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MJ DeMarco! You Destroyed My Life! Please HELP! Am I Losing my MIND?!!

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
I really really need help & advice. I do not have anyone to talk too about this.

The people in my life will think I am going crazy and because I'm doubting my own sanity right now, they will probably convince/steer me to stay on my current path.

I have seen how you people on this forum, time & time again, offer idiots like me quality & impartial advice with level of patience & understanding that is beyond me.
It is really a beautiful environment here & I hope that you can offer me the affirmation/criticism I need to start sleeping peacefully again.

MJ, you have destroyed my life. This is an astonishing gift that you given & I will always be thankful to you for shattering this old reality.
Needless to say this re-birth will have drastic consequences and I am really not sure what the F*ck I am about to do.


Quick Intro
I'm male, 35 yo, Mechanical Engineer & single (thankfully)
Time & energy are the two biggest obstacles now holding me back.
I have a business idea & I am dying to get started.
For the past two months I have been:
  • Working 9-10 hours a day in my stressful Engineering Job (design management role),
  • 2-3 hours dedicated to fitness & health,
  • 1-2 hours healthy cooking + cleaning
  • 2-3 hours left for business development
  • Chill out hours = 0
During these 3 available hours I've been identifying & developing the tools necessary to execute a business. Of course I use as many hours in the weekend as I can.
These include learning to; program apps; releasing product in a foreign country; market research; marketing; etc. etc.
(don't worry, these aforementioned skill are not intended for critique here)

I am starting to burn out already. You guys who do this, have done this, or tried doing this with a family on top of it all? I salute you!

Plain and simple, this is not working for me. I cannot sleep because all the stress & this is further driving me mad.

I see two solutions:
1) Accept my scripted life, enjoy working a 40 hour week, live for the pension, marry the next one, have children & die and perish wealthy? F*ck THAT!!!
2) Take radical action to set off on a completely unscripted path? OH F*ck!!!!

Solution 1: MJ de Marco destroyed that life (thanks buddy!). I would rather die alone & poor than live a mediocre life without giving my best to the world.


Solution 2: The Reason I Need a FASTLANER Shrink (Therapist)!

So, I have a plan & yes it is F*cking Crazy, even for me.
I am just soooo F*cking 'Done' with this life now.
F*ck my amazing job & ridiculous working hours,
F*ck my two houses & mortgages,
F*ck my pathetic little life in little shitty whoTheFuckCaresVille.
F*ck F*ck F*ck it all!
I'm done, I'm Out, I Fold!!


From Hereon This is Where I Really Need Your Advice/Experience -

My Crazy Plan (before end of year 2019 until 2025 retirement):
  1. Cash in my UK pension (ca €20k) - it is sitting there in a pot doing nothing & helping no body.
  2. Sell my Brewery :(
  3. Buy/Build/Modify a VW Camper Van (or equivalent).
  4. Find a flexible job:
    1. to work when & where ever I want in Europe
    2. to generate cash - from my camper office
    3. generate the minimum required income to live comfortably in a camper van (plenty of YouTube expenses videos out there)
    4. preferably inline with what I will do in my day (e.g. fitness) or what need for the future (during execution).
    5. to allow maximum free time to focus on my core work (minimum 8 hours per day)
  5. Get my house rented out to cover the taxes & mortgage (let it pay for itself).
  6. The Apartment is already rented (paying for itself).
  7. Live at friend/camper and begin tying up all loose ends in home country
  8. Quit my Job/Ask for extended; open ended sabbatical
  9. Drive to Portugal or Spain or Italy or Greece or where I can work
  10. Work my butt off wherever I am
  11. Consider telling parents, people what I have done/am doing or not.

A Camper Van is Not Very FAST, but Can we Drive it in the FASTLANE?

A camper has MANY advantages with respect to Freedom & Exploring & Travelling. As a mechanical engineer this camper will be built to my own specification to ensure I can work & live even when off grid.
N.B. These wonderful things are not why we are here today, but it should play into the overall craziness equation.

The main foreseen advantages of a camper from a business point of view is that:
  • I can stay in any big city for any length of time in city-camping without spending much more money than a normal day parked beside a beach.
  • Compared to a cheap apartment in a big city, this is still a massive reduction in expenses during the start up phase.
  • If I want to travel to another city within Europe, I can drive always drive there in less than 24 hours.
  • No hotels, no flights etc.
  • If I want to recruit customers I will always have my office base & house with me in that particular city
  • Can always rent a desk in a city office, preferably with an entrepreneurial theme/atmosphere

Flexible Work:
This is going to be a challenge I think to maximize income whilst minimize hours in a sidewalk job.
I am not sure what type of viable 100% online jobs are available at this moment but a few ideas are:
  • Transcription
  • Translation (Dutch to English)
  • Online tutor
  • Teacher
Ideal Job:
Personal Trainer for the Bellyproof program (see link below REF1).
This will involve training people on a 5 week course from belly to six pack. For this I will most likely need a license & training from the London based founder Jacob.
Hopefully he has a list of contacts in Europe Mainland or receives requests from people who are interested in such a service.
This would involve 2-3 hours work 5 days a week, delivering a niche product with guaranteed results.
Also it meets my need of combining fitness with work which saves me additional hours to work on getting the business out there.
I have not brought this up with him yet because I know he is a busy guy and do not want to knock him off his course until the plan crystallizes a bit better.


Foreseen Challenges:
  • Loneliness could be an issue (thank god for tinder haha) - getting to know myself and facing my own inner demons (we all have them folks)
  • Tax issues (bit of experience working in multiple countries - good learning experience)
  • Getting used to frugality
  • Money (rainy day pot) for:
    • Tenants moving out [deposit+finding someone new],
    • Camper van and/or general unplanned maintenance,
    • Product roll out costs - Design, Advertising, Law Fees, Tax Fees, Registration Fees etc.
    • Tax

Worries, fears:

Absolutely NONE!


AND that is why I am here lovely people! It sounds so crazy & yet it feels so right!

My heart says go for it and my logical brain is scrambling to hang on to its pre-conditioned reality.

Why am I so okay with this idea?? Have I gone completely bonkers? Has MJ broken me?

Please Help Me Folks!

What am I missing here?
What am I risking here?
How does this picture compare to your experience?
Is it possible?
Am I being completely naive or foolish?
Is there a better more efficient way to go fast lane?

Thanks you all so much for your time. I really look forward to reading your advice here.

Regards,

B


REF1:
BellyProof / MovementFirst – Let's Get you Fit
 

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Primeperiwinkle

though she be but little...
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
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Speedway Pass
Nov 30, 2018
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403
DFW
“Hopefully he has a list of contacts in Europe Mainland or receives requests from people who are interested in such a service.”

Does your business idea hinge on this?
 
OP
OP
Brewmacker

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
“Hopefully he has a list of contacts in Europe Mainland or receives requests from people who are interested in such a service.”

Does your business idea hinge on this?
Not at all. As business goes we are on different planets.

It could be beneficial to meet some people who can afford the time& investment to follow a private 5 week program. Hopefully I can learn a few things from them whilst helping them back into a size 32 :)
 

Process

Bronze Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jul 19, 2017
155
355
191
Solving Pain
Why don’t you house hack one house and rent the other out? Then you have no living expenses and positive cashflow.

Then, you can worry about everything else.

Many here say to stay at the job til you have at least a prototype of what you’re selling. Others don’t leave until they can live on the income.

It is very normal to be event focused like most people. You will learn out of sheer frustration(your feeling of burn out) to focus on the most relevant thing at any given time.
 
OP
OP
Brewmacker

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
Why don’t you house hack one house and rent the other out? Then you have no living expenses and positive cashflow.

Then, you can worry about everything else.

Many here say to stay at the job til you have at least a prototype of what you’re selling. Others don’t leave until they can live on the income.

It is very normal to be event focused like most people. You will learn out of sheer frustration(your feeling of burn out) to focus on the most relevant thing at any given time.
Hey process, thanks a lot for the feedback!

By "house hack" I guess you mean split one house into 2 apart living areas?
That could be sooo easily achieved with this house & actually if I had no job right now that would be a great idea to save my investments. (i'll keep that one in mind!)

The problem for me right now is definitely not cash flow. I have very good "side walker" salary for my age. The real challenge for me is time and energy. With a large salary this unfortunately equates to management in a stressful, high demand job in a technical engineering department. It saps a lot of my energy and 50+ hours out of my waking life.

If I rented both properties as they are, then I would be more or less balanced out financially without having to work (but I wont be able afford to eat). The properties will tick over by themselves if rented.

I will definitely be working at something during the development of my Product to generate income. That is an absolute must. I just need a job with less stress & less hours which I will never get from my current employer.

Yes I agree being event focused is terrifying and stressful. I will have to keep that in check, thanks. I deliver multi-mil € products, one after the next. If there is anything I have learned over the years, it is the one question, "How do you eat an elephant? (one piece at a time)".
Even now, sometimes I slip into event focusing at work and have to catch myself.

Maybe it is wise to do a quick self assessment & examine my view on the project I am working on. Maybe I am looking in too many directions & not focusing on what I should be.

My intention right now is to break free from the 9-5 rat race, and the intent described in the post should have only focused on Step 1 of the project: Resourcing. Unfortunately right now I am the only resource and I want to shift that resource into a place where it can be most productive. It just is not working effectively now.
 

Jeff Noel

Gold Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Oct 26, 2018
566
1,124
369
Quebec, Canada
Don't get me wrong, I, for one, would love to leave town and go on a camping trip, working from the RV.I just feel like it would be a distraction for you.

Focus on building the business you want.

