How do you bounce back?

[Cascade]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm. It's just hard when

new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections
health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

each weekend i spend some time listing out everything that happened to be grateful for: sales, new clients, good hires, logistic problems solved, etc, etc

also just started 15 minute daily meditation in the morning

what are some other great ways to bounce back?

 

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[Imgal]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm.

Let's start by reframing this. Lately you've been learning some of the most important lessons - what is and isn't working with what you want to be doing with your life and your business. Great. Now you know what doesn't work. Make sure you're very clearly aware of what these are so you can note them down and make sure that you don't choose those avenues again.

It's just hard when new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections

You are not alone in this. People get really excited started new ventures. They have dreams and ambitions for them... and the truth is even the most patient person at their core can't tell you that they wouldn't like to start a business and for it to be an immediate success. We all do. The harsh truth is though that doesn't happen... and even if it appears it is you will still meet hurdles. I remember being convinced I was going to have the world's leading design agency because I got five clients within a week of launching... well that was all good, but then 3 months of not being able to find anyone at all (of course there was my targeting was just way of...) soon brought me down to reality with a bump.

It's probably worth at this point looking at your milestones and seeing if you're being over-ambitious. I'm the first to say aim higher, but if it's demoralising high for a new business it doesn't help anyone. I don't know the business that you're in, but if someone is interested then you need to be getting an agreement from them right then. With each day you're not in front of them telling them why they really need what you're offering the desire or feeling they need to have your product wanes. As @Vigilante mentioned in another post, you need to have your your team outside and ready to go not tomorrow, not next week, but right now.

Rejections are awesome. Listen to them. Why are people rejecting them. Those answers will provide you with the gold to transfer your offering to combat them.

health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test

I sincerely hope this improves for you. Tough times are tough when you feel strong. Feeling physically unwell on top of mentally drained is hard. I admire your commitment to pushing on.

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

I love you start this so positively. You need to stick with this. It will pull you through. It might feel like a flood of disappointment and problems right now, but honestly is not.... just as waves wash in, they wash back out and you get to see what they have washed in with them. For you these are some powerful lessons that can truly be the making of you and your business. If you want this, you've got this.

 

[Cascade]

Let's start by reframing this.


I love you start this so positively. You need to stick with this. It will pull you through. It might feel like a flood of disappointment and problems right now, but honestly is not.... just as waves wash in, they wash back out and you get to see what they have washed in with them. For you these are some powerful lessons that can truly be the making of you and your business. If you want this, you've got this.

Good point...how we frame the world is how we see

and how we respond


thank you for the reply

why did I write this post?

if i can write down and define the problem, then it cannot be impossible, only at worst difficult

if you can read this post and feel connected/touched then know that at some moment in your life you went through a rough patch and today is great because you are better since that moment

if we can share how we bounced back in the past this collection of personal sharing will be a super resource for all those getting ahead in life to lean on when the skies are dark

 

[Mattie]

 

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[Gsuz]

Amazing advice already given in this thread and it seems like you got some solid methods already in place.

Watch the last seconds of this video (rest is pretty good as well):

from 13:08 on and make it your mantra. Look at Elon's facial expression, emulate it, repeat it, live by it.

Priorititze your health over everything else. Health >> Money.

 

[Cascade]

Amazing advice already given in this thread and it seems like you got some solid methods already in place.

Watch the last seconds of this video (rest is pretty good as well):

from 13:08 on and make it your mantra. Look at Elon's facial expression, emulate it, repeat it, live by it.

Priorititze your health over everything else. Health >> Money.

Thanks for sharing

You guys are awesome

 

[Cascade]

The sound quality is a bit hard to listen when play, not sure if is my laptop

will try again later on

thanks for sharing

 

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[Mattie]

The sound quality is a bit hard to listen when play, not sure if is my laptop

will try again later on

thanks for sharing

Hmm..it's fine on mine. Hope you can get it clearer.

