The five people you are surrounded with..

[AndrewNC]

A new twist on an old concept:

"the five people that surround you are the average of the actions you take and the mindset you have"

This is an interesting concept that came to mind as I'm currently 20% through my NLP Master Practitoner training.

It's a play on words from the old "you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with".

The trainer was talking about "perception is projection" and how our life around us outside of our bodies is a result of what occurs on the inside. He framed it up in a 100% literal (quantum physics) sense.

The purpose of the lecture was to give us a higher level of personal accountability.

Then I realized that the "five people" in my life usually came about only when I took the actions necessary to be at the level they were at.

When I went to my first B&P (fine...Fastlane Summit), I met three other fastlaners in the same shoes as me and we all were in the same stage of life as eachother...going through the same struggles.

But they only came into my network because of the actions I took. Then, when we all took action- a multi-millionaire mentor came into our life. But ONLY after we took action and we're ready.

So I'm coming to believe that the goal is NOT to simply seek out people to surround ourself with (example; "I'm new here - can MJ mentor me!?) but to transform into the person first and then know others will surround you.

I think I heard it before as "when the student is ready, the mentor appears"

I now view this at a literal level. Master prac is some trippy stuff

Has anyone noticed this in their life where people appear at just the right times?

 

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[jon.a]

A new twist on an old concept:

"the five people that surround you are the average of the actions you take and the mindset you have"

This is an interesting concept that came to mind as I'm currently 20% through my NLP Master Practitoner training.

It's a play on words from the old "you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with".

The trainer was talking about "perception is projection" and how our life around us outside of our bodies is a result of what occurs on the inside. He framed it up in a 100% literal (quantum physics) sense.

The purpose of the lecture was to give us a higher level of personal accountability.

Then I realized that the "five people" in my life usually came about only when I took the actions necessary to be at the level they were at.

When I went to my first B&P (fine...Fastlane Summit), I met three other fastlaners in the same shoes as me and we all were in the same stage of life as eachother...going through the same struggles.

But they only came into my network because of the actions I took. Then, when we all took action- a multi-millionaire mentor came into our life. But ONLY after we took action and we're ready.

So I'm coming to believe that the goal is NOT to simply seek out people to surround ourself with (example; "I'm new here - can MJ mentor me!?) but to transform into the person first and then know others will surround you.

I think I heard it before as "when the student is ready, the mentor appears"

I now view this at a literal level. Master prac is some trippy stuff

Has anyone noticed this in their life where people appear at just the right times?

yes

 

[PureA]

I've experienced this recently, in hindsight I can see I wasn't ready beforehand despite the frustration at the time.

 

[Yoda]

Then I realized that the "five people" in my life usually came about only when I took the actions necessary to be at the level they were at.

My dad used to take me to the racetrack when I was younger. I have very fond memories of it. It was loud, aggressive, and exciting, with cars constantly battling it out to pass the guy in front of them.

It's not like on television where it's little more than background noise and a scrolling positional marquee across the top. Oh no. You could feel the cars.

There was a phrase many guys would use when a car in the pole position would separate themselves from the pack. It was called checking out.

In other words, he had more or less already won because he was going so fast, it would take an outside force like a caution flag or his own accident to derail him from the podium.

But.. isn't that life?

Think about any business as a competition. A race. Put yourself on a track with all your competitors. Are the nearest 5 not those other competitors who are going close to the same speed as you?

If you want to advance your position, the only way to do so is to go faster. The faster you go, the more competition you pass, and suddenly you have a new nearest 5. The slowest person in your circle is now out of the 5, and you've acquired a new target ahead of you. In this way, you'll always have someone ahead, and someone just behind.

It's cyclical, and can't be broken. Positions will change throughout the race, and things will happen where some guys can't finish, and others out perform. And, unfortunately, even when you get ahead of everyone, there's still 4 people hot on your tail.

Unless you check out.

Well.. then what?

Ask Tony Stewart about what happened when he checked out over and over and over in Sprint Cars. Eventually, there was nothing else he could do to advance himself in his current situation.

No matter what, as long as he stayed the course, he would never reach what most would consider the pinnacle of racing. Nascar.

So he moved up. He took on a bigger stage. He took on a new car, new style of racing, and much, much bigger prizes. Now, every race, he'd have a new closest 5. But he had to earn it. He had to build the right relationships, with new owners, new team mates, and new fans.

Lessons to be learned:

• You always have a 5.
• You, for the most part, control that 5, based on how your speed (action).
• At some point, you may have to take a leap, when you're ready, and get a fresh new 5. But it will take great action, and maybe even some risk.

 

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[MattR82]

Jesus.. I remember hearing about this awhile back but it was long forgotten. Does not fill me with confidence in my current situation. A great reminder.

 

[Dangeruss]

Great observations...I wonder if we can also define ourselves by the 5 people we are trying to avoid at all times!

 

[dompie85]

@AndrewNC First off, I must say, your youtube videos are great. You speak logically and with clarity.
This is a great topic and I can totally reflect to it with my current situation. "You are the average of the 5 people you surround yourself with"
These 5 are my true good friends, but they're not the best influence on my progress. And needless to say, I am in the market for a mentor, lol.
I've been trying to find a new 5 with networking events and chamber of commerce, nothing ever seems to stick...
"When the student is ready, the mentor appears" Been trying hard and still waiting... I'll try to find some threads on this, maybe i'm doing it wrong, haha!
Great post!

 

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[LateStarter]

My dad used to take me to the racetrack when I was younger. I have very fond memories of it. It was loud, aggressive, and exciting, with cars constantly battling it out to pass the guy in front of them.

It's not like on television where it's little more than background noise and a scrolling positional marquee across the top. Oh no. You could feel the cars.

There was a phrase many guys would use when a car in the pole position would separate themselves from the pack. It was called checking out.

In other words, he had more or less already won because he was going so fast, it would take an outside force like a caution flag or his own accident to derail him from the podium.

But.. isn't that life?

Think about any business as a competition. A race. Put yourself on a track with all your competitors. Are the nearest 5 not those other competitors who are going close to the same speed as you?

If you want to advance your position, the only way to do so is to go faster. The faster you go, the more competition you pass, and suddenly you have a new nearest 5. The slowest person in your circle is now out of the 5, and you've acquired a new target ahead of you. In this way, you'll always have someone ahead, and someone just behind.

It's cyclical, and can't be broken. Positions will change throughout the race, and things will happen where some guys can't finish, and others out perform. And, unfortunately, even when you get ahead of everyone, there's still 4 people hot on your tail.

Unless you check out.

Well.. then what?

Ask Tony Stewart about what happened when he checked out over and over and over in Sprint Cars. Eventually, there was nothing else he could do to advance himself in his current situation.

No matter what, as long as he stayed the course, he would never reach what most would consider the pinnacle of racing. Nascar.

So he moved up. He took on a bigger stage. He took on a new car, new style of racing, and much, much bigger prizes. Now, every race, he'd have a new closest 5. But he had to earn it. He had to build the right relationships, with new owners, new team mates, and new fans.

Lessons to be learned:

• You always have a 5.
• You, for the most part, control that 5, based on how your speed (action).
• At some point, you may have to take a leap, when you're ready, and get a fresh new 5. But it will take great action, and maybe even some risk.

Finally! A racing analogy! This is something I can definitely relate to.

Why can I relate to it? I have been fortunate to have worked my way into professional racing as crew thanks to people coming into my life at the right time. I can name a handful of people that helped me at various stages; each introducing me to "a new 5". I've been a part of championship winning teams and won several prestigious events along the way. This isn't meant as a humblebrag, but merely to give some context.

I've always been grateful for those opportunities. I have tried to give back what I could to others by 'paying it forward'. I've helped bring new people into the sport and connected good people with good teams to strengthen the combination. I even created a business around it at one point. I've had a fairly full racing career and left it behind a few years ago to pursue other things. It was time for this fish to find a new pond.

Unfortunately I don't think I've yet made these kinds of connections in my business life aside from the 'virtual mentors' here. I'm not far along this journey though and I feel I've finally turned a corner and am onto something that will be life changing.

I'll be attending the Summit this year (beg, borrow and steal a ticket if necessary) and hope to grow my connections while giving back to my new 5 in the process. Everyone has a story and I look forward to hearing many at the Summit while making new connections.

 

[Vigilante]

Too bad we can't change this to the 100 people...

