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GOLD! Because I Can

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Vigilante

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I thought you guys and gals might get a kick out of a quick "fast lane" exchange I had today.

I stopped by my office, which is about a 9 iron away from Best Buy's corporate office.

Someone stopped by my office while I was there, and asked me if I would help them on something. Something that they... as an employee of someone else's company... was tasked with accomplishing. Could I have done it? Yep. Could they do it without my (uncompensated) help? Yep.

"Sorry. I'm leaving in 5 minutes and can't help you." I said.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"Home" I said.

"At noon? Why?" she asked.

"Because I can. That's the difference between you and me."

She knew exactly what I was talking about.

She looked at the decanter of Jim Beam Black that I keep on a shelf in my office.

"Why do you have that here?" she asked.

"Because I can. That's the difference between you and me. That decanter represents my ability to do what ever the hell I want. And you can't. And that's freedom to me." (I seldom if ever drink from that decanter, by the way. It's more symbolic for me than practical. But I can...)

She left, and went back to the cubicle that had been assigned to her by her employer.

I left, and went home and played with my 7 month old baby.

You could come back to the office 5 years from now... and either she or someone exactly like her will still be occupying that cubicle.

Blaze your own path.
 

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Kak

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LOVE IT!!! I totally get where you are coming from. I recently am having a problem finding friends to golf with, you guessed it, they are all at work.
 
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Vigilante

Vigilante

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you sound rude, just to rub it in her face.

she ask the wrong questions though.
She stopped by my office... to ask me to do her work for her... for free. She doesn't work for me. Was it rude for her to ask me to do something for her for free? Either way, it doesn't matter as you strike me as the type of person that is likely on the "ask" side of this equation.

She got a free business lesson instead. What I gave her is worth more than what she asked me for.

Save your etiquette lessons for someone else.
 

ALSL

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you sound rude, just to rub it in her face.

she ask the wrong questions though.
The words alone may be rude. However, you weren't there to hear his tone of voice, which is huge.
Regardless of whether or not he's rude, pointing that out doesn't seem to really add anything to the discussion. For a business forum, I don't really think personality traits that do not contribute to/deter business and financial success should be the focus here.

Vigilante was bringing up a situation and a conversation that he may or may not have had and may or may not have simply paraphrased in order to show the newer members and people who are thinking of becoming entrepreneurs what someone who HAS freedom could be qualified to say.

It's more of a motivational thing and should be seen as such.
 

Lights

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She stopped by my office... to ask me to do her work for her... for free. She doesn't work for me. And I get nothing for helping her but being a good guy. You have no idea Lights if what she asked me to do would have taken me 5 minutes, or 5 hours. You didn't ask when you made your value judgment. You just decided that I had something that she needed, and not giving it to her was rude. Was it rude for her to ask me to do something for her for free? Either way, it doesn't matter as you strike me as the type of person that is likely on the "ask" side of this equation. It could have been you stopping by for all I know.

She got a free business lesson instead. What I gave her is worth more than what she asked me for.

Save your etiquette lessons for someone else.

If you are astute enough to absorb the scene, you would know it wasn't the first time she had "stopped by" for "help."

And it won't be the last.
Oh, no. The part of helping her isn't rude. I would had told her leave me alone.

Just saying, "that's the difference between you and me". I wouldn't rub that in her face. But whatever, it doesn't matter, she deserve it which is why I said she ask the wrong questions.
 
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"Leave me alone" sounds rude to me. That wouldn't help her.

I would prefer to give her a perspective to set her mind free. She got more than she asked for.

She made a comment or two about the great life that we have (we're Facebook friends) and this was yet another piece of the puzzle for her.

And please reread and notice that the answers I gave were in response to questions that she asked.
 
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MJ's lambo --- to him --- was freedom. It was less about the car, and more about the symbolism. Not a symbol to the world --- but a physical representation to him privately --- that he had made it. He built it. He could --- buy --- a ---- Lambo.

The external world didn't understand his perspective on it, I bet. That wasn't important. How do I know that it was just a symbol of freedom to him? When he decided to... he got rid of it. It was just a car to him at that point.

He didn't need to apologize for it. Some people would look at his Lambo with envy... and those are slow laners. They'll never have one. Some would look at his Lambo and get motivation... and those people some day may be driving one of their own. MJ's Lambo meant the American dream is still real. Two different people could look at the same car and draw two different conclusions as to how it applied to them. Welcome to America.

And I'm not apologetic for my direct answers to her direct questions if you can see the (smaller scale) parallel.
 
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Vigilante was bringing up a situation and a conversation that he may or may not have had and may or may not have simply paraphrased in order to show the newer members and people who are thinking of becoming entrepreneurs what someone who HAS freedom could be qualified to say.
Glad you are tracking with my thought process. Definitely paraphrased. It really happened, but it was hopefully more inspiring and less demeaning than the words look on the printed page.
 