You say you're lacking time because of your stressful, time-consuming job, but money is not an issue. How long can you stay afloat without that job ? (Take into account house hacking as mentioned above)
I feel like you'd be better off keeping your house, leaving the job and going ALL-IN, 14 hours/day on your business than taking months to build a custom RV.

You'll be able to travel a lot once you exit the business you grew for a few years.

Edit: Also, stop hitting yourself on the head. You're not an idiot, you're not crazy. Only your own opinion of yourself matters, and if it's negative it won't help you at all man. Embrace who you are and evolve everyday.
 

Kevin88660

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Feb 8, 2019
391
331
162
Singapore
I really really need help & advice. I do not have anyone to talk too about this.

The people in my life will think I am going crazy and because I'm doubting my own sanity right now, they will probably convince/steer me to stay on my current path.

I have seen how you people on this forum, time & time again, offer idiots like me quality & impartial advice with level of patience & understanding that is beyond me.
It is really a beautiful environment here & I hope that you can offer me the affirmation/criticism I need to start sleeping peacefully again.

MJ, you have destroyed my life. This is an astonishing gift that you given & I will always be thankful to you for shattering this old reality.
Needless to say this re-birth will have drastic consequences and I am really not sure what the F*ck I am about to do.


Quick Intro
I'm male, 35 yo, Mechanical Engineer & single (thankfully)
Time & energy are the two biggest obstacles now holding me back.
I have a business idea & I am dying to get started.
For the past two months I have been:
  • Working 9-10 hours a day in my stressful Engineering Job (design management role),
  • 2-3 hours dedicated to fitness & health,
  • 1-2 hours healthy cooking + cleaning
  • 2-3 hours left for business development
  • Chill out hours = 0
During these 3 available hours I've been identifying & developing the tools necessary to execute a business. Of course I use as many hours in the weekend as I can.
These include learning to; program apps; releasing product in a foreign country; market research; marketing; etc. etc.
(don't worry, these aforementioned skill are not intended for critique here)

I am starting to burn out already. You guys who do this, have done this, or tried doing this with a family on top of it all? I salute you!

Plain and simple, this is not working for me. I cannot sleep because all the stress & this is further driving me mad.

I see two solutions:
1) Accept my scripted life, enjoy working a 40 hour week, live for the pension, marry the next one, have children & die and perish wealthy? F*ck THAT!!!
2) Take radical action to set off on a completely unscripted path? OH F*ck!!!!

Solution 1: MJ de Marco destroyed that life (thanks buddy!). I would rather die alone & poor than live a mediocre life without giving my best to the world.


Solution 2: The Reason I Need a FASTLANER Shrink (Therapist)!

So, I have a plan & yes it is F*cking Crazy, even for me.
I am just soooo F*cking 'Done' with this life now.
F*ck my amazing job & ridiculous working hours,
F*ck my two houses & mortgages,
F*ck my pathetic little life in little shitty whoTheFuckCaresVille.
F*ck F*ck F*ck it all!
I'm done, I'm Out, I Fold!!


From Hereon This is Where I Really Need Your Advice/Experience -

My Crazy Plan (before end of year 2019 until 2025 retirement):
  1. Cash in my UK pension (ca €20k) - it is sitting there in a pot doing nothing & helping no body.
  2. Sell my Brewery :(
  3. Buy/Build/Modify a VW Camper Van (or equivalent).
  4. Find a flexible job:
    1. to work when & where ever I want in Europe
    2. to generate cash - from my camper office
    3. generate the minimum required income to live comfortably in a camper van (plenty of YouTube expenses videos out there)
    4. preferably inline with what I will do in my day (e.g. fitness) or what need for the future (during execution).
    5. to allow maximum free time to focus on my core work (minimum 8 hours per day)
  5. Get my house rented out to cover the taxes & mortgage (let it pay for itself).
  6. The Apartment is already rented (paying for itself).
  7. Live at friend/camper and begin tying up all loose ends in home country
  8. Quit my Job/Ask for extended; open ended sabbatical
  9. Drive to Portugal or Spain or Italy or Greece or where I can work
  10. Work my butt off wherever I am
  11. Consider telling parents, people what I have done/am doing or not.

A Camper Van is Not Very FAST, but Can we Drive it in the FASTLANE?

A camper has MANY advantages with respect to Freedom & Exploring & Travelling. As a mechanical engineer this camper will be built to my own specification to ensure I can work & live even when off grid.
N.B. These wonderful things are not why we are here today, but it should play into the overall craziness equation.

