That's it I'm moving out

[luniac]

I'm done living with my mother and brother. It's just too F*ckin annoying at this point... i've tried...

I'm gonna roommate with 1, 2 friends tops.
Anyone know the best way to find cheap places in New York City?

I know it takes some searching, i wonder if such a thing as 1 bedroom apt for 1000/month even exists anymore, but a <1000 studio would work i guess.

Maybe there's some good sites i don't know about?

 

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[Mattie]

Why are you asking about apartments on the forum?

News paper
Craigs List
Housing & Development
Real estate offices sometimes know
Keywords: Apartments in New York (Area town)
Boards in stores in the entry way
Contacts you know in your area (friends, relatives)

Really you better have a plan before you just jump off the bridge to apartment hunting. Can you support yourself? Pay for food, utilities, rent, transportation by yourself. What if your friends are just as annoying, have bad habits, and don't ever pay their share of the rent? This happens all the time. Do you have emergency back up in savings if you lose a job or your friends bail?

Think before you act. There are consequences. And if you're not prepared, you can make matters worse for yourself.

 

[theag]

Typical [HASHTAG]#landfill[/HASHTAG] thread

 

[luniac]

Why are you asking about apartments on the forum?

News paper
Craigs List
Housing & Development
Real estate offices sometimes know
Keywords: Apartments in New York (Area town)
Boards in stores in the entry way
Contacts you know in your area (friends, relatives)

Really you better have a plan before you just jump off the bridge to apartment hunting. Can you support yourself? Pay for food, utilities, rent, transportation by yourself. What if your friends are just as annoying, have bad habits, and don't ever pay their share of the rent? This happens all the time. Do you have emergency back up in savings if you lose a job or your friends bail?

Think before you act. There are consequences. And if you're not prepared, you can make matters worse for yourself.

Ehhh it's more of rant i guess.

ive been paying 600+ a month towards rent and bills for over year now while living with my mother. I make 32k at my job, enough to roomate.
If i roomate i could at least bring chicks over, i currently don't even have my own bed or room, and my mother is home almost 24/7.
I need to get away from my parent., and it doesn't help she's very negative about my fastlane ambitions. It doesn't hurt my progress, but it really is annoying, and when i question her life choices she tells me im still a nobody who hasn't lived life yet and i have no right to question her life and decisions.

So fine peace out mom i won't argue, ill move out and live my life then.

 

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[luniac]

Typical [HASHTAG]#landfill[/HASHTAG] thread

i mean.... its offtopic man wtf.

Actually I got you to comment, that's a win in my book hahaaaa!

 

[Mattie]

I make 32k at my job,

Um..If you make 32K, you make more than enough to live by yourself. And if you're still living with your parents, I think that says more about you than your parents. I would say you're not managing your funds if you need to live at home.

 

[luniac]

Um..If you make 32K, you make more than enough to live by yourself. And if you're still living with your parents, I think that says more about you than your parents. I would say you're not managing your funds if you need to live at home.

yes i could live myself but i want to roommate with a friend or 2, it's more awesome that way.

I haven't been mooching of my mother buddy, she hasn't worked for over a year, we live off my share of rent and bills and the child support she receives for my younger brother.
If i move out she'll have to find a smaller apartment and get a job. I've avoided this happening for a year but the shit talking and inconvenience is just not worth it anymore.

 

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[Mattie]

I suggest you guide your mother to the appropriate non-profits, work force programs, or agencies that can help her meet her basic needs if you don't want to help her out. And sounds like to me you're wanting us to give you sympathy, empathy, and understanding, but you don't want to do the same for your mother. If you're in a dysfunctional relationship with your mother there is always counseling, life coaches, and self-help books to know boundaries, and what is appropriate behavior and proper communication techniques.

While she plays her part, it may be the way you're playing your part. What are you doing to help her get on her feet and independent? And if you're and entrepreneur you should be a problem solver. What is the solution to your obstacles and problems? Leaving and hanging out with your buddies doesn't seem like a solution to your problems or your moms to become independent.

You get what you give, and if you're giving her a bunch of crap, you're probably getting just as much crap back. Step out of the drama triangle, and take appropriate actions. If you're an entrepreneur you should know how to manage your life, manage your relationship in the same way. Successful relationships require team work. You work together in the same direction or you part ways and go on your own.

I'm not seeing how you're showing maturity by writing a post about helplessness, but leaving your mom helpless and homeless. Search out the answers, find the available resources, help her learn a skill. No it's not her responsibility to support you, and it's not your responsibility to support her, and does she have any disabilities, illness, or what stops her? I think you better look at the problems and obstacles and evaluate the situation and know what needs to be done in the appropriate manner. That's maturity.

 

[P3HSB]

i currently don't even have my own bed or room, and my mother is home almost 24/7.
I need to get away from my parent., and it doesn't help she's very negative about my fastlane ambitions. It doesn't hurt my progress, but it really is annoying, and when i question her life choices she tells me im still a nobody who hasn't lived life yet and i have no right to question her life and decisions.

I suffer from the same exact issue. Its frustrating.

 

[luniac]

I suggest you guide your mother to the appropriate non-profits, work force programs, or agencies that can help her meet her basic needs if you don't want to help her out. And sounds like to me you're wanting us to give you sympathy, empathy, and understanding, but you don't want to do the same for your mother. If you're in a dysfunctional relationship with your mother there is always counseling, life coaches, and self-help books to know boundaries, and what is appropriate behavior and proper communication techniques.

While she plays her part, it may be the way you're playing your part. What are you doing to help her get on her feet and independent? And if you're and entrepreneur you should be a problem solver. What is the solution to your obstacles and problems? Leaving and hanging out with your buddies doesn't seem like a solution to your problems or your moms to become independent.

You get what you give, and if you're giving her a bunch of crap, you're probably getting just as much crap back. Step out of the drama triangle, and take appropriate actions. If you're an entrepreneur you should know how to manage your life, manage your relationship in the same way. Successful relationships require team work. You work together in the same direction or you part ways and go on your own.

I'm not seeing how you're showing maturity by writing a post about helplessness, but leaving your mom helpless and homeless. Search out the answers, find the available resources, help her learn a skill. No it's not her responsibility to support you, and it's not your responsibility to support her, and does she have any disabilities, illness, or what stops her? I think you better look at the problems and obstacles and evaluate the situation and know what needs to be done in the appropriate manner. That's maturity.

I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm just ranting, i don't feel bad about leaving anymore which is why I'm finally going to do it.

My mother is a smart woman with no disabilities. She used to be a nