Thread: Wealth Language

Runum,

Funny you bring this up.

I actually answered this question about a week ago, in response to a different thread:

http://www.thefastlanetomillions.com...html#post49112

Lots of other things as well, but these are some examples.

Another interesting thing: Many of the super wealthy NEVER talk about how much something cost them (a car, a house, clothes, meal, etc etc etc).

They talk money all the time-- investments, acquisitions, tax strategies (lots and lots).

But they just don't talk about what they paid for consumer things.

I realize this is not an across the board thing-- it was just the folks I hung out with.

I remember being up at Lake Tahoe, sitting out on the front lawn at one of my client's parties. We were eating turkey drumsticks with our hands as the sun set.

We had an amazing view of the lake from our seats (it was on the west shore). Sitting at the table were 8 people (counting me). Two were the owners of the house. One had flown his brand new Gulfstream G IV (this was back in the early 90s, before the G 5). Another had flown in his new helicopter.

There was chatter about different ways to get places -- but NO ONE talked how much their "rides" were.

They also teased each other about their losses. "Hey Jer, you still got that 20 mil loss on the books from last year, or have you figured out what to do with it?"

****

I also remember sitting in first class with some very casually dressed folks (sweat suits). We talked about what I did (home screening rooms) and both were very interested. I kept mentioning how expensive they were (nicely, just saying things like "this one ran around $400K").

As I talked, the guy got less and less interested. Finally, when his wife wasn't listening, he looked me square in the eye and said, "Look, I think we might want to talk with you more about this stuff. But you've got to stop talking price, OK?"

I didn't understand, but said, "Sure."

We wound up talking about other things for the rest of the flight. He was a super nice guy. When we were just about to land, I noticed a humungous ring on his finger for the very first time. Seeing me looking at it, he said, "I wondered when you were going to ask me about this."

I said, "Sorry if I was staring. But that's a really big ring."

He held it up with pride and said, "That's my Broncos superbowl ring", smiling.

I nodded, and said, "I have to apologize. I really don't follow sports at all. When did you play?"

He looked at me and said, very quietly: "I'm one of the owners."

It was Pat Bowlen.

His earlier comments about me stopping talking about prices now made more sense.

-Russ H.

Originally Posted by Russ H

Another interesting thing: Many of the super wealthy NEVER talk about how much something cost them (a car, a house, clothes, meal, etc etc etc).

They talk money all the time-- investments, acquisitions, tax strategies (lots and lots).

But they just don't talk about what they paid for consumer things.

I think this depends on culture
and on what business the person is in.

I was hanging with one of the hubby's super wealthy Asian 'Uncle's
and he wanted to know what we paid for everything
from watermelon
to chocolate (Cadburys from England, yum).
Though he owns a chain of supermarkets
so this could have been his way of doing some research
but I do find that the hubby's family asks about price on everything.

HOWEVER, they also add the value component.
They're not looking for cheapest,
they're looking for best value.

Originally Posted by Venturer

So . . . I told the guy I wanted to give him something that might help him change his (financial) life. He told me when he was planning to visit the club again and I dropped by to hand him the RDPD book.

That all happened about 6 months ago.

About two weeks ago I ran into him again and he told me he had read the book and followed it up with a few RE books and that he was in the process of buying his first rental property. That simple book was the trigger for him to do something.

That really made my day.

Way cool!

Trump said in one of his books when he runs into a fellow billionaire on the golf course they mainly talk about their game. Funny how that works. He said they don't talk money. Now I would think if it was another real estate player in his area it might be different.
M&T....

Originally Posted by M&T

Trump said in one of his books when he runs into a fellow billionaire on the golf course they mainly talk about their game. Funny how that works. He said they don't talk money. Now I would think if it was another real estate player in his area it might be different.

You're absolutely right about not talking shop, but talking golf on the links.

Sorry, time for another story:

Friend of mine (owns a shopping center in Orange County worth about $40M, among other things) plays golf regularly. Actually played well enough to be on the tour, before he got terrible arthritis.

So he's playing one day, with two guys who occasionally join him. They've played as a threesome for years. All they ever talk about is RE investing, and golf.

So the two other guys are talking mergers (this was in the late 80s). Shane (my buddy) says, "Y'know, I've never asked you two what you do for a living."

The two of them look at Shane, then each other, and smile.

"I'm the CEO of Safeway" says one guy.

"I'm the CEO of Lucky stores" says the other.

Shane is completely taken off balance. He doesn't know what to say.

So he says the first thing he can think of:

"Y'know, I've shopped at both of your stores!"

(kooky as it sounds, this is a true story).

-Russ H.

Good observations Runrum. After going through the Developing you plan log here and reading Your Money or Your Life My wife and I find our dream home to be far more simple than what we had originally thought focusing on relaxing and rest as we see that as our ministry even now. we occasionally watch movies but all together feel no need for TV or for our children as well. It's actually quite liberating.

Bump up for those who have not seen it.

-Russ H.

Always trying to poke your stories in Russ? Even the one's that have already been told I'm just joking.I haven't seen this before.These are great stories and a great read. There are many languages that I can't speak. I'm trying to learn Internet marketinglish and technish these days.And that's hard enough for now

Originally Posted by Russ H

Bump up for those who have not seen it.

-Russ H.

Thanks for the bump Russ. I had forgot about this. I am learning the lesson and passing it on to my kid.

We were on a charter boat in Hawaii and there was a group that had attended a family wedding on there as well. One of the ladies of the party began making small talk with us and told us about the wedding. My teenage daughter wanted to hold up her end of the conversation and began asking questions about the costs involved. It was very obvious that this was a no no but my kid didn't pick up on the lady's body language. I changed the topic and, later, had a talk with my daughter. I explained there were many things you could talk about concerning the wedding, but cost is not considered polite with casual conversation. My kid actually thanked me and I feel this was a great lesson for her.

As I reflect over the last 2 years, I can see how my own and my family's vocabulary has changed. I can also see that the things I focus on have changed. These subtle nuances must be what the wealthy teach their children by voice and example. These small lessons are learned over many years. We adults want to compress the learning curve into a shorter time span.

Human behavior and psychology is interesting stuff.

Originally Posted by ^eagle^

Some of the things I gathered from how he and his family think were:

Assume personal responsibility
Whoever is closest to the problem has the solution
Envy is dangerous and self destructive
Find a way to afford things
It's OK to have nice things (he owned a Chrysler Prowler)
The walls have ears so be careful about saying unconstructive things and allowing rumors to spread through a company.

I like the way they think... Except for the envy being a problem bit. Being envious is a great thing, if it strives you towards excellence. Though I do agree, it's easy to act on envy in a purely destructive way.

Remember, envy and jealousy are different. Envy is wanting something someone else has. Jealousy is fear of losing something to someone else.

Wish I could comment beyond that on the rich person mentality, but I don't know any such people, personally.