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Don't Expect That 2021 Will Be Better

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MTF

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A lot of people can't wait for 2020 to end, as if all it takes to “fix” it is to get a new calendar.

Yay, 2021! I can finally forget about that big, bad, 2020!

For many, 2020 wasn’t anywhere close to what they would consider a “good” year. But it wasn’t bad because of its inherent nature. It was bad because of the personal judgment of those people.

When we judge events based on whether they unfold according to our tastes, we’re walking on the most unstable land there is. It’s the land of basing our inner world on the external factors. And it’s the land upon which we can’t exert any control.

What if 2020 just was? Wouldn’t it be more pleasant if we chose to experience it as it was, with no judgment?

I wasn’t great at surrendering to 2020. I wrestled with the world for the great majority of the year. I was angry at the politicians, at the taken decisions, and at the people who opposed my views. With an unstable mind, I made many bad decisions.

I myself made 2020 a hell. In hindsight (fueled by a 18-day 60-minute meditation streak), I can now also say that 2020 was a great year. I lived for five months in the tropics (couldn’t find a better place to be stranded at!). I traveled for most of the year. I learned a lot of lessons I couldn’t have learned without all that unfurled this year.

Don't expect that 2021 will be better. Expect—no, promise yourself— that you will be better at not judging external circumstances to be good or bad. As Michael A. Singer says, “You gain nothing by being bothered by life’s events. It doesn’t change the world; you just suffer.”

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I originally posted this article on my blog but thought it could be very relevant to many people on the forum. I strongly, strongly recommend meditation and checking out Michael A. Singer's stuff. It's been changing my life.
 

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MJ DeMarco

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Raoul Duke

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A narrow lens.

Ask yourself this question.

The things that you do. The people you follow. Are looking at everything through a narrow lens.

Would you not do the same?

Grab yourself a wider lens.
 

Think Expand

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Wow! Nice thread. I wrote a blog post on December 26, 2017, which is now ranking on the first page of Google when you search for " How to prepare for a successful new year". What you just said goes exactly with it.

Here is the intro:

As we move on to cross over into the New Year, there’s a high adrenaline rush for new opportunities, breakthroughs, and successes. We sort of think, “Next year, we will achieve more and become more successful.”

But as we all know, success doesn’t come by accident. Success comes through a process. And until you follow the process, you’ll never achieve success, no matter who you are. Also, success does not come to those who wish for it, it comes to those who work for it.

To have a Happy New Year, you have to work for it. A Happy New Year is not just a slogan!

A big part of the work is PREPARATION. As they say in business, “Effective preparation prevents poor performance.” If you don’t prepare effectively for a Happy New Year, don’t expect to have a Happy New Year!
Many people think because it is a new year, everything will be happy. That’s a lie. I repeat, “If you don’t prepare effectively for a Happy New Year, don’t expect to have a Happy New Year!

And a lot of time, we get so much enthusiasm about the New Year euphoria that we ill prepare for the New Year. Then, at the end of the year, we realize that the year was not as happy as we wish it to be. No, it’s not the year. It is because we haven’t prepared well for it.
 

knazzaro710

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Great thread with a great mindset towards this year, could not agree more.

People who are most excited for this year to be over are looking for something to blame their misery on, and think a new year will automatically take that misery away.

Yes, this year has been less convenient than others in the past and has had pretty horrific events happen, but they shouldn't define the whole year. If you think of this year as a wasted time, you are discounting a whole 365 DAYS OF YOUR LIFE as a waste. While waiting for this year to be over, people may have missed opportunities that this year could have brought.

For me personally, being stuck at home allowed me the time to achieve things, take up skills, and read books that all ended up being pretty life-changing. I actually found entrepreneurship, developed that interest, and began my journey during quarantine, so this year actually had quite a huge positive impact on my life that I'm incredibly thankful for.

The way I see it, yes, this year brought about a lot of pain and suffering, probably more than years past, but there was still an opportunity to grow and achieve the goal. If someone is unsatisfied with this year and think a new year will better allow dreams to be fulfilled, think again. A new year won't change anything with the same attitudes and fixed mindset. Success comes from action and perseverance.

With that being said, I hope everyone has a Happy New Year and continues to crush it :)
 
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sparechange

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I thought 2020 was pretty awesome, hoping 21 will be even better, feels like it went by to fast though!

Happy NY everyone, hope you all are doing great.
 

MTF

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Great take, couldn't have said it better myself.



+1

Thank you!

A narrow lens.

Ask yourself this question.

The things that you do. The people you follow. Are looking at everything through a narrow lens.

Would you not do the same?

Grab yourself a wider lens.

Or throw away the lens and just look :)

No, it’s not the year. It is because we haven’t prepared well for it.

I'd say it's not even preparation, it's just how we choose to see it. You can be prepared and still suffer through your own choice to interpret things this way.

