Down and out... a warning.

[CigarMan]

When I came to this forum many years ago I was a very different person and in a much better place than I am now..

I even had a couple well know members offer to help me out to get started but ran away because I was scared and had a comfortable life.

Fast forward many years later... I lost my job, life sucks and depressed. A job can disappear so don't be lazy.

So remember wasting time and giving up can have risks.

Good luck.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Timmy C]

I sympathize with your depression and anxiety as I have suffered and do suffer every day.

But you know what, doing nothing isn't an option! You may feel down and out god knows I've been there, but the question is what steps are you going to take to change buddy?

Take antidepressants, go see a counselor to work through your issues, start executing on a business idea, socialising more, hitting the gym? What is it?

You need to do something buddy, I'm sure you have people in your life to turn to.

Pm me if you like.

 

[IceCreamKid]

4 things, some of which have already been mentioned:

1. Get in shape. PM me if you want some pdf's outlining my strength routines.
2. Stop eating/drinking crap
3. Build competence in a skill that pays you
4. Talk to humans face to face

Do this for one year.

There is a dark side to entrepreneurship that social media rarely discusses. Remember you're not alone...you're not the first to go through this and certainly not the last. You'll be alright, just keep moving forward.

 

[RazorCut]

Sorry to hear of your difficulties. Lack of self-esteem, depression and social anxiety are all know contributing factors to chronic procrastination which is probably why you can't move forward and shake off your problems. I know right now it seems impossible but it's never too late to start over. You just have to make that decision.

I also know it sounds easy in print and is much harder in reality but there are ways to help you move forward little by little. Just coming here and posting shows you're not a lost cause and it's an indicator that you want help.

This is a great place to get that help to get you motivated and moving forward again but you have to take action at some point otherwise life will continue to spiral. You are more than welcome to PM me if you think it will benefit you.

All the best

RC

-

 

[Mattie]

When I came to this forum many years ago I was a very different person and in a much better place than I am now..

I even had a couple well know members offer to help me out to get started but ran away because I was scared and had a comfortable life.

Fast forward many years later... I lost my job, life sucks and depressed. A job can disappear so don't be lazy.

So remember wasting time and giving up can have risks.

Good luck.

Sorry to hear you're having a difficult time with anxiety and depression. I believe Viktor Frankyl is a perfect example of how you can be in the worst situation in life, and I doubt he ever expected to become successful in life.

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zF65lvwQPbw


Usually depression and anxiety has to do with perception, beliefs, environment, and forgetting that life is always filled with a roller coaster of ups and downs for some individuals. While others may have an easier time. Money is a false sense of security in some ways, since if you make wrong choices, there are consequences whether you're at the top of the world, in the middle of the world, or bottom of the world. I think I have a better perspective of the understanding everyone's experience is different and unique.

You can see even Elon Musk Changes and tons of money. I would say there's a billion ways to become a billionaire and a billion ways to loose it. It's all about choices of courses. Everything that goes up comes down. And everything that comes down goes up. You watch this happen every day of your life in your community. There will always be those moments of uncertainty, anxiety, and even depression. There will be just as many days you celebrate life and find happiness.

Is there really anyone on earth who doesn't experience what you feel at the moment?

 

[Kung Fu Steve]

Thanks man.

I have developed a very negative and critical mindset that has a strong grip on me, the comments really are helping me wake up.

Good thing mindsets don't have any actual hands to grip you with so that's not a problem

I think I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter what I think or how I feel. I just need to start taking positive action.

You take positive action to feel good, not feel good in order to take positive action.

One precedes the other.

I don't have any big goals.

How about you start with any goal? Why do they have to be big? Get to the gym this week. That's a goal. Achieve it!

I just want to stop the downward slide, get some confidence back.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[CigarMan]

Success is earned.

So go out and earn it bud.

Earn success grinding in the gym and get a great body and build strength, finding success doesn't have to directly relate to business. Getting rid of anxiety and depression is a form of success no?

Solve one problem at a time, you can't fix everything at once, but you can take steps everyday to fix it.

I will. You are right.

I won't waste another day feeling sorry for myself. I will post a update in 1 week.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Sorry to here about the job, but it just goes to show how things can change in a flash because of some corporate memo or an economic shift.

So what's the plan now?

And welcome back to the forum my friend.

