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Late Bloomer's touchy-feely exploration of feelings and actions

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Sully1994

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@Late Bloomer

Since no one has acknowledged it- I'll be the first .

I'm sorry that your wife died of cancer. I'm sorry that you contracted cancer, and that it affected your ability to work. That is truly terrible, and I would not wish that upon anyone.

I suspect you are frustrated because no one has acknowledged this in their replies to you- even though you've mentioned it multiple times.

Why no one has mentioned it?

There could be a couple reasons.

A: They don't read your posts, or simply just skim the beginning and ends of them.

B: They don't give a shit.

Whatever the case ( I suspect it's A) know this. People here want you to succeed. There's no doubt that you have suffered a great deal in your life. It would be nice if people could show some empathy.

But whether they do or don't, one thing is for sure. The market has no empathy. Will focusing on hardships you have endured help you advance in business? Most likely not. The community here wants you to focus on your goals, and take action to achieve them.

that is what gets recognized here. That is what gets applauded.

Hope this helps.
 
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Merging Left

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You've had a rough go of it the last several years. I want to echo @Sully1994 in expressing my sympathies for your hardships and for your losses.

I'd like to touch on the direction this thread has gone, since I don't think this is what you were hoping for when you created this thread, and I'd like you to get back on track.

Just like in the books, this forum is about taking action and working towards a definable goal that will improve your life in unimaginable ways. It's about the process.

This thread began with your process. You're exploring Upwork as a channel for gaining clients and earning income as a freelancer. Excellent! But you got stuck. You got stuck at the terms and conditions for working on Upwork, and it set you back. That was not well received by the forum, understandably so. A few forum members called you out as having a lame excuse for taking so long (arguable) and told you to keep pressing forward. Maybe that's not what you wanted to hear, but if you break it down, they really were words of encouragement and trying to push you towards success.

Since then, this thread has deteriorated into you defending your actions because you have faced significant hardships. There is no doubt - you have faced significant hardships, and awful traumatic experiences that you did not deserve. But this forum is not here to help you reconcile those issues. That's a different place.

This forum serves to push you to pick yourself up and succeed DESPITE your hardships. We, the community, are not here to coddle you. We are here to push you, even if it makes you uncomfortable. We're here to tell you when your thoughts are leading you down an unproductive path and we try to get you back on track. Our initial efforts are (almost) always with good intentions. When you push back, however, we push back harder. We're trying to help, with absolutely no benefit to ourselves. So when our good intentions get shot down, it's not received well.

Then we enter what has now become you closing up and defending yourself because of your past hardships. Frankly, that isn't important to you succeeding now and in the future. What's important is you get back on track, land a gig, get paid, and come tell us about it. And you will receive plenty of congratulations and encouragement and feedback on how to continue to improve.

A few in here have asked you to take action and post results. Stop spending time resopnding to your critics. Even if it takes 10 minutes, it's not worth your mental and emotional energy. Get back on track. Get results. We want you to succeed.
 

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Ah, I was mistaken about the functionality of this forum.

If your "False" was based on already knowing that there is not a delete function, then your hiding that information was deliberately obfuscating and unhelpful.

If you didn't know that, then you made a false assumption about my intentions, which was also unhelpful.

Dude, WTF.

Just start getting stuff done and posting about stuff that has been done. You will get much different replies.

Just wait a day until you can post something like, Got a gig last night and made $100 with 30 minutes of work. Don't post today that you might have a gig that pays $100 for 30 minutes of work. See the difference? I mean I might have a date with Jennifer Lawrence tomorrow!
 
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Envious

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I haven't read the action faker thread and I don't think I've seen the user Lordphenny here yet. Any connection between what I wrote and what he wrote is total coincidence.

Part of the mindset shift from me, from corporate drone who occasionally freelances a little, to long term sustainable, successful freelancer, is to take action without waiting for all the steps to be laid out in front of me. One reason I joined here is to get pushed and poked to encourage me to take action.

I'm on here about an hour or two hours a day, and I usually type fast. Expressing my thoughts and feelings that I already know, comes easily to me. I have typed up how I feel and think about things in online forums for over 20 years now. It flows.

