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Final Penance

New Contributor
May 21, 2022
4
11
Hi there everyone,

First off I'm glad to be part of this community now. I've been a follower of MJ's stuff for a few years so I really should have joined earlier.

My name is Ross and have been learning about entrepreneurship and personal development since I was 25 and I'm now 29 closing to 30. Since all that time I have not done a single entrepreneurial endeavor except from a YouTube channel where I do video game covers. I have a decade of music production experience and I have not even made a penny from that. I see other people with a fraction of the experience I have and making an income. I can't help but feel there is something wrong with me.

I don't want to sound like the usual person that says "I don't know how to start", as I feel like my issue is more to do with my mind. Things like inferiority complexs and maybe complete inexperience in making money by my own means, I feel like might be at the root of my issue. It's definitely more than a "where do I start thing".

After all this time after getting invaluable information of MJ and others like Jim Rohn, I am still in a job I don't want to be in and am really getting down about my inability to make things happen. Maybe I need real in person mentorship or something but I am seriously struggling with this and don't know what to do.

Has anyone else struggled with this kind of thing and managed to overcome it? I feel if I just had some experience or something I could finally start doing something. I don't want to come off as a whinge but I'm really disappointed with myself with this.

Thank you and I appreciate your time.
 
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Ernman

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Welcome to the forum. Which of MJ's books have you read?

You're suffering from a combination of two major things. Fear AND it doesn't hurt bad enough (you have NOT had your FTE).

Fear: This is commonly at the root of why people don't try. Fear of swimming, flying, riding a bike, hiking in the woods, rejection, failure, you name it. We are all full of fears. Usually what causes us to face those fears and move through them is some strong stimulus.

FTE: For most of us a real FTE is the stimulus that over comes our fears and pushes us to take the first steps to the Fastlane. Even many who are otherwise adventurous in life (bungee jumping, skate boarding, surfing, etc) frequently need an FTE to push them out of the comfort of the sidewalk or slow lane.

What can you do? Don't just lurk on this forum or life. Get engaged. Read, comment and ask question in the threads - especially the GOLD and NOTABLE threads. Get out and experience life. Listen to what people say with an ear towards things that need to be improved. Ask yourself if there's opportunity in what you hear and see. Take some small steps as side gigs/hustles and see how making money for yourself feels.

A word about mentors: Most of today's life coaches and mentors have no clue about the Fastlane. So please be careful who you chose to believe and follow.
 

Guyfieri5

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Welcome to the forum!
 

Final Penance

New Contributor
May 21, 2022
4
11
Welcome to the forum. Which of MJ's books have you read?

You're suffering from a combination of two major things. Fear AND it doesn't hurt bad enough (you have NOT had your FTE).

Fear: This is commonly at the root of why people don't try. Fear of swimming, flying, riding a bike, hiking in the woods, rejection, failure, you name it. We are all full of fears. Usually what causes us to face those fears and move through them is some strong stimulus.

FTE: For most of us a real FTE is the stimulus that over comes our fears and pushes us to take the first steps to the Fastlane. Even many who are otherwise adventurous in life (bungee jumping, skate boarding, surfing, etc) frequently need an FTE to push them out of the comfort of the sidewalk or slow lane.

What can you do? Don't just lurk on this forum or life. Get engaged. Read, comment and ask question in the threads - especially the GOLD and NOTABLE threads. Get out and experience life. Listen to what people say with an ear towards things that need to be improved. Ask yourself if there's opportunity in what you hear and see. Take some small steps as side gigs/hustles and see how making money for yourself feels.

A word about mentors: Most of today's life coaches and mentors have no clue about the Fastlane. So please be careful who you chose to believe and follow.
 
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Final Penance

New Contributor
May 21, 2022
4
11
Welcome to the forum. Which of MJ's books have you read?

You're suffering from a combination of two major things. Fear AND it doesn't hurt bad enough (you have NOT had your FTE).

