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I suck. (Can you help someone out of a rut?)

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daivey

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April 6, 2014, I joined these forums. I wasn't much back then... and I don't think I'm much now.

Here's my story for you young-guns joining these forums.

I was always pushed into academics. This is the way. High school teachers, parents, aunts/uncles: "go to school" "become doctor, lawyer, accountant" etc. If you don't go to university, you will be a failure at life.
During high school I did alright for the most part. I never studied too hard, never really applied my self. I scored about average.
When it came time to apply to universities, I didn't get into the programs I wanted too. I did get into a few, but, didn't get those esteemed "science" programs that I was destined to go into.

So, I decided I would take a leap year to boost up my grades. I took a semester at a different high school, got my grades up across the board and that year got into all the programs I wanted too (all science stuff). I was even given a few "scholarship" options.. but, unfortunately, my family not knowing anything about how the school system works here in Canada, pushed me to "follow my passion". No one talked 'sense into me'... sure, I mean, ultimately it's my fault. I was arrogant, thought that going to a program with a better title would mean better options for my future and there was no one able to talk me down from my high-horse. At 18, we know everything.
But nope, I wanted that "specialty" program at a further school. It didn't come with a scholarship. My commute time went from what could have been 20 minutes, to over an hour at a much further "commuter school". Winter time was brutal..

Well, school started: I had issues with my parents and funding of said school. They went from telling me to follow my passion to, "oh where am I supposed to find money to fund your school". So I continued to work quite a few hours while in school, I did my best to have all my classes in 1 to 2 days so that I wouldn't need to commute to that shit school, and could work more hours on my off days.
I quickly ended up hating my life. Hating school and not really caring about it... I still went, but started skipping classes. Trying to get notes/details online and from other students. That didn't work out to well and I fell behind, started doing shit in school.
My first year was shit. Passed a few courses, failed a few, dropped a few, etc. But managed to not get kicked out.
Year 2 was much of the same. Shit, but worse. That year my dad got sick which weighed heavily on me. I ended up failing out year.. (there were other things going on as well, more family related but I will leave that out as anything more specific)

I took about 6 months to figure out what to do next and took a diploma course at a community college. (In Canada things are perceived like this: university is like the 'big deal' and college is like for the high school failures - think trades, 'hands on'.).
anyway, college was a joke for me academically. I finished a 3 year program in 2 years, with honors. I managed to get a job from a 'job fair' the school had with banks/local recruiters. I was pretty much the only guy to get hired immediately.
Because of how I fast tracked my program, I was finished in August, and started working in September.

I started out making $45k. I learned a lot about sales. I was selling financial services. I was a hot shot. things were going well for me and soon enough I was promoted to a senior sales guy. My salary went from $45, to $55.. I stayed in the role and hustled and my salary grew. Around the time I transitioned to the new role, I joined these forums. 2014.
The great thing about working in the bank and dealing with clients, you do see people from all walks of life and you get some ideas of things that work and things that dont. I would say that my specific role really opened my eyes to how businesses work.. and being in sales my self, I could see the parallels of what made a successful business owner vs. my own personal success.

I kept hustling, my pay went up (raises/revaluating the role bank wide, etc) and my salary continued to rise year after year. I topped out around $80k, my best year of sales/etc. But I hated my job. I hated the constant managers berating us for more sales. I kept trying to get another position, but by now, I'd been in the same role for to long. I feared I had been black-listed. I couldn't move. I was stuck. Management kept dangling twinkie bars on me though "but if u work really hard, we got an assistant manager job for you".

I was always a pessimist, but I always gave them a chance... so I bought into the whole "work hard to become an a$$-man"... That year I was told to interview for a$$-man position because our vice-president had suggested I interview.. But it was a joke. The didn't actually want to hire me, it seemed like they needed to weigh a pre-selected candidate against me. After they turned me down, the VP wanted a debrief with me personally.. where they told me not to be discouraged and to work hard/blah blah blah.... I knew it was a load of bullshit cause I had seen the shit they were promoting to a$$-Mans across the district... barely functional retards.. seriously... People that had no skills in leadership, were the ones being promoted... meawhile the good people - and yes I consider my self a good rounded person - was left to do the heavy lifting with zero reward.

So, I changed my tactic, and started applying externally. Luckily for me I got scooped up by another bank for a different role with an additional pay-bump. No sales to worry about.

Now, don't get me wrong. My current job is amazing. It's easy work for me, and I get paid about $100k to do it. I dodged a bullet with Covid as I am working from home.. While customer facing roles are still meeting with customers!
But, I'm bored to death.

You're asking, well, where do you suck? Well I turned 35 this year and this is not how I saw life unfolding. While I could do this job for the rest of my life (assuming we aren't axed at the next Shit quarterly earnings) I just feel like every day is the same, and my mind rots. I try to keep my brain active by always pursuing a new designation - thankfully the good thing about banks here is they generally pay for more education...
But I really suck because after 6 years of being on these forums I've accomplished nothing else significant with my life.. (yeah I got married, bought a home, etc) but I don't feel any accomplishment.
I can't scale my income. I can't work hard to make more. I can't get another job because working for a bank comes with rules... The stuff I'm good at like mortgages and real-estate, I can't sell because it's a conflict of interest/etc. I can't self promote my self... another conflict of interest.
I feel trapped.

That's a lot of "I can't"... yeah, I know. Which ads to why I suck..
And then I weigh out the cost-benefit analysis of doing things...
Build a website? learn to code? build a social media empire/help people with instagram?
I dabble... I like to dabble... I'll turn to this website every so often, get excited, try to do something.. Then stop..
I really liked the build a website.. I started doing it.. Figured out how to buy a domain/get hosting, start on word-press, get SSL,etc,etc.. but then I think about it... what will I sell? what trinkets will I sell? Whatever, throw it up there... but then my pessimist comes out...can I do this legally? whats the risk?
what if i sell something to someone and they get hurt/sick/etc. I get sued to make $10? I risk my wife assets along with my assets, to make $10?
I liked the idea of building websites for businesses too... but then I think about the same stuff as above....I'm still working my job and while I can finish my work quickly and have more free time during the day, what am II going to do? spent 30 hours to make $500? what's the real scale of building a website? what if I get real good... What's the timeline look like...and how much time do I need to get real good.. learning programming is a STEEP curve... like real programming..

but you have to understand these waht-if's come from years of working in business field.. I see small businesses failing all the time... they suck. they don't answer the phones when clients call. they make things overly complicated for their clients. they don't focus on the customer.
I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

Anyway, now you know why I shoot your post down or give a sarcastic post and that's why I also suck.
 