 

[Get Right]

It's all part of the process. The world is toughening you up for bigger things. Let it, just don't give up.

 

[Cascade]

Hmm..it's fine on mine. Hope you can get it clearer.

good stuff

thank you for sharing

 

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[sija1]

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

Like @Get Right says, the world's toughening you up for bigger things.
It may not seem this way right now, but these moments can actually be useful if you seize the opportunity.

"Until you're broken, you don't know what you're made of. It gives you the ability to rebuild yourself, stronger than ever before."

 

[pfalcomer]

Like @Get Right says, the world's toughening you up for bigger things.
It may not seem this way right now, but these moments can actually be useful if you seize the opportunity.

"Until you're broken, you don't know what you're made of. It gives you the ability to rebuild yourself, stronger than ever before."

The last part in parenthesis is SO strong. I wholeheartedly agree with all the info given so far.

If your product / service is not working, ASK why / what can you do to improve it.

Ask your clients what is an issue for them on a daily basis and look to provide the solution. Every single business has some problems, sort them out and you become more valuable to that company instantly.

Remember: our income is directly related to the VALUE we deliver to the market / our clients. That's why some people make $15 / hour and others make $26'000'000 a year (I know someone who makes that).

As mentioned before, write down what is working and what isn't then avoid repeating what doesn't work and rather focusing / expanding on what does.

Have complete childlike faith in yourself, in your business and in your ability and grind it out. You will succeed.

"The darkest hour is just before the dawn"

 

[LynnD5000]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm. It's just hard when
new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections
health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test
i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.
each weekend i spend some time listing out everything that happened to be grateful for: sales, new clients, good hires, logistic problems solved, etc, etc
also just started 15 minute daily meditation in the morning
what are some other great ways to bounce back?

The guys/gals on this forum are amazing and have provided Lots of really GREAT advice - my 2 cents might not be worth much - but I hope it helps.

I've done a few successful start-ups and more than a few train wreck startups over the years (to stupid to quit I guess) anyway - some things I learned that may help -

When prospective Clients are excited to buy your product - encourage you to do it and then - balk - when it arrives - I learned the hard way there is ALWAYS a reason.

I would look very closely at these 3 things:

1) Does your product/service REALLY fit or fix THEIR needs or were they just encouraging you as many friends do...I would perform a very careful revue from THEIR point of view (BE BRUTALLY HONEST - YOUR LIVELIHOOD/HEALTH DEPENDS ON IT) and if it doesn't fit - re-evaluate your product like it was brand new and figure out where you should have put it in the first place so it REALLY FITS the market to solve someones pain/problem.

2) If #1 doesn't seem to be the problem - recall as best as you can the early presentation of your ideas and determine if you Over-promised and Under-delivered...if so damage control and product improvement may be the immediate cure for the situation.

And Finally Last but not Least

3) is the asking Price higher than the perceived value...evaluate it from the customers point of view - is the product you designed to fix my pain worth the price you are asking - and again being honest would you pay the asking price - if not adjust accordingly.

The course I am writing is about your situation (been there and lost my caboose several times) I hope you get the idea from myself and the other forum members - Nobody gets it right the first time - hang in there - it sounds like you already have bulldog syndrome (bite it in the butt and pray for lockjaw) so I hope this helps - as for your sickness(s) they may be stress related (stress does REALLY weird things to you) - for me it caused migraines. Anyway the system I'm working on - I was going to call - The Backward Business Plan System - after some interesting observations by the forum members - I have to figure out a better title (I still don't get things right the 1st time) - maybe I'll call it - The Reverse Engineering Business System - anyway - if you find the above information of use I would REALLY Love to hear your story in more detail...Essentially the course is written for people where Failure is NOT an OPTION.
Good Luck
L

 

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[Cascade]

The guys/gals on this forum are amazing and have provided Lots of really GREAT advice - my 2 cents might not be worth much - but I hope it helps.