[HASHTAG]#fastlanesummit[/HASHTAG]

 

[Torobaro]

Great observations...I wonder if we can also define ourselves by the 5 people we are trying to avoid at all times!

I´ve also thought about this and in my view it´s much better to be defined by who we surround ourselves with VS who we try to avoid. Both situations take action and focus but in one of them (surrounding yourself with 5 people) the benefits will be far greater than if you try to avoid people. It´s also easier to avoid someone instead of "chasing someone´s company" and what you think you tend to attract, so if you´re thinking of avoiding someone that person ends up showing up, at least in your mind.

That´s more or less working for me, but then again we are all different.

 

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[Dangeruss]

I´ve also thought about this and in my view it´s much better to be defined by who we surround ourselves with VS who we try to avoid. Both situations take action and focus but in one of them (surrounding yourself with 5 people) the benefits will be far greater than if you try to avoid people. It´s also easier to avoid someone instead of "chasing someone´s company" and what you think you tend to attract, so if you´re thinking of avoiding someone that person ends up showing up, at least in your mind.

That´s more or less working for me, but then again we are all different.

Great thoughts!

 

[OldFaithful]

Does not fill me with confidence in my current situation.

I feel your pain. Like the OP's past experience, it's my current struggle. Actually that is what led me to this forum, and then to the book. I've been searching for like minded folks in my community with no success, hence my online search and some of my threads:
https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/community/threads/my-own-personal-section-of-the-library.67318/
https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/co...he-only-one-physical-product-invention.67161/

I'm working on being the person I need to be, and that means I'm learning to reach out to more people. It's slow going, but if we continue we'll get there.

 

[AndrewNC]

I feel your pain. Like the OP's past experience, it's my current struggle. Actually that is what led me to this forum, and then to the book. I've been searching for like minded folks in my community with no success, hence my online search and some of my threads:
https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/community/threads/my-own-personal-section-of-the-library.67318/
https://www.thefastlaneforum.com/co...he-only-one-physical-product-invention.67161/

I'm working on being the person I need to be, and that means I'm learning to reach out to more people. It's slow going, but if we continue we'll get there.

When the student is ready, the mentor appears, at just the right time.

Perhaps the person that is meant to be helping you the most is already in your life, and you didn't realize it yet?

 

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[Ubermensch]

A new twist on an old concept:

"the five people that surround you are the average of the actions you take and the mindset you have"

The people I spend the most time with are all chief executives or managing partners of middle market companies $5M - $500M in revenue.

Must be why I feel like such a BO$$.

The trainer was talking about "perception is projection" and how our life around us outside of our bodies is a result of what occurs on the inside. He framed it up in a 100% literal (quantum physics) sense.

It would be interesting to see how quantum physics supports your ideas.

It be particularly interesting if you can actually make a compelling case, because some people dismiss your ideas as "woo woo." If science supports your ideas, then that would ironically make them the exact opposite of said "woo woo."

The purpose of the lecture was to give us a higher level of personal accountability.

Then I realized that the "five people" in my life usually came about only when I took the actions necessary to be at the level they were at.

The phrase "monkey see, monkey do" comes to mind, along with Robert Greene's statements about "mirror neurons" and how we pick up things from people that are non-verbal.

When I went to my first B&P (fine...Fastlane Summit), I met three other fastlaners in the same shoes as me and we all were in the same stage of life as eachother...going through the same struggles.

But they only came into my network because of the actions I took. Then, when we all took action- a multi-millionaire mentor came into our life. But ONLY after we took action and we're ready.

So I'm coming to believe that the goal is NOT to simply seek out people to surround ourself with (example; "I'm new here - can MJ mentor me!?) but to transform into the person first and then know others will surround you.

Not to mention that WHO you are talking to makes a big difference. "Taking action" is great, especially for salesman.

@OVOvince could apply this to the actions he's taking to get in touch decision makers.

I think I heard it before as "when the student is ready, the mentor appears"

I now view this at a literal level. Master prac is some trippy stuff

I forget who said it - it was either Albert Einstein or Benjamin Franklin - "the harder I work, the luckier I get."

To use your analogy, a "mentor" - or a master - usually resides on top of the mountain, so you can't even find The Master until you climb yourself.

