I just put my house up for sale and no one I know understands why

[jakeG]

I am a single (well, have a girlfriend but not married) guy with no kids and a dog. I currently live in a 3BR 2.5BA house. I bought this house 3 years ago when I was still within the confines of the slowlane mindset. I am selling my house to move in to an apartment with my girlfriend. Doing so will decrease my living expenses $20-30k / year. All of this money will fund my business while I maintain my current 9-5 or will be saved to a point where I can leave my 9-5 and have enough savings to live and commit all of my time to my business. My current income is at the very bottom of 6 figures.

None of my friends or family understand why I am selling my house. I have received several lectures from my parents on why they think this is a bad idea. They are boomers and still paying off a mortgage. None of my friends actively agree with me on the move either. I know they're all wrong because they're all slowlaners and live inside the typical American Dream box. The only person who fully supports this decision is my girlfriend. She is of the fastlane and entrepreneurial mindset like myself.

Does anyone else have experience with this? My mind keeps going back to Gary Vee and Andy Frisella. Gary talks a lot about how too many people will never chase their dream because they are chained to their homes that they dont need and only have to impress other people that do not care. Andy talks about how no one will support you during your journey, but will say "I always believed in you" when you succeed. These two guys and what they preach is helping me sticky to my guns on selling the home.

Does anyone else have any similar stories or advice on downsizing to fund their business? I'm really just LAMPing for some validation

 

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[Kak]

Dump that house!

I fully support avoiding lifestyle entrapment.

 

[AgainstAllOdds]

Some life lessons for you:

1. Only take advice from people you want to become.
2. 99.9% of people you know don't care whether you fail or succeed.

Do what you want. Make the decisions that you think are right. And ignore the naysayers.

Housing prices are high right now - it's a good time to sell and hold cash... especially if it nets you $20k to 30k a year. Most people buy businesses and make investments to net $20-30k a year. Think about that. Meanwhile you're doing the opposite. How much would you have to invest in the stock market to get that $20k to $30k?

$400,000 to $600,000?

Meanwhile you're doing what? Investing $0 and maybe even getting a check for your equity in the house?

Your approach is the correct one, but note: it won't be easy.

A lot of people will make fun of you, shit on you, and heighten your self-doubt. Ignore them. Your parents and closest friends probably love you, but they're not of the correct mindset to understand success.

As for the rest... they probably don't care about you at all so there's no point to take their advice.

Going off of point #2 above, let me share an anecdote. On Thursday, I stopped in Atlantic City between meetings to spend the night. I hit a poker cash game, played for a bit, and met some characters. One character started telling us that he owed a guy $300 and that the guy was out to kill him if he didn't get him his money back. Do you know what the general response was from the table to that story? The most empathy he got was "damn, that sucks man," and then no one cared after that. People are too preoccupied with themselves to care. Even if someone's out to kill you, chances are that no one cares.

Live your life the way you want to live it.

You're the main character in your own movie.

If you want to be an entrepreneur and try things out "risk free", then selling your house is the absolute easiest way to do it.

 

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[jakeG]

Rent it out?

I've definitely thought about that. But every time came to the conclusion that the couple hundred bucks a month I would make in rent would not be worth the time or effort. I could spend a few hours per month managing plus the burden of risk as a landlord to make a couple hundred bucks, or pick up a few more hours of work. I'm a programmer and charge $100-$125 an hour

 

[MitchC]

If the people who are telling you not to sell your house are not living the life you want to be living then why would you follow thier advice?

Same goes for understanding, if they understood they would probably have made similar decisions in thier life and be living where you want to be.

 

[Raoul Duke]

Rent it out?

 

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[jakeG]

UPDATE
The house has sold and I close on Monday. Moving in to the gfs apartment. Rent for her apartment is 950. My mortgage/rent is being cut from 1375 / month to 475. Sold a lot of my big ticket items (Big Green Egg, home gym, etc.) and donated a lot of the cheap stuff to Salvation Army.

This has been a pretty stressful process trying to figure out what all to get rid of and how.

The gf has two possible jobs lined up. One still here in town but another in Tampa. So we could be here for another month, or for the foreseeable future.

What I am most excited about is being done with this process so I can get back to full time focus on my app.

Thanks for the guidance TMF fam

 

[jakeG]

UPDATE

It's been an insane year to say the least. Shortly after my post last April, my girlfriend and I moved in to a larger apartment. After being in that apartment for NINE days, the apartment complex pulled the rug out from under the entire building and all residents. We were all FORCED to leave the building due to safety concerns. The building had burnt in the previous year and the building had not been properly rebuilt. The building owners knew that the "renovated" building had flaws, and was potentially inhabitable, but continued to sell leases. You can read more on the story here and here. We're (over 100 residents) currently in a legal battle with the building owners and we will likely see some type of damages paid out to us within the next 18 months. Anyway, this forced us to move again. This time we had very little options available. We ended up moving out to an apartment in the burbs.