Reading legal terms for a new service, then registering myself in compliance with the terms and jargon of a whole new type of online advertising platform I've not used before, doesn't come fast and easy for me. It's one of my least favorite, least skillful, and slowest things to do. And this post is also not at all tongue in cheek or exaggerated: that kind of "but what if this fails" proofreading is both slower and more intimidating for me after having had chemo.

When I can afford an administrative assistant I should get one. This is also no joke.

In the case of Upwork it took me several hours to go through all their information, to identify exactly what they want me to agree to, and to see that I have some concerns. Once I identified my concerns, I did a web search to see if others were concerned, or if there were articles from people who might say "these terms are scary but don't worry." I found that those concerns do have a basis in fact from others who report being screwed by Upwork.

I am broke, that's literally true. But that doesn't mean a $0 balance. I have under $100 available, a registered car with a month's worth of gas for little trips around town, 2 or 3 weeks worth of food on hand, and housing through May. The housing includes a noisy roommate with an irregular schedule, lots of cement trucks and bulldozers coming and going for a major construction project in the next block, and a location half a mile from the busiest freight train route in the state with literally 50 freight trains a day. So, getting out to the library really does help me think better.

Broke can include a few dollars on hand that can be used to buy a cheap box of pens. So, all of that was literally true reporting. I never said that buying pens was a valid substitute for sending proposals to prospective clients. It's just a random thing that happened to come up at the discount warehouse. I write faster and my hand hurts less (a long term chemo side effect for me) when I have pens I enjoy. It was nice to find 'em on sale for dirt cheap. None of this is sarcastic.

I am fast and have experience in writing business letters and making proposals. Once I feel safe about using the platform, that I know their rules and policies so I'm unlikely to get kicked off of it or screwed out of money I make, it will be fast and easy for me to create query letters, pitches and proposals, to negotiate and close sales.

I have no concerns about that part. It's the logistics and legalities of a whole new way of doing business, with a massive pile of legal documentation and new terms and procedures for working the platform itself. These are the parts that are brand new and intimidating to me. When something is new and scary to me, I have a tendency to slow down and try to take a closer look at it.

I also spent some time today on a transcription job for an existing client I already got through a mutual friend, and I spent some time talking with another old friend who might be a great team member for projects I can pitch. Meanwhile I will help her with a revision to her own business web site as a free favor for her, and as a portfolio builder for me. So the day wasn't a total waste.

I also realized that because of my concerns about the freelance gig platforms, I should split my time immediately between them and Fox's method to directly approach web design clients, who can provide me a check immediately without any third party intermediary platform in the way.

You're completely over thinking this.
Set ONE goal for the day and EXECUTE that, then move onto the next thing.

GOAL 1: Create your upwork profile.
GOAL 2: Draft a pitch email you're going to send to potential clients.
GOAL 3: Send out that pitch to potential clients and wait for their response.

And so on and so forth.

Just focus on the one thing each day and you'll make progress.

And don't write a really long reply to this ;)

Good luck.
 

Roli

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I came back on briefly tonight to respectfully request that you delete this needlessly argumentative, confrontational, disrespectful, and negatively assumptive comment of yours.

.

You need to develop a thicker skin, this forum isn't about touchy feely pats on the back, and handing out participation medals. It is about getting advice from people who are at various stages of their business development.

It is about finding out the most effective ways to boost your income and create a fastlane business. The comment you point to, is pointing out that you are documenting a lot of time wasting and action faking.

Even if you are an ex-president of the United States, you should be able to fill in a basic Fiverr/Upwork profile in a morning, it should not take days.

If you go through the various posts here, especially by @SinisterLex you will see your Fiverr/Upwork profile has very little to do with the work you get/don't get on those sites. It is about your approach to potential clients, it is about your answers to job posts, there are countless posts on this forum which demonstrate that the person who considers their approach and refines that, will gain advantage over the most 'impressive' profiles on the internet.

Tough love coming in 3 .. 2...