I

The course I am writing is about your situation (been there and lost my caboose several times) I hope you get the idea from myself and the other forum members - Nobody gets it right the first time - hang in there - it sounds like you already have bulldog syndrome (bite it in the butt and pray for lockjaw) so I hope this helps - as for your sickness(s) they may be stress related (stress does REALLY weird things to you) - for me it caused migraines. Anyway the system I'm working on - I was going to call - The Backward Business Plan System - after some interesting observations by the forum members - I have to figure out a better title (I still don't get things right the 1st time) - maybe I'll call it - The Reverse Engineered Business System - anyway - if you find the above information of use I would REALLY Love to hear your story in more detail...Essentially the course is written for people where Failure is NOT an OPTION.
Good Luck
L

Reading what you shared about title what popped into my mind was "Burn the first business plan (the biography was ALWAYS the only business plan)"

Which parts do you like more details about?

Not really comfortable going into too much details out here. Would be different when I have earned access to Speedway. Or we can share notes in private.

When will Speedway be option?
That's going to depend on the community. Patience!

 

[LynnD5000]

Reading what you shared about title what popped into my mind was "Burn the first business plan (the biography was ALWAYS the only business plan)"

Which parts do you like more details about?

Not really comfortable going into too much details out here. Would be different when I have earned access to Speedway. Or we can share notes in private.

When will Speedway be option?
That's going to depend on the community. Patience!

I Really like the "Burn the first business plan" concept A little creative wording and that could work!
As for contacting me direct - I thought I saw a way to do that somewhere on the site - I still a newbie at this so I don't know what the protocol is - maybe one of the more experienced members can throw us a bone on that one.
As for Speedway I have seen it on several members but I don't have a clue how to get it...

Thanks for the Idea,
L

 

[sija1]

I Really like the "Burn the first business plan" concept A little creative wording and that could work!
As for contacting me direct - I thought I saw a way to do that somewhere on the site - I still a newbie at this so I don't know what the protocol is - maybe one of the more experienced members can throw us a bone on that one.
As for Speedway I have seen it on several members but I don't have a clue how to get it...

Thanks for the Idea,
L

You can contact each other by sending a personal message (click on his name, send message)

As for speedway, you need to acquire a certain amount of speed points. I think at 40kph you get the access but I'm not 100% sure.

 

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[Cascade]

You can contact each other by sending a personal message (click on his name, send message)

As for speedway, you need to acquire a certain amount of speed points. I think at 40kph you get the access but I'm not 100% sure.

OK...mission: Speedway!

Hmm...

Step 1: How do I create value to share so that other fastlaners will benefit and help me get up to 40 kph

Step 2: Rinse & repeat

Hmm...

 

[Delmania]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm. It's just hard when

new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections
health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

each weekend i spend some time listing out everything that happened to be grateful for: sales, new clients, good hires, logistic problems solved, etc, etc

also just started 15 minute daily meditation in the morning

what are some other great ways to bounce back?

Meditation and practicing gratitude are excellent. Do you exercise regularly? If not, start that. Make sure your diet is good as well.

As for your startup: it's time to pivot.

I would say most of your issues are dealing with disappointment and failure. This is incredibly common in start ups, especially when first time entrepreneurs pour their heart into something they truly believe in. The situation doesn't go as well as planned, and people's hopes and dreams come crashing down. The truth is, failing is one of the absolute best things that can happen to you, since it's a good sign of how on track you are. The trick, however, is not to have one big failure, but rather smaller ones that allow you to adjust course quickly before you've invested too much. Have you read the Lean Startup? If not, I'd start there, the book dedicate 2 sections to measuring how well you're doing and how to pivot

 

[Cascade]

Meditation and practicing gratitude are excellent. Do you exercise regularly? If not, start that. Make sure your diet is good as well.

As for your startup: it's time to pivot.