In the past 12 months I've been able to build a cash cushion of 50k. Several posters here said that would be impossible just from selling my house but I digress. Last week I submitted my notice to my employer and will be leaving my job at the end of June. I'll be doing freelance development work (shakeyg.com) to pay the bills while focusing most of my time on my app.

It's also noteworthy that my girlfriend found a job right as we had moved in to the previous place. Our current place is less than a 5 min drive for her so that worked out nicely. But ended up not mattering because she too left her job a few weeks ago. In 6 short months (worked on her business while employed full time) she has grown her business to a point where she is now earning way more (25% more) than she was at her job. She has amassed most of her clientele during this pandemic, so she is doing an incredible job.

Anyway, I'm following the plan that I put in to place about 2 years ago. House sold -- built a cash cushion -- left job -- full time on my own #feelsgoodman. Now the real fun begins.

 

[Kung Fu Steve]

I know several people who would never own.

Hell, one guy I know owns over 10,000 doors... and he rents his own place.

It didn't start with Gary Vee of course... RK said consistently your own home is a liability, not an asset.

 

[Zcott]

Cutting your living expenses by $20k a year is impressive. Tell your friends you're getting a $20k salary increase and see how they react instead.

 

[SteveO]

These types of decisions are all very personal. Do what you want.

On the flip side. I have made many decisions that I have later regretted. No need for regrets though. The trick is to keep forging your path.

 

[biophase]

In 2003 I sold my house and moved back in with my parents to do this same thing. My reason was that I couldn't rent my house out for cash flow. I ended up moving to AZ in 2004 after that and the rest is history.

BTW, I sold for $345k, and then in 2011 it sold for $280k, and was just listed at $360k. So $15k appreciation in 15 years? It's not always good to keep your real estate for appreciation sakes, you never know what will happen.

 

[Kak]

Rent it out?

If you can do this profitably... Not a bad idea at all.

 

[jakeG]

Dump that house!

I fully support avoiding lifestyle entrapment.

Thanks @Kak !! This house has become a financial prison and burden. I just feel like a crazy person since I am apparently the only person I know that sees it that way

 

[Bearcorp]

I did this a few years ago and also moved into a city apartment with my GF, cut my living expenses right down, allowed me to quit my job sooner and focus on my business. It's your life, get after it and don't let the naysayers hold you back!

 

[jakeG]

I was going to suggest renting unused rooms on Airbnb, if your area is near companies that might have temporary employees, but I just checked out Birmingham on Sperling's Best Places, and while properties have appreciated by 11% in the past year, they are down nearly 5% for the past 10 years. The job market is also dropping, and though slated to increase, will do so at less than the national average, but I don't know your area. Also, there is a 20% vacancy rate for renting. I would sell, unless you bought it when housing prices were really low.
Birmingham, Alabama Housing

Wow this is awesome. Thank you so much! My area is lower market. Definitely not considered the nice part of town, but also not the worst. Selling seems to be the best option right now. Looking at the average rent rates on the map provided -- the average rate is below my mortgage. Granted, my home is newer and generally nicer than the average home in my area, I would still at best be making just a few hundred dollars a month on renting. In my opinion the risk reward just doesn't make sense for me to rent.

 

[Rabby]

You're doing it right. Sell it or rent it out if it's a burden. Something that forces you to keep a job and makes you intolerant to startup risk... well that's not an asset at all. It's just another liability.

We all get confused looks from on-script friends and family.

Also... with two of you interested in building assets... OMG, that's so powerful. Plenty of people have to argue with their SO over priorities... should we invest in our business, or buy more junk? Aw, but I like junk!

Good luck!

 

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[RazorCut]

Some life lessons for you:

1. Only take advice from people you want to become.
2. 99.9% of people you know don't care whether you fail or succeed.

Do what you want. Make the decisions that you think are right. And ignore the naysayers.

Gold studded with diamonds right there.

In fact I would go further. A lot of your friends don't want you to succeed as that makes them feel threatened and insecure. They want you to stay at their level or, ideally, slightly below. It's not their fault, just human nature. They want you to stay in the middle of their pack, not rise above it.

So they give you guidance, their 'wise council' in order to keep you in your place. To limit you to their level rather than see you rise to levels that they are too afraid or comfortable to attempt to reach out for themselves.

Sad but true.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Typical response from the Scripted gallery in your life.