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ZF Lee

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April 6, 2014, I joined these forums. I wasn't much back then... and I don't think I'm much now.

Here's my story for you young-guns joining these forums.

I was always pushed into academics. This is the way. High school teachers, parents, aunts/uncles: "go to school" "become doctor, lawyer, accountant" etc. If you don't go to university, you will be a failure at life.
During high school I did alright for the most part. I never studied too hard, never really applied my self. I scored about average.
When it came time to apply to universities, I didn't get into the programs I wanted too. I did get into a few, but, didn't get those esteemed "science" programs that I was destined to go into.

So, I decided I would take a leap year to boost up my grades. I took a semester at a different high school, got my grades up across the board and that year got into all the programs I wanted too (all science stuff). I was even given a few "scholarship" options.. but, unfortunately, my family not knowing anything about how the school system works here in Canada, pushed me to "follow my passion". No one talked 'sense into me'... sure, I mean, ultimately it's my fault. I was arrogant, thought that going to a program with a better title would mean better options for my future and there was no one able to talk me down from my high-horse. At 18, we know everything.
But nope, I wanted that "specialty" program at a further school. It didn't come with a scholarship. My commute time went from what could have been 20 minutes, to over an hour at a much further "commuter school". Winter time was brutal..

Well, school started: I had issues with my parents and funding of said school. They went from telling me to follow my passion to, "oh where am I supposed to find money to fund your school". So I continued to work quite a few hours while in school, I did my best to have all my classes in 1 to 2 days so that I wouldn't need to commute to that shit school, and could work more hours on my off days.
I quickly ended up hating my life. Hating school and not really caring about it... I still went, but started skipping classes. Trying to get notes/details online and from other students. That didn't work out to well and I fell behind, started doing shit in school.
My first year was shit. Passed a few courses, failed a few, dropped a few, etc. But managed to not get kicked out.
Year 2 was much of the same. Shit, but worse. That year my dad got sick which weighed heavily on me. I ended up failing out year.. (there were other things going on as well, more family related but I will leave that out as anything more specific)

I took about 6 months to figure out what to do next and took a diploma course at a community college. (In Canada things are perceived like this: university is like the 'big deal' and college is like for the high school failures - think trades, 'hands on'.).
anyway, college was a joke for me academically. I finished a 3 year program in 2 years, with honors. I managed to get a job from a 'job fair' the school had with banks/local recruiters. I was pretty much the only guy to get hired immediately.
Because of how I fast tracked my program, I was finished in August, and started working in September.

I started out making $45k. I learned a lot about sales. I was selling financial services. I was a hot shot. things were going well for me and soon enough I was promoted to a senior sales guy. My salary went from $45, to $55.. I stayed in the role and hustled and my salary grew. Around the time I transitioned to the new role, I joined these forums. 2014.
The great thing about working in the bank and dealing with clients, you do see people from all walks of life and you get some ideas of things that work and things that dont. I would say that my specific role really opened my eyes to how businesses work.. and being in sales my self, I could see the parallels of what made a successful business owner vs. my own personal success.

I kept hustling, my pay went up (raises/revaluating the role bank wide, etc) and my salary continued to rise year after year. I topped out around $80k, my best year of sales/etc. But I hated my job. I hated the constant managers berating us for more sales. I kept trying to get another position, but by now, I'd been in the same role for to long. I feared I had been black-listed. I couldn't move. I was stuck. Management kept dangling twinkie bars on me though "but if u work really hard, we got an assistant manager job for you".

I was always a pessimist, but I always gave them a chance... so I bought into the whole "work hard to become an a$$-man"... That year I was told to interview for a$$-man position because our vice-president had suggested I interview.. But it was a joke. The didn't actually want to hire me, it seemed like they needed to weigh a pre-selected candidate against me. After they turned me down, the VP wanted a debrief with me personally.. where they told me not to be discouraged and to work hard/blah blah blah.... I knew it was a load of bullshit cause I had seen the shit they were promoting to a$$-Mans across the district... barely functional retards.. seriously... People that had no skills in leadership, were the ones being promoted... meawhile the good people - and yes I consider my self a good rounded person - was left to do the heavy lifting with zero reward.

So, I changed my tactic, and started applying externally. Luckily for me I got scooped up by another bank for a different role with an additional pay-bump. No sales to worry about.

Now, don't get me wrong. My current job is amazing. It's easy work for me, and I get paid about $100k to do it. I dodged a bullet with Covid as I am working from home.. While customer facing roles are still meeting with customers!
But, I'm bored to death.

You're asking, well, where do you suck? Well I turned 35 this year and this is not how I saw life unfolding. While I could do this job for the rest of my life (assuming we aren't axed at the next Shit quarterly earnings) I just feel like every day is the same, and my mind rots. I try to keep my brain active by always pursuing a new designation - thankfully the good thing about banks here is they generally pay for more education...
But I really suck because after 6 years of being on these forums I've accomplished nothing else significant with my life.. (yeah I got married, bought a home, etc) but I don't feel any accomplishment.
I can't scale my income. I can't work hard to make more. I can't get another job because working for a bank comes with rules... The stuff I'm good at like mortgages and real-estate, I can't sell because it's a conflict of interest/etc. I can't self promote my self... another conflict of interest.
I feel trapped.

That's a lot of "I can't"... yeah, I know. Which ads to why I suck..
And then I weigh out the cost-benefit analysis of doing things...
Build a website? learn to code? build a social media empire/help people with instagram?
I dabble... I like to dabble... I'll turn to this website every so often, get excited, try to do something.. Then stop..
I really liked the build a website.. I started doing it.. Figured out how to buy a domain/get hosting, start on word-press, get SSL,etc,etc.. but then I think about it... what will I sell? what trinkets will I sell? Whatever, throw it up there... but then my pessimist comes out...can I do this legally? whats the risk?
what if i sell something to someone and they get hurt/sick/etc. I get sued to make $10? I risk my wife assets along with my assets, to make $10?
I liked the idea of building websites for businesses too... but then I think about the same stuff as above....I'm still working my job and while I can finish my work quickly and have more free time during the day, what am II going to do? spent 30 hours to make $500? what's the real scale of building a website? what if I get real good... What's the timeline look like...and how much time do I need to get real good.. learning programming is a STEEP curve... like real programming..

but you have to understand these waht-if's come from years of working in business field.. I see small businesses failing all the time... they suck. they don't answer the phones when clients call. they make things overly complicated for their clients. they don't focus on the customer.
I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

Anyway, now you know why I shoot your post down or give a sarcastic post and that's why I also suck.
Woah...long story, but I can agree a lot with the tone and the message behind it.
Really appreciate your sharing!

