Thread: Where can I hire an accountability partner?

Hi Razwan!

If you really have that kind of money, why not hire a virtual assistant or secretary. I know sites like Elance, or Odesk have several people who work for you for as low as $4.00/hour. You can get them to do some of your work as well as monitor you and give you a boost.

I've thought about that.

I had a VA on staff for three months or so. I've realized that I want to reply to my own emails and I want to do my own research. So, I've paid him 90% for nothing (it was a package).

The problem with VAs is that most of them are monkeys. They can't think for themselves. If you give them clear instructions on what to do, they'll do it. And they are hard working monkeys.

But if you ask them to take rational decisions or to analyze this and pick up a course of action, you're out of luck.I've paid $12.50/hour to my VA (in the package) and while it was nice to have someone to help you, it wasn't that useful.

Instead, I need someone that can manage and analyze my behavior. For example, I've woke up at 08:00 instead of 07:00 today. Why? What can be done about it? It is my alarm application on the phone? Maybe if he calls me to wish me good morning will it work better? What if I change the song? Am I going to sleep too late? Too early and I'm sleeping too much?

The job is easy but it requires use of the brain. And I'll be damn if I've found anyone on oDesk or Elance with brains. I guess the good VAs don't need to bid on projects.

It depends on your assertiveness as well. How can you trust a VA to know you when they have not met you face to face or understand your personality, habits, etc. etc. If you wake up late, then you could try to make it a routine. Instead of waking up at 7:00 AM, wake up at 6:45 AM with several alarms to wake you up. Have an alarm by your bed ring you up at 6:45 AM. Have an alarm at your desk which rings a bit later. If it's truly important to you, then be responsible for it. Have a cellphone alarm, but also have an old school analog one with a buzzer that's loud enough. Trust me, when you have an alarm that you dislike badly, you tend to wake up even before it rings to shut it down.

If you want a lesson in discomfort, then take MJ for example. He left his girlfriend who was wife material, moved to a new city, and lived a life of a temporary recluse just to get there. I wish I had that kind of dedication, but then again, I don't have an idea that I can bank on. So books in the meantime.

One thing that works, and you even get paid, is to have a high paying and equally demanding client.

But that wouldn't solve the problem with rest of the projects.

I think this is more of a psychological than organizational problem. You obviously know already when you need to wake up, and what needs to be done, so having someone generically reminding you of that may even prove to be annoying.

Do you maybe take on many different tasks? I noticed that I can do anything when I'm focused, that is, I can finish any single job I immerse myself into. But when there's as few as 2 things that I have to think about at the same time, none of them gets done like it really should.

Originally Posted by RazvanRogoz

I've thought about that.

I had a VA on staff for three months or so. I've realized that I want to reply to my own emails and I want to do my own research. So, I've paid him 90% for nothing (it was a package).

The problem with VAs is that most of them are monkeys. They can't think for themselves. If you give them clear instructions on what to do, they'll do it. And they are hard working monkeys.

But if you ask them to take rational decisions or to analyze this and pick up a course of action, you're out of luck.I've paid $12.50/hour to my VA (in the package) and while it was nice to have someone to help you, it wasn't that useful.

Instead, I need someone that can manage and analyze my behavior. For example, I've woke up at 08:00 instead of 07:00 today. Why? What can be done about it? It is my alarm application on the phone? Maybe if he calls me to wish me good morning will it work better? What if I change the song? Am I going to sleep too late? Too early and I'm sleeping too much?

The job is easy but it requires use of the brain. And I'll be damn if I've found anyone on oDesk or Elance with brains. I guess the good VAs don't need to bid on projects.

Don't take this like I'm being a jerk. This is exactly how I would answer this question if it came from my brother, who is my best friend.

You've had some success in your life and if you can succeed in anything, you can succeed at everything. You don't need an accountability partner. You need a wake-up call. The reason why you woke up at 8:00 today instead of 7:00 is because you weren't strong enough to. Alarm application? Song? Dude, you're making excuses. If you want to get up at 7:00, then wake you butt up at 7:00. It has nothing to do with your phone, it's your HEAD!

I've had a couple VA's, and I don't want them to make decisions. I pay them to do what I told them to do. I want all of the decisions to be mine. I don't want a "monkey" to make decisions for me. Just delegate more tasks to them where no decisions are required and free up more of your time. Maybe they can shave an hour off of your workload and you can sleep until 8:00.

When I feel like I continuously repeat a bad habit, I go into competition mode. I challenge myself to stop as if I were playing sports or a board game. And I defeat it because I DO NOT like losing. Hope this helps light a fire.

Originally Posted by wade1mil

Don't take this like I'm being a jerk. This is exactly how I would answer this question if it came from my brother, who is my best friend.

You've had some success in your life and if you can succeed in anything, you can succeed at everything. You don't need an accountability partner. You need a wake-up call. The reason why you woke up at 8:00 today instead of 7:00 is because you weren't strong enough to. Alarm application? Song? Dude, you're making excuses. If you want to get up at 7:00, then wake you butt up at 7:00. It has nothing to do with your phone, it's your HEAD!

I've had a couple VA's, and I don't want them to make decisions. I pay them to do what I told them to do. I want all of the decisions to be mine. I don't want a "monkey" to make decisions for me. Just delegate more tasks to them where no decisions are required and free up more of your time. Maybe they can shave an hour off of your workload and you can sleep until 8:00.

When I feel like I continuously repeat a bad habit, I go into competition mode. I challenge myself to stop as if I were playing sports or a board game. And I defeat it because I DO NOT like losing. Hope this helps light a fire.

That's not entirely true, some people don't have that "fire" inside of them and it has to be awaken. And simply telling them that it's all in their head won't get that spark lit. You can't tell a drug addict that it's all in their head and expect them to stop doing drugs. They need help to stop, it's not their fault it's just a sequence of bad habits and inexperience that led them to doing what they did and what they're doing. This can apply to everything, if a football player thinks he's weak, and he really is weak. You can't tell him that him being weak is just in his head and expect him to increase his bench by 100lbs in a day. It takes a great work ethic and people who don't naturally have the right mindset and enough motivation have a much harder time of overcoming these boundaries holding them back than people like you and I.

Like he said, he doesn't need a life coach, but you're right he does need a wake up call, but unfortunately he can't wake his self up. Many of us can't wake ourselves up physically and mentally, and that's why we have alarm clocks and motivational factors in our lives. Not only does this guy need someone who can help him fix his mistakes and get on track, but he also needs that person to be able to tell him exactly WHY he's making those mistakes, how he can fix them, and most importantly WHY he SHOULD fix them and what not fixing them will lead to in the future. Which I can tell you personally is a long path of regret and self destruction.

It's hard to find people who can provide those things, because some people who do it will tell him what he doesn't want to hear, and other people will tell him what he wants to hear but not enough of it to make a difference. He needs someone who can get on his level, break down to him what he needs to do to improve the quality of his mindset and thoughts, and motivate him to do so. He doesn't need someone holding his hand and that isn't what his post is about, but he does need someone who may have once been in the position he's in who has some sort of experience in what he's going through to be able to help him overcome his bad habits.

Good points Gold777. My response was based on his post, both in content and context, and I absolutely believe that he has that fire inside of him. I can feel the power in his post. To change, you have to want to change. If someone wants to change bad enough, they don't need someone to hold them accountable. Wouldn't you agree?

Well, I think he has the money, and the entrepreneurial mindset to be serious about his shortcomings to the point where he felt compelled to write here. That is why I know that if he focused and pushed himself mentally and physically, he can master a routine that works with him.