Thread: I don't know what to do anymore.. should I just accept mediocrity

Every time I seem to motivate myself, it dies a few days later.
Every time I set goals, I change them a few days later.

I can't decide on what I want, I make so many plans and nothing ever happens. I've finally taken action a few times, and in each instance I attack too aggressively and end up way over my head.

I no longer know what to read. And when I do choose something I can barely focus because I'm thinking about the next thing I'm going to read.

I can't make up my mind on my fastlane vehicle(s), I'm incredibly overloaded with information that I can't make sense of. I'm so lost. It's rather pathetic that I'm going to quit before I ever really start.

I have no guidance, no support system, no idea where I'm headed, no idea what I'm doing. There are no rules, no one to be accountable to but myself, and that's no motivator. I'm starting to lose faith in myself.

Sure, I got rid of TV, but I've just replaced it with the computer. I lose track of time and spend entire days, just reading and doing nothing online.

And just as always, I'm making excuses. I'm so pissed at myself, I get this far, and for what? to quit.

In a sense, this a plea for help/guidance. I just need to know where to start. The little bit of control that I had I seem to have found in my life seems to be slipping away again.

This seems to become a pattern. I build up the motivation and the drive, I have nothing to be accountable for, and I get overloaded or quit, and watch it slip away. I skipped 4 out of 5 of my first classes already this semester in the last two days.

Life is kinda' falling apart again, and I don't know what to do.

Maybe the problem is that I should be a slowlane person with a job and blindly following other people's orders? It seems it could be better, considering I can't even follow my own. I just always thought I belonged in the fastlane... I'm not so sure anymore. But at the same time I'm not sure of anything.

I'm sorry to all who's time I've wasted when they gave me advice/suggestions etc. It truly was a waste. I'm not even so sure that I'll follow through with the advice that you'll offer me now. I'm just being honest.

Ryan

Don't lose faith. You need to stick to SOMETHING. I am very much like you in that I can lose motivation quickly and spend a lot of time reading and thinking.

No one idea will ever be perfect. There will always be flaws. Could it be the negative voices in your head telling you can't do it, that you're going to fail? I only ask because that's what happens to a lot of people I think. Pay attention to your 'self-talk'.

But back to my point, just go out and do something. You know, going out and having a job at this point in your life isn't necessarily a bad thing either, if all you do now is waste time. It can teach you to be more discipled and realize even more that it is something that you DON'T want to do for the next 50 years.

Another reason is because you may be too comfortable at this point. Get uncomfortable. Get away from creature comforts. Make it so you HAVE to provide an income in one or or another.

As I said no idea will ever be perfect and you can't think of the negatives if you really want to succeed. That and expect the work. Expect to hustle. Don't shy away from rolling up your sleeves.

Get through it man, everyone goes through down spots. Just today I didn't get SQUAT done and spent a lot of my time reading, but the whole family has come down with the flew and I slept like crap last night and I'm not exactly up to par. Am I fine with that? No, not really. That's what will keep me motivated to push forward. Maybe this is your way to push forward to, by beating yourself up a little bit. The problem here is your not focusing on one thing. By bouncing around your starting over all the time. Pick one thing and don't let your lack of motivation steer you away. Do what you have to do to get through it and when you feel better, get back to work.

Not sure what else to tell you, but a lot of this is mental and at least you want more in life than most people, which is a start. Now you just have to stop being your own biggest enemy and get to work.

I guess I'm in one of those teenage identity crisis episodes.

I can't focus because I don't know what I want to focus on.

My life is basically;

Wake up
Go to school if I feel like it (I only have class 3 days per week)
Usually just sit in front of the computer from sunrise to sunset
Eat weird combinations of food at all hours of the day
Sleep whenever the hell I feel like it (which sometimes is only the next night)

I'm sort of just rotting away on this chair, I'm sitting with horrendous posture, I cleaned the entire house yesterday and I've already dumped my stuff everywhere so it looks just the same as it did before I cleaned.

I should have been sleeping 2-3 hours ago, but as usual my mother isn't home, so no one here but me to try and figure it all out. Again excuses. The weak make excuses. I'm weak.

I hate being so honest, but at this point I have nothing to hide.

Originally Posted by maximus20895

That's exactly me too so I completely understand. We should be business partners!!!!

That would be the worst possible thing for us to do.

What I'm trying to get at, is that my life is out of control, I don't know how to get it back. The last thing I want to do, even remotely care about, is business.

I HIGHLY recommend taking a look at Tony Robbins latest video

New Year, New Life-Don’t be trapped by the calendar. Create the life you want right now. Here’s where to start.

Perfect for what you are going through, as he deals with the real issues underneath lack of motivation and success.

Actually this is sort of good. I mean it's bad that your mind is racing but you are now prepared so when something comes along and you all of a sudden say YES THIS IS IT... you will be so pumped and fired and you will force yourself to focus to execute. Right now your mind is going through a filtering process. Let it keep going. It's going through all your options. It's like letting your computer run. Don't fight it. Allow this process to occur for a while. Relax. Just say to yourself... you will let your brain go through this process for several weeks.