I guess there'll always be something we suck at haha.
Even at the things we think we are good at.

The best we can do is to keep asking ourselves, 'Is there a BETTER way to do this?' or 'Is there another story behind it that no one's telling?'

An example of the latter would be a stock I bought recently.
Manufacturing company for smartphone chips.
Bought it based on the story that it had several orders on the go.

But the price just stayed stiff for a long while, and when I took a look at the ratios on the financial statements, I noticed that the efficiency ratios were pretty slow compared to the industry benchmarks. Cashflow figures and ratios were also missing from Yahoo, which was unusual, considered the firm had been public for a few years.

Then I checked Yahoo's record on insider trades and spotted an unusual amount of selling by the directors that looked too high for regular profit-taking.

I'll hold for a bit and see, but that shows there's a lot more to learning skills and experiences than meets the eye.
 

Envision

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Lots of negativity coming from your post. Woe is me, I suck, I cant do it, why should I...

With your mentality you've already lost and you seem to be stewing in it.

Only you can decide how to respond to life and how to view it.

The nice thing is you're the one in control. Whether you suck or not.
 

Jasper S

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@daivey You have a fascinating story to say the least. Thank you for sharing!

It sounds like you enjoy, or are at least interested in building websites. Is there anything in your current role a website could help you with? Build it! For example, my first website is a simple calculator I made to help me with a very particular problem I had at work. Your first website doesn't have to be crazy fancy and it will probably take a while to develop. However, at least the way I looked at it is even though it will take me a long time to create that first website, I will learn a ton and it will make the second website come together that much quicker.

As for the analysis paralysis I had a bit of that myself. Before launching anything I felt like any and all liability would be on me. I did research to figure out how to mitigate and limit any risks I could think of. The hardest part mentally was pushing the code to the server because for me that was the first time I had ever sent anything I created out into the market. It was a bit scary, but definitely worth it!
 

daivey

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@daivey You have a fascinating story to say the least. Thank you for sharing!

It sounds like you enjoy, or are at least interested in building websites. Is there anything in your current role a website could help you with? Build it! For example, my first website is a simple calculator I made to help me with a very particular problem I had at work. Your first website doesn't have to be crazy fancy and it will probably take a while to develop. However, at least the way I looked at it is even though it will take me a long time to create that first website, I will learn a ton and it will make the second website come together that much quicker.

As for the analysis paralysis I had a bit of that myself. Before launching anything I felt like any and all liability would be on me. I did research to figure out how to mitigate and limit any risks I could think of. The hardest part mentally was pushing the code to the server because for me that was the first time I had ever sent anything I created out into the market. It was a bit scary, but definitely worth it!

yeah I've always been interested in the tech side of things for sure. and that's exactly it... over analyzing it..

Lots of negativity coming from your post. Woe is me, I suck, I cant do it, why should I...

With your mentality you've already lost and you seem to be stewing in it.

Only you can decide how to respond to life and how to view it.

The nice thing is you're the one in control. Whether you suck or not.
lol what gave away my negativity?
 

MJ DeMarco

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You don't suck, you're just stuck in what everyone else is stuck in. Your vice is mediocre comfort, enough to keep the mediocre existence going, but not bad enough to do anything about it.

The only way out of that is to find a greater purpose, a meaning, something that means more than the mediocre comfort. Good luck.
 

mon_fi

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Hey,

Thx for sharing, I could recognize myself in a lot of what you wrote. I'll tell you what, you are way too comfy. You are not doing anything because the effort to do something is stronger than the pain of not doing it. You are like the cat that is complaining it is sitting on a nail, but that is too "lazy" to move. You need a bit of "motivation", a "life or death situation" since it seems these are the only ones during which you can perform. So here's my suggestion.

1. Quit your job.
2. Donate all your belongings and net worth.
3. Keep enough money to live anywhere in the world for a year, renting a studio (20 000 USD ought to be more than enough).
4. Start hustling cuz if you don't, you'll be sleeping in the street in a year.


Alternatively, you can quit your job and go to Latin America to volunteer. Or you can quit your job, travel a little, then build an online business on a beach in Thailand. Or you can do the exact same job you do now in an Eastern European country, where you make 1200 USD before taxes, per month, if you are lucky. Trust me, working for almost nothing motivates you to make money on your own.

I think you got the idea ;)

Good luck,


M.
 

Kevin88660

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April 6, 2014, I joined these forums. I wasn't much back then... and I don't think I'm much now.

Here's my story for you young-guns joining these forums.

I was always pushed into academics. This is the way. High school teachers, parents, aunts/uncles: "go to school" "become doctor, lawyer, accountant" etc. If you don't go to university, you will be a failure at life.
During high school I did alright for the most part. I never studied too hard, never really applied my self. I scored about average.
When it came time to apply to universities, I didn't get into the programs I wanted too. I did get into a few, but, didn't get those esteemed "science" programs that I was destined to go into.

So, I decided I would take a leap year to boost up my grades. I took a semester at a different high school, got my grades up across the board and that year got into all the programs I wanted too (all science stuff). I was even given a few "scholarship" options.. but, unfortunately, my family not knowing anything about how the school system works here in Canada, pushed me to "follow my passion". No one talked 'sense into me'... sure, I mean, ultimately it's my fault. I was arrogant, thought that going to a program with a better title would mean better options for my future and there was no one able to talk me down from my high-horse. At 18, we know everything.
But nope, I wanted that "specialty" program at a further school. It didn't come with a scholarship. My commute time went from what could have been 20 minutes, to over an hour at a much further "commuter school". Winter time was brutal..