Ultimately, we teach ourselves. So, perhaps once you climb the mountain, you realize that the real teacher, mentor and master was yourself all along.

 

[Fox]

Whats people take on this when you work by yourself a lot during the initial stages of moving into the Fastlane?

Since I code 8-10hrs a day I try to supplement my closest '5' with podcasts, audio books and quick videos by the worlds best entrepreneurs. I have just moved country so my local circle is low. I have started reaching out a lot though and I can see it will grow a lot in the up coming months. You guys think the '5' also applies to what information you consume?

 

[AndrewNC]

It be particularly interesting if you can actually make a compelling case, because some people dismiss your ideas as "woo woo." If science supports your ideas, then that would ironically make them the exact opposite of said "woo woo."

Hmm - I could fund a mainstream university study on certain topics that people find woo woo, they'll prove it by science, and get the legitimacy out that way....might be worth the investment...

interesting thought...thanks.

 

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[Ubermensch]

Hmm - I could fund a mainstream university study on certain topics that people find woo woo, they'll prove it by science, and get the legitimacy out that way....might be worth the investment...

interesting thought...thanks.

There are plenty of broke scientists off and on university campuses that could use the money and could do the work.

Heck, you might meet one the next time you order coffee at Starbucks.

 

[axiom]

The people I spend the most time with are all chief executives or managing partners of middle market companies $5M - $500M in revenue.

Must be why I feel like such a BO$$.



It would be interesting to see how quantum physics supports your ideas.

It be particularly interesting if you can actually make a compelling case, because some people dismiss your ideas as "woo woo." If science supports your ideas, then that would ironically make them the exact opposite of said "woo woo."

The purpose of the lecture was to give us a higher level of personal accountability.



The phrase "monkey see, monkey do" comes to mind, along with Robert Greene's statements about "mirror neurons" and how we pick up things from people that are non-verbal.



Not to mention that WHO you are talking to makes a big difference. "Taking action" is great, especially for salesman.

@OVOvince could apply this to the actions he's taking to get in touch decision makers.



I forget who said it - it was either Albert Einstein or Benjamin Franklin - "the harder I work, the luckier I get."

To use your analogy, a "mentor" - or a master - usually resides on top of the mountain, so you can't even find The Master until you climb yourself.

Ultimately, we teach ourselves. So, perhaps once you climb the mountain, you realize that the real teacher, mentor and master was yourself all along.

Agreed, 100%. The mentor does not teach, he gives you the opportunity to teach yourself.

 

[Paul Thomas]

Raise your standards and cut off those that don't meet them. Harsh truth?

 

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[Mattie]

"the five people that surround you are the average of the actions you take and the mindset you have"

I have to lmao, because I was on Blab earlier and I asked a simple questions about the best route to Angel funders and investments. Their answer: read a lot of books and do everything I've done the last two years. And of course the lecture about the five people you hang around and needing the right mindset coach. I didn't say anymore. Except yes I agree, I've hung out on the Fastlane for the last two years. lol And then I left. Why I left, because they didn't bother to know who they were talking too, and I am a mindset coach. And the five people I hang out with most is Fastlane. lol

I think people should ask more questions about their audience, before they start with the speech. And frankly they never ended up answering the question at all. lol They just wanted to sell $470 package of information like INSIDERS here. I rolled my eyes. There's enough information inside, I rather go there where I know I'll get the right information.

 

[SteveO]

It be particularly interesting if you can actually make a compelling case, because some people dismiss your ideas as "woo woo." If science supports your ideas, then that would ironically make them the exact opposite of said "woo woo."

I certainly follow the "woo woo". It works for me.

I'll admit that I would never win an argument with anyone over the fact that I don't believe science is built on truth. It is just a bunch of building blocks that started from assumptions. It is our society's belief system though. So, society will win that argument in the face of other people. But, this is my belief.

I make real and major decisions based on information that comes from inside. I have visions that give me information and change my directions. I believe that we all have abilities that some would call "psychic" but I like to think of them as inner senses. We go on with our lives so singularly focused that we cannot see or hear what we are really telling ourselves.

Certainly most people will dismiss this which is fine by me. I don't really care that much.

What is funny is that Andrew and I have had conversations face-to-face on our beliefs. We both learned them from different places but there is a lot of overlap.

 

[MTF]

@OldFaithful and @MattR82, please do NOT think that you can't achieve success if you're not surrounded with super successful people. None of my friends are entrepreneurs. The closest I am to successful people is this forum.

Yet, after 7 long years of one epic failure after another I now life the exact lifestyle I described in my personal vision (and even greatly surpassed many goals and am on track to go even bigger). I'm writing this just to give your brain proof that it is possible even if you have a less than optimal social circle.

Do NOT let your brain consider a lack of successful friends a good excuse to stop believing you'll make it. It's NOT a prerequisite to success. It might be a prerequisite to something else (discussed later), but is not necessary (though definitely very helpful) while you're building your business.

I know very well that it's very easy to say "surround yourself with successful people," but some of us just don't have the access or the means to access them. However, while sometimes it's hard to physically surround yourself with successful people, you can surround yourself with successful influences. In the end, it's not really about having friends of a certain type, but getting external input of a certain type. You do it with:

• forums (like this one) - I probably wouldn't have achieved the success I'm enjoying today without this forum, especially thanks to my progress threads.
  
• books - just don't read too many of them without doing anything.
  
• blogs - they often give a more personal look of a life and thought processes of a successful person, and that's often more helpful than dry "how to."
  
• videos - just don't mistake the feel-good emotions after watching inspirational videos with the sense of achievement. Use them as fodder for how you want to structure your lifestyle.
  
• any other way that will help you acquire the mindset, beliefs and expectations of successful people.

Any given week, I spend way more time and energy on these positive things than with my friends - and that's easy to do because these resources are always at your disposal whenever you need them.

By controlling what enters your mind (and you can either feed it with crappy beliefs, expectations, thought processes etc. or the healthy, successful ones) you'll eventually transform your mindset to match the one of the successful people - even if nobody around you is particularly successful.

As for your friends, I would keep anyone that makes you feel good while spending time with him or her (just be cautious of the influence they have over you because they might inadvertently transmit their limiting beliefs on you - it's not their fault, though).

The only people I would definitely cut out from your life are negative people. All of my friends are happy and positive individuals, so even if they don't have the same goals or beliefs as I do, they're still a very valuable part of my life (and obviously I try to be a valuable part of their lives as well). However, people who bring you down aren't your friends and they will make it much harder to achieve success.

Last but not least, don't forget that life mirrors your expectations, and expectations are contagious. Your friends - even if they're otherwise cool people - might be happy with (or tolerate) a 9 to 5 job that keeps them in shackles, be content with having a boring routine, avoid all types of risk and pretty much "spend lead the lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them."

Once you become successful, you'll notice a disparity between you and them because they won't be able to do many of the things you told yourself you would do when you achieve success.

This means that if you'd like to get more out of your life, eventually you'll have to make friends who are entrepreneurs or are otherwise free to experience life.

For instance, I just signed up for a skydiving course. None of my friends would be able to afford it (either because they don't have money, guts or time to do so), so I'll just use it as an opportunity to make friends with like-minded people who do.

I didn't concern myself about making such friends when I was trying to build my business because at that time my primary focus was to make money, not make my life more exciting. I just made sure I received the right successful programming on a daily basis with the Internet, books, etc. and took action.

I'm sorry for a little thread derail, but I sympathize a lot with people who feel bad because they don't know any successful people. Don't worry guys - you'll make it even if you feel like a lone wolf while everyone around you is preaching to "surround yourself with successful people".

 

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[Torobaro]

@OldFaithful and @MattR82, please do NOT think that you can't achieve success if you're not surrounded with super successful people. None of my friends are entrepreneurs. The closest I am to successful people is this forum.

Yet, after 7 long years of one epic failure after another I now life the exact lifestyle I described in my personal vision (and even greatly surpassed many goals and am on track to go even bigger). I'm writing this just to give your brain proof that it is possible even if you have a less than optimal social circle.

Do NOT let your brain consider a lack of successful friends a good excuse to stop believing you'll make it. It's NOT a prerequisite to success. It might be a prerequisite to something else (discussed later), but is not necessary (though definitely very helpful) while you're building your business.

I know very well that it's very easy to say "surround yourself with successful people," but some of us just don't have the access or the means to access them. However, while sometimes it's hard to physically surround yourself with successful people, you can surround yourself with successful influences. In the end, it's not really about having friends of a certain type, but getting external input of a certain type. You do it with:

• forums (like this one) - I probably wouldn't have achieved the success I'm enjoying today without this forum, especially thanks to my progress threads.
  
• books - just don't read too many of them without doing anything.
  
• blogs - they often give a more personal look of a life and thought processes of a successful person, and that's often more helpful than dry "how to."
  
• videos - just don't mistake the feel-good emotions after watching inspirational videos with the sense of achievement. Use them as fodder for how you want to structure your lifestyle.
  
• any other way that will help you acquire the mindset, beliefs and expectations of successful people.

Any given week, I spend way more time and energy on these positive things than with my friends - and that's easy to do because these resources are always at your disposal whenever you need them.

By controlling what enters your mind (and you can either feed it with crappy beliefs, expectations, thought processes etc. or the healthy, successful ones) you'll eventually transform your mindset to match the one of the successful people - even if nobody around you is particularly successful.

As for your friends, I would keep anyone that makes you feel good while spending time with him or her (just be cautious of the influence they have over you because they might inadvertently transmit their limiting beliefs on you - it's not their fault, though).

The only people I would definitely cut out from your life are negative people. All of my friends are happy and positive individuals, so even if they don't have the same goals or beliefs as I do, they're still a very valuable part of my life (and obviously I try to be a valuable part of their lives as well). However, people who bring you down aren't your friends and they will make it much harder to achieve success.

Last but not least, don't forget that life mirrors your expectations, and expectations are contagious. Your friends - even if they're otherwise cool people - might be happy with (or tolerate) a 9 to 5 job that keeps them in shackles, be content with having a boring routine, avoid all types of risk and pretty much "spend lead the lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them."

Once you become successful, you'll notice a disparity between you and them because they won't be able to do many of the things you told yourself you would do when you achieve success.

This means that if you'd like to get more out of your life, eventually you'll have to make friends who are entrepreneurs or are otherwise free to experience life.

For instance, I just signed up for a skydiving course. None of my friends would be able to afford it (either because they don't have money, guts or time to do so), so I'll just use it as an opportunity to make friends with like-minded people who do.

I didn't concern myself about making such friends when I was trying to build my business because at that time my primary focus was to make money, not make my life more exciting. I just made sure I received the right successful programming on a daily basis with the Internet, books, etc. and took action.

I'm sorry for a little thread derail, but I sympathize a lot with people who feel bad because they don't know any successful people. Don't worry guys - you'll make it even if you feel like a lone wolf while everyone around you is preaching to "surround yourself with successful people".

Wow!!! Great stuff, I agree 100% on it. I might even add that constantly complaining there are no sucessful people around you might just be an excuse you keep telling to yourself as to why you aren´t making it. I am going to read this part everyday:

"I didn't concern myself about making such friends when I was trying to build my business because at that time my primary focus was to make money, not make my life more exciting. I just made sure I received the right successful programming on a daily basis with the Internet, books, etc. and took action."

Could you talk about the lifestyle you are currently living? I am still building mine

 

[OldFaithful]

@OldFaithful and @MattR82, please do NOT think that you can't achieve success if you're not surrounded with super successful people. None of my friends are entrepreneurs. The closest I am to successful people is this forum.

Excellent! Thank you! I am glad to hear that it can be done, and others have done it before me. If you can ignore the Slowlaners & Sidewalkers to find support/growth from books & forums, etc...then I can do it too.

 

[MattR82]

Well said.

It's not that I don't know successful or positive people. But at the moment I am stuck working away where you are with these people constantly for weeks on end. Places like this forum are a god send.

Actually, this is one of the reasons I am leaving, and also why I am interested in working in co-work spaces overseas when I finally get there, even though my business is nowhere near as advanced as most of the people working there.

 

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[MTF]

Could you talk about the lifestyle you are currently living? I am still building mine

What would you like to know?

Generally speaking nowadays my lifestyle is focused around learning new skills (currently primarily foreign languages), sports (currently tennis and rock climbing), and taking care of my health and fitness (recently changed my diet and workout plan with a goal to go below 10% body fat). I'm also still working on my business to take it to the next level.