Fear: This is commonly at the root of why people don't try. Fear of swimming, flying, riding a bike, hiking in the woods, rejection, failure, you name it. We are all full of fears. Usually what causes us to face those fears and move through them is some strong stimulus.

FTE: For most of us a real FTE is the stimulus that over comes our fears and pushes us to take the first steps to the Fastlane. Even many who are otherwise adventurous in life (bungee jumping, skate boarding, surfing, etc) frequently need an FTE to push them out of the comfort of the sidewalk or slow lane.

What can you do? Don't just lurk on this forum or life. Get engaged. Read, comment and ask question in the threads - especially the GOLD and NOTABLE threads. Get out and experience life. Listen to what people say with an ear towards things that need to be improved. Ask yourself if there's opportunity in what you hear and see. Take some small steps as side gigs/hustles and see how making money for yourself feels.

A word about mentors: Most of today's life coaches and mentors have no clue about the Fastlane. So please be careful who you chose to believe and follow.
Hey man thank you for the detailed reply. You are probably right about the fear side being a big cause of my inertia. I definitely have had an FTE event when I was 25 which is the reason I got into all this stuff.

I have literally been unemployed since because I quick my job to try to do something. I ended up creating a electronic pop rock album with my cousin after which didn't go anywhere. After that I got into making video game cover on YouTube that is also not seeing anything. It wasn't the best use of my entrepreneurial endeavors I admit. Now that I'm back in a job I am realizing I've screwed up again because I'm literally back where I started. I think starting from scratch with a new skill in whatever field that isn't music production is another thing that adds to the lost mindset. The books I've read of MJs are The Millionaire Fastlane and Unscripted . I think I will buy the next book soon too.

I will definitely get onto the other forums and ask questions. Is there any practical steps I could make to make some small changes that will start the positive momentum in the meantime?
 

Ernman

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First, I'd say stop beating yourself up. The journey to the Fastlane is not easy or fast. The path can be circuitous.

Write down all your lessons learned from the music biz experience, good and bad. You don't want to forget.

Be the best employee you can be. Right now that job is feeding you, putting a roof over your head, etc. Take pride in what you do, even if you think it is lowly. Try other jobs for the exposure to real world challenges they will give you.

There's nothing wrong with having a job as you take this journey. Frequently that's where we find the "thing" that allows us to make progress. We also learn many things while working jobs. Just don't ever get comfortable in a job. Remember it is a means to an end and nothing more.
 

Angler

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Fear AND it doesn't hurt bad enough (you have NOT had your FTE).

First, I'd say stop beating yourself up. The journey to the Fastlane is not easy or fast. The path can be circuitous.
All crucial points. I'd even add that it's imperative that you DON'T beat yourself up. You got everyone around you to not believe in you at any given moment, so why go the mile and not have faith in yourself? People will bring you down if you give them a chance. Don't give them a chance. Believe in your self, your process, and your vision 100%. Figure out what you want, I mean really WANT. Like it's either do or die. Gun to the head.

That being said, it took you 4 years to figure out the things that are not working for you. You're about to be 30. That's great. From the stand point of a person in their 50 or 60 still figuring their stuff out, they'd kill to have your position. You got 4 years of learning and lessons.

From now on, no excuses. Keep going
 
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Andy Black

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A few lines that might help:

“F*ck why. It only holds you back.” (Craig Desorcy)

“What if you already know enough? What would you do then?” (Craig Desorcy)

“Overthinking is the art of solving problems you don’t have.”

“You can't invoice for input.” (Blaise Brosnan)

"The market doesn't pay for activity." (Blaise Brosnan)

“Money is proof you helped your fellow man.” (MJ DeMarco)

“Start.” (@Vigilante)


Business is simple: Help people. Get paid. Help more people.

Who will you help this week?


The first row or two of links in my signature might help you.
 