Well, school started: I had issues with my parents and funding of said school. They went from telling me to follow my passion to, "oh where am I supposed to find money to fund your school". So I continued to work quite a few hours while in school, I did my best to have all my classes in 1 to 2 days so that I wouldn't need to commute to that shit school, and could work more hours on my off days.
I quickly ended up hating my life. Hating school and not really caring about it... I still went, but started skipping classes. Trying to get notes/details online and from other students. That didn't work out to well and I fell behind, started doing shit in school.
My first year was shit. Passed a few courses, failed a few, dropped a few, etc. But managed to not get kicked out.
Year 2 was much of the same. Shit, but worse. That year my dad got sick which weighed heavily on me. I ended up failing out year.. (there were other things going on as well, more family related but I will leave that out as anything more specific)

I took about 6 months to figure out what to do next and took a diploma course at a community college. (In Canada things are perceived like this: university is like the 'big deal' and college is like for the high school failures - think trades, 'hands on'.).
anyway, college was a joke for me academically. I finished a 3 year program in 2 years, with honors. I managed to get a job from a 'job fair' the school had with banks/local recruiters. I was pretty much the only guy to get hired immediately.
Because of how I fast tracked my program, I was finished in August, and started working in September.

I started out making $45k. I learned a lot about sales. I was selling financial services. I was a hot shot. things were going well for me and soon enough I was promoted to a senior sales guy. My salary went from $45, to $55.. I stayed in the role and hustled and my salary grew. Around the time I transitioned to the new role, I joined these forums. 2014.
The great thing about working in the bank and dealing with clients, you do see people from all walks of life and you get some ideas of things that work and things that dont. I would say that my specific role really opened my eyes to how businesses work.. and being in sales my self, I could see the parallels of what made a successful business owner vs. my own personal success.

I kept hustling, my pay went up (raises/revaluating the role bank wide, etc) and my salary continued to rise year after year. I topped out around $80k, my best year of sales/etc. But I hated my job. I hated the constant managers berating us for more sales. I kept trying to get another position, but by now, I'd been in the same role for to long. I feared I had been black-listed. I couldn't move. I was stuck. Management kept dangling twinkie bars on me though "but if u work really hard, we got an assistant manager job for you".

I was always a pessimist, but I always gave them a chance... so I bought into the whole "work hard to become an a$$-man"... That year I was told to interview for a$$-man position because our vice-president had suggested I interview.. But it was a joke. The didn't actually want to hire me, it seemed like they needed to weigh a pre-selected candidate against me. After they turned me down, the VP wanted a debrief with me personally.. where they told me not to be discouraged and to work hard/blah blah blah.... I knew it was a load of bullshit cause I had seen the shit they were promoting to a$$-Mans across the district... barely functional retards.. seriously... People that had no skills in leadership, were the ones being promoted... meawhile the good people - and yes I consider my self a good rounded person - was left to do the heavy lifting with zero reward.

So, I changed my tactic, and started applying externally. Luckily for me I got scooped up by another bank for a different role with an additional pay-bump. No sales to worry about.

Now, don't get me wrong. My current job is amazing. It's easy work for me, and I get paid about $100k to do it. I dodged a bullet with Covid as I am working from home.. While customer facing roles are still meeting with customers!
But, I'm bored to death.

You're asking, well, where do you suck? Well I turned 35 this year and this is not how I saw life unfolding. While I could do this job for the rest of my life (assuming we aren't axed at the next Shit quarterly earnings) I just feel like every day is the same, and my mind rots. I try to keep my brain active by always pursuing a new designation - thankfully the good thing about banks here is they generally pay for more education...
But I really suck because after 6 years of being on these forums I've accomplished nothing else significant with my life.. (yeah I got married, bought a home, etc) but I don't feel any accomplishment.
I can't scale my income. I can't work hard to make more. I can't get another job because working for a bank comes with rules... The stuff I'm good at like mortgages and real-estate, I can't sell because it's a conflict of interest/etc. I can't self promote my self... another conflict of interest.
I feel trapped.

That's a lot of "I can't"... yeah, I know. Which ads to why I suck..
And then I weigh out the cost-benefit analysis of doing things...
Build a website? learn to code? build a social media empire/help people with instagram?
I dabble... I like to dabble... I'll turn to this website every so often, get excited, try to do something.. Then stop..
I really liked the build a website.. I started doing it.. Figured out how to buy a domain/get hosting, start on word-press, get SSL,etc,etc.. but then I think about it... what will I sell? what trinkets will I sell? Whatever, throw it up there... but then my pessimist comes out...can I do this legally? whats the risk?
what if i sell something to someone and they get hurt/sick/etc. I get sued to make $10? I risk my wife assets along with my assets, to make $10?
I liked the idea of building websites for businesses too... but then I think about the same stuff as above....I'm still working my job and while I can finish my work quickly and have more free time during the day, what am II going to do? spent 30 hours to make $500? what's the real scale of building a website? what if I get real good... What's the timeline look like...and how much time do I need to get real good.. learning programming is a STEEP curve... like real programming..

but you have to understand these waht-if's come from years of working in business field.. I see small businesses failing all the time... they suck. they don't answer the phones when clients call. they make things overly complicated for their clients. they don't focus on the customer.
I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

Anyway, now you know why I shoot your post down or give a sarcastic post and that's why I also suck.
I moved from selling in a bank, to a self-employed broker selling financial products. I am based in Singapore.

Since I am not en employee there is a lot of more personal freedom.

One thing I am currently experimenting is to create a non-face showing recruitment channel on social media for the industry (financial service). Insurance companies, brokers and other retail distributors pay thousands of dollar to recruit a single self-employed salesperson. If it is successful then the channel could be a business asset sold to them In the future.
 

Kevin88660

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I moved from selling in a bank, to a self-employed broker selling financial products. I am based in Singapore.

Since I am not en employee there is a lot of more personal freedom.

One thing I am currently experimenting is to create a non-face showing recruitment channel on social media for the industry (financial service). Insurance companies, brokers and other retail distributors pay thousands of dollar to recruit a single self-employed salesperson. If it is successful then the channel could be a business asset sold to them In the future.
There are a lot of interesting things going on right now that are somewhat related to your experience, since we share similar industry experience.

Data Analytics- a lot of financial services firms are trying to use that to predict the likelihood of coming repeat sales from their existing client base. As of now I heard that the result is horrible. That is not stopping them from throwing money at “external IT consultants”. The problem is I guess they do not have people who understand the business, marketing and sales at a deeper level to work together. Sales cycles and consumer behavior have changed these days with mobile phone and instant messaging.

Cryptocurrency- A lot of financial innovation using smart contracts are taking place. It has its own ecosystem of business opportunities.
 

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The-J

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Like MJ said, you're comfortable. But you're unhappy with it.

If my dad was in your position when he was 35 he would feel like a success. He wasn't, not even close, yet he felt like a success. His raison d'etre was to provide for his family, and his job did just that. He was happy where he was.

And here you are... unhappy. You're successful on paper, 35 making 6 figures a year, and you start your thread title with "I suck".

Why the hell are you so unhappy? Answer that question and you'll be one step closer to figuring out WHY you should change.

Also: be here now!

Also also, (re) read Simon Sinek's "Start with Why". Gave me a lot of clarity about my indecision and laziness.
 

socaldude

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It sounds like you suffer from a shitty self-image.

Let’s examine the word self-image. An Image is a 2 Dimensional construct. Yet the human body is a 3 Dimensional object. See what’s wrong here. You are not taking responsibility for your own self. Your letting the outside world determine your perceptions. You are passive.

Just to be quick and brief. You wanna leverage the psychological mechanics of addiction in your favor. Instead of being addicted to external things like food, drugs, sex, alcohol, rumination be addicted to understanding and awareness. It places the power back in your hands. Then your 3D self can impact your 2D self-image. Then instead of letting the outside world determine your self-image you do so yourself through independent thinking.

One of my favorite books is Flatland. It’s a fiction book where everyone is stuck in 2D yet somehow someone manages to discover 3D.

But yeah pretty much been there done that. Graduated college in 2014 and pretty much lost. Take out the trash and take control of yourself.
 
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fastlaner_1992

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April 6, 2014, I joined these forums. I wasn't much back then... and I don't think I'm much now.

Here's my story for you young-guns joining these forums.

I was always pushed into academics. This is the way. High school teachers, parents, aunts/uncles: "go to school" "become doctor, lawyer, accountant" etc. If you don't go to university, you will be a failure at life.
During high school I did alright for the most part. I never studied too hard, never really applied my self. I scored about average.
When it came time to apply to universities, I didn't get into the programs I wanted too. I did get into a few, but, didn't get those esteemed "science" programs that I was destined to go into.

So, I decided I would take a leap year to boost up my grades. I took a semester at a different high school, got my grades up across the board and that year got into all the programs I wanted too (all science stuff). I was even given a few "scholarship" options.. but, unfortunately, my family not knowing anything about how the school system works here in Canada, pushed me to "follow my passion". No one talked 'sense into me'... sure, I mean, ultimately it's my fault. I was arrogant, thought that going to a program with a better title would mean better options for my future and there was no one able to talk me down from my high-horse. At 18, we know everything.
But nope, I wanted that "specialty" program at a further school. It didn't come with a scholarship. My commute time went from what could have been 20 minutes, to over an hour at a much further "commuter school". Winter time was brutal..

Well, school started: I had issues with my parents and funding of said school. They went from telling me to follow my passion to, "oh where am I supposed to find money to fund your school". So I continued to work quite a few hours while in school, I did my best to have all my classes in 1 to 2 days so that I wouldn't need to commute to that shit school, and could work more hours on my off days.
I quickly ended up hating my life. Hating school and not really caring about it... I still went, but started skipping classes. Trying to get notes/details online and from other students. That didn't work out to well and I fell behind, started doing shit in school.
My first year was shit. Passed a few courses, failed a few, dropped a few, etc. But managed to not get kicked out.
Year 2 was much of the same. Shit, but worse. That year my dad got sick which weighed heavily on me. I ended up failing out year.. (there were other things going on as well, more family related but I will leave that out as anything more specific)

I took about 6 months to figure out what to do next and took a diploma course at a community college. (In Canada things are perceived like this: university is like the 'big deal' and college is like for the high school failures - think trades, 'hands on'.).
anyway, college was a joke for me academically. I finished a 3 year program in 2 years, with honors. I managed to get a job from a 'job fair' the school had with banks/local recruiters. I was pretty much the only guy to get hired immediately.
Because of how I fast tracked my program, I was finished in August, and started working in September.

I started out making $45k. I learned a lot about sales. I was selling financial services. I was a hot shot. things were going well for me and soon enough I was promoted to a senior sales guy. My salary went from $45, to $55.. I stayed in the role and hustled and my salary grew. Around the time I transitioned to the new role, I joined these forums. 2014.
The great thing about working in the bank and dealing with clients, you do see people from all walks of life and you get some ideas of things that work and things that dont. I would say that my specific role really opened my eyes to how businesses work.. and being in sales my self, I could see the parallels of what made a successful business owner vs. my own personal success.

I kept hustling, my pay went up (raises/revaluating the role bank wide, etc) and my salary continued to rise year after year. I topped out around $80k, my best year of sales/etc. But I hated my job. I hated the constant managers berating us for more sales. I kept trying to get another position, but by now, I'd been in the same role for to long. I feared I had been black-listed. I couldn't move. I was stuck. Management kept dangling twinkie bars on me though "but if u work really hard, we got an assistant manager job for you".

I was always a pessimist, but I always gave them a chance... so I bought into the whole "work hard to become an a$$-man"... That year I was told to interview for a$$-man position because our vice-president had suggested I interview.. But it was a joke. The didn't actually want to hire me, it seemed like they needed to weigh a pre-selected candidate against me. After they turned me down, the VP wanted a debrief with me personally.. where they told me not to be discouraged and to work hard/blah blah blah.... I knew it was a load of bullshit cause I had seen the shit they were promoting to a$$-Mans across the district... barely functional retards.. seriously... People that had no skills in leadership, were the ones being promoted... meawhile the good people - and yes I consider my self a good rounded person - was left to do the heavy lifting with zero reward.

So, I changed my tactic, and started applying externally. Luckily for me I got scooped up by another bank for a different role with an additional pay-bump. No sales to worry about.

Now, don't get me wrong. My current job is amazing. It's easy work for me, and I get paid about $100k to do it. I dodged a bullet with Covid as I am working from home.. While customer facing roles are still meeting with customers!
But, I'm bored to death.

You're asking, well, where do you suck? Well I turned 35 this year and this is not how I saw life unfolding. While I could do this job for the rest of my life (assuming we aren't axed at the next Shit quarterly earnings) I just feel like every day is the same, and my mind rots. I try to keep my brain active by always pursuing a new designation - thankfully the good thing about banks here is they generally pay for more education...
But I really suck because after 6 years of being on these forums I've accomplished nothing else significant with my life.. (yeah I got married, bought a home, etc) but I don't feel any accomplishment.
I can't scale my income. I can't work hard to make more. I can't get another job because working for a bank comes with rules... The stuff I'm good at like mortgages and real-estate, I can't sell because it's a conflict of interest/etc. I can't self promote my self... another conflict of interest.
I feel trapped.

That's a lot of "I can't"... yeah, I know. Which ads to why I suck..
And then I weigh out the cost-benefit analysis of doing things...
Build a website? learn to code? build a social media empire/help people with instagram?
I dabble... I like to dabble... I'll turn to this website every so often, get excited, try to do something.. Then stop..
I really liked the build a website.. I started doing it.. Figured out how to buy a domain/get hosting, start on word-press, get SSL,etc,etc.. but then I think about it... what will I sell? what trinkets will I sell? Whatever, throw it up there... but then my pessimist comes out...can I do this legally? whats the risk?
what if i sell something to someone and they get hurt/sick/etc. I get sued to make $10? I risk my wife assets along with my assets, to make $10?
I liked the idea of building websites for businesses too... but then I think about the same stuff as above....I'm still working my job and while I can finish my work quickly and have more free time during the day, what am II going to do? spent 30 hours to make $500? what's the real scale of building a website? what if I get real good... What's the timeline look like...and how much time do I need to get real good.. learning programming is a STEEP curve... like real programming..

but you have to understand these waht-if's come from years of working in business field.. I see small businesses failing all the time... they suck. they don't answer the phones when clients call. they make things overly complicated for their clients. they don't focus on the customer.
I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

Anyway, now you know why I shoot your post down or give a sarcastic post and that's why I also suck.

You sound like you need to express yourself.

Actionable things you can do to get yourself out of a rut.

1. Start therapy
2. Do more inner work
a. Meditation
b. Challenging and changing beliefs
c. Hypnosis
d. Listen to Ed Mylett
3. Re-read MJ's books

And most of all its time to love and respect yourself, I know when you don't love or respect aspects of yourself how difficult it can be but what are you going to become if you stay in this energy for another 5, 10, 20 years?

Steering wheel = Your choice

You have the power to choose, start with smaller choices and work up to the big ones.

Set goals and measure them. But start with writing smaller goals down.

Put your vision for your future in your world. Set reminders on your phone. The goal is to saturate your mind with your goals.

Easy said than done but worth it.

Peace and keep pushing to greater heights!

And well done btw for all you've accomplished so far.
 

MJ DeMarco

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Action expresses priorities.
 

ZF Lee

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Fear not, he's a long way until your crown is in danger.
PS you get paid by the word on Upwork don't you?
I have done article writing projects on Upwork, but I typically provide copywriting services.

For copywriting though (and for some article writing), it’s actually LESS of word-smithing and more on knowing your markets.

You can use all the hooks and persuasion tricks in the book, but if you don’t start with the right emotions and problems that the prospect is concerned about, they lose steam.

So, in reality, I get paid for getting my research right, and nailing the right pain-points that lead folks to go for the buy or click.
 

JordanK

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Have you thought about actually buying Real Estate and becoming an investor. You could easily leverage your income and start to build a small empire. Eventually you could quit the bank job when property income exceeds your salary. I think you lack control. You dont like other people being in charge of your destiny and telling you what to do. With RE investing you don’t have to make a dramatic jump from your job straight away. It also is an area that you probably have a little bit of experience with from the finance side. Its a real numbers game (on top of the people/networking side too).
 

BizyDad

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Former banker and still risk averse person here, I can relate.

Congratulations on figuring out how to make it in the banking game. I'm surprised you haven't started searching for another job with an outside firm, because just about every jump includes a salary raise.

In a couple years you could be making $150k. And depending on how frugally you live, you should be able to sock away a good pile of cash.

You going to need it.

Because someday you're going to quit your job. And you've got a wife to answer to. But someday you're going to hit your breaking point. You're going to have to do something else.

And based on your current attitude, you're not going to create a side hustle. You're just not that type.

So your only way out is to create a huge pile of cash, then buy a business and run that.

But until then, be proud of where you got to. I know tons of bankers that never figure out how to make it. Tons were stuck. If I were you, I'd be thankful they didn't give you that promotion. You'd be making less now. And you feel more loyal to the company. In the long run that would have hurt you.

Set a goal to save up a bunch of money in two years. Start looking for businesses to buy. When talking to your potential clients, ask them what they think about their exit strategy. Talk to them about how they plan on selling their business. Never ever ever mention that you want to buy it, just act like you are there interested banker and you're talking about their long-term vision for their business.

But these interviews will help you when it comes to actually buying a business, because you'll know how the person on the other side of the transaction thinks.

If you don't like this idea, then do what the successful people on this forum do:

Step 1: find a need
Step 2: fill it
Step 3: repeat

If there's a bona fide need, and you're really good at filling it, it isn't risky at all.

And never forget the soon-to-be famous quote:

Whether you think you suck, or whether you don't, you're right.
 

WJK

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April 6, 2014, I joined these forums. I wasn't much back then... and I don't think I'm much now.

Here's my story for you young-guns joining these forums.

I was always pushed into academics. This is the way. High school teachers, parents, aunts/uncles: "go to school" "become doctor, lawyer, accountant" etc. If you don't go to university, you will be a failure at life.
During high school I did alright for the most part. I never studied too hard, never really applied my self. I scored about average.
When it came time to apply to universities, I didn't get into the programs I wanted too. I did get into a few, but, didn't get those esteemed "science" programs that I was destined to go into.