You are action faking, you spend your days doing the digital equivalent of navel gazing, if you continue along this path you will stay in the slow lane. The only way to shake your inactivity, is to face up to it and be honest with yourself about how much of your actions are actually effecting your bottom line.

If you post another long-winded diatribe about how you went to lunch and used photoshop and blah, blah, blah, I very much doubt you will get any meaningful responses that will help you in your quest to join the fastlane.

The kind of progress you should be posting is:

1. Identified n problems today

2. Sent out n emails, used x responses, will monitor which ones work.

3. Put y plan into action to increase income.

Then eventually

4. Got first gig, seemed to be because of response C, will formulate more emails around that response to see if I can generate some more gigs.

Filling in a profile, using photoshop, sending an email, or stopping your entire day because of an insignificant website glitch is NOT progress.

Tough love over.

Good luck, I hope you find lots to do today.
 

Fastlane Liam

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How to click here to put in a password and agree to the terms, is not the problem.

Exactly what terms am I agreeing to? That's what slowed me down.

I've never bought real estate, but I have worked for a mortgage company. I did troubleshooting on their sales software, so I got very familiar with all the paperwork that goes into the stack for a mortgage. And, that each and every clause is there because the company got burned in the past, or their attorneys are afraid they might get burned. Or, it's a way they can squeeze out more profits by tilting the playing field in their favor.

Sales reps urged buyers to not bother to read all that stuff, just sign here because it doesn't matter and we have to close this deal today. But, the buyer is legally obligated to what's actually on those pages, not to the opinions of the sales rep that it doesn't matter and there's no time to read that stuff.

When the mortgage crisis hit, many people lost their homes because the clauses they assumed don't matter... actually did. What they thought was meaningless boilerplate small print stuff that could never affect them... actually did. This personally happened to people I care about. Some other friends I care about did read what they actually agreed to, which let them take steps that saved their home in the financial crisis.

From that experience and some other experiences, I actually read all the terms of service, privacy policies, user agreements, dispute provisions, etc. of something that affects my livelihood and my reputation.

There is actually MORE of this legal material "incorporated by reference" in agreeing to an Upwork registration, than it takes to get a 30 year mortgage on a million dollar property!

There is MORE to legally agree to, in order to join Upwork, than I had to accept in order to get my cancer surgery!

If all the legal portion were printed, it would come to dozens of pages. In addition, there's a 31 page getting started guide they recommend. In addition, there are about 50 items in their support section explaining the terms and procedures.

I honestly don't see how anyone could actually know what they are agreeing to with Upwork, with less than a few hours of reading.

One could assume that it's all fine and doesn't matter. If it didn't matter, why do they include it? Why don't they just not have it, since it doesn't matter and they'll never apply it?




In other words... no due process, no need for them to prove but merely to feel that they suspect, no explanation needed, no appeal process.

These are my concerns. Perhaps they are irrelevant and frivolous.

But, these people say that clauses like these actually were used against them:
TIL Freelancing site Upwork suddenly "Suspends" many freelancer's accounts with a very shitty reason • r/freelance
Why you should never use Upwork | Hacker News
Work online. Travel the world.
Upwork Review: Why It’s a Battle YOU Won’t Win

The authors of the negative reports: are they all lying?

I believe that some people are making a lot of money using Upwork.
I also believe that some people really are getting screwed big time by Upwork.

I believe I can most likely make money and not get screwed by the platform.
But I do want to know what I'm up against.

Some people become bold adventurers after a brush with death.

Some, such as myself, become more cautious.

I'll tell you about my Upwork and Fiverr registrations tomorrow.

Nothing in this post is tongue in cheek or sarcastic.
Dude, you're not buying a house - you're signing up to Upwork.

You spent an entire day buying pens.

You spent today writing out these long waffley responses,

Is it any suprise you're broke?
 
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Henry Jones

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Hi Chris,

I am not sure what advice is given in regards to Fiverr on the other threads, but I will give you what I have learned.

Before I got a Job, I used to write on Fiverr, making about $1000 a month (While studying so not fulltime)

That was 3-4 years ago so my advice might be old but still worth a try.