I would say most of your issues are dealing with disappointment and failure. This is incredibly common in start ups, especially when first time entrepreneurs pour their heart into something they truly believe in. The situation doesn't go as well as planned, and people's hopes and dreams come crashing down. The truth is, failing is one of the absolute best things that can happen to you, since it's a good sign of how on track you are. The trick, however, is not to have one big failure, but rather smaller ones that allow you to adjust course quickly before you've invested too much. Have you read the Lean Startup? If not, I'd start there, the book dedicate 2 sections to measuring how well you're doing and how to pivot

pivot? @Delmania you may be right

what appreciate most from all the posts here was the support and encouragement

Lean Startup is a great book for everyone...then comes the key which is application

If there was a re-print of the book a possible additional chapter should discuss what I have come to appreciate as the "rhythm of business"

For example

In the online SEO/affiliate/marketing business it is possible to 'fail' every few hours and in fact the successful ones do just that. Create => push out => feedback => adapt

In a tech-heavy industry like mobile app or software (including online/cloud) it is also possible to have cycles measured in days

Try pivoting in days or even weeks in the construction industry or the medical industry...

when there is higher starting capex or government licensing approvals then the rhythm of business involves longer cycles. (Joke: Fast Red Tape is oxymoron)

 

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[Mattie]

What is bouncing back? It's resilience. Taking the blows and hits, staying focused, not allowing other people to distract you from your goals. Staying firm and planted, centered, and balanced. The avalanche can come falling down around you, but it's keeping your mind on the target. Obstacles will always arrive, other people will interfere, people will give you negative feedback. You are in control over the situation. It's how you perceive it, act, and respond to it. The moment you let your self slide and swing in the lower thinking, this is where you get lost.

I used to watch a lot of surfing videos while I wrote poetry, and in the middle of the eye of the hurricane you're not worried about how large the wave is coming at you, you're focused on keeping your balance, making the right moves, driving yourself in the right direction honing your skills. If you're not focused, you end up losing your balance, falling off your board, and sucked under the waves, and dragged under and your body gets dragged across the bottom of the ocean. Same thing with life or entrepreneurship.

 

[Cascade]

What is bouncing back? It's resilience. Taking the blows and hits, staying focused, not allowing other people to distract you from your goals. Staying firm and planted, centered, and balanced. The avalanche can come falling down around you, but it's keeping your mind on the target. Obstacles will always arrive, other people will interfere, people will give you negative feedback. You are in control over the situation. It's how you perceive it, act, and respond to it. The moment you let your self slide and swing in the lower thinking, this is where you get lost.

I used to watch a lot of surfing videos while I wrote poetry, and in the middle of the eye of the hurricane you're not worried about how large the wave is coming at you, you're focused on keeping your balance, making the right moves, driving yourself in the right direction honing your skills. If you're not focused, you end up losing your balance, falling off your board, and sucked under the waves, and dragged under and your body gets dragged across the bottom of the ocean. Same thing with life or entrepreneurship.

great analogy @Mattie

and highlighted the best part of your comment: choose our response

 

[Ubermensch]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm. It's just hard when

new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections
health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

each weekend i spend some time listing out everything that happened to be grateful for: sales, new clients, good hires, logistic problems solved, etc, etc

also just started 15 minute daily meditation in the morning

what are some other great ways to bounce back?

I get this. Taking blows sucks - why do you think they literally call it "taking blows"?

It sounds like you have some mommy issues. Let's take a look at those, first.

By "mommy," I mean the mother of you, myself and every living creature to ever exist.

Indeed, I mean Mother Nature, the most ruthless, heartless, and callous figure imaginable. Even a cursory glance at her long, bloody and violent history demonstrates that whatever you face in life, you should consider yourself lucky. Whereas the so-called monsters (Hitler, Stalin, etc) of history get all of the blame (credit?) - with their sadistic masochism, their genocides and mass murders - we too easily forget what mommy has done.