So, I decided I would take a leap year to boost up my grades. I took a semester at a different high school, got my grades up across the board and that year got into all the programs I wanted too (all science stuff). I was even given a few "scholarship" options.. but, unfortunately, my family not knowing anything about how the school system works here in Canada, pushed me to "follow my passion". No one talked 'sense into me'... sure, I mean, ultimately it's my fault. I was arrogant, thought that going to a program with a better title would mean better options for my future and there was no one able to talk me down from my high-horse. At 18, we know everything.
But nope, I wanted that "specialty" program at a further school. It didn't come with a scholarship. My commute time went from what could have been 20 minutes, to over an hour at a much further "commuter school". Winter time was brutal..

Well, school started: I had issues with my parents and funding of said school. They went from telling me to follow my passion to, "oh where am I supposed to find money to fund your school". So I continued to work quite a few hours while in school, I did my best to have all my classes in 1 to 2 days so that I wouldn't need to commute to that shit school, and could work more hours on my off days.
I quickly ended up hating my life. Hating school and not really caring about it... I still went, but started skipping classes. Trying to get notes/details online and from other students. That didn't work out to well and I fell behind, started doing shit in school.
My first year was shit. Passed a few courses, failed a few, dropped a few, etc. But managed to not get kicked out.
Year 2 was much of the same. Shit, but worse. That year my dad got sick which weighed heavily on me. I ended up failing out year.. (there were other things going on as well, more family related but I will leave that out as anything more specific)

I took about 6 months to figure out what to do next and took a diploma course at a community college. (In Canada things are perceived like this: university is like the 'big deal' and college is like for the high school failures - think trades, 'hands on'.).
anyway, college was a joke for me academically. I finished a 3 year program in 2 years, with honors. I managed to get a job from a 'job fair' the school had with banks/local recruiters. I was pretty much the only guy to get hired immediately.
Because of how I fast tracked my program, I was finished in August, and started working in September.

I started out making $45k. I learned a lot about sales. I was selling financial services. I was a hot shot. things were going well for me and soon enough I was promoted to a senior sales guy. My salary went from $45, to $55.. I stayed in the role and hustled and my salary grew. Around the time I transitioned to the new role, I joined these forums. 2014.
The great thing about working in the bank and dealing with clients, you do see people from all walks of life and you get some ideas of things that work and things that dont. I would say that my specific role really opened my eyes to how businesses work.. and being in sales my self, I could see the parallels of what made a successful business owner vs. my own personal success.

I kept hustling, my pay went up (raises/revaluating the role bank wide, etc) and my salary continued to rise year after year. I topped out around $80k, my best year of sales/etc. But I hated my job. I hated the constant managers berating us for more sales. I kept trying to get another position, but by now, I'd been in the same role for to long. I feared I had been black-listed. I couldn't move. I was stuck. Management kept dangling twinkie bars on me though "but if u work really hard, we got an assistant manager job for you".

I was always a pessimist, but I always gave them a chance... so I bought into the whole "work hard to become an a$$-man"... That year I was told to interview for a$$-man position because our vice-president had suggested I interview.. But it was a joke. The didn't actually want to hire me, it seemed like they needed to weigh a pre-selected candidate against me. After they turned me down, the VP wanted a debrief with me personally.. where they told me not to be discouraged and to work hard/blah blah blah.... I knew it was a load of bullshit cause I had seen the shit they were promoting to a$$-Mans across the district... barely functional retards.. seriously... People that had no skills in leadership, were the ones being promoted... meawhile the good people - and yes I consider my self a good rounded person - was left to do the heavy lifting with zero reward.

So, I changed my tactic, and started applying externally. Luckily for me I got scooped up by another bank for a different role with an additional pay-bump. No sales to worry about.

Now, don't get me wrong. My current job is amazing. It's easy work for me, and I get paid about $100k to do it. I dodged a bullet with Covid as I am working from home.. While customer facing roles are still meeting with customers!
But, I'm bored to death.

You're asking, well, where do you suck? Well I turned 35 this year and this is not how I saw life unfolding. While I could do this job for the rest of my life (assuming we aren't axed at the next Shit quarterly earnings) I just feel like every day is the same, and my mind rots. I try to keep my brain active by always pursuing a new designation - thankfully the good thing about banks here is they generally pay for more education...
But I really suck because after 6 years of being on these forums I've accomplished nothing else significant with my life.. (yeah I got married, bought a home, etc) but I don't feel any accomplishment.
I can't scale my income. I can't work hard to make more. I can't get another job because working for a bank comes with rules... The stuff I'm good at like mortgages and real-estate, I can't sell because it's a conflict of interest/etc. I can't self promote my self... another conflict of interest.
I feel trapped.

That's a lot of "I can't"... yeah, I know. Which ads to why I suck..
And then I weigh out the cost-benefit analysis of doing things...
Build a website? learn to code? build a social media empire/help people with instagram?
I dabble... I like to dabble... I'll turn to this website every so often, get excited, try to do something.. Then stop..
I really liked the build a website.. I started doing it.. Figured out how to buy a domain/get hosting, start on word-press, get SSL,etc,etc.. but then I think about it... what will I sell? what trinkets will I sell? Whatever, throw it up there... but then my pessimist comes out...can I do this legally? whats the risk?
what if i sell something to someone and they get hurt/sick/etc. I get sued to make $10? I risk my wife assets along with my assets, to make $10?
I liked the idea of building websites for businesses too... but then I think about the same stuff as above....I'm still working my job and while I can finish my work quickly and have more free time during the day, what am II going to do? spent 30 hours to make $500? what's the real scale of building a website? what if I get real good... What's the timeline look like...and how much time do I need to get real good.. learning programming is a STEEP curve... like real programming..

but you have to understand these waht-if's come from years of working in business field.. I see small businesses failing all the time... they suck. they don't answer the phones when clients call. they make things overly complicated for their clients. they don't focus on the customer.
I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

Anyway, now you know why I shoot your post down or give a sarcastic post and that's why I also suck.
So, you're bored. And you're afraid that there isn't more for you out there in that big bad world. You have a high intellect -- maybe sounds like you tend to be ADD or have habits along those lines. Things come easy to you IF you chose to put your shoulder into it. When you conquer that challenge -- you are done and you throw it aside. You totally lose interest in that thing that had been so important to you. Now you are looking for the "NEXT" part of your life. It sounds like you need a side gig to occupy your mind. But, you have too many talents and possibilities to make that one next choice. You also understand enough about business and selling that you know the risks. Good for you.