EN_VY

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As a person who works in IT, people always try and get free advice/work from me. After reading TMF and joining these forums, I now see how time is the most important asset I have. No longer doing it unless I'm compensated financially.

Oh and some people would even complain about free advice/work. :banghead: The nerve.

Sent from my iOS powered Android.
 
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Bar none... if you remember nothing else from this thread...

(and this wasn't the point of the discussion, but...)

time is the single most important asset that you own.

There are dozens of people that want to "bounce their ideas" off of entrepreneurs. Usually what that means is they hope you will work for them, or their idea, or chase their dreams with them.

To most clock punchers, an entrepreneur is unemployed. I went home at noon today, so I should volunteer my time to their project. (By the way, they are sleeping when you are on the phone with Asia at 2AM, and they're in their pajamas sipping mimosas while you are in your warehouse Saturday morning at 6AM taking inventory... but nobody sees that.) Most people assume you're their free career coach. 99% of them are either moochers or action fakers. The 1% that are action takers reveal themselves as such over time.

Protect your time. Absolutely volunteer your time to worthwhile efforts including teaching people... but on YOUR schedule.

The single most important factor that larger companies don't get is how much time is wasted in non-productive meetings, in singing happy birthday to Patty from seven cubicles over, or in recapping business analysis that is never read by anyone.

Entrepreneurs.. guard your time. That's why you can do more in 2 hours than most "employees" can do in a day.
 

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Jamillah

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time is the single most important asset that you own.

There are dozens of people that want to "bounce their ideas" off of entrepreneurs. Usually what that means is they hope you will work for them, or their idea, or chase their dreams with them.

To most clock punchers, an entrepreneur is unemployed. I went home at noon today, so I should volunteer my time to their project. Most people assume you're their free career coach. 99% of them are either moochers or action fakers. The 1% that are action takers reveal themselves as such over time.

Protect your time. Absolutely volunteer your time to worthwhile efforts including teaching people... but on YOUR schedule.

The single most important factor that larger companies don't get is how much time is wasted in non-productive meetings, in singing happy birthday to Patty from seven cubicles over, or in recapping business analysis that is never read by anyone.

Entrepreneurs.. guard your time. That's why you can do more in 2 hours than most "employees" can do in a day.
Well said! Love it and agree 100% :D
 

j3m4090

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I would've thrown a stack of money at her and said puff be gone xD...nah you did the right thing. Its just funny looking at the other persons face when you give them advice and they don't even realize it.
 

Gold777

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Yeah it was honestly a total dick move to say it in the way you did, BUT I love it. Because sometimes it's exactly what people need. She'll either get three things out of that, Anger, Epiphany, or Nothing.

The "I can do whatever the hell I want and you can't" was the most rude thing you said IF you said it that way. However, maybe if you did try to lecture to her she wouldn't have tried to stick around to listen, or wouldn't have cared.

So I don't blame you at all for putting it the way you did nor do I think it's wrong, it's just another slap in the face by reality.
 
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It's a jarring mindset for people sometimes that they live in a prison of their own making.

You --- don't --- have --- to --- live --- like --- that.
 

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Bar none... if you remember nothing else from this thread...

(and this wasn't the point of the discussion, but...)

time is the single most important asset that you own.

There are dozens of people that want to "bounce their ideas" off of entrepreneurs. Usually what that means is they hope you will work for them, or their idea, or chase their dreams with them.

To most clock punchers, an entrepreneur is unemployed. I went home at noon today, so I should volunteer my time to their project. (By the way, they are sleeping when you are on the phone with Asia at 2AM, and they're in their pajamas sipping mimosas while you are in your warehouse Saturday morning at 6AM taking inventory... but nobody sees that.) Most people assume you're their free career coach. 99% of them are either moochers or action fakers. The 1% that are action takers reveal themselves as such over time.

Protect your time. Absolutely volunteer your time to worthwhile efforts including teaching people... but on YOUR schedule.

The single most important factor that larger companies don't get is how much time is wasted in non-productive meetings, in singing happy birthday to Patty from seven cubicles over, or in recapping business analysis that is never read by anyone.

Entrepreneurs.. guard your time. That's why you can do more in 2 hours than most "employees" can do in a day.
One of the best posts on this forum
 

theDarkness

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Yeah, you sound like a complete a$$ in that post. I get that some context here may be missing. It sounds like she probably prompted you to speak about your lifestyle and how you got there more than the initial post lets on. And you're Facebook friends so maybe she's been curious about it in the past. But just as it is presented, two separate unprompted instances of "that's the difference between me and you" - pass. Not my cup of tea.

Not that I'm against being a little brusque. I am dreadfully efficient and cold and all-business when it comes to dealing with situations where people want to crap all over your productivity, or where they're assuming that your time is infinite/worthless and that you can help them with every little thing. 1) I can't help you and 2) get out please. You have to defend assaults on your time.

Plus I now have my wife, who will gladly breathe actual fire on anyone not respecting my time. You do not mess with Latin women. :nono:
 
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Let's look at two approaches.