In recent events, we see her stone-cold mass-murdering capabilities with tsunamis, immense enough to wash away life by the tens of thousands, with waves so big that not even Laird Hamilton would risk surfing them. This is to say nothing of her earthquakes and volcanoes, her lakes of fire beneath, spewing lava, magma and liquid flames hotter than the furnaces in any Nazi death camp. Far more effective than any internment camp or gulag, Mother Nature's "natural disasters" and general hostility to life has nearly wiped out every living creature on the planet. More than once. More than twice.

So, first, count your blessings. At least you're a not nine year old African child with HIV/AIDS, your fate predetermined by actions outside of your locus of control. At least the explosion of a supervolcano has not plunged the world into eons of a nearly unlivable "Volcanic Winter."

At least you are alive, and have a great degree of control of your own life, obviously enough to self-direct yourself towards the the freedom-seeking life of entrepreneurship.

Just some perspective, friend! Everyone knows the story of Bob's trip to the doctor. He goes to the doctor, because his left knee hurts. The doctor promptly takes a hammer and gives Bob's right knee a solid whack! Problem fixed. Bob no longer felt the insignificant pain, and felt only the real, immediate pain.

When I hit a low point in life (a few years ago), I instinctual lashed out, blamed a lot of people. Then I had a reality check.

No matter what gets you down, no matter what "blows" life throws at you - and no matter how much life seems to just blow - consider yourself lucky that Mother Nature has spared you. You are not a hungry child in the third world. You are not a rights deprived woman in the middle east.

No matter how bad it hurts, remember that it is, quite literally, NOT the end of the world.

Even on the worst day, the night will come, and the night is always darkest before dawn. Nothing(?), not even pain, lasts forever.

Or, maybe that's not right. After all, in the American film Gladiator, Maximus Decimus Meridius admonishes his soldiers that what they do in life echoes in eternity. Cesare Borgia echoes the same notion. What sounds will you leave behind for future generations? Will they even hear you, or will you be silenced under 13.9 billion years of history? Will they even remember your name? If your reverberations do make it to the ears of future generations - or perhaps to the gods! - what will they hear? Will they hear the melancholy meowing of a grumpy kitten, or the Alpha-declaration of a lion?

I will make you a simple promise. If you continue to work, and slay your demons until "there is no one else," if you keep your head down and focus on greatness, you will know the exact 180 degree opposite emotion, the exact reverse feeling that you felt when you typed the OP.

Is that worth fighting for? Will you bleed just a little longer for that? How about the looks on the faces of your critics, when they see the result of years of critical thinking... is the look on their faces when you're winning worth it?

Actually, forget that. It's about being able to look yourself in the mirror. Imagine how it will feel to be so successful that all you can do is smile and congratulate yourself for staying the course, for not giving up, for never giving in, for staying true to yourself.

Ultimately, your plight might come down to patience, perhaps one of the most difficult disciplines to master. Have you ever seen those mazes on the back of cereal boxes? Those games simulate the process of entrepreneurship. You take one course, and you hit resistance. Capricious prospects who seemed ready to move forward come up with ingenious objections. This delays the success, the revenue, the sales, and the profit that would translate into victory. Rejection in the board room stings worse than rejection in the bedroom, because you can always find a new lover. If you are "doing" what you love, if you are married to your game, then the rejection can feel like the end of the world.

No matter what, though, you keep playing the game. You keep retracing your steps, remembering and learning from how and where you hit resistance, until you find the course that leads you to your end goal. It is your focus on the end goal that pulls your mind out of the present situation and allows you to endure the tough, often brutal steps and chain of steps necessary to get to your goal.

