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Guiding my brother towards the fastlane?

Dinho7

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Fastlaners, I need your advice. My younger brother is 19 years old and I want to guide him onto the entrepreneurial journey.

The main reason for this is because we are almost identical personalities with the exact same strenghts and weaknesses, and I would really have appreciated somebody telling me a lot of things about business when I had his age. Instead, I wasted 5-6 years partying, watching TV, sleeping until late, studying journalism and generally not fulfilling my potential in any way.

Not before I read Rich Dad Poor Dad and TMF at the age of 24 did I realize what I was missing out on. Since then, I have read countless non-fiction books, taken a lot of business courses and started my first real business that have taught me many, many invaluable lessons.

My brother is a smart kid that has always been good with money and numbers, and I know he has an entrepreneur in him. But he is also quite spoiled, lacks discipline, and would never pick up a book after 12 years of mandatory school where you are told which (often not too intriguing) books to read. He has no network and is not collecting impulses from successful people to "fill the cup".

Basically, he is programmed by society to get a college degree, look for a "safe" job, get a car loan and a mortgage on a nice apartment, enjoy the yearly vacation and retire comfortably in 45 years.

The question is... How do I convey this message to my brother? How do I make him realize that he is on path to miss out on a life of freedom and fulfillment that can not only make him happier, but that can also enrich the life of others?

Pay him to read RDPD & TMF ? Have a pep talk with the benefits of self-development and self-education? Show him pictures of the lifestyle he can have IF he puts in the necessary work?
 
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jon.a

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Pay him to read RDPD & TMF ? Have a pep talk with the benefits of self-development and self-education? Show him pictures of the lifestyle he can have IF he puts in the necessary work?
Absolutely not!
Start him on RDPD. Tell him you wished that you had read it earlier. There's no need to put on an elaborate show. Or, just send him here. Maybe to this thread.
 

Charnell

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Yup, the hardest thing to do is to try to force someone out of their beliefs. Just give him a book, tell him you think he'll like reading it, then a few weeks later ask him if he enjoyed it.

That's what I did for my best friend, unfortunately, I'm still playing the waiting game. He always talks about wanting to start a gym...
 

jason91

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Fastlaners, I need your advice. My younger brother is 19 years old and I want to guide him onto the entrepreneurial journey.

The main reason for this is because we are almost identical personalities with the exact same strenghts and weaknesses, and I would really have appreciated somebody telling me a lot of things about business when I had his age. Instead, I wasted 5-6 years partying, watching TV, sleeping until late, studying journalism and generally not fulfilling my potential in any way.

Not before I read Rich Dad Poor Dad and TMF at the age of 24 did I realize what I was missing out on. Since then, I have read countless non-fiction books, taken a lot of business courses and started my first real business that have taught me many, many invaluable lessons.

My brother is a smart kid that has always been good with money and numbers, and I know he has an entrepreneur in him. But he is also quite spoiled, lacks discipline, and would never pick up a book after 12 years of mandatory school where you are told which (often not too intriguing) books to read. He has no network and is not collecting impulses from successful people to "fill the cup".

Basically, he is programmed by society to get a college degree, look for a "safe" job, get a car loan and a mortgage on a nice apartment, enjoy the yearly vacation and retire comfortably in 45 years.

The question is... How do I convey this message to my brother? How do I make him realize that he is on path to miss out on a life of freedom and fulfillment that can not only make him happier, but that can also enrich the life of others?

Pay him to read RDPD & TMF ? Have a pep talk with the benefits of self-development and self-education? Show him pictures of the lifestyle he can have IF he puts in the necessary work?
Never, ever, EVER pay him to read a book.

If you can't convince him through describing the difference between a life of mediocrity and a life of accomplishment - he is not fit for the fastlane
 
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Charnell

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If you can't convince him through describing the difference between a life of mediocrity and a life of accomplishment - he is not fit for the fastlane
That's easier said than done. Simply describing a lifestyle of fast cars, women, and money sounds like a pipe dream. If his brother reads a few books and success stories and decides the lifestyle is not for him that's totally fine. If everyone is fastlane, no one is fastlane.
 

Dinho7

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I am going to try, but I fear that just the thought of reading a book from cover to end is going to want him run and hide. I was the same way. I think it has to do with all the boring books they made us read in middle school and high school. It felt like an obligation, and the teachers normally weren't able to highlight the benefits of the courses they were teaching.

If you can't convince him through describing the difference between a life of mediocrity and a life of accomplishment - he is not fit for the fastlane

I think that's pretty harsh. People can change. Sometimes you just need to be pushed enough, or time to realize on your own. My wife had been telling me about RDPD and I never bothered to read it. Some years later I did pick it up, and it changed my life.
 

jason91

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That's easier said than done. Simply describing a lifestyle of fast cars, women, and money sounds like a pipe dream. If his brother reads a few books and success stories and decides the lifestyle is not for him that's totally fine. If everyone is fastlane, no one is fastlane.
Oh, I didn't mean describe it in words. More like show him the difference in lifestyles, freedom, places to travel, foods to eat, basically everything that makes financial riches worth pursuing.

I am going to try, but I fear that just the thought of reading a book from cover to end is going to want him run and hide. I was the same way. I think it has to do with all the boring books they made us read in middle school and high school. It felt like an obligation, and the teachers normally weren't able to highlight the benefits of the courses they were teaching.



