Thread: Patience+sacrifice turning to insanity

social life is overrated, if your actually making money, and have something going on, you got more than me so far...

on the other hand isnt insane hours kind of breaking the point of being an entrepreneur ?

I dont know, when I think entrepreneur I think be my own boss, set my own hours, etc etc, 4 hour work week, that kind of thing

I understand where your coming from completely theBiz.

For awhile I was losing my mind and I still have so much more to push forward. I appreciate you posting this, I feel like I'm not alone now.

MJ made a video explaining this topic. This is where you really have to dig in and push forward. Don't give up!

I'd imagine having a partner would ease the pain. Somebody who shares a common goal and motivates you as you motivate them.

Originally Posted by fastlanecurious

social life is overrated, if your actually making money, and have something going on, you got more than me so far...

on the other hand isnt insane hours kind of breaking the point of being an entrepreneur ?

I used to think the same until I realized I was the most happiest when around my friends and other people. Money does not always matter when in those situations.

People make each other happy, we live for other people.

Social life is not over rated but under rated.

theBiz,

You fail when you quit.

Are you willing to quit on your dreams and live a life of mediocrity? There is a reason most people take this route; it's easy. Anyone can do it. Do you want to be 'anyone'?

Most people work those ridiculously long hours for many years before they reach what you call 'success'. I define success as being in the process of achieving my goals.

I am always happiest when I am doing. Doing whatever it takes to reach the next milestone. Calling the next client. Making the next deal.

For me, a social life if crucial to achieving my goals. 'Who you know' is very important (at least for me) in business. I have been very careful in the selection of my social circles. These people are all success minded people who are peak performers.

Most of them are entrepreneurs. Some of them are investors. A very few of them are 9-5ers. But all of them have drive and a passion for success. If you can create this kind of peer group, then your social interactions will be very important to you.

If you are hanging around the mediocre crowd, then you should be shying away from the social interactions. You need to upgrade your friends anyway.

Very great lesson GlobalWealth.


I now forgive you for declining my facebook invite.

Originally Posted by GlobalWealth

If you are hanging around the mediocre crowd, then you should be shying away from the social interactions. You need to upgrade your friends anyway.

It's very crazy how easy it is to fall into the habits of others, hence saying to stay away from a mediocre crowd (if you plan to become successful).

The people I hung around at college completely changed habits of mine. While I enjoyed the time the habits really ended up biting me in the ass. I don't mean for this to be a "blame game", because it's just as much my fault for falling into the habits\hanging with those people. It's just you really do become people you hang around with (and influence their habits too).

It's definitely hard to just stop talking\associating with friends of the past though. It's not like they've changed, or I've changed in terms of personality. It's just habits define who we become, and hanging out, watching movies\tv for hours, or constantly partying is not going to make me become who I want. They are still awesome people, but what they do won't get me to where I "need" to get.

To add something relevant than my venting I don't think it's so much you need to not socialize, but socialize with different people. It's very easy to fall into [unproductive] habits of others if we indulge too much in just instant gratification.

As much as I agree that sacrifices need to be made in order to become successful, I don't believe you have to cut all social ties.

If you have mates that you have grown up with and are very close to then I don't think you need to ditch them because they don't think 'fastlane'. Even though they do not think the same as you there can still be room for them in your life (as long as they don't restrict you in anyway)

I have a number of people who I deem close mates and even though they are your typical 9 to 5'ers I can still fit them into my life one way or another.

Put it this way, none of us know how long we will live on this earth, therefore surely its a matter of getting a balance between your work and social life. The balance may be 95% career, 5% social but at least it keeps you sane!

Hey, this may not be the ideal way to do it but it is how I am going about it and I seem to manage fine. My friends stay out of my professional life and when we are together its purely just to have some laughs and this brings everything into perspective.

You fail when you quit.

Are you willing to quit on your dreams and live a life of mediocrity? There is a reason most people take this route; it's easy. Anyone can do it. Do you want to be 'anyone'?

Most people work those ridiculously long hours for many years before they reach what you call 'success'. I define success as being in the process of achieving my goals.