The main foreseen advantages of a camper from a business point of view is that:
  • I can stay in any big city for any length of time in city-camping without spending much more money than a normal day parked beside a beach.
  • Compared to a cheap apartment in a big city, this is still a massive reduction in expenses during the start up phase.
  • If I want to travel to another city within Europe, I can drive always drive there in less than 24 hours.
  • No hotels, no flights etc.
  • If I want to recruit customers I will always have my office base & house with me in that particular city
  • Can always rent a desk in a city office, preferably with an entrepreneurial theme/atmosphere

Flexible Work:
This is going to be a challenge I think to maximize income whilst minimize hours in a sidewalk job.
I am not sure what type of viable 100% online jobs are available at this moment but a few ideas are:
  • Transcription
  • Translation (Dutch to English)
  • Online tutor
  • Teacher
Ideal Job:
Personal Trainer for the Bellyproof program (see link below REF1).
This will involve training people on a 5 week course from belly to six pack. For this I will most likely need a license & training from the London based founder Jacob.
Hopefully he has a list of contacts in Europe Mainland or receives requests from people who are interested in such a service.
This would involve 2-3 hours work 5 days a week, delivering a niche product with guaranteed results.
Also it meets my need of combining fitness with work which saves me additional hours to work on getting the business out there.
I have not brought this up with him yet because I know he is a busy guy and do not want to knock him off his course until the plan crystallizes a bit better.


Foreseen Challenges:
  • Loneliness could be an issue (thank god for tinder haha) - getting to know myself and facing my own inner demons (we all have them folks)
  • Tax issues (bit of experience working in multiple countries - good learning experience)
  • Getting used to frugality
  • Money (rainy day pot) for:
    • Tenants moving out [deposit+finding someone new],
    • Camper van and/or general unplanned maintenance,
    • Product roll out costs - Design, Advertising, Law Fees, Tax Fees, Registration Fees etc.
    • Tax

Worries, fears:

Absolutely NONE!


AND that is why I am here lovely people! It sounds so crazy & yet it feels so right!

My heart says go for it and my logical brain is scrambling to hang on to its pre-conditioned reality.

Why am I so okay with this idea?? Have I gone completely bonkers? Has MJ broken me?

Please Help Me Folks!

What am I missing here?
What am I risking here?
How does this picture compare to your experience?
Is it possible?
Am I being completely naive or foolish?
Is there a better more efficient way to go fast lane?

Thanks you all so much for your time. I really look forward to reading your advice here.

Regards,

B


REF1:
BellyProof / MovementFirst – Let's Get you Fit
Well. Welcome. I am glad that you are willing to a make a change to your life. If you hate your life now you should change. The question is how.

I have a few questions.

1) You have two mortgages that will pay themselves once you rented them out. Have you sit down with a banker or real estate agent to plan that out? I am asking because I was a loan department banker a fews back. What rate are you paying now? How good is your location in getting tenants? Have you made money from the appreciation and what about the idea of selling one house to make you cash rich? What about selling one property to diversify into high yield investment? You don’t really have to answer to me but I am just offering you things that you can consider.

2) Have you considered moving back with your parents if that is an option. i am a sales guy I choose money over pride every single time. It sounds better than living in a van.

3) Whats a brewery?

4) I am not sure about Tinder. I never used it and I heard it is the top five percent of guys in looks getting all the attention. I heard girls in UK do not date outside their social class. Is that true?

5)Personal Training is a brutally competitive space. What is your plan to stand out from the crowd? Have you thought of fitness related business other than being a trainer?

6)It seems that you want to modify your business to suit your lifestyle. Doing business where you want to enjoy you life sounds great if you are running a business selling ebook. I just do not think that is practical for most business that have a location focus. I am doing financial sales in Singapore because it has a high concentration of HNW individuals and it is where my network is. I fly to places that I want to have a holiday and keep it separate.
 
OP
OP
Brewmacker

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
Don't get me wrong, I, for one, would love to leave town and go on a camping trip, working from the RV.I just feel like it would be a distraction for you.

Focus on building the business you want.

You say you're lacking time because of your stressful, time-consuming job, but money is not an issue. How long can you stay afloat without that job ? (Take into account house hacking as mentioned above)
I feel like you'd be better off keeping your house, leaving the job and going ALL-IN, 14 hours/day on your business than taking months to build a custom RV.

You'll be able to travel a lot once you exit the business you grew for a few years.
Hello Jeff, thanks for the feedback mate :)

With house hacking I could probably stay afloat for about 6-8 months with a little investment in separating the property. If I got a bar job, or a temp PT job I could probably drag it out for a couple of years.

The Hack would be a conversion of my semi-professional workshop which is a USP for the property.
It would knock a significant proportion of the rental value.
Regardless that impact should be investigated further and weighed up in the final decision.

Maybe I could also just rent the work shop? And get a house mate? hmmm you guys are already coming up with some good ideas!

Thanks a lot!!
 

Tourmaline

Bronze Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Jun 4, 2019
211
158
85
Texas
If you're actually burning out taking a moment to rest and let your mind chill is necessary. If you're not burning out then keep at it.

Is your Brewery your hobby or?

Building a camper sounds like a distraction...at first I thought you'd just get a truck with a camper on it and live out of that.

