The struggle for freedom

[BellaPippin]

Hello everybody,

My name is Belén (I go by Bel) and I'm 25 y/o. I'm originally from Argentina, but I have been living in Chicago with my husband for 4 years now. I'll try to keep this intro short but insightful.

My reason for coming to this forum is because I'm a lonely fastlaner-at-heart still trapped in a job -bank teller- and I need like-minded friends. I've read too many books on the subject (just finished MFL) but my progress has been very little. My biggest obstacle is myself: my procrastination and my lack of discipline.

I have close friends, healthy friendships in Bs.As., couple of those have been actively pursuing the fastlane with a mobile game and finally started seeing profits. Unfortunately now living here I can't see them or hang out with them. Besides that, I have inspired a few of my friends to think about the fastlane, but I have never had anyone that encouraged the fastlane in me (besides my own thoughts). I could say I need a mentor, but for now I think that just having someone who told me "how come you haven't made any progress this week, I know you can do better" would make a big difference. I consider being active here is a start, but I know I need to build this kind of circles also in the outside world.

My short term goal is to start seeing a profit on my venture; I seem to have a good niche/audience with great potential however I have been failing at finding a product that is of enough value to them to pay for it. The things I have tried have failed, but I lack feedback on it -or I haven't read the right signs-. My long-term goal is the freedom of the rat race, good money, big money. I want to be able to travel back and forth to see my family when I please. Pay off my parent's mortgage if possible. If I was able to hit big money I would love to give birth to ventures that help communities in need.

I hope I can add value to this forum as well as get a hand with some of my struggles, but more importantly surround myself with the right support.

Thanks for reading

~Bel

 

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[Bellini]

Welcome Bel !

Argentina is on my list of places to visit one day. Some people have actually thought I was from Argentina because of my skin tone, etc.

We all share your desire to get out of the rat-race. You can do it.

 

[Roli]

My biggest obstacle is myself: my procrastination and my lack of discipline.

~Bel

Sometimes writing things down can help clarify things and you have identified the problem, which is clearly the first step to solving it.

I know nothing about you, but for me when I was in a similar situation I did 2 things.

First I took the 30 days of discipline course at Bold & Determined, which amongst other things involves early rising and exercise.
Secondly I analysed how much free time I had and saw what I was doing with it, which was mainly watching mindless TV and/or going out or staying in drinking after my "stressful" week.

So I simply cut that crap out and started getting a buzz out of my new found focus, as far as my goals where concerned I wrote them down and broke them down into their smallest parts and just got on with it. I still feel lonely sometimes and feel like I want someone to mentor me, but when I'm in that mood I imagine what a mentor would say and really as far as motivation is concerned, it's not too hard to guess what any successful mentor would say to you.

Keep coming to this forum and reading threads and asking advice but basically I advise using 30 days of discipline or some such regime to shock you out of the homoeostasis you find yourself in, that will give you the motivation to fill your time with productivity.

Keep posting your progress and don't be negative about yourself.

 

[mws87]

My biggest obstacle is myself: my procrastination and my lack of discipline.

Welcome to the forum. ^^^ this right here says a lot, actually. Most people are far from acknowledging this, so keep in mind that you're one step ahead of most right now.

It took me 10 years (yikes!) to finally realize I was holding myself back.

Find your vision, accomplish your goals one at a time to reach that vision and be happy it all started with something as simple as an acknowledgment.

Learn to love the process and the struggle, for if you're on the right path, it will make it all Worth while.

Also, you made mention of your friends not encouraging your fastlane ambition. I will tell you this: you will be surprised how many people "back out" from supporting you once you start taking (continuous) action. I'm not entirely sure why, but it may be because as individuals, we all like to believe our personal reality is the "right" one. Don't sweat it; they'll be there for you once they see your success lol.

Finding friend's of the same mindset is hard as hell, I don't even communicate with my friends anymore, I just hit up this forum (sounds kinda sad). You've found a great community, so once again - welcome!

 

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[BellaPippin]

Sometimes writing things down can help clarify things and you have identified the problem, which is clearly the first step to solving it.

I know nothing about you, but for me when I was in a similar situation I did 2 things.

First I took the 30 days of discipline course at Bold & Determined, which amongst other things involves early rising and exercise.
Secondly I analysed how much free time I had and saw what I was doing with it, which was mainly watching mindless TV and/or going out or staying in drinking after my "stressful" week.

So I simply cut that crap out and started getting a buzz out of my new found focus, as far as my goals where concerned I wrote them down and broke them down into their smallest parts and just got on with it. I still feel lonely sometimes and feel like I want someone to mentor me, but when I'm in that mood I imagine what a mentor would say and really as far as motivation is concerned, it's not too hard to guess what any successful mentor would say to you.

Keep coming to this forum and reading threads and asking advice but basically I advise using 30 days of discipline or some such regime to shock you out of the homoeostasis you find yourself in, that will give you the motivation to fill your time with productivity.

Keep posting your progress and don't be negative about yourself.

Thanks for the reply, @Roli ,

Would you say the program is good for ladies too? I've checked it out and it seems geared towards men. I'm pretty sure rising early and exercising is unisex, just wondering about the rest of it.

As for the crap I need to cut I think I am past the point where I read about entrepreneurship as a form of procrastination instead of actually doing anything with the info. I count with very little "free time" in a day but I'm inclined to think The solution is to stop not accounting for that time. Make a schedule for the week and refer to it, kind of like one accounts for every dollar on a budget.