After watching this video I realized I wanted more excitement in my life, so skydiving is the first step toward badassifying myself and experiencing what the world has to offer if you dare to step outside of the ordinary stuff.

 

[Lex DeVille]

so skydiving is the first step

Careful, it's addicting.

 

[AndrewNC]

After watching this video I realized I wanted more excitement in my life, so skydiving is the first step toward badassifying myself and experiencing what the world has to offer if you dare to step outside of the ordinary stuff.

I love how YouTube serves as motivatoin for both of us. You'll enjoy this jump!

 

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[MTF]

When and where are we skydiving together @SinisterLex and @AndrewNC then?

 

[Supa]

@OldFaithful and @MattR82, please do NOT think that you can't achieve success if you're not surrounded with super successful people. None of my friends are entrepreneurs. The closest I am to successful people is this forum.

Yet, after 7 long years of one epic failure after another I now life the exact lifestyle I described in my personal vision (and even greatly surpassed many goals and am on track to go even bigger). I'm writing this just to give your brain proof that it is possible even if you have a less than optimal social circle.

Do NOT let your brain consider a lack of successful friends a good excuse to stop believing you'll make it. It's NOT a prerequisite to success. It might be a prerequisite to something else (discussed later), but is not necessary (though definitely very helpful) while you're building your business.

I know very well that it's very easy to say "surround yourself with successful people," but some of us just don't have the access or the means to access them. However, while sometimes it's hard to physically surround yourself with successful people, you can surround yourself with successful influences. In the end, it's not really about having friends of a certain type, but getting external input of a certain type. You do it with:

• forums (like this one) - I probably wouldn't have achieved the success I'm enjoying today without this forum, especially thanks to my progress threads.
  
• books - just don't read too many of them without doing anything.
  
• blogs - they often give a more personal look of a life and thought processes of a successful person, and that's often more helpful than dry "how to."
  
• videos - just don't mistake the feel-good emotions after watching inspirational videos with the sense of achievement. Use them as fodder for how you want to structure your lifestyle.
  
• any other way that will help you acquire the mindset, beliefs and expectations of successful people.

Any given week, I spend way more time and energy on these positive things than with my friends - and that's easy to do because these resources are always at your disposal whenever you need them.

By controlling what enters your mind (and you can either feed it with crappy beliefs, expectations, thought processes etc. or the healthy, successful ones) you'll eventually transform your mindset to match the one of the successful people - even if nobody around you is particularly successful.

As for your friends, I would keep anyone that makes you feel good while spending time with him or her (just be cautious of the influence they have over you because they might inadvertently transmit their limiting beliefs on you - it's not their fault, though).

The only people I would definitely cut out from your life are negative people. All of my friends are happy and positive individuals, so even if they don't have the same goals or beliefs as I do, they're still a very valuable part of my life (and obviously I try to be a valuable part of their lives as well). However, people who bring you down aren't your friends and they will make it much harder to achieve success.

Last but not least, don't forget that life mirrors your expectations, and expectations are contagious. Your friends - even if they're otherwise cool people - might be happy with (or tolerate) a 9 to 5 job that keeps them in shackles, be content with having a boring routine, avoid all types of risk and pretty much "spend lead the lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them."

Once you become successful, you'll notice a disparity between you and them because they won't be able to do many of the things you told yourself you would do when you achieve success.

This means that if you'd like to get more out of your life, eventually you'll have to make friends who are entrepreneurs or are otherwise free to experience life.

For instance, I just signed up for a skydiving course. None of my friends would be able to afford it (either because they don't have money, guts or time to do so), so I'll just use it as an opportunity to make friends with like-minded people who do.

I didn't concern myself about making such friends when I was trying to build my business because at that time my primary focus was to make money, not make my life more exciting. I just made sure I received the right successful programming on a daily basis with the Internet, books, etc. and took action.

I'm sorry for a little thread derail, but I sympathize a lot with people who feel bad because they don't know any successful people. Don't worry guys - you'll make it even if you feel like a lone wolf while everyone around you is preaching to "surround yourself with successful people".

And another [HASHTAG]#GoldPost[/HASHTAG] ( we need that tag )