Mind:Life

New Contributor
May 19, 2022
8
12
United States
Here's my suggestion for overcoming fear or whatever is holding you back. Break down what you are trying to do into small pieces and if you are still afraid/not taking action, break it down into even smaller pieces until you get to something you can / will do. Then take the first step, even if the action sees to be too small to make a difference (which it might be - the point is to take action.)

Then take the next tiny step, whatever it might be. Rinse and repeat and you will soon be able to take bigger steps and see measurable progress.
 

ProcessPro

Bronze Contributor
Speedway Pass
Apr 26, 2018
364
416
Hi there everyone,

First off I'm glad to be part of this community now. I've been a follower of MJ's stuff for a few years so I really should have joined earlier.

My name is Ross and have been learning about entrepreneurship and personal development since I was 25 and I'm now 29 closing to 30. Since all that time I have not done a single entrepreneurial endeavor except from a YouTube channel where I do video game covers. I have a decade of music production experience and I have not even made a penny from that. I see other people with a fraction of the experience I have and making an income. I can't help but feel there is something wrong with me.

I don't want to sound like the usual person that says "I don't know how to start", as I feel like my issue is more to do with my mind. Things like inferiority complexs and maybe complete inexperience in making money by my own means, I feel like might be at the root of my issue. It's definitely more than a "where do I start thing".

After all this time after getting invaluable information of MJ and others like Jim Rohn, I am still in a job I don't want to be in and am really getting down about my inability to make things happen. Maybe I need real in person mentorship or something but I am seriously struggling with this and don't know what to do.

Has anyone else struggled with this kind of thing and managed to overcome it? I feel if I just had some experience or something I could finally start doing something. I don't want to come off as a whinge but I'm really disappointed with myself with this.

Thank you and I appreciate your time.
Want to know why you haven't gotten started? You have to look at what you've been doing instead. There is no such thing as a behavior vacuum. So let's say I commit to exercise everday at 3pm, and 3pm comes and I didn't. I have to look at what I did instead - whether it be that I watched YouTube clips, or I took a nap instead - those behaviors were more rewarding than my business-related, target behavior which would have resulted in progress.

Look up Self Directed Behavior by David Watson, or Tiny habits for a less academic read that's just as good. But even that might lead to procrastination and too much delay. Right now, grab a piece of paper and make a note of the next ONE thing you can do to progress toward your business goals. Maybe it might be to just find a business idea. When you do that, post it here. If I'm around, I can suggest step 2, if I'm not, someone else might chime in.
 
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Simon Angel

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Start your day with an ice-cold shower. Not lukewarm, not room temperature, not just cool, but as cold as your water can get.

Then, survive the first 10 seconds. After you do so, either get out OR stay for another minute or two.

If you can do the above the next time you get in the shower, you can start.

Why?

Because the anxiety/discomfort you feel whenever you do something new like starting a business or cold calling potential clients (or, in this case, something extremely uncomfortable physically) is tied to a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine A.K.A adrenaline.

However, whenever you get a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine from things like watching the news about humanity's impending doom or getting confronted by an aggressive guy on the street who swears you looked at his girlfriend's fake boobs, you're experiencing that surge against your will i.e NOT deliberately.

On the other hand, when you turn the shower knob to the coldest setting you're DELIBERATELY causing the surge of these stress hormones while simultaneously telling your body to just deal with it... Which it will.

And how will this help me, exactly?

Cold showers will help you by giving you better control over your stress response by improving your grit and mental fortitude.

This means that, over time, you will learn to stay unphased mentally whenever your body signals that you're experiencing stress. Here's an example:

That crippling anxiety you have whenever you cold call prospects? It will become a minor nuisance that you'll still feel but to a MUCH lesser extent AND without it having a major influence over your actions, speech, or outcome (i.e not closing a client because you kept stuttering or sounding unconfident).

Also, starting an entrepreneurial venture of any kind will seem like a very casual thing to do. It's kind of like dating - at first, you're way too concerned about shit that doesn't matter (does my hair look good?) and not focusing on the shit that actually DOES matter (is this chick/dude a good match for me in the long-term?).

A similar analogy with business would be worrying about whether your idea is good enough to start (or whether your website looks cool enough) rather than focusing on the value you're providing and just going for it by testing the market and judging off of the feedback you get.

Oh, and before you run off to take that cold shower (if you're that enthusiastic about it after reading this, you're already winning) please DO NOT do this if you have a heart condition! While the risks of anything bad happening are slim if you have a diagnosed cardiac issue you should speak to your doctor before testing your physical limits.

Good luck!
 
Last edited:

Ernman

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This means that, over time, you will learn to stay unphased mentally whenever your body signals that you're experiencing stress.
I think some of us are wired to actually enjoy doing this to ourselves.
 
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Ayobami23

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Sep 16, 2021
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Start your day with an ice-cold shower. Not lukewarm, not room temperature, not just cool, but as cold as your water can get.

Then, survive the first 10 seconds. After you do so, either get out OR stay for another minute or two.

If you can do the above the next time you get in the shower, you can start.

Why?

Because the anxiety/discomfort you feel whenever you do something new like starting a business or cold calling potential clients (or, in this case, something extremely uncomfortable physically) is tied to a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine A.K.A adrenaline.

However, whenever you get a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine from things like watching the news about humanity's impending doom or getting confronted by an aggressive guy on the street who swears you looked at his girlfriend's fake boobs, you're experiencing that surge against your will i.e NOT deliberately.

On the other hand, when you turn the shower knob to the coldest setting you're DELIBERATELY causing the surge of these stress hormones while simultaneously telling your body to just deal with it... Which it will.

And how will this help me, exactly?

Cold showers will help you by giving you better control over your stress response by improving your grit and mental fortitude.

This means that, over time, you will learn to stay unphased mentally whenever your body signals that you're experiencing stress. Here's an example:

That crippling anxiety you have whenever you cold call prospects? It will become a minor nuisance that you'll still feel but to a MUCH lesser extent AND without it having a major influence over your actions, speech, or outcome (i.e not closing a client because you kept stuttering or sounding unconfident).

Also, starting an entrepreneurial venture of any kind will seem like a very casual thing to do. It's kind of like dating - at first, you're way too concerned about shit that doesn't matter (does my hair look good?) and not focusing on the shit that actually DOES matter (is this chick/dude a good match for me in the long-term?).
Wim Hof method
A similar analogy with business would be worrying about whether your idea is good enough to start (or whether your website looks cool enough) rather than focusing on the value you're providing and just going for it by testing the market and judging off of the feedback you get.

Oh, and before you run off to take that cold shower (if you're that enthusiastic about it after reading this, you're already winning) please DO NOT do this if you have a heart condition! While the risks of anything bad happening are slim if you have a diagnosed cardiac issue you should speak to your doctor before testing your physical limits.

Good luck!
Wim Hof method
 

David Fitz

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Whenever I think of something that I know I should do but I haven't done it yet I always think of the Jeff Bezos quote which he calls regret minimization framework.

Basically fast forward to when you're 80 years old. Do you want to look back and regret not doing what you know you should be doing when you're young now?

View: https://youtu.be/jwG_qR6XmDQ
 

BizyDad

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Ismail941

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1) Read Demarco's Books - Read couple of times
2) Master the Boring Fundamentals

You will be okay!
 

Myster kouadj

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Whenever I think of something that I know I should do but I haven't done it yet I always think of the Jeff Bezos quote which he calls regret minimization framework.

Basically fast forward to when you're 80 years old. Do you want to look back and regret not doing what you know you should be doing when you're young now?

View: https://youtu.be/jwG_qR6XmDQ
He also has another quote that '' what is dangerous is not to try to evolve '' so every time I don't do something that makes me grow, I think of it..
 
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Andy Black

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He also has another quote that '' what is dangerous is not to try to evolve '' so every time I don't do something that makes me grow, I think of it..
Nice quote. My issue is that it’s “me” focused.

I find most people are stuck because they’re in their own way.