Keep the fire going and get out of the scripted trap!
 

Hopeful

Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
Jun 8, 2019
46
65
107
Why not make your brewery Fastlane? It might seem romantic and exciting to pack up your bags and leave your life behind, but what if you have a viable business right under your nose?
 
OP
OP
Brewmacker

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
Well. Welcome. I am glad that you are willing to a make a change to your life. If you hate your life now you should change. The question is how.

I have a few questions.
Hi Kevin! Thanks for the great response. Let me answer what I can :)

1) You have two mortgages that will pay themselves once you rented them out. Have you sit down with a banker or real estate agent to plan that out? I am asking because I was a loan department banker a fews back. What rate are you paying now? How good is your location in getting tenants? Have you made money from the appreciation and what about the idea of selling one house to make you cash rich? What about selling one property to diversify into high yield investment? You don’t really have to answer to me but I am just offering you things that you can consider.

Yes last year I bought the house and negotiated a deal with the bank for the rental of the apartment. They have different but competitive intrest rates. These are fixed for the next 10 years.

The apartment has appreciated nicely and the house I only bought last year, so if I sell it now I lose money. Therefore I would prefer to rent it for a few years to appreciate and to get a return on the buying costs.

Location for both is very good. Not like London or Amsterdam, my city is small. But both located healthy rental locations. When I buy I always look to the rentability. Also the house has a USP and that is the garage. It is set up for semi professional industrial use.


2) Have you considered moving back with your parents if that is an option. i am a sales guy I choose money over pride every single time. It sounds better than living in a van.

hahaha, you havent met my mother! She would work me harder than my current employer.
Besides I live in a different country and although I have little shame or pride, she would drive me crazy within one week. No, a couple of oceans between us is just fine :)


3) Whats a brewery?
Where I make beer my friend! Lovely stuff!


4) I am not sure about Tinder. I never used it and I heard it is the top five percent of guys in looks getting all the attention. I heard girls in UK do not date outside their social class. Is that true?

hahaha, maybe they do the handsome bastards. But there are plenty of scraps left over for us mediocre guys hahaha

And English girls eh?? Forget them, there are plenty of lovely Irish ones across the sea!

5)Personal Training is a brutally competitive space. What is your plan to stand out from the crowd? Have you thought of fitness related business other than being a trainer?
Nooooo Noooo, this is not my thing!
I just what I do to keep fit and if on my journey that can keep my belly full and bills paid that would be great. There was a link in the original post from the guy who owns the company, in my opinion he stands out from the crowd.

6)It seems that you want to modify your business to suit your lifestyle. Doing business where you want to enjoy you life sounds great if you are running a business selling ebook. I just do not think that is practical for most business that have a location focus. I am doing financial sales in Singapore because it has a high concentration of HNW individuals and it is where my network is. I fly to places that I want to have a holiday and keep it separate.

Sorry, I did not mention my business idea in the post because that was not the focus of my problem.

I am focusing on an Online Website and App based business. It of course has a location based focus but hopefully on a global scale. When I mentioned driving from city to city, I am mainly focusing there on location based marketing. What sells in Spain may/will differ from Germany, therefore I will tweak things based on the audience and culture.
 

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OP
OP
Brewmacker

Brewmacker

Bronze Contributor
Read Millionaire Fastlane
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Jun 17, 2019
94
109
121
35
The Netherlands
If you're actually burning out taking a moment to rest and let your mind chill is necessary. If you're not burning out then keep at it.

Is your Brewery your hobby or?

Building a camper sounds like a distraction...at first I thought you'd just get a truck with a camper on it and live out of that.

Keep the fire going and get out of the scripted trap!
Hi Tourmaline.

I totally agree with regards to taking the time to chill to avoid a burnout. I can assure you I am taking the time needed to stay healthy. As you can image it can be frustrating when you just want to get stuck in and give it your all.

Yes brewing is a passion, which will stay as a hobby for me.

I live in the Netherlands & these guys are camper crazy. It is not hard to find conversion kits to take a normal workers van and turn it into camper van. I think it would take a solid 2 weeks of evening and weekends to get it fully kitted out to my spec.
Alternatively if I can find a completed one in my price range with good mileage I would jump at the offer.

"Keep the fire going and get out of the scripted trap!" - Will do buddy!

Thanks for chipping in!
 

Kevin88660

Bronze Contributor
I've Read UNSCRIPTED
Speedway Pass
Feb 8, 2019
391
331
162
Singapore
Hi Kevin! Thanks for the great response. Let me answer what I can :)

1) You have two mortgages that will pay themselves once you rented them out. Have you sit down with a banker or real estate agent to plan that out? I am asking because I was a loan department banker a fews back. What rate are you paying now? How good is your location in getting tenants? Have you made money from the appreciation and what about the idea of selling one house to make you cash rich? What about selling one property to diversify into high yield investment? You don’t really have to answer to me but I am just offering you things that you can consider.