When your action doesn't comply to Scripted rules and norms, you'll face friction. In other words, you're getting Semmelwashed. (Unscripted , pg 178)

“This renaissance story demonstrates the next bias you’ll face on your UNSCRIPTED path: Semmelwashing. However, Semmelwashing doesn’t come from your mind; it comes from the hive mind of the mainstream. It’s what happens when unconventional crashes into conventional. When traditional paradigms are opposed or questioned, not only is the message attacked but so is the messenger. A Semmelwashing is the friction we face when other people discover we aren’t following the conventional SCRIPTED brainwash.

For them, you’ll likely come across as unwashed, a rubber band needing a “snap back” to reality, namely their reality. For example, prepare for a Semmelwashing after telling your parents you’d rather skip college so you can remain debt-free. Prepare for a Semmelwashing after Facebooking that you’ve quit your job to pursue something impressively fulfilling instead of remaining depressingly employed. Prepare for a Semmelwashing when your trendy friends can’t understand why you’re driving a decade-old Camry while they drive new cars. Anytime you defy convention and stamp a path where few tread, expect oppositional floggings from ordinary people with a reeducation on what convention demands.”

Excerpt From: MJ DeMarco. “UNSCRIPTED : Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Entrepreneurship.” iBooks.

 

[jakeG]

I did this a few years ago and also moved into a city apartment with my GF, cut my living expenses right down, allowed me to quit my job sooner and focus on my business. It's your life, get after it and don't let the naysayers hold you back!

Boom!! Exactly what I needed hear. Thanks man!

 

[chuckypita]

You. Are. A. SUPER. Hero.

Nothing but success to you and your future! The world is full of opportunity - you're going to nail it.

 

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[biophase]

Do you mind sharing if what your house is worth and what your mortgage is compared to renting an apartment. Why do your friends/family think it's crazy? What is their thought process on why it's a bad idea?

 

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[Johnny boy]

“I’m selling my home in a high market to avoid loss of equity, lower living expenses, free up cash for business usage and lower my bills and resulting stress. If you don’t understand that then I’ll be laughing at you in a couple years”.

Tell that to everyone.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Based on the numbers you presented, I like it the idea of selling. You get some cash and reduce your monthly outlay.

I'd also guess you'd be selling at the top of the market. You've also alluded that the house is not in a very good part of town, decent, but not great -- as you start making goals, you will outlive the house and demand a better area anyway.

 

[DougeFreshAK]

Best of luck! It’s great to see somebody make some sacrifices today in order to set their future up for bigger and better things.

 

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[minivanman]

This is exactly why I never tell friends or family what I'm doing. I might get on here and tell something or some place else on the internet but I'd never tell friends and or family.

I'd say when we moved from a house to an apartment everyone thought I was crazy (I am but that's another story). Then when they visited the apartment they said things like.... this thing looks like a magazine.... and they loved the apartment. Now we've moved back in to a house (and they continue to think I'm crazy and that's why I never get their validation) but not because I'm a fan of 'owning a house'. That doesn't interest me at all, the lil woman just couldn't take the noise from the lady next door at 2am any longer.... on the other hand, that was my favorite part of an apartment!

 

[Andy Black]

Cutting your living expenses by $20k a year is impressive. Tell your friends you're getting a $20k salary increase and see how they react instead.

I used to use a handy rule of thumb that you needed a £2k annual salary increase to get an extra £100/mth in your hand.

If that’s similar in the US, then $20k a year ($1,600/mth) in your hand is like getting a $36k annual payrise.

 

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[Suzanne Bazemore]

I was going to suggest renting unused rooms on Airbnb, if your area is near companies that might have temporary employees, but I just checked out Birmingham on Sperling's Best Places, and while properties have appreciated by 11% in the past year, they are down nearly 5% for the past 10 years. The job market is also dropping, and though slated to increase, will do so at less than the national average, but I don't know your area. Also, there is a 20% vacancy rate for renting. I would sell, unless you bought it when housing prices were really low.
Birmingham, Alabama Housing

 

[jakeG]

You're doing it right. Sell it or rent it out if it's a burden. Something that forces you to keep a job and makes you intolerant to startup risk... well that's not an asset at all. It's just another liability.

We all get confused looks from on-script friends and family.

Also... with two of you interested in building assets... OMG, that's so powerful. Plenty of people have to argue with their SO over priorities... should we invest in our business, or buy more junk? Aw, but I like junk!

Good luck!

Thank you @Rabby !! I'm very much looking forward to the future with my gf

 

[James Klymus]

If the people who are telling you not to sell your house are not living the life you want to be living then why would you follow thier advice?

Same goes for understanding, if they understood they would probably have made similar decisions in thier life and be living where you want to be.

Yep, listen to the people who are where you want to be in life, not the peanut galley