 

[CigarMan]

Yeh little goals help for example ok I'm going to the gym 2 days this week and eating well no processed crap then the next week just build upon it every week, could be ok when I go down the street and do grocery shopping I'm gonna put my shoulders back, chest out smile and say hello to someone, next time a little more. You get the picture, just starting small and building can have a huge impact doing it on a consistent basis in a very short space of time.

I am starting today. No more wasted days. There is a lot I can do that I am not doing. I will see how things go from there.

 

[VentureVoyager]

@CigarMan
My two cents. Nobody really talks about it. And it's super important.

I'm super sleepy but "I feel you", man.

Don't start from 40 minutes of meditation. It's like starting your gym adventure with a 5 hour workout. Will it get you addicted to physical activity? No, it will make you hate gym and make you feel sick and overwhelmed. You will stop very soon and go back to downspiralling.

That's why most people fail their new year commitments. I did absolutely nothing for the past five years, or entire life, now I will start exercising 4 times a week for 2 hours. Hell yeah, what a great idea.

Start SMALL with everything. Do LESS that you would actually like to.
Start from working 1 hour a day on your business. When the timer rings, it's over. Congratulate yourself, but there's no more working for you. Workout 20 minutes a day, and NO MORE, even if you really want to spend days there.
Meditate 5 minutes a day, even if you feel like sitting there for 40 minutes.

Do you see what that does to you?

It gradually makes you angry that you can only take little steps. You are tricking your mind into the positive direciton. Instead of showing it that the new habit/thing or getting back to something you used to do is exhausting and overwhelming, you make yourself itchy to do more each day.

Instead of throwing youtself into the raging ocean and drowning, you learn how to swim again and develop passion for swimming. You build a habit.

Gradually increase the time you allow yourself to work/workout/whatever you should be doing.
You should get addicted to your new positive habits soon.

And keep a productivity spreadsheet and gratitude journal.
5 victories every single day. Can be super small, like getting out of bed before 9 am. But FIVE, every-single-day. And give yourself credit. Don't expect too much when you're starting from the low point. Certainly don't go the Gary V "hustle/grind for 23 hours a day and sleep one money money money success success success" way, you will get to a reasonable levels gradually. Have high standards, don't tolerate lame behaviors, but show yourself some understanding. Nothing worst than beating yourself up when you're depressed.

Reward yourself for every successful day (5 victories) - but in a healthy way that SUPPORTS you.

Read "The Compound Effect" if you haven't yet.

Also

QUIT - F*ckING - WEED. FOREVER.
It kills people. It's not "just weed, cmon", it's a deadly trap. I'm talking from my 12 years experience of smoking that ended very badly. Don't believe me? Ask clinical psychiatrists. But that's a topic for another post.

Good luck!

 

[Timmy C]

Thanks. I am actually doing some of that. It helps.

Yeh I find for me the gym really helps and being in a positive environment. The anxiety makes that hard I don't know if you get panic attacks at all but, yeh I understand if you don't go anywhere with that it is pritty shit, you don't wanna leave the house. There's a few books on that but I didn't get much good out of them, I tried antidepressants and it seems to be doing the trick and I'm now outta the house and its no longer a fear to be out in public, I know alot of people are against them but sometimes you do need that little extra help if you've exhausted other avenues. That may or may not be the right thing for you to do. But I totally get it dude.

 

[CigarMan]

You are not alone.

You can do this.

And even though it doesn't feel like it now... don't give up when you're 2 millimeters from greatness.

1. Decide what you want now.
2. Make a plan.
3. Take action.
4. Get flexible and change your approach if needed.
5. Repeat!

Thanks man.

I have developed a very negative and critical mindset that has a strong grip on me, the comments really are helping me wake up.

I think I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter what I think or how I feel. I just need to start taking positive action.

I don't have any big goals. I just want to stop the downward slide, get some confidence back.

 

[CigarMan]

Sorry to here about the job, but it just goes to show how things can change in a flash because of some corporate memo or an economic shift.

So what's the plan now?

And welcome back to the forum my friend.

The plan for this year is to stop the spiral.

Cut out the alcohol, weed, and junk food.

Start a intense workout routine.

Start a keto diet with intermittent fasting.. which has done wonders in the past.

Raise my standards... keep things in tip top shape.

Find some positive influences to counteract my negative thinking. I will read 1 book a week.