The most epic tales of heroism and victory culminate in a resurrection, a glorious moment when time itself seems to split in half, when even death itself feels cheated, when the chump-turned-to-champ reveals the "impossible" as possible, and we judge history in a kind of "before the resurrection" or "after the resurrection" context. Your ascension from the moment you posted the OP depends entirely on you, and you have all of the weaponry to make it a comeback fierce enough to raise Nietzsche from his grave and give you a standing ovation. And, as Nietzsche wrote, it all comes down to your WILL. Will you lose, or will you win? Will you retrench rather than rethink? Will you put in the hours upon days upon weeks upon months upon years necessary to get to your goal? Will you clearly focus upon your end game, whilst simultaneously meditating upon the obstacles and steps that will pop up on the journey there? Will you force yourself to develop the habits of mental toughness, of meditation, of affirming a self-belief so indomitable that you develop an almost trance-like, pious and even transcendent level of confidence? Will you resist the urge to give into short-term pleasures - television, recreational drug use, partying, wasting time with "friends," etc - in order to sharpen your will? Will you? It depends on your WILL.

You have to view your mind as a muscle to be flexed, worked out, and pushed to the limit. In fact, you should see yourself as an athlete of the mind, in that the mental toughness and mind mastery required to perform the actions - and persist through the pain - is cultivated through sometimes sweaty, sometimes bloody, sometimes tearful repetition, persistence and fist-clenched determination.

If it hurts, quitting will only make the pain last forever. The only antidote is to keep trying. Winning is immunity.

If you were to mathematically graph the trajectory of the slow lane "thinker" and "doer" (I put these terms in quotes, because sheep do not "think" and just going through the motions in life does not equal "doing"), you could use the algebraic graph of y = x.

The trajectory of the hustler's life is more like the graph of y = x to the third power. You start out at minus infinity, where you were when you posted this OP, but unlike y = x, you have exponential growth powers at your disposal. Since you only have so much time to ride the course of the arrow, your moments beneath zero feel like hell. Yet, once you crack through the black, the sky is literally the limit.

I'll leave you with a good Attila the Hun quote: What pains a man trains a man.

 

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[Mattie]

hmm...some great points again @ Ubermensch. I think you're filled with some wise words lately.

 

[AndrewNC]

I'm halfway through writing a chapter for my book on your exact topic, and then I come across this thread as I am looking to refine what I wrote.

In the chapter, I was talking about when my business crashed six months after I quit my job.

At the time, I was at home for the holidays with my family, and just ended my lease in Boulder, CO. Translation: No money and back at square 1.

But I later realized that after looking back at that experience, it held one of my greatest lessons to date.

I fell into that position because I stopped working on my business and spent all my time partying and having fun, while making passive income. Obvious from the outside, but oblivious while in it...I was procrastinating.

It's those moments where things crash which define us.

What did I do when everything crashed down? I could blame others, feel depressed, or choose to view it in a negative light.

But instead, I hunkered down, put all the skills and training to use that I've learned over the previous 3 years....and came back stronger...with new insights.

I was confident that it would eventually work out when I fix the root cause of what caused it to crash in the first place.

I'm viewing it in a tone that; what I went through was not a bad thing at all, but actually my greatest asset.

After a month of not taking action, I bought a new car on financing and signed a lease on an apartment across the country. This is what I do for accountability. If I didn't fix my business, my credit would be ruined and i would be in debt.

wo days later, I was back to making more income then before.

In my experience of pushing through a failure before, that event is nothing more than a signal to us that something we've been doing is not working. In my case, procrastination...and lack of control of my company (hosting on another company's platform as my only source of revenue).

As a result of that bad experience in my life, I now know exactly how to not procrastinate again. If I find myself slipping away from working hard...it is quickly corrected.

There is a lesson within, and the root cause that needs to be corrected.

I don't know your situation enough, but that's my experience from being in your shoes before.

 

[Andy Black]

I get this. Taking blows sucks - why do you think they literally call it "taking blows"?

It sounds like you have some mommy issues. Let's take a look at those, first.

By "mommy," I mean the mother of you, myself and every living creature to ever exist.