Yes, this year has been less convenient than others in the past and has had pretty horrific events happen, but they shouldn't define the whole year.

Just wanted to point out that "horrific" is also a judgment. Obviously, losing a loved one is horrific indeed, but many things in our lives are horrific only because we judge them to be so, not because that's their nature. Reminds me of:

There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically.


“Maybe,” the farmer replied.


The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed.


“Maybe,” replied the old man.


The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy for what they called his “misfortune.”


“Maybe,” answered the farmer.


The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son's leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out.


“Maybe,” said the farmer.


I thought 2020 was pretty awesome, hoping 21 will be even better, feels like it went by to fast though!

Happy NY everyone, hope you all are doing great.

What if 2020 wasn't pretty awesome but just was? Without "awesome" there's no "horrible." So each year could just be what it is instead of being on this wild ride where one year we decide it's awesome and the next we decide it's bad.

In 2020, I finally turned the corner in a lot of areas of my life. It was a banner year. Yes, there may be a recession in 2021. If it raises its nasty head, I'm ready.

Even a recession is ultimately just another event in life. As in, an event, period. Not a bad or a good thing. Simply a thing. The name is just a label that makes many people unnecessarily suffer and/or blame their suffering on it.
 

Ing

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Parts of 2020 were the best Time of my Life.
The only bad thing about 2020 for me was the closure of the sports facilities I use.

The economic part was great for me.

We will get over the Covid19 madness anyhow and than the next hog will come along.

btw: Happy New Year
 

Raja

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Sorry to reply this negative on new year, but recession is already here(government announced it), we just don't realise its impact yet.

And when you combine it it unemployment, business bankruptcy, getting sick, public fear when they got to know the extent of loss they it caused and the scale of this global event(2008 us recession didn't affect many countries, like india)

Also its compounding and becoming worst
there may be a recession in 2021


On positive note, there will be opportunity for investors so hustle hard and lets save some money for future investments.
 
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Fiza Hanif

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Great words @MTF! Michael A. Singer's teachings have changed my life too!

I recently read Singer's second book "The Surrender Experiment" (Thanks @MJ DeMarco for recommending me the book) and took his course "Living from a place of Surrender". It has been a very deep journey so far.

He is truly one of the best spiritual teachers out there and a beautiful human being. I have read in-depth his book "The Untethered Soul" about 4 or 5 times now. Every time I read it it just blows my mind. His teachings are filled with truth, harmony, and peace. Yet they are very easy and intuitive to understand.

One of the things that I like the most about Singer's teachings is: work on yourself to be free from your "personal melodrama", so when you step into the world, your intentions will be to raise every moment that is passing in front of you. Instead of judging it and trying to manipulate it so, you can feel comfortable inside.

I highly recommend his books and his talks/interviews to everyone who is reading this post. They will make you a better and peaceful human being.

"The types of events that would have destroyed you in the past can come and go, leaving you perfectly centered and peaceful. You can be fine, deep inside, even in the face of a deep sense of loss."
-Transcending the tendency to close, The Untethered Soul.

Happy new year!
 

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MTF

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@Fiza Hanif, great summary - thank you for posting that. I'm slowly finishing The Surrender Experiment (72% now). Still need to check the course. Even though it's been just a few days of more conscious living, combined with meditation for the past 19 days, I'm beginning to see a "new world" out there. His work is helpful because it summarizes and easily explains what people spent thousands of years philosophizing about.
 

MJ DeMarco

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His work is helpful because it summarizes and easily explains what people spent thousands of years philosophizing about.

Yes, including various religious figures ... when evaluated as a whole, stripped of religious dogma, it sounds like they are all talking about the same thing.
 

WJK

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Yes, including various religious figures ... when evaluated as a whole, stripped of religious dogma, it sounds like they are all talking about the same thing.
All humans want the same things. They want a safe place to living and raise their families. They want the respect of their peers. And, they want their children to do better than they have done. It's universal.
 

c4n

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Don't want to derail the thread, but I am sure most of you have heard of Abraham Maslow who explained/ranked human needs; these are universal: Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
 

Matua

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2020 was really rough for me, but it opened the doors of entrepreneurship and mainly following your own path. But once I accepted the latter, I couldn't have been more happier and freer to make my own choices than following a scripted path.
 

ivmarkov1992@gma

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2020 was eye opening for me, I changed a lot of bad habits and created new ones. I had a lot of problems with anxiety at the beginning of the year and I managed to handle it. I now sleep like a baby. So 2020 regarding my personal development was the best year so far. If we look at my business it was not so god, at least the tourist part of it, since we have a small family hotel In Croatia that I manage. But in some other business we started doing progress so all in all not so bad. 2021 will rock for me, because I won't let it be bad.

It is up to you how your year will be, there will always be some virus or crisis or something, but that shouldn't stop us.
 

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