Make sure your profile is completed as fully as possible, link all posiblle acounts like facebook, google+, linkedin etc. It gives you more authority.

When you post gigs for sale, use all the available space. There is not such a thing as too much info on Fiverr. I sometimes wished they gave me more space. Also, post unique pictures on your gig. Use Canva or other free graphic design software.

Include a video. Video gigs rank better. If you don't want to show yourself on camera, use Windows Movie Maker os something similiar and make a slide show.

People prefer using people who are online. Log in to your Fiverr, and use a refresh extension to refresh your page every few minutes. This allows people to find you easier.

Reply to questions and queries as quickly as possible. If your response time is low (Try to aim for 1 hour or less), you will rank better, and give customers more trust and confidence. Achieve this by downloading the fiverr app and replying as quickly as possible.

In the beginning, I offered way more to people, for way less, to encourage them to buy. New accounts with no ratings are scrary to buyers, but worth a chance when they offer alot for not that much.

Then offer more. I used to surprise customers with extras they did not expect. I included more words, pictures, etc. (More on that in a moment)

Then, when you deliver, ask for feedback and ratings. I got so much more feedback when I asked for it. But only when you deserved it. I asked for 5 star ratings, and if they think I didn't deserve it, I will do the job over, or refund them their money. Sure it might be counter productive, but a five star rating does wonders.

When you get more ratings, you can start bringing up your prices to reflect market rates or more.

Customer Service is everything. Be personal, use their names, and use unique messages when you speak with them. A lot of people used generic copy and paste answers.

You say you are going to offer writing services. Try to include images as a bonus. Get a few from pixabay or similiar and include them. Make sure they are royalty free though, and let them know it's royalty free. Over deliver as much as possible.

Never ever be late with deliveries. It will rank you badly and will get you tons of negative reviews.
Unforturtenetely that is all I have time for now, I have to meet someone in 10 minutes, but if you want any more info, let me know and I will gladly assist.



 

MJ DeMarco

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@Merging Left and @Sully1994

Well said guys, very proud of your response. And it also demonstrates why we don't delete threads -- your responses should not go unseen to anyone.

@Late Bloomer -- to echo what has been said, we're your cheerleaders, but we're also here to coach as well. A coach instructs, corrects, and encourages. The coach wants you to win. We want you to win and make progress. And be proud of where you are going.
 
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Henry Jones

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Hi Chris,

I am not sure if your post is tongue in the cheek?

You say you're broke then buy a box of pens? Also, in the action fake thread one of the things listed is buying pens instead of doing actual work.

Then, there was a guy named Lordphenny who used to list his shopping trips also as work he got done. Are you taking a stab at that?

How long did it take you type out that reply, while you could have registered on upwork and fiverr?

I'm pretty sure your post is tongue in the cheek and sarcastic though.
 

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You've had a rough go of it the last several years. I want to echo @Sully1994 in expressing my sympathies for your hardships and for your losses.

I'd like to touch on the direction this thread has gone, since I don't think this is what you were hoping for when you created this thread, and I'd like you to get back on track.

Just like in the books, this forum is about taking action and working towards a definable goal that will improve your life in unimaginable ways. It's about the process.

This thread began with your process. You're exploring Upwork as a channel for gaining clients and earning income as a freelancer. Excellent! But you got stuck. You got stuck at the terms and conditions for working on Upwork, and it set you back. That was not well received by the forum, understandably so. A few forum members called you out as having a lame excuse for taking so long (arguable) and told you to keep pressing forward. Maybe that's not what you wanted to hear, but if you break it down, they really were words of encouragement and trying to push you towards success.

Since then, this thread has deteriorated into you defending your actions because you have faced significant hardships. There is no doubt - you have faced significant hardships, and awful traumatic experiences that you did not deserve. But this forum is not here to help you reconcile those issues. That's a different place.