Yes last year I bought the house and negotiated a deal with the bank for the rental of the apartment. They have different but competitive intrest rates. These are fixed for the next 10 years.

The apartment has appreciated nicely and the house I only bought last year, so if I sell it now I lose money. Therefore I would prefer to rent it for a few years to appreciate and to get a return on the buying costs.

Location for both is very good. Not like London or Amsterdam, my city is small. But both located healthy rental locations. When I buy I always look to the rentability. Also the house has a USP and that is the garage. It is set up for semi professional industrial use.


2) Have you considered moving back with your parents if that is an option. i am a sales guy I choose money over pride every single time. It sounds better than living in a van.

hahaha, you havent met my mother! She would work me harder than my current employer.
Besides I live in a different country and although I have little shame or pride, she would drive me crazy within one week. No, a couple of oceans between us is just fine :)


3) Whats a brewery?
Where I make beer my friend! Lovely stuff!


4) I am not sure about Tinder. I never used it and I heard it is the top five percent of guys in looks getting all the attention. I heard girls in UK do not date outside their social class. Is that true?

hahaha, maybe they do the handsome bastards. But there are plenty of scraps left over for us mediocre guys hahaha

And English girls eh?? Forget them, there are plenty of lovely Irish ones across the sea!

5)Personal Training is a brutally competitive space. What is your plan to stand out from the crowd? Have you thought of fitness related business other than being a trainer?
Nooooo Noooo, this is not my thing!
I just what I do to keep fit and if on my journey that can keep my belly full and bills paid that would be great. There was a link in the original post from the guy who owns the company, in my opinion he stands out from the crowd.

6)It seems that you want to modify your business to suit your lifestyle. Doing business where you want to enjoy you life sounds great if you are running a business selling ebook. I just do not think that is practical for most business that have a location focus. I am doing financial sales in Singapore because it has a high concentration of HNW individuals and it is where my network is. I fly to places that I want to have a holiday and keep it separate.

Sorry, I did not mention my business idea in the post because that was not the focus of my problem.

I am focusing on an Online Website and App based business. It of course has a location based focus but hopefully on a global scale. When I mentioned driving from city to city, I am mainly focusing there on location based marketing. What sells in Spain may/will differ from Germany, therefore I will tweak things based on the audience and culture.
Oh cool. Which city are you currently based in? I just thought that you are from UK since you mentioned cashing out UK pensions.

It is not easy to focus on so many things. I understand why it is driving you nuts. I encourage you to try what you want to do as soon as possible because it takes time to figure out what works and what does not work. When it becomes obvious that what works you can then narrow your focus on a few things that work.

I am in financial sales for two years and I realized that what really matters (at least from my experience) is call volume in my business- how many people I speak to a day. After reading a lot on health and fitness I realized that it is important to exercise daily. So I maintain a minimum numbers of call attempts a day and force myself to exercise every day. Even that sounds easy in theory is putting a lot of stress on me honestly to get used to the new regiment.
 
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Why not make your brewery Fastlane? It might seem romantic and exciting to pack up your bags and leave your life behind, but what if you have a viable business right under your nose?
I am a little stumped with your question mate haha.

I cannot give you a better answer other than my gut tells me a 'No' on this one.

This is just not how I want to add value to the world. I love the hobby and I am passionate about it. I love having bbqs and tasting evenings to share my craft.

Brewing beer is just not going to give every person a chance to live a better life, or make the world/environment a better place. Seriously jokes aside, its really not haha!
I want to contribute in a healthy way and I hope I never loose that point of view.
 

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I am a little stumped with your question mate haha.

I cannot give you a better answer other than my gut tells me a 'No' on this one.

This is just not how I want to add value to the world. I love the hobby and I am passionate about it. I love having bbqs and tasting evenings to share my craft.

Brewing beer is just not going to give every person a chance to live a better life, or make the world/environment a better place. Seriously jokes aside, its really not haha!
I want to contribute in a healthy way and I hope I never loose that point of view.
Brew some "zero alcohol" low sugar healthy drink then ;) Bonus points if it doesn't taste crap.
 
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Oh cool. Which city are you currently based in? I just thought that you are from UK since you mentioned cashing out UK pensions.

It is not easy to focus on so many things. I understand why it is driving you nuts. I encourage you to try what you want to do as soon as possible because it takes time to figure out what works and what does not work. When it becomes obvious that what works you can then narrow your focus on a few things that work.

I am in financial sales for two years and I realized that what really matters (at least from my experience) is call volume in my business- how many people I speak to a day. After reading a lot on health and fitness I realized that it is important to exercise daily. So I maintain a minimum numbers of call attempts a day and force myself to exercise every day. Even that sounds easy in theory is putting a lot of stress on me honestly to get used to the new regiment.

