJ DeMarco's readers

they are already pre sold.
Pre sold or not, it has been validated as a brilliant read even by the more veteran Fastlaners. VALIDATION. And you should look at the bulk of the comments on Amazon, they are positive and not even from only Forumers! I know because I sometimes stop by!

And well done @MJ DeMarco ...I never see a book like yours get 101 reviews with near 5 stars overall rating in TWO f*ckING MONTHS (including this month). Most business books get like 16 or 20 or 50 across three years or so even with all that expensive marketing and landing pages.

I'm very proud to see one of your best works blossom before my eyes. I just started reading your progress thread and I love the process behind it.

I was heckled and teased by many others for choosing to read your book, but I know that there was always a story behind it. And that story is beautiful. Very beautiful.
upload_2017-6-28_21-29-32.png
 

Lex DeVille

Sweeping Shadows from Dreams
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jan 14, 2013
3,300
21,324
4,306
The Underground
i will never read such books unless i have a specific reason to do that

This "never" statement can only be proven not true, so I have to disregard it.
If you find a good enough reason to read a novel or romance, then you will.

Not everyone is pre-sold on MJ's books. Some get handed the book and told, "hey you should read this," so they do and they end up here (or not). Some discover it by accident. Some read the previous book and wanted more.

Pre-selling is also part of copywriting, but I wasn't referencing how the book is sold. I was talking about how the information inside is sold to the reader -- the idea of the Script / Unscripted lifestyle and also other ideas such as making one's way to this forum after reading.

This isn't a direct response vs. non-direct response battle. It's just observing points that may be useful for those on the copywriter's path. Noting what works well within the pages of the book, and finding ways to apply it within our businesses.
 
Last edited:

MJ DeMarco

Administrator
Staff member
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
Jul 23, 2007
30,923
114,377
3,751
Fountain Hills, AZ
You live his words, because it tells your story, and that's why you're compelled to break free.

The introductory material (before TUNEF) is my attempt to make an emotional connection with the reader. I felt I was taking a risk in being so laborious in explaining the SCRIPTED mechanisations, but at the end of the day, I thought I needed to be laborious. The critics of TMF felt the front of the book was too long and unneeded -- I thought their criticism was so valid that I repeated that same "mistake" in UNSCRIPTED.

bear in mind I'm only about 8 chapters deep

Well I hope the later chapters deliver! And as much analysis!
 

ZF Lee

Platinum Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 27, 2016
2,373
4,194
1,026
22
Malaysia
The introductory material (before TUNEF) is my attempt to make an emotional connection with the reader. I felt I was taking a risk in being so laborious in explaining the SCRIPTED mechanisations, but at the end of the day, I thought I needed to be laborious. The critics of TMF felt the front of the book was too long and unneeded -- I thought their criticism was so valid that I repeated that same "mistake" in UNSCRIPTED.
It's not a mistake.
You are writing for humans. We need emotion to understand any message for meaning and purpose. That is the essence of copy.
Not everyone likes coffee.
 

Sponsored Offers

  • Sticky
MARKETPLACE You Are One Call Away From Living Your Dream Life - LightHouse’s Accountability Program ⚡
This program helped me to triple my revenue over 7 months while also moving to a new city in the...
  • Sticky
MARKETPLACE Fox Web School "Legend" Group Coaching Program 2020
Hi Fox, After reading your threat and watching some of your youtube I have several query ? 1...
  • Sticky
MARKETPLACE Lex DeVille's - Advanced Freelance Udemy Courses!
If you read the last message then you know I'm removing my courses from Udemy next month. You...
  • Sticky
MARKETPLACE Grow Your Business With a Book (An Unorthodox Marketing Strategy That Built One of the Largest...
PS. what do you think about the idea of setting up live Busking experiences on Air BNB? I could...
  • Sticky
FEATURED! Introducing... WEALTH EXPO$ED, A Short Story By MJ DeMarco
Hi Mj, I just bought it. And reading it. I think is a great idea to write using the stories to...
  • Sticky
MARKETPLACE Kill Bigger Incubator
@Kak Thanks for the reply. Whats interesting is that I have an idea that's been cooking which...



Forum Sponsor

sponsor

New Topics

Fastlane Insiders

View the forum AD FREE.
Private, unindexed content
Detailed process/execution threads
Monthly conference calls with doers
Ideas needing execution, more!

Join Fastlane Insiders.

Top Bottom