 

[BellaPippin]

Welcome to the forum. ^^^ this right here says a lot, actually. Most people are far from acknowledging this, so keep in mind that you're one step ahead of most right now.

It took me 10 years (yikes!) to finally realize I was holding myself back.

Find your vision, accomplish your goals one at a time to reach that vision and be happy it all started with something as simple as an acknowledgment.

Learn to love the process and the struggle, for if you're on the right path, it will make it all Worth while.

Also, you made mention of your friends not encouraging your fastlane ambition. I will tell you this: you will be surprised how many people "back out" from supporting you once you start taking (continuous) action. I'm not entirely sure why, but it may be because as individuals, we all like to believe our personal reality is the "right" one. Don't sweat it; they'll be there for you once they see your success lol.

Finding friend's of the same mindset is hard as hell, I don't even communicate with my friends anymore, I just hit up this forum (sounds kinda sad). You've found a great community, so once again - welcome!

Hey, thanks a lot. Yesterday I was thinking that even the only time I tried going to a counselor -for other personal things, but mainly because I needed someone to talk to- I could not connect to this person because every time I talk about my goals they nod and smile but you can tell inside they are thinking "look at her, so naive and lazy, she just doesn't wanna work". Or you'll tell someone "I don't want to work for a living" and they will be like "well this is how society is!" Like what the heck man, all this people with businesses that work for them aren't aliens. It's real. Haha. We are lonely people until we hit big money, huh...

 

[mws87]

Hey, thanks a lot. Yesterday I was thinking that even the only time I tried going to a counselor -for other personal things, but mainly because I needed someone to talk to- I could not connect to this person because every time I talk about my goals they nod and smile but you can tell inside they are thinking "look at her, so naive and lazy, she just doesn't wanna work". Or you'll tell someone "I don't want to work for a living" and they will be like "well this is how society is!" Like what the heck man, all this people with businesses that work for them aren't aliens. It's real. Haha. We are lonely people until we hit big money, huh...

Good therapists can be hard to come by as well. There are some great ones out there, but some of the ones I've talked to couldn't relate much to me and had no experiences they could share with me. It was as if they were being paid to give me general response from what they learned in school. It felt like a doctor looking up symptoms on WebMD to diagnose a problem. It's the same as MJ's "shadowy fat guy giving you fitness advice" comparison.

Oh, the ol' "you don't want to slave away your whole life for someone else? You're lazy!" comments. I can't help but L-O-L every time I hear that crap. Throughout my whole life (even before I knew what an entrepreneur was) the day job never seemed appealing. I seriously didn't get it. Yet, I was always told I was lazy (even though I AM a hard worker) simply because I didn't want to have a job forever. I honestly believe those who call someone else lazy because they don't want to be married to a dead-end job are those who don't understand the difference between being busy and being productive. This really showed one day at my previous sales job when I had (somehow) managed to knock out all of my day's duties (which was hard as hell) and was yelled at because I didn't "look busy".

 

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[Bila]

Welcome to the forum Bella

 

[Roli]

Thanks for the reply, @Roli ,

Would you say the program is good for ladies too? I've checked it out and it seems geared towards men. I'm pretty sure rising early and exercising is unisex, just wondering about the rest of it.

The program's target market is male, however as you pointed out there is no exclusivity when it comes to exercising and waking early, the point is it is a regime designed to shock you out of any rut you are in. Take from and add to, it what you need; for instance I added meditation to the program.

Budgeting your time is key to putting any long term plan into action, I use 2 apps to do this Todoist and Caynax Time Management. I list the things I have to do for the following day or days with Todoist, then I go into Caynax and work out how much time I'm going to use on each one. I will then add up all the time I've set out for the tasks to make sure I've been realistic with my time estimates, I then go back and adjust the Todist list accordingly, arranging the most important tasks first and moving the secondary tasks to another day if I have to.

As far as procrastination goes I have found a trick that works on a personal level and it may work for you too.

I call it 30 Days of Doing It Now!

This is where I override all feelings of "I'll do it later" so no matter how trivial the task at hand, if I find myself saying "I'll do that later" for no other reason than I can't be bothered to do it now, I'll consciously stop myself and say "no I'll do it now" and then do it. I really am talking trivial things here at first, the washing up, taking a cup back to the kitchen after you've used it, picking up something off the floor or whatever.

I have found that the cumulative effect of not leaving little things, that I could quite happily do immediately till later, is that I am changing my attitude and getting more done and it feels like I'm transitioning from a natural state of "do it later" to "do it now", I have naturally started to apply this "do it now" attitude to more and more important tasks in my life and I am slowly but surely killing that lazy beast; Procrastination.

Try it and see!

 

[Andy Black]

Welcome Bel.

Honesty, gratitude, manners, desire to add value, desire to help others. Nice intro.

The world and this forum needs more people like you.

 

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[Supa]

Nice intro, welcome!

If you want I can send you a weekly pm with this:

"how come you haven't made any progress this week, I know you can do better"

 

[BellaPippin]

Nice intro, welcome!

If you want I can send you a weekly pm with this:

Thanks @Supa that's so nice of you! I would hate to be a burden like that, though. But I promise I'll be thinking of that each week going forward.