I think that's pretty harsh. People can change. Sometimes you just need to be pushed enough, or time to realize on your own. My wife had been telling me about RDPD and I never bothered to read it. Some years later I did pick it up, and it changed my life.

Remember, people have a sort of spring effect when you push them in a direction. I grew up with a father who literally wanted me to do this, do that, thought this was the best, etc. I did literally the opposite of everything he tried to make me do. It's great to try to assert our influence, but the best influence is usually to set a good example. When he sees you going on vacations whenever you want, or the lifestyle of luxury you enjoy, automatically that will rub off on him.

I didn't mean anything harsh like he isn't capable of being a fastlaner. I personally don't know you and your brother's relationship, so I can't say what will happen. I just know for many people, trying to get others to do something they're not interested in always has bad effects. The truth is he's got to commit to it himself :)
 
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MJ DeMarco

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Basically, he is programmed by society to get a college degree, look for a "safe" job, get a car loan and a mortgage on a nice apartment, enjoy the yearly vacation and retire comfortably in 45 years.

Do, don't tell. Be the example that you want to demonstrate.

You can't convince someone to open their eyes. However, if their eyes see YOU living a dream, you'll have their ear. Until then, your bro thinks you're just another dreamer of many.
 

Dinho7

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Remember, people have a sort of spring effect when you push them in a direction. I grew up with a father who literally wanted me to do this, do that, thought this was the best, etc. I did literally the opposite of everything he tried to make me do. It's great to try to assert our influence, but the best influence is usually to set a good example. When he sees you going on vacations whenever you want, or the lifestyle of luxury you enjoy, automatically that will rub off on him.

Do, don't tell. Be the example that you want to demonstrate.

You can't convince someone to open their eyes. However, if their eyes see YOU living a dream, you'll have their ear. Until then, your bro thinks you're just another dreamer of many.

Thanks for the feedback, this is very true and is probably the best way to go about this.

We live in different continents, though, and I rarely talk about how well the business is going or what I have achieved. I guess I need to be more open about it and see it as help and inspiration rather than "bragging".

Also, on the outside I am not living the dream (yet). I live modestly and I just recently got a positive balance in my business and personal accounts, so even though I am making decent money, I would not say I am an example to follow in that sense.

BUT, on the inside I feel like ten million bucks. I learn a lot every day, both from following people that are where I want to be, and from my own business venture. My network is growing, and so is my confidence and level of self-fulfillment. I don't worry about retirement or five years from now, because I know success is inevitable on the path that dedicated fastlaners are on.

I dont want my brother to wait for years to jump on the entrepreneurial journey until I am taking vacations whenever I want or havea lifestyle of luxury.
 

marklov

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Reminds me of a friend my best friend in fact.
Since I discovered the TFLF and marketing
I thought this is so good!
Lets share it with my best friend...

I didnt see it then
but to him the mastermind
talks were a dopamine fix rather than
advice to execute.

Months went by...
He got the chance to go to the US
I didn't (planned for next year).

After much execution, landed my biggest client
he on the other hand is working 2 jobs over there.

He had the knowledge to
execute but chose not to.

Heard about my client and
and asks to start things up again.

F*ck that

Still my friend but
not gonna happen.
 
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Ryan D.

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Ask him what happens to his "plan" if he gets into a car wreck and can't get up in the morning to go to work. That's what did it for me. I realized that if I die tomorrow my family would be screwed. My wife would lose our home and cars. She is a full-time student (PHD) while I work. I'd much rather live off of passive income and get up because I want to. Not because my bills say that I have to. I'm not there yet.... But I'm on my way!
 

Mattie

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I have a twenty year old son. How this works...I just show him projects I work on, and talk about what I am learning. lol I don't talk about him at all. Now being on here in a year, he's just watched and listened, and naturally he started doing things on his own and making his own progress. I just say look at this book, look at this video, it's cool. lmao! I don't say you have to read it. I don't say you have to watch it. I just say if you want too watch it, here's the link. Now in one year this kid turned from not doing anything to working two jobs, and hanging out with other entrepreneurs his age in animae making videos and board games. So no he's not getting rich, but he's getting active and interested.

I never lectured him, never forced it, and never really did anything. Be the example. See what I found? This didn't start with fast lane though, it started with him watching me push through obstacle after obstacle, sacrificing my play time, learning everything, and doing what ever it took to get through the next step. Fastlane was just the fuel to accelerate into another zone and gave us both options and opportunities to step outside of the box. I wouldn't worry about it to much. Fastlane takes you to a higher plane. I know it sounds spiritual ha ha! I still haven't found another book that illustrates the points he makes. And it is interesting going on face book after a year on Fastlane. I don't fit in any more. Ha ha! That shift in mindset makes all the difference. And I tell people to read his book all the time. Most of them think I'm a joking or don't bother reading it. And just don't respond at all. I don't think people are interested or serious enough to change their lives. And until your brother's ready for that move, there's nothing really you can do about it.

People think I'm nuts for being on here. And I usually ignore them. This is obvious. I've come to the realization I'm just speaking a different language now, and even trying to explain it to people, they don't get it. And I don't think you can go backwards mentally unless you allow yourself too, but why would you want too. Really your actions speak more than any words you could ever say.
 

Dinho7

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Awesome responses! It is good to come on here to get a mindset shift and good input. I feel more relaxed about the whole thing now and I'll try to be a good role model instead of pushing him into things he might not be ready for.
 
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