No i am not willing to quit, i have made it too far and sacrificed too much already. Trust me Global i know giving up is wrong, i will do anything rather than give in to mediocrity..Anything. I know this much.. im either going to make a big difference in this world and be wealthy or be such a broke dead beat because all my eggs are in one basket but considering how tough it is out there i see no other way.
I appreciate all the comments its helps, thank you.

To me this is just a big game. My friends say I am obsessed. I say, "look, to me this is just another hobby. When I ran marathons I wanted to be the best and perform to the best of my abilities. When I race cars I wanted to be the best on the road. This is just one more hobby to me. I don't take it serious and I have so much fun with it."

Don't take it so serious is what I say. Sure I work 7 days a week but I am having fun the whole time.

have friends that have the same passion for you for business/success. Then there is no conflict in your social and business life.

For me, finding a balance is important. When I first started I had very little social life because of the time I was investing into building what I have today but I did give myself a break now and then so that I could stay centered and focused. If I had not done that I would have burnt out for sure. Even today only having to spend a few hours a day actually working I am always trying to stay balanced and centered with all the other things I have going on, business or personal. The rest of my "work day" consists of others things I enjoy doing but I can easily get carried away doing those things as well and become unbalanced, so for me its always a work in progress and as with anything else in life the more practice you have at it, the better you become at it.

I also want to add that having a social network does not need to consist of people who are like minded as I am. There are many people out there that are 9 to 5'ers and have a lot to contribute in my life. Their wealth and guidance helped get me to where I am today and its not because of the size of their bank account. To me that is priceless. I do see many of them struggling day in and day out but it does not deter me from where I am heading.

Originally Posted by GlobalWealth

I am always happiest when I am doing. Doing whatever it takes to reach the next milestone.

For me, a social life if crucial to achieving my goals. 'Who you know' is very important (at least for me) in business. I have been very careful in the selection of my social circles. These people are all success minded people who are peak performers.

Most of them are entrepreneurs. Some of them are investors. A very few of them are 9-5ers. But all of them have drive and a passion for success. If you can create this kind of peer group, then your social interactions will be very important to you.

We're sitting on the "Santa Train" today (the Napa Wine Train becomes the Santa Train for locals each year, great for the kids, and an amazing place to network for the adults if you sit next to the right folks).

We chatted w/the parents next to us for most of the trip. I offered them some of our Mead (honey wine). We had a great time. Near the end, they asked us where our daughter was going to go to school for kindergarten next year. We mentioned a few spots, but said that Blue Oak Charter School was our #1 choice (it's only a block from our house, and is an amazing-- but crazy expensive--private school).

Turns out the guy (dad I've been talking to the whole trip) is on the Board, and had some ideas about how to make it affordable.

Carpe Diem.

-Russ H.

Wow Bobby, if I could speed ALL of your posts I would, but for now, I rep'd this one because....

Originally Posted by GlobalWealth

I am always happiest when I am doing. Doing whatever it takes to reach the next milestone. Calling the next client. Making the next deal.

For me right now, I am very scatter-brained and need focus, however, I am so glad that I am keeping busy and having fun doing what I'm doing. To me more important than actually doing tax preparation work is the challenge of everything that goes along with it from learning the laws, to creating marketing campaigns and also learning from my contemporaries in how I can create the next big tax franchise

Originally Posted by GlobalWealth

For me, a social life if crucial to achieving my goals. 'Who you know' is very important (at least for me) in business. I have been very careful in the selection of my social circles. These people are all success minded people who are peak performers.

Most of them are entrepreneurs. Some of them are investors. A very few of them are 9-5ers. But all of them have drive and a passion for success. If you can create this kind of peer group, then your social interactions will be very important to you.

If you are hanging around the mediocre crowd, then you should be shying away from the social interactions. You need to upgrade your friends anyway.