I live now in a small city in the Netherlands.
The work health balance was really difficult for me also in the beginning.
I made the decision to put my health before that of the company. Why?
Because really there is only one person that gives a shit about you and that is you (and family possibly). Put your health first above all else. I wish you good luck Kevin!
Thanks again for the advice!
 

Primeperiwinkle

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So basically you’re making a ton of money, you own two properties, you have a successful career where you’re needed and respected, an excellent hobby you love, you’re healthy and...

You’re miserable?

Is that right?
 

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I am a little stumped with your question mate haha.

I cannot give you a better answer other than my gut tells me a 'No' on this one.

This is just not how I want to add value to the world. I love the hobby and I am passionate about it. I love having bbqs and tasting evenings to share my craft.

Brewing beer is just not going to give every person a chance to live a better life, or make the world/environment a better place. Seriously jokes aside, its really not haha!
I want to contribute in a healthy way and I hope I never loose that point of view.
I was under the impression that your "brewery" was a business. At least here in the US, where I live, that word refers to a business that makes and sells beer. Do you just brew as a hobby?
 

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So basically you’re making a ton of money, you own two properties, you have a successful career where you’re needed and respected, an excellent hobby you love, you’re healthy and...

You’re miserable?

Is that right?
I am in one of the richest city in Asia and rarely I heard someone own two properties at age of 35 without Daddy’s money.
 

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Hey process, thanks a lot for the feedback!

By "house hack" I guess you mean split one house into 2 apart living areas?
That could be sooo easily achieved with this house & actually if I had no job right now that would be a great idea to save my investments. (i'll keep that one in mind!)

The problem for me right now is definitely not cash flow. I have very good "side walker" salary for my age. The real challenge for me is time and energy. With a large salary this unfortunately equates to management in a stressful, high demand job in a technical engineering department. It saps a lot of my energy and 50+ hours out of my waking life.

If I rented both properties as they are, then I would be more or less balanced out financially without having to work (but I wont be able afford to eat). The properties will tick over by themselves if rented.

I will definitely be working at something during the development of my Product to generate income. That is an absolute must. I just need a job with less stress & less hours which I will never get from my current employer.

Yes I agree being event focused is terrifying and stressful. I will have to keep that in check, thanks. I deliver multi-mil € products, one after the next. If there is anything I have learned over the years, it is the one question, "How do you eat an elephant? (one piece at a time)".
Even now, sometimes I slip into event focusing at work and have to catch myself.

Maybe it is wise to do a quick self assessment & examine my view on the project I am working on. Maybe I am looking in too many directions & not focusing on what I should be.

My intention right now is to break free from the 9-5 rat race, and the intent described in the post should have only focused on Step 1 of the project: Resourcing. Unfortunately right now I am the only resource and I want to shift that resource into a place where it can be most productive. It just is not working effectively now.
Yes house hacking is where you make a roommate’s rent cover your mortgage and expenses. Each extra house increases your scale and turbo boosts your Fastlane.

Putting yourself in the position to only need a few hundred dollars takes leverage out of your bosses’ hands.


It allows you to focus on your own ends.

My “boss” could fire me, but it wouldn’t matter since I am independent from it income wise. I work there for the inside experience and 2 years of proven leveragable income.
 

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So basically you’re making a ton of money, you own two properties, you have a successful career where you’re needed and respected, an excellent hobby you love, you’re healthy and...

You’re miserable?

Is that right?
Very Good question @Primeperiwinkle !
A little direct & maybe a bit morbid, but it made me re-write my response from scratch three times.

I feel vulnerable admitting it, but yes maybe I am miserable.

You write my life down in down in such a way that implies, I should really appreciate these things in my life.
I still do somewhat, or at least I really did one year ago. I was even a little proud of what I had built.

Sadly, I was also heavily self medicating with a few bottles of wine a day and maybe the odd joint, I was unhealthily obese, eating crap and wasting my life in front of a TV. But i was happy :)

9 months later, now that I am sober the majority of the time, back in the best shape & fitness level I have been in years, eating healthy, devouring a few books per week and bettering myself at every spare chance I get, how is it that now I am miserable? Strange that.

The simple reason is, all of that stuff mentioned in your question is just not important to me (of course there are reasons why not, but I wont bore you). These things are important to my parents or maintain what other people expect from me.
To me these things all just stuff paid for by excessive use of my time & energy & freedom.

I have made myself miserable (not in a mopey way, more discontented), and I own that. It is on me to change the situation, and continue to change myself.

Thanks very much for your question, it actually helped me a lot.
 

Primeperiwinkle

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Very Good question @Primeperiwinkle !
A little direct & maybe a bit morbid, but it made me re-write my response from scratch three times.

I feel vulnerable admitting it, but yes maybe I am miserable.

You write my life down in down in such a way that implies, I should really appreciate these things in my life.
I still do somewhat, or at least I really did one year ago. I was even a little proud of what I had built.