They’re in their own way because they’re focused on themselves.

Focus on helping people and you magically stop thinking about yourself and magically stop getting in your own way.


Another way to think of it:

Can you invoice anyone because of your personal growth or because you’ve evolved?

I think not. The market doesn’t gaf about us. Only how we can serve them.
 

Vinz

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Lately I'm recommending this everywhere here on the forum, but because it is helping me massively...
Before the fastlane, before becoming a millionaire, there is a thing you can work on to really get the momentum going, and to me it seems it is the thing you need to work on...

Since you mentioned inferiority complexes, you need to work on your mental first. Your mental health, your own self image, what you think about yourself, your confidence and fear and courage...

The Self Authoring program by Jordan Peterson is helping me massively with this, especially with dealing with past traumas. I'm completely changed on the inside and it is only starting to show up.

BUT if you don't want to buy the program, or can't afford to (it's 29$) you can just writing about all your problems, what you think you got wrong, your past experiences, what you want to do...
You know, all the things that keep going around in your head and disturb every decision you make.
Just writing itself has immense benefits and is the focus of the program. Again can't tell how much I'm benefitting, but maybe I just needed it a lot. And it seems you need it too.
 

Final Penance

New Contributor
May 21, 2022
4
11
I didn't expect so many replies so thank you everyone for the great advice!

I feel I had some good mindsets over the
years but complacency and life has shunted me back to a scripted life. I was reminded that this life is out there for people who actually think hard and not just work hard. It's funny how this happens to you, all the great epiphanies and knowledge you learned can go out the window if you don't consciously keep on top of this.

Again I really appreciate all the advice and I'm going to get myself back on track and out of this hole. I know I can always ask everyone here for help so there really is nothing to fear except a life of wasted time.

I honestly believe now that in the face of a negative reality, optimism and positivity (not in the cringey delusional manner) is the only hope. Letting your mind believe it's screwed if your reality says so, is a colossal mistake. There is always a way to change it. Thanks again everyone!

Sincerely,
Ross
 
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Myster kouadj

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Nice quote. My issue is that it’s “me” focused.

I find most people are stuck because they’re in their own way.

They’re in their own way because they’re focused on themselves.

Focus on helping people and you magically stop thinking about yourself and magically stop getting in your own way.


Another way to think of it:

Can you invoice anyone because of your personal growth or because you’ve evolved?

I think not. The market doesn’t gaf about us. Only how we can serve them.ok well noted. From now on I will be looking into this a lot.
ok well noted. From now on I will be looking into this a lot.
 

Andy Black

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ok well noted. From now on I will be looking into this a lot.
I think I've already mentioned the first two rows in my signature.

Make note of my favourite business quote too.

2022-05-24_23-38-10.png
 

Alessandros

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Has anyone else struggled with this kind of thing and managed to overcome it?
You are not alone with your struggle.

Don't compare yourself with others (comparative immunity, one of the 4Ds in Unscripted ). And read all the books more than only once. There is a strategy in it how to find & build a FL-business.
 
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SEGA SAPH

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Welcome to the forum. Which of MJ's books have you read?

You're suffering from a combination of two major things. Fear AND it doesn't hurt bad enough (you have NOT had your FTE).

Fear: This is commonly at the root of why people don't try. Fear of swimming, flying, riding a bike, hiking in the woods, rejection, failure, you name it. We are all full of fears. Usually what causes us to face those fears and move through them is some strong stimulus.

FTE: For most of us a real FTE is the stimulus that over comes our fears and pushes us to take the first steps to the Fastlane. Even many who are otherwise adventurous in life (bungee jumping, skate boarding, surfing, etc) frequently need an FTE to push them out of the comfort of the sidewalk or slow lane.

What can you do? Don't just lurk on this forum or life. Get engaged. Read, comment and ask question in the threads - especially the GOLD and NOTABLE threads. Get out and experience life. Listen to what people say with an ear towards things that need to be improved. Ask yourself if there's opportunity in what you hear and see. Take some small steps as side gigs/hustles and see how making money for yourself feels.