1. She asked me how I was able to leave at noon (when I got there at 10am) because she lives strapped to her cubicle married to her time card. I gave her a shot of water to the face.
2. She asked me why I had a Madman drink setup in my office. She got the reality of the answer to her question... because I can.

Now lets look at the collective approach of several critics on the thread.
1) I can't help you and
2) get out please.

In the long run, who might you guess she would find to be the a**hole and who would you guess gave her more life?
 
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One more aspect of "workers" that they don't get about entrepreneurs...

They are "at work" when they are sitting in their cubicle. Entrepreneurs are "at work" in their car, at dinner, and walking through a mall. We're not confined to time that is quantifiable on a time card.

That is a hard mindset to grasp for people who trade their time for time based compensation.
 

theDarkness

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Let's look at two approaches.

1. She asked me how I was able to leave at noon (when I got there at 10am) because she lives strapped to her cubicle married to her time card. I gave her a shot of water to the face.
2. She asked me why I had a Madman drink setup in my office. She got the reality of the answer to her question... because I can.

Now lets look at the collective approach of several critics on the thread.
1) I can't help you and
2) get out please.

In the long run, who might you guess she would find to be the a**hole and who would you guess gave her more life?
My approach respects her ability to make decisions for herself. She doesn't need to know things about my personal life, and I don't need to know about hers. She asks a question she gets a simple no-BS answer. If she lingers I make it clear that she has overstayed her welcome.

Your approach needlessly injects yourself into her personal life, makes judgments regarding her lifestyle, and sets yourself up as someone trying to "convert" her into this other way of thinking. If you know her well enough maybe that's fine--because you can make that judgement call and try to help a friend--but in general I find it's better to respect a person's agency.
 

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Kak

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One more aspect of "workers" that they don't get about entrepreneurs...

They are "at work" when they are sitting in their cubicle. Entrepreneurs are "at work" in their car, at dinner, and walking through a mall. We're not confined to time that is quantifiable on a time card.

That is a hard mindset to grasp for people who trade their time for time based compensation.
You are absolutely right. The employee prefers to escape EVERYTHING work related as soon as their time is up. They go party, drink, and watch American Idol. The entrepreneur is always thinking about ways to do things better. I have honestly thought about a new sales approach while 60 feet under water diving a barrier reef on vacation to the Caribbean.
 

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I remember Russ's posts where he emphasizes time spent vs time projected and wasted. People would come and complain about lack of time. (and results, but NOT effort)

"Oh, I need to find this info and this one.. poor me how long would that take"

Russ - "This would take 5 minutes. Next?!"


"Oh, I spent the day looking up XYZ online"

Russ - "This would take 30 mins. Next?!"



We fake ourselves, lie to yourselves, and are lied to, by ourselves. That's why Vig's message is refreshing. It's the truth to such a person.
 
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:: look at me making all these new friends right before B&P ::

:cheers:
 

Kak

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Powerful.
The truth, no matter how cold, hard, or bitter, is the best advice/motivation you can give.
And that attitude, Kidd, is why after reading just a few of your posts I am sure you will make it some day. Thanks for your post. Glad you are here.
 

Deanna

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Bar none... if you remember nothing else from this thread...

(and this wasn't the point of the discussion, but...)

time is the single most important asset that you own.

There are dozens of people that want to "bounce their ideas" off of entrepreneurs. Usually what that means is they hope you will work for them, or their idea, or chase their dreams with them.

To most clock punchers, an entrepreneur is unemployed. I went home at noon today, so I should volunteer my time to their project. (By the way, they are sleeping when you are on the phone with Asia at 2AM, and they're in their pajamas sipping mimosas while you are in your warehouse Saturday morning at 6AM taking inventory... but nobody sees that.) Most people assume you're their free career coach. 99% of them are either moochers or action fakers. The 1% that are action takers reveal themselves as such over time.

Protect your time. Absolutely volunteer your time to worthwhile efforts including teaching people... but on YOUR schedule.

The single most important factor that larger companies don't get is how much time is wasted in non-productive meetings, in singing happy birthday to Patty from seven cubicles over, or in recapping business analysis that is never read by anyone.

Entrepreneurs.. guard your time. That's why you can do more in 2 hours than most "employees" can do in a day.
Wow, thanks Vigilante...well said.
About a year ago I put a halt to everyone gobbling up all my time...they think I sit around doing nothing and so should be able to chase all their ideas and "help" them.

Now, they just think I'm mean and not compassionate. (Sadly its a lot of family too).
 

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At one point in my life I would have been offended by your post. I would have suggested spending time with her to teach and show her the way. I'm slowly learning to accept that nobody is out there just looking out for my best interest. Tuff love with a real message will make those who want it stronger. Those who don't get it, probably won't help much.

I have been her before. Asking people more successful how it's done, for help. The more I learn on my own, the more respect I have for others (what they have accomplished and their time) that are successful because I am starting to understand how much effort they have put forth to get where they are.
 

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