This forum serves to push you to pick yourself up and succeed DESPITE your hardships. We, the community, are not here to coddle you. We are here to push you, even if it makes you uncomfortable. We're here to tell you when your thoughts are leading you down an unproductive path and we try to get you back on track. Our initial efforts are (almost) always with good intentions. When you push back, however, we push back harder. We're trying to help, with absolutely no benefit to ourselves. So when our good intentions get shot down, it's not received well.

Then we enter what has now become you closing up and defending yourself because of your past hardships. Frankly, that isn't important to you succeeding now and in the future. What's important is you get back on track, land a gig, get paid, and come tell us about it. And you will receive plenty of congratulations and encouragement and feedback on how to continue to improve.

A few in here have asked you to take action and post results. Stop spending time resopnding to your critics. Even if it takes 10 minutes, it's not worth your mental and emotional energy. Get back on track. Get results. We want you to succeed.
Well said.

@Late Bloomer I want to respectfully apologize for my posts. I should’ve been respectful. Instead of replying false, I should’ve replied sorry but this rule here makes deleting a thread not viable. My bad man.
 

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Chop, chop. How many gigs did you land today? How many clients did you contact? What other platforms could get you in front of clients?
 

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Hey Late Bloomer,

Do you have any measurable goals or targets set?

Such as:
  • How much you want to make a month?
  • How many clients you want to close per month?
  • The price you'd like to charge per website?
  • If you'd like to make X amount of $ by X date?
I ask because it's easy to get bogged down in things like signing up for bidding sites and chasing after $50 bids. But is it really the best use of your time?

When you couldn't sign up for UpWork, did you ring any local businesses in the mean time? Have you pitched to anyone today? If not, why not?

People will be stoked to read your posts if you have something to report like, "I rang 10 local businesses today, offering to do their site for $100, 2 are interested and I'm following up tomorrow".

That's taking action, that's worthy of respect.

But buying pens and telling us what browser is your favourite is not a good use of your time or our time. That's why you are getting negative replies. People don't dislike you, they just dislike what you're sharing.
 

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Who changed the thread title to that?

Not me, I think the OP did.

@Late Bloomer -- would you like me to move this thread to the EXECUTION category? That type of thread takes on more of a diary thread, might be suitable for your updates.
 

Merging Left

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If you're so concerned with the terms of Upwork, which are really there to protect them; not to screw you (remember, they get paid when you get paid), just go post ads on Craigslist for freelance gigs, or send cold e-mails, or cold calls, or... anything. Just do something.
 

Fastlane Liam

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Speed bump day!

I was just about ready to go to the freelance gig sites and create some profiles. Went to the library to be in a studious setting for this task.

Then I got a note from a friend who knows I'm broke. He invited me to lunch (he found a 2 for 1 coupon to his favorite restaurant), and then a Costco run. That's a useful, thoughtful invitation for a broke guy without his own membership to the discount warehouse of peanut butter sold by the 55 gallon drum, so of course I accepted.

I figured he'd let me know in a few minutes to head over to the restaurant. Expecting that, I thought I shouldn't get too deep into a signup process. I read through the legal terms, privacy policy, payment policy, etc. etc. for the freelance gig sites and got feeling more and more overwhelmed.

After a few hours, I realized I was so overwhelmed because I was hungry! Checked back with my friend, and wound up heading to lunch about three hours later than I had originally thought. No wonder I was so vague and spacey. If I'd have had any idea, I'd have got my own meal and known I had time to do my signups.

I didn't get any peanut butter, but I did pick up a heck of great deal on a box of enough pens to let me write out all my big ideas through the end of the year! :hilarious:

Got back home and couldn't get myself back into enthusiasm for the sign-up process.

So I know this goes against all the principles of "just do it right now," but I decided to move my signup tasks to tomorrow, get up early and hopefully crank it out quickly... or, if I get stuck again tomorrow, recognize that within about an hour and ask for help here from the people who've shared about their successes with those sites.
Cmon man I signed up to upwork on my phone before going to work one morning
Its not hard
 
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Envious

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Hi Chris,

I am not sure if your post is tongue in the cheek?

You say you're broke then buy a box of pens? Also, in the action fake thread one of the things listed is buying pens instead of doing actual work.