Here's something I'm wrestling with. For example my best friend is a dedicated Slowlaner, something I wouldn't have a problem with aside from the fact that his dedication to the Slowlane ties up his time and freedom, thus making him virtually unavailable as a friend(he works 5am-7pm, usually works weekends and is in bed by 9-9:30pm, so even finding the right time to call is a challenge). In addition, I have other Slowlaner friends with the same issues. It is to the point that I feel I can't call them b/c they're working extended hours or just don't understand the Fastlane ideology and I feel like I'm preaching to the choir when I try to tell them to "become a better you!" since I still have not achieved that level of success myself.

I believe it's in RK's "Cashflow Quadrant" where he states that your net worth is equivalent to the average of your 5 closest associates/friends, the fact that I have associated mostly with Slowlaners and spent more time proselytizing as I've been preaching more than practicing has shown in my current Sidewalker/Slowlaner status.

Additionally, I will come out and say that I am a little disappointed with my recent move

One of the main reasons I came down to PHX was because I knew there were a lot of Fastlaners here and having met quite a few of them at B&P '09 I was hoping to become closer with many of them. I know I have a lot of common interests with locals aside from Fastlaning(i.e. exotic cars, travel, softball, etc) and it seems like I can't get anyone to come out and hang out.

I understand that everyone is busy, however, this time of year I am very flexible and if need-be I'll meet up at 5am on a Wed for a quick cup of Joe or 9pm on a Sat for beer.

Part of my impatience and persistence goes with the fact that starting next month I will be literally doing the 7-for-0 trade for at least the next 3 months, if not more and want to get to know who I can best associate with not only on a business level, but a personal as well.

Originally Posted by vr4playa

. . .as I've been preaching more than practicing has shown in my current Sidewalker/Slowlaner status.

Additionally, I will come out and say that I am a little disappointed with my recent move

One of the main reasons I came down to PHX was because I knew there were a lot of Fastlaners here and having met quite a few of them at B&P '09 I was hoping to become closer with many of them. I know I have a lot of common interests with locals aside from Fastlaning(i.e. exotic cars, travel, softball, etc) and it seems like I can't get anyone to come out and hang out.

I understand that everyone is busy, however, this time of year I am very flexible and if need-be I'll meet up at 5am on a Wed for a quick cup of Joe or 9pm on a Sat for beer.

Part of my impatience and persistence goes with the fact that starting next month I will be literally doing the 7-for-0 trade for at least the next 3 months, if not more and want to get to know who I can best associate with not only on a business level, but a personal as well.

I can't speak for any of the Phx-based Fastlaners, but I can share a story w/you:

Back in the early 1990s, I opened an office in the LA area.

I had dozens of business-friends in LA (more than where I lived, in Northern CA), and was *really* looking forward to hanging out w/them. They had always said, "Hey, when you're in town, give me a call!", so I figured, wow, here was my chance-- we'd all get together and have fun, and talk about business.

Except it totally didn't happen.

In the entire time I lived in LA ('92-'94), both in Orange County and in Bel Air, I never once was able to get industry friends to stop by my house/office.

Sure, I did meet and have dinner w/one or two in that two year period-- but (here's the irony)-- I actually saw them more frequently when we were both at shows OUT OF TOWN-- not where we lived!!!

It was a hard (and painful) lesson for me: My expectations of moving to the "hot spot" of my biz were, in actuality, totally overblown. My life was very solitary, and nothing like the buzzing social scene I'd imagined.

Hey, even a beer once a month would have been awesome.

Never happened.

****************

As I said at the beginning, I can't speak for any of the Phoenix crew. But I assume they already have established lives that they love, and your being around is not really a part of that.

So, if I were you (and I'm not-- but if I were), I'd take it easy. Stop asking folks to get together. Get settled in, and work your butt off on getting lined up for tax season.

Plan on enjoying the amazing place you've just moved to, and let the relationship-building take its own course.

-Russ H.

Thanks for the advice Russ I really needed that

Bottom line is I need to just get lost in my business and once I'm successful they'll come to me, not to mention our business being similar to DK's involves "sell to the masses and live with the classes" so while I would love to get the input/feedback of the classes, the life-blood of our business depends on how well we can sell to the masses, especially since the exit strategy for now is franchising, however, we've got Plan B, C and D in the works as well.