Good to be back.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[CigarMan]

4 things, some of which have already been mentioned:

1. Get in shape. PM me if you want some pdf's outlining my strength routines.
2. Stop eating/drinking crap
3. Build competence in a skill that pays you
4. Talk to humans face to face

Do this for one year.

There is a dark side to entrepreneurship that social media rarely discusses. Remember you're not alone...you're not the first to go through this and certainly not the last. You'll be alright, just keep moving forward.

This is exactly what I am doing.

Having a hard time sleeping without the weed an alcohol so I am exhausted.

Got rid of all the junk food. Went shopping this morning at 8am. Usually I just things delivered. Decided on a keto diet but with some fruit.. so call it low carb.

Someone suggested meditation. I did 40 mins, seems pointless to me but I will give it 90 days.

I did 1 hour the exercise bike and went 19.3 mikes.

Monday I am thinking I will get my car fixed... not exactly sure why but I always had a car.

As for skills I can develop. I have had lots of success as a trader in the past. Not sure I want to go that way because I am having a hard time engaging at the required level. I never did this for a living before so maybe the pressure will be too much... but I have consistently made money trading before I became depressed.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Timmy C]

I know. I just need to find a direction and some success. Much easier said than done.

Success is earned.

So go out and earn it bud.

Earn success grinding in the gym and get a great body and build strength, finding success doesn't have to directly relate to business. Getting rid of anxiety and depression is a form of success no?

Solve one problem at a time, you can't fix everything at once, but you can take steps everyday to fix it.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[GuitarManDan]

One of my all-time favorite things that I've ever read on Reddit that is great if you've never seen it.. here's the link below, hope this helps!

I just don't care about myself. : getdisciplined

 

[GSF]

GOLD! - 8 Steps That Will Radically Change Your Life in 30 Days or Less, Guaranteed.

 

[Kung Fu Steve]

You are not alone.

You can do this.

And even though it doesn't feel like it now... don't give up when you're 2 millimeters from greatness.

1. Decide what you want now.
2. Make a plan.
3. Take action.
4. Get flexible and change your approach if needed.
5. Repeat!

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Timmy C]

Thanks man.

I have developed a very negative and critical mindset that has a strong grip on me, the comments really are helping me wake up.

I think I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter what I think or how I feel. I just need to start taking positive action.

I don't have any big goals. I just want to stop the downward slide, get some confidence back.

Yeh little goals help for example ok I'm going to the gym 2 days this week and eating well no processed crap then the next week just build upon it every week, could be ok when I go down the street and do grocery shopping I'm gonna put my shoulders back, chest out smile and say hello to someone, next time a little more. You get the picture, just starting small and building can have a huge impact doing it on a consistent basis in a very short space of time.

 

[CigarMan]

Anybody who is reading this I just wanted to say things can get much worse than you think is possible if you let things slide in the wrong direction.

 

[CigarMan]

I sympathize with your depression and anxiety as I have suffered and do suffer every day.

But you know what, doing nothing isn't an option! You may feel down and out god knows I've been there, but the question is what steps are you going to take to change buddy?

Take antidepressants, go see a counselor to work through your issues, start executing on a business idea, socialising more, hitting the gym? What is it?

You need to do something buddy, I'm sure you have people in your life to turn to.

Pm me if you like.

Thanks. I am actually doing some of that. It helps.

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Jeff Noel]

When I came to this forum many years ago I was a very different person and in a much better place than I am now..

I even had a couple well know members offer to help me out to get started but ran away because I was scared and had a comfortable life.

Fast forward many years later... I lost my job, life sucks and depressed. A job can disappear so don't be lazy.

So remember wasting time and giving up can have risks.

Good luck.

PM @Timmy1990 . This man knows what you're living and can really help. Even though he deals with depression, the man is my biggest inspiration lately. His progress is mind blowing.

Stay strong.

Also, have you read The Millionaire Fastlane ? If you have it, look at pages around ~160-180. There's a part about choices. How we make them, how to deal with big decisions and so on. I read that this morning and it changed my view on how to tackle the day.

Edit: Make a list (written or mentally) of your skillset. What can you do ? What can you do (legally) that can drive small amounts of money in your pocket today or tomorrow ? Lawn mowing, window washing, shoveling, car detailing, etc. I'm just throwing ideas in the air.