In the meantime sit down where it is quiet. No books, no computers, no tv, and just you and a pad of paper. Do not write on the paper for at least 30 minutes. Just have it by your side.

Then envision where you are and what you have done. Then envision where you want to be in 5 years, 10 years etc. Don't write it down yet. Envision not just where you want to be financially but who do you want to be as a person. How do you envision you will be interacting with your friends and family. What do wish to accomplish in the long term. Remember your job and investments are just tools to get you to where you want to be in life. Don't get trapped into this thing where your job is your life and make sure you love what you do because you are going to be doing this for the rest of your life bologna.

Now that you have envisioned yourself, pick up that pad of paper and write down those qualities. Maybe you have a big house, or a beach home and you are financially stable and you are taking care of family. Maybe you have a girlfriend or married. Write down what it is you want.

Then put your paper away.

Do the same thing the next day... this time adding any new qualities to your life.

Spend a week doing this. There is no hurry. It's only one week.

Let me know when you're done and we'll proceed. haha

Runum, very good post! I thoroughly enjoyed reading that.

One thing I want to say is to set a small limit\goal on an activity that you want to do today. I've (only just) started to try this with writing a book and setting a minimum of writing 500 words for it a day. This has been something that I've considered doing for a while but until I had an end point for the day the task seemed way too big to tackle. Setting a point I can stop (and honestly 500 words isn't that much) makes the task seem very do-able and over time this small goal turns into something big.

Try it with anything, even if you don't see it as something that'll be profitable. Right now before you pursue anything to bring in money you need to get it out of your head that you stop on anything after a week. This will help you progress into that!

Originally Posted by Lamboman350K

One more thing- Take a day off, when you actually can. On a weekend lets say, and seperate yourself from the outside world. Find a spot in nature, it could be a park, it could be a forest, but spend an day there in complete silence. Just Think. Think about your goals, your ideas and probems. Nature is great way to get away from it all and create a fresh start for yourself.

++SPEEED

You will be amazed at how clearer your mind comes if you spend time in nature. It is easy to get caught up in the whirlwind. Heck I still do from time to time. I have to step back a bit, go for a nice long walk in the woods, maybe find a rock to sit on that overlooks a nice view maybe.

OMG I hate lamborghinis!

So, I'm in the process of watching the Tony Robbins video that John posted, and he was talking about having goals that should excite you and that you would have that burning desire to pursue. I stopped the video to ponder what he was saying and I realised that one of my biggest and most costly goals was a lamborghini/ferrari...and it hit me that I don't care about either one of those!

Delving into my feelings deeper, I noticed that I pretty much hate all cars. Why? Because I find them restricting, and impossibly hard to maneuver around traffic.

Even I didn't expect what happened next... I LOVE motorcycles. The freedom, the maneuverability, the vulnerability... having your girlfriend squeeze you just a little bit tighter around the waist when you accelerate...priceless.

So here I am, absolutely shocked that I am 1000000000000000x (infinitely) more excited about having the goal of owning a $10,000 motorcycle, compared to a $300,000 car. That's just crazy!

I have yet to think of a viable reason for why I would want to own an expensive car, and I doubt I will...and it feels great!!!!!!

So now I can put aside that huge hurdle, as owning a luxury car does not even get me close to excited. In fact I couldn't care less.

I've never taken time for myself like this, just to think about what I WANT out of MY life. I've always thought I wanted extremely expensive things, but as it turns out, that's not who I am... (I seriously can't believe it, and I can't convey how good this feels)

These are the things that get me truly excited;

-Reading good books
-Spending quality time with friends
-Spending quality time with girlfriends (I'm not a player...I just don't have one at the moment lol)
-Exercise: Parkour, Martial Arts, Tricking
-Poker
-Motorcycles
-SeaDoos
-Ariel Atom (Legal street race car...$50K)
-Dancing silly and singing terribly to music (Ie I like to make people laugh)
-Watching cool/inspiring movies
-Being out in nature (I went hiking with friends in the summer time...had soooo much fun and yet haven't done it since, even though there was a few more months without snow)
-Walking/playing on the beach

I realized also that the prospect of a huge house or penthouse doesn't really excite me. If I live in a house that's less than 1000 sq. ft. I'd truly be just as happy. I don't want to spend my time indoors anyway, I want to live and experience all that I can.

This is really awesome, as the things that truly get me excited (that I posted above) don't actually cost that much money. Whereas my old "goal" (that had little thought put into it) was $15,000,000 in assets to put into passive income, I realize that to TRULY be happy, I won't need even 1/2 of that! Probably not even 1/4!

So what I'm saying is, my new "sum" goal is going to be so much less daunting and more attainable faster.

Of course, once I do reach my goal (tentative at 3M,,,but I really need to think about it), I will still grow my money to the point where I can afford the lambos and the huge houses...but I'll already be as happy as I can be, so those toys will just be added bonuses.

This is truly awesome craziness that has just transpired.

Back to Tony