Indeed, I mean Mother Nature, the most ruthless, heartless, and callous figure imaginable. Even a cursory glance at her long, bloody and violent history demonstrates that whatever you face in life, you should consider yourself lucky. Whereas the so-called monsters (Hitler, Stalin, etc) of history get all of the blame (credit?) - with their sadistic masochism, their genocides and mass murders - we too easily forget what mommy has done.

In recent events, we see her stone-cold mass-murdering capabilities with tsunamis, immense enough to wash away life by the tens of thousands, with waves so big that not even Laird Hamilton would risk surfing them. This is to say nothing of her earthquakes and volcanoes, her lakes of fire beneath, spewing lava, magma and liquid flames hotter than the furnaces in any Nazi death camp. Far more effective than any internment camp or gulag, Mother Nature's "natural disasters" and general hostility to life has nearly wiped out every living creature on the planet. More than once. More than twice.

So, first, count your blessings. At least you're a not nine year old African child with HIV/AIDS, your fate predetermined by actions outside of your locus of control. At least the explosion of a supervolcano has not plunged the world into eons of a nearly unlivable "Volcanic Winter."

At least you are alive, and have a great degree of control of your own life, obviously enough to self-direct yourself towards the the freedom-seeking life of entrepreneurship.

Just some perspective, friend! Everyone knows the story of Bob's trip to the doctor. He goes to the doctor, because his left knee hurts. The doctor promptly takes a hammer and gives Bob's right knee a solid whack! Problem fixed. Bob no longer felt the insignificant pain, and felt only the real, immediate pain.

When I hit a low point in life (a few years ago), I instinctual lashed out, blamed a lot of people. Then I had a reality check.

No matter what gets you down, no matter what "blows" life throws at you - and no matter how much life seems to just blow - consider yourself lucky that Mother Nature has spared you. You are not a hungry child in the third world. You are not a rights deprived woman in the middle east.

No matter how bad it hurts, remember that it is, quite literally, NOT the end of the world.

Even on the worst day, the night will come, and the night is always darkest before dawn. Nothing(?), not even pain, lasts forever.

Or, maybe that's not right. After all, in the American film Gladiator, Maximus Decimus Meridius admonishes his soldiers that what they do in life echoes in eternity. Cesare Borgia echoes the same notion. What sounds will you leave behind for future generations? Will they even hear you, or will you be silenced under 13.9 billion years of history? Will they even remember your name? If your reverberations do make it to the ears of future generations - or perhaps to the gods! - what will they hear? Will they hear the melancholy meowing of a grumpy kitten, or the Alpha-declaration of a lion?

I will make you a simple promise. If you continue to work, and slay your demons until "there is no one else," if you keep your head down and focus on greatness, you will know the exact 180 degree opposite emotion, the exact reverse feeling that you felt when you typed the OP.

Is that worth fighting for? Will you bleed just a little longer for that? How about the looks on the faces of your critics, when they see the result of years of critical thinking... is the look on their faces when you're winning worth it?

Actually, forget that. It's about being able to look yourself in the mirror. Imagine how it will feel to be so successful that all you can do is smile and congratulate yourself for staying the course, for not giving up, for never giving in, for staying true to yourself.

Ultimately, your plight might come down to patience, perhaps one of the most difficult disciplines to master. Have you ever seen those mazes on the back of cereal boxes? Those games simulate the process of entrepreneurship. You take one course, and you hit resistance. Capricious prospects who seemed ready to move forward come up with ingenious objections. This delays the success, the revenue, the sales, and the profit that would translate into victory. Rejection in the board room stings worse than rejection in the bedroom, because you can always find a new lover. If you are "doing" what you love, if you are married to your game, then the rejection can feel like the end of the world.

No matter what, though, you keep playing the game. You keep retracing your steps, remembering and learning from how and where you hit resistance, until you find the course that leads you to your end goal. It is your focus on the end goal that pulls your mind out of the present situation and allows you to endure the tough, often brutal steps and chain of steps necessary to get to your goal.

