Lex DeVille
Sweeping Shadows From Dreams
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Everyone has limiting beliefs. Everyone makes excuses sometimes. Yet some are only limited by their beliefs momentarily, while others are held back for years, even forever, from the outcomes they want. And even though people try to point out your limiting beliefs, you ignore them because you know yourself better than anyone... you think.
But it's hard to recognize your own demons even when you've faced them before. So I'm curious what is your process for identifying this dream-eating, soul-crushing monster when you're basically blind to it? My process is below for anyone who is curious.
Limiting Beliefs & Excuses
Limiting beliefs are revealed through excuses, and those excuses result from a missing "how" part of the equation.
I am here. I want to be over there. But I don't know how to get from here to there. THEREFORE it must not be possible.
Only the conclusion is flawed.
And if you replace the "don't know how" part with different information, then the conclusion changes.
I am here. I want to be over there. I can cross this bridge to get from here to there. THEREFORE I must cross this bridge to reach my destination.
This assumes that a bridge exists and that you notice that bridge.
But what happens when you don't notice the bridge, or worse, it doesn't exist? Then you are back where you started. You lack the "how" piece again. So the only possible conclusion MUST be to quit, turnaround, go home, because you cannot continue this way... can you?
If it were me, and I did not notice a bridge, or a bridge did not exist in this place, then I would not turn around just yet. I would ask HOW can I go forward anyway? Can I build a bridge? A rope swing? Can I fly across? Catapult myself? I would identify possible options, determine which option I like best, and then ask, HOW can I create this? HOW can I make this happen?
"How" naturally leads into "where" can I start? "What" tools, supplies, or knowledge might I need? "Who" could help me do this?
But I think many more people just ask, "Why? Why is this terrible thing happening to me?"
My Process for Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
I don't know what I don't know, and I'm not better at seeing limiting beliefs than anyone else. I also don't know the limitations of what is possible in general, or even what is possible for me. Since all of these unknowns exist, then the only approach that makes sense to me is to assume that ANYTHING is possible.
If I assume anything is possible, then it means that ANY excuse is automatically bullshit. In other words, it is a limiting belief, and I only have to figure out HOW to overcome it.
So my approach to overcoming limiting beliefs is just to assume that I can do anything and that the only reason I can't has nothing to do with possibilities, and everything to do with a lack of "HOW" information that needs to be filled in so that I can go forward.
By operating like this, then any failures are never a result of limiting beliefs. They can only be a result of choice. If solving the HOW piece completes the equation and provides an alternative conclusion, then, once I figure out HOW something works, I must either choose to pursue it or not.
One flaw in this approach might be that some people are not equipped to solve the "HOW" piece of their problem. I view this as only another excuse fueling a hidden limiting belief. If you are not equipped with the (knowledge, tools, connections etc.) then you return to the "HOW" question to solve that piece too. HOW can you solve this new problem so you can continue onward to solve the other problem?
To me, it always comes down to choice.
I can determine that there are too many "how" questions to be answered and choose to pursue a different goal (but I could also ask "how" can I decrease the number of "how" questions). Or I can choose to pursue this goal anyway and work through each of those problems one at a time. In any case, it is always only a choice that stops me from continuing. It is never really the excuses that I'd like to tell myself about why something is not possible.
So yeah, that's my process. I'm curious if others do something differently. How do you identify your own limiting beliefs and how do you overcome them? Maybe someone else will find that useful for their journey too.
But it's hard to recognize your own demons even when you've faced them before. So I'm curious what is your process for identifying this dream-eating, soul-crushing monster when you're basically blind to it? My process is below for anyone who is curious.
Limiting Beliefs & Excuses
Limiting beliefs are revealed through excuses, and those excuses result from a missing "how" part of the equation.
I am here. I want to be over there. But I don't know how to get from here to there. THEREFORE it must not be possible.
Only the conclusion is flawed.
And if you replace the "don't know how" part with different information, then the conclusion changes.
I am here. I want to be over there. I can cross this bridge to get from here to there. THEREFORE I must cross this bridge to reach my destination.
This assumes that a bridge exists and that you notice that bridge.
But what happens when you don't notice the bridge, or worse, it doesn't exist? Then you are back where you started. You lack the "how" piece again. So the only possible conclusion MUST be to quit, turnaround, go home, because you cannot continue this way... can you?
If it were me, and I did not notice a bridge, or a bridge did not exist in this place, then I would not turn around just yet. I would ask HOW can I go forward anyway? Can I build a bridge? A rope swing? Can I fly across? Catapult myself? I would identify possible options, determine which option I like best, and then ask, HOW can I create this? HOW can I make this happen?
"How" naturally leads into "where" can I start? "What" tools, supplies, or knowledge might I need? "Who" could help me do this?
But I think many more people just ask, "Why? Why is this terrible thing happening to me?"
My Process for Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
I don't know what I don't know, and I'm not better at seeing limiting beliefs than anyone else. I also don't know the limitations of what is possible in general, or even what is possible for me. Since all of these unknowns exist, then the only approach that makes sense to me is to assume that ANYTHING is possible.
If I assume anything is possible, then it means that ANY excuse is automatically bullshit. In other words, it is a limiting belief, and I only have to figure out HOW to overcome it.
So my approach to overcoming limiting beliefs is just to assume that I can do anything and that the only reason I can't has nothing to do with possibilities, and everything to do with a lack of "HOW" information that needs to be filled in so that I can go forward.
By operating like this, then any failures are never a result of limiting beliefs. They can only be a result of choice. If solving the HOW piece completes the equation and provides an alternative conclusion, then, once I figure out HOW something works, I must either choose to pursue it or not.
One flaw in this approach might be that some people are not equipped to solve the "HOW" piece of their problem. I view this as only another excuse fueling a hidden limiting belief. If you are not equipped with the (knowledge, tools, connections etc.) then you return to the "HOW" question to solve that piece too. HOW can you solve this new problem so you can continue onward to solve the other problem?
To me, it always comes down to choice.
I can determine that there are too many "how" questions to be answered and choose to pursue a different goal (but I could also ask "how" can I decrease the number of "how" questions). Or I can choose to pursue this goal anyway and work through each of those problems one at a time. In any case, it is always only a choice that stops me from continuing. It is never really the excuses that I'd like to tell myself about why something is not possible.
So yeah, that's my process. I'm curious if others do something differently. How do you identify your own limiting beliefs and how do you overcome them? Maybe someone else will find that useful for their journey too.
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