Then, there was a guy named Lordphenny who used to list his shopping trips also as work he got done. Are you taking a stab at that?

How long did it take you type out that reply, while you could have registered on upwork and fiverr?

I'm pretty sure your post is tongue in the cheek and sarcastic though.
I am actually concerned about how many long and detailed posts Late Bloomer is writing on this forum.
Wondering if we have a action faker here?
 

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Hi Chris,

I am not sure if your post is tongue in the cheek?

You say you're broke then buy a box of pens? Also, in the action fake thread one of the things listed is buying pens instead of doing actual work.

Then, there was a guy named Lordphenny who used to list his shopping trips also as work he got done. Are you taking a stab at that?

How long did it take you type out that reply, while you could have registered on upwork and fiverr?

I'm pretty sure your post is tongue in the cheek and sarcastic though.
I only have TWO spare pens in my drawer right now lol.

One pen lasts for a F*cking long time, if used well.
A box of 30 pens can last for six months or more.

On Upwork, the approval is not the problem or the hard part. It's the actual structuring of the first emails to potential clients. The first emails take the LONGEST in the beginning because you are studying the client's background and his freelancers who worked with him so that you know what they need, and how to communicate it to them.

Then there's the exchange of correspondence, sample work, feedback and everything...and THAT is what takes time. By then though, you would be up to something!
 
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Envious

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@Late Bloomer Don’t let past hardships dictact how the rest of your life will be. You’ve been through more than most, but you’re still here and you’re still fighting.
People here want you to succeed and look back at your life and say “ That was a hell of ride, but it was all worth it”

Don’t give up on this forum, open up and try to take the critiscim on board, if it’s rude or unhelpful, ignore it.
 
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Outta here for today, see ya tomorrow. Gotta get back to work, and do a bunch more writing so that I get to keep the money my client sent me earlier today. :)
 
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"I have strong talent, knowledge, and experience in communications and in technology."

Use them to identify an unsolved problem within one or both of those industries, then set about solving it, and you'll do fine.
 

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Argue

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Which part is false? That the software allows user to delete their own threads?

Or, are you claiming that you know more about my own decisions and intentions than I do? If so, what is the nature of your psychic powers that let you see into my soul, and when will you pick up James Randi's million dollar prize for those who can prove their psychic powers?

Ten minute countdown to my deleting this thread: it's now 2:49 pm CDT. When this thread is gone at 3:00 pm CDT, in what way will you unconditionally apologize for your arrogant false assumption bullshit you hallucinated about knowing more than I do about the contents of my intentions?
IMPORTANT! - Delete thread - please don't ask.
 

Roli

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In my defence, by the time I read this thread, the OP had deleted all of the cancer stuff, all I read was lots of waffling about making phone calls and rearranging stationary.

So @latebloomer, I am sorry for your loss, I lost my dear sister to that horrible disease last year, and I hope you yourself are in good health.

Apart from that, we are trying to help you out and this is an environment whereby nobody will congratulate you on thinking about taking action, however we will support you on your journey.

Good luck.
 

NanoDrake

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As a personal rule, If I don't get kicked in the face at least every two weeks, it means I'm not growing.

I do understand that receiving free kicks in the face on a forum populated with some rambo kids behind a keyboard might be irritating but, as some wise guys expressed, the bottom line here is to push onwards, as a stoic excercise, try to imagine what would have happened if you wrote the opposite of what you have written so far.

I do understand the hardships of your past, but I invite you to focus on the principle that the best is yet to come, if you want it.

Onward and forward my friend.
 

Dubidu

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I think you guys are being unnecessarily harsh - I get it: it's the no BS Fastlane Forum but to me Late Bloomer is processing some stuff and being the richest person in the graveyard is in no-one's interest. @LateBloomer I wonder if you ought to get some therapy to deal with your own medical issues/the death of your loved one and your childhood issues. That's a lot for any life to cope with and the inaction so many posters are berating you for/are dismissing can actually be a symptom of depression. I know plenty of high functioning depressives but you've had a lot to deal with - maybe try a free group in your area/there's lots of advice online too. I wish you well.
 
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