The most epic tales of heroism and victory culminate in a resurrection, a glorious moment when time itself seems to split in half, when even death itself feels cheated, when the chump-turned-to-champ reveals the "impossible" as possible, and we judge history in a kind of "before the resurrection" or "after the resurrection" context. Your ascension from the moment you posted the OP depends entirely on you, and you have all of the weaponry to make it a comeback fierce enough to raise Nietzsche from his grave and give you a standing ovation. And, as Nietzsche wrote, it all comes down to your WILL. Will you lose, or will you win? Will you retrench rather than rethink? Will you put in the hours upon days upon weeks upon months upon years necessary to get to your goal? Will you clearly focus upon your end game, whilst simultaneously meditating upon the obstacles and steps that will pop up on the journey there? Will you force yourself to develop the habits of mental toughness, of meditation, of affirming a self-belief so indomitable that you develop an almost trance-like, pious and even transcendent level of confidence? Will you resist the urge to give into short-term pleasures - television, recreational drug use, partying, wasting time with "friends," etc - in order to sharpen your will? Will you? It depends on your WILL.

You have to view your mind as a muscle to be flexed, worked out, and pushed to the limit. In fact, you should see yourself as an athlete of the mind, in that the mental toughness and mind mastery required to perform the actions - and persist through the pain - is cultivated through sometimes sweaty, sometimes bloody, sometimes tearful repetition, persistence and fist-clenched determination.

If it hurts, quitting will only make the pain last forever. The only antidote is to keep trying. Winning is immunity.

If you were to mathematically graph the trajectory of the slow lane "thinker" and "doer" (I put these terms in quotes, because sheep do not "think" and just going through the motions in life does not equal "doing"), you could use the algebraic graph of y = x.

The trajectory of the hustler's life is more like the graph of y = x to the third power. You start out at minus infinity, where you were when you posted this OP, but unlike y = x, you have exponential growth powers at your disposal. Since you only have so much time to ride the course of the arrow, your moments beneath zero feel like hell. Yet, once you crack through the black, the sky is literally the limit.

I'll leave you with a good Attila the Hun quote: What pains a man trains a man.

Whoa. When you're not being too crazy to follow, you have a seriously good way with words. Rep+

 

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[Cascade]

Thanks for all the wonderful replies

 

[Dami-B]

Been taking blows in just about every area lately yet I know that the secret is to hold my inner mind firm. It's just hard when

new start up is not achieving the milestones we planned for
prospective clients who sounded so keen before we went ahead are not coming through
rejections
health..doctor doesn't know why...been in hospital twice this year and every other week review/check/test

i believe this is the low point, so great to start low because can only get better from here. some nights i feel quite lost and want to scream for some answers to come to help make sense of what seems like flood of disappointment and problems.

each weekend i spend some time listing out everything that happened to be grateful for: sales, new clients, good hires, logistic problems solved, etc, etc

also just started 15 minute daily meditation in the morning

what are some other great ways to bounce back?

Haha...I read this and I just started laughing, cus this was me a few months ago. Until I realized something. NOBODY, Not MJ, not mark cuban, not even bill gates is at their full potential. Life is an adventure, maybe in MJ is the potential to write a thousand life changing books, and he's only written one. He's just getting started. Guess what? So are you. You don't turn your life around by sulking or crying, Are Lions known for crying or roaring? Come on man, BE A LION, you can overcome those problems you're facing, there is enough strength in you. Maybe you have the potential to build 500 schools that will alleviate ignorance from a particular sect of people. And rather than go after your dreams, you are sulking. Don't be a pussycat, be a LION, Roar at you problems and face them head on.
Destiny, Dreams is not a destination, its an adventure, and we are all on the journey, there is no arrival point, its just more and more. Keep on going man, and I hope you make it.

 

[Cascade]

One year on


Big thank you to all who encouraged in this thread and in PM. Thank you! I really needed this
Still facing the greatest challenge of my life: health

 

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