A word about mentors: Most of today's life coaches and mentors have no clue about the Fastlane. So please be careful who you chose to believe and follow.
Perfect. A masterpiece of advice. Wish you a great health and please do not stop to share with us thoughts like this! Have a great day!
 

Issi007

Contributor
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Apr 27, 2022
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Start your day with an ice-cold shower. Not lukewarm, not room temperature, not just cool, but as cold as your water can get.

Then, survive the first 10 seconds. After you do so, either get out OR stay for another minute or two.

If you can do the above the next time you get in the shower, you can start.

Why?

Because the anxiety/discomfort you feel whenever you do something new like starting a business or cold calling potential clients (or, in this case, something extremely uncomfortable physically) is tied to a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine A.K.A adrenaline.

However, whenever you get a surge of epinephrine and norepinephrine from things like watching the news about humanity's impending doom or getting confronted by an aggressive guy on the street who swears you looked at his girlfriend's fake boobs, you're experiencing that surge against your will i.e NOT deliberately.

On the other hand, when you turn the shower knob to the coldest setting you're DELIBERATELY causing the surge of these stress hormones while simultaneously telling your body to just deal with it... Which it will.

And how will this help me, exactly?

Cold showers will help you by giving you better control over your stress response by improving your grit and mental fortitude.

This means that, over time, you will learn to stay unphased mentally whenever your body signals that you're experiencing stress. Here's an example:

That crippling anxiety you have whenever you cold call prospects? It will become a minor nuisance that you'll still feel but to a MUCH lesser extent AND without it having a major influence over your actions, speech, or outcome (i.e not closing a client because you kept stuttering or sounding unconfident).

Also, starting an entrepreneurial venture of any kind will seem like a very casual thing to do. It's kind of like dating - at first, you're way too concerned about shit that doesn't matter (does my hair look good?) and not focusing on the shit that actually DOES matter (is this chick/dude a good match for me in the long-term?).

A similar analogy with business would be worrying about whether your idea is good enough to start (or whether your website looks cool enough) rather than focusing on the value you're providing and just going for it by testing the market and judging off of the feedback you get.

Oh, and before you run off to take that cold shower (if you're that enthusiastic about it after reading this, you're already winning) please DO NOT do this if you have a heart condition! While the risks of anything bad happening are slim if you have a diagnosed cardiac issue you should speak to your doctor before testing your physical limits.

Good luck!
Great post mate, good to know the chemical reaction behind cold showers,

Thanks for sharing!
 

Saad Khan

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Hi there everyone,

First off I'm glad to be part of this community now. I've been a follower of MJ's stuff for a few years so I really should have joined earlier.

My name is Ross and have been learning about entrepreneurship and personal development since I was 25 and I'm now 29 closing to 30. Since all that time I have not done a single entrepreneurial endeavor except from a YouTube channel where I do video game covers. I have a decade of music production experience and I have not even made a penny from that. I see other people with a fraction of the experience I have and making an income. I can't help but feel there is something wrong with me.

I don't want to sound like the usual person that says "I don't know how to start", as I feel like my issue is more to do with my mind. Things like inferiority complexs and maybe complete inexperience in making money by my own means, I feel like might be at the root of my issue. It's definitely more than a "where do I start thing".

After all this time after getting invaluable information of MJ and others like Jim Rohn, I am still in a job I don't want to be in and am really getting down about my inability to make things happen. Maybe I need real in person mentorship or something but I am seriously struggling with this and don't know what to do.

Has anyone else struggled with this kind of thing and managed to overcome it? I feel if I just had some experience or something I could finally start doing something. I don't want to come off as a whinge but I'm really disappointed with myself with this.

Thank you and I appreciate your time.
Partner up with someone who is getting the work in music production. Get started there and you problems will be fixed eventually.

Fix your mindset and listen to other fastlaners too
 
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