Sadly, I was also heavily self medicating with a few bottles of wine a day and maybe the odd joint, I was unhealthily obese, eating crap and wasting my life in front of a TV. But i was happy :)

9 months later, now that I am sober the majority of the time, back in the best shape & fitness level I have been in years, eating healthy, devouring a few books per week and bettering myself at every spare chance I get, how is it that now I am miserable? Strange that.

The simple reason is, all of that stuff mentioned in your question is just not important to me (of course there are reasons why not, but I wont bore you). These things are important to my parents or maintain what other people expect from me.
To me these things all just stuff paid for by excessive use of my time & energy & freedom.

I have made myself miserable (not in a mopey way, more discontented), and I own that. It is on me to change the situation, and continue to change myself.

Thanks very much for your question, it actually helped me a lot.
So basically you’re saying that your current surroundings (job, home, hobby) don’t fit your new (healthy, focused, driven) identity?
 
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So basically you’re saying that your current surroundings (job, home, hobby) don’t fit your new (healthy, focused, driven) identity?
Hello again :)

I had an identity (or an egotistical view) of myself in the past years of my life & that has been shattered one piece at a time over the last months and has not come back fortunately.

I am not sure I have/want a new identity because it has the potential to be self limiting whether that is consciously or subconsciously. Maybe it was my own weakness (though I see it in other peoples behaviour to) that I actually lived by that sense of identity and would even protect these beliefs from others but more importantly myself.

My apologies if I am bastadarizing your interpretation of 'identity'. I link it to the 'self' and maybe that is not what you mean. Maybe the next part is more inline with what you mean.

In last year I have definitely begun to reframe my outlook in life and for the future.

a) You are very right, Health is a massive part of that reframe. This is not because I want to be seen as healthy, I want to be healthy. I am working out alone at home, in my living room at 5.30 in the morning with the curtains closed. This is between me and me. Without good health there is nothing or life is severely limited.
b) I love my job, but the next 40 years trapped working day in day out, waiting for the weekend or a holiday/vacation (that is limited) by the company & has to be requested & slotted in and agenda by my boss just doesn't sit well.
Work also impacts my health because for the majority of my day I remain effectively inactive. I have to get up at 05.30 am just to slot a workout into my day.
I swear to you, if I could work 20 hours and get paid 50% less I would. Why?
c) Time! Time Time Time Time! I have so many things I want to do and to learn purely for self interest. Hobbies, for example I play piano, guitar, tennis, golf, beer brewing, home projects (like building control systems for my home brewery), travelling. I once had time to do at least a combination of a few of these things, I once had the energy to do all these things. I want to learn my own Irish language before I leave this world, I want to learn Spanish. I want to explore and cook and eat. Time is precious.
d) Home - is great, my favourite place :)
I am still young, fit and able to rough it with the best of them so a house is a luxury that I would happily give up for a few years just to invest now for more time in the future.
e) Drive and focus come naturally from the challenge, be that setting up a new business or playing a piano or getting through a work out set.
 

Primeperiwinkle

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I’m really helping you flesh out your ideas by forcing you to write stuff. It’s what I wish somebody had done for me six months ago when I was flipping out, had burn out, was going kinda crazy.

I understand freaking out. I want you to have peace about what you choose to do. I want you to feel like you’re making the right decision for you.
 

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@Brewmacker If one is disconnected from themselves, nature, and life itself, then they will be miserable no matter how good things may seem on paper.

Do you know who you are and why you exists on this planet? If not, that, seeking that answer may help more than anything else.

In all your words I do not see you speak about how you want to help and serve others. It does not mean neglecting yourself, but this flows naturally when you are connected to yourself first and then others second. If you are not connected to yourself however, then I do not believe it is possible to be connected to others either.
 

BB13

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Personally I get the impression that this is a phase of life issue. You work hard, you have achieved a lot already, you continue to work hard.... but.... something is not quite right.

You are 35, no sign of serious relationship (who on earth uses Tinder these days!!), no real love, no offspring, no own family? That is your entire biological purpose.

Who took that away from you and why? How did that happen?

Consider that you may be looking for something else at this stage in your life, not necessarily monetary success and financial independence.

You are not going mad, just seem slightly lost and confused.

MJ DeMarco might agree - wealth means: family, health and freedom. That is my favourite part of his book, inter alia.

Is it possible you got your priorities wrong?

Please forgive me if I am offending you in any way. I am just looking at things from another angle.
All good wishes
BB13
 
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What am I missing here?
What am I risking here?
I think developing app inside a van is not going to work , you really need some house or office space to focus and to have good cooling /heating system that make you work comfortably.
I didnt understand why you want to live like homeless, maybe renting your house and keep the basement for you is better solution , or moving to one room apartment.
I think you are really overreacting , maybe you need some time off from your work to travel, but for building a serious high tech business, living on generator beside the beach will not be a good idea.
 

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