I always thought I wasn't good enough to be an independant IT Tech. Turns out I could do that right now. There's a lot of aunts, grandmas and mothers (yes, huge stereotype) that don't know anything about tech and need their PC to get faster or to get cleaned up.

 

[windchaser]

When I came to this forum many years ago I was a very different person and in a much better place than I am now..

I even had a couple well know members offer to help me out to get started but ran away because I was scared and had a comfortable life.

Fast forward many years later... I lost my job, life sucks and depressed. A job can disappear so don't be lazy.

So remember wasting time and giving up can have risks.

Good luck.

I feel you, maybe not depression but I was in a very dark place a year ago and it took a strong waking call for me to move forward. Then, I got comfortable and when I less expected lost my job and a very special person in my life in the same week. But, through attitude I managed to turn adversity into opportunity. Feel free to PM me if you think it could help you

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[TonyStark]

Take it as a learning experience. Your life sucks now because the actions of before weren’t enough to sustain you in the future.

You need to go back and plan, reorganize, and get started on a new trajectory in life.

 

[Rhino]

You’re only ‘down and out’ if you don’t get back up...

When I went through a similar period I realised that I’d stopped doing all the little things that contributed towards my previous successes. Small actions compound over time so it can have a dramatic effect in the long run. You need to start doing the little things that are in your control, start with the small wins and build from there. If you can, try and use how you’re feeling now as motivation to pull yourself out the doldrums. It took about 18 months for me but I’m all the better for it now

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[Empire]

When I came to this forum many years ago I was a very different person and in a much better place than I am now..

I even had a couple well know members offer to help me out to get started but ran away because I was scared and had a comfortable life.

Fast forward many years later... I lost my job, life sucks and depressed. A job can disappear so don't be lazy.

So remember wasting time and giving up can have risks.

Good luck.

Dude I feel what you are going through.
I am actually going through similar thoughts myself and have had a lot of positive help from members of this forum.

You are so right about wasting time and giving up.
I was actually hanging on a thread before posting to FLF. I needed some direction and a few members have made suggestions to help me.
Hopefully the same will happen for you too here.

I wish I could provide you with some good advice but I am not fully mentally "in a good place" at the moment myself. I will say that I am with you on this. You mentioned that you have been in a good place before and so there is no reason why you cannot fight to get there again.

Keep at it!

 

Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

[RazorCut]

I think I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter what I think or how I feel. I just need to start taking positive action.

I don't have any big goals. I just want to stop the downward slide, get some confidence back.

Maybe create an action diary. Doesn't matter how big or how small the action is just as long at it is a move forward not backwards. Like @Timmy1990 says eat some good meals, promise yourself you will go to the gym a couple of times a week. In fact exercise is well know for improving mental health as it releases endorphins. Even walking will have a positive effect on endorphin release plus walking in the countryside or park itself is a great way of getting an energy boost and improving your mood etc..

Small steps can take you long distances, you just have to put that first foot in front of the other.

_

 

[Evil_Jester]

I went out to a meetup.com thing last night. Socializing makes you feel 100% alive, gives clarity, and motivation. Try it out, go to a meetup with the only intention of showing up

 

[CigarMan]

I went out to a meetup.com thing last night. Socializing makes you feel 100% alive, gives clarity, and motivation. Try it out, go to a meetup with the only intention of showing up

Thanks I will give it a try. I may do some volunteer work too just to get out of the house. I will see how things are in 1 week... right now going cold Turkey on the weed, alcohol and junk food my brain is fried mostly from lack of sleep.

 

[Timmy C]

This is exactly what I am doing.

Having a hard time sleeping without the weed an alcohol so I am exhausted.

Got rid of all the junk food. Went shopping this morning at 8am. Usually I just things delivered. Decided on a keto diet but with some fruit.. so call it low carb.

Someone suggested meditation. I did 40 mins, seems pointless to me but I will give it 90 days.

I did 1 hour the exercise bike and went 19.3 mikes.

Monday I am thinking I will get my car fixed... not exactly sure why but I always had a car.

As for skills I can develop. I have had lots of success as a trader in the past. Not sure I want to go that way because I am having a hard time engaging at the required level. I never did this for a living before so maybe the pressure will be too much... but I have consistently made money trading before I became depressed.

Mate I was exactly where you are a year ago, stoner to much alcohol the whole package. You can and will get through it.

You've got this man, it's good to see you taking action.