You feel alone. Naught! Been there, done that. Got that T-shirt and the entry-fee ticket stub. This is the life pattern of a lot of us. Welcome to the club. I'm 66 years old and I'm still trying to figure out what I wanna be when grow up. And I've been a lot of things over the years. I reshuffle things every once in while when I'm seeking out a new interest. Each time, the subjects tend to be different, but the struggle is the same.

So, I take limited risks away from my core business -- which feeds us -- so that core business is my sacred cow. My side venture are just that -- limited to my extra time and resources. Each side risk must have a HUGE upside and the odds must be in my favor. I always assume I am going to lose my "nut" that I have on the table. The money, time, and effort are probably going to be a dead loss. I accept that as the price of admission to play the game. But, when I win on one of these ventures, investments, or side gigs, I really win. Yes, those wins are rare, but oh, do they feel good. I always have my ear to the ground looking for next one -- saving for the next one -- chasing down that one more. I use my selling skills to interview everyone around me to find that next one. I used my business experience to weigh its possibilities. It must be small enough to do within my current schedule and my budget. It must be big enough to interest me. I have an old friend for the last 40+ years who says I spin straw into gold. I hope so and I sure try hard. Have you thought about doing something similar?
 

S.Y.

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Change your stories. Change the ones you are telling yourself, change the ones you are telling about life, and craft meaningful ones.

Find your purpose. @eliquid has a very good thread on it. Start there.

Lead. Yourself and others. Act like a leader.

I found myself in Stoicism. You can give it a try. Here are few quotes I hope help :

"waste no time arguing what a good man should be. Be one". Be the one you want to be. Act like you ideal self. Everyday.

"man is affected not by events bu the view he takes of them"

"begin at once to live. And count each separate day as separate life"
 

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amp0193

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I've met thousands of clients that come in with their big-dicks swinging like they are king shit with this all-mighty business plan and flopppppp. And now their home is refinanced to the hilt carrying this shit debt that they sacrificed for.

Start hanging out with successful people and it'll change your mindset.

Not every business fails.

And of those that do, most give up way too soon.


When you would do anything to keep your business from failing... that's how you know you're onto something.

Otherwise... you're just dabbling. As you said.
 

Lyinx

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at some point, you hang out with too many successful people, and think you can never fail... so there's another side to the story :)
 

LightHouse

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I hope this post and the responses you got was all the sorrow, attention, and significance you needed in life to die happy.

If it wasn't, call me when you must to do something different. Hopefully that isnt 30 years from now when no one can help you, not even yourself.

until then... keep on suckin my dude :p
 

Johnny boy

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It's simple, you are risk-averse and not a rebellious person or a very unique thinker.

Just save your money, build a real estate portfolio, continue to live below your means, and spend your free time doing activities that you enjoy doing. You'll make a few mil and won't have to work your job. Nothing crazy but much better than doing nothing.

If you had a real mission or a greater purpose that you wanted to pursue, you would be much much less worried about any perceived risk. To me, I don't care about "losing it all". I have nothing to lose because anything other than my ultimate goal is losing it all anyways.

Also, lots of losers start businesses and fail. Just don't be a loser. You shouldn't live your life thinking you will always receive the median expected results. You are 1 person. If 1 person did it then that's all you need to know. The person who does anything "average" will always have a disappointing life. There's people making millions cutting grass
 

James Klymus

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over thinking becomes my crux... im damaged goods from years of seeing people fail/seeing what it takes to succeed/etc...

I think this sums it up. You go deep and analyze all the possibilities, mostly the negative ones I would assume. What if I fail, what if people judge me, what if I don't like doing this and i'm stuck, what if I do something my wife doesn't like and we break up and then i'm lonely, what if i can't pay my bills and I lose the house etc...

It's not easy for most people to be brave, that's why most people aren't. When you have a warm bed, food, good clothes, a nice car, income coming in predictably, why would you risk that?

Well, you'd risk that for fulfillment. Nobody is fulfilled by working in a cubicle, for some big bank, being a cog in the corporate system.

I say all this because I've felt like you before. You're comfortable but not fulfilled. You have to ask your self "Am I okay ending up broke and alone, worst case, to chase after my dreams?"

It's not feel good self help, but it's the truth you need to hear.

It's okay if you say no, Just understand you may never truly reach your potential and be fulfilled. And personally, I'm more scared of living a mediocre life doing something I hate, than I am failing and having to live on a couch at mom and dads.

Also, I would read this: http://richardwiseman.com/resources/The_Luck_Factor.pdf

Maybe you'll get some value out of it, maybe you won't, I don't know. I did though, so I'll share it with you.
 

djcoax

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To be honest, your opening post really annoyed me. All that negativity, risk averseness, and especially your lack of self-esteem.

It annoys me because this was me 15 years ago. I was raised in a household where negativity was the norm. It's just like that - my dad especially looks at life as a half-empty glass and this mindset got ingrained in me just like the script was carved deep into my being.

It took experiencing the horrors of the slow lane to wake up and - I'm now 44 - I've been slowly and gradually working on myself to release this negativity: meditation, coaches, therapists, you name it. At the same time, I started several side businesses and they all failed in some way or form, because I was not committed to escaping the Slowlane and because I liked to sit in my comfort zone. And .. especially because of this lack of self-esteem.

My recent business IS going very well and I like to think part of the success is the result of the work I did on myself.

Try to dig deep and find out where this negative mindset comes from. Then tackle it.

I'm going to tell you EXACTLY what I would tell my younger self.

Quit f*cking bitching about how bad your life is and either shut up or start taking action. Decide exactly what you want and take one step in that direction every day. No action faking, no lying to yourself. Go get what you want because you DESERVE it and you are WORTH it. More importantly, disconnect your self-worth from any outcome. Businesses fail sometimes through simple bad luck. Don't care what other people think. Be nice to yourself, love yourself. Focus on creating value for others and you'll be alright.

Make it a habit to get out of your comfort zone.

The cave you are afraid to enter holds the treasure you seek.
 

RazorCut

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By many mainstream markers you are successful. So what is alluding you? Simple question you haven’t answered:

What do you want your life to look like?


Figure that out and you are more than halfway there. You then just need the balls to make it happen.

I think MJ nailed it. You are in too comfortable a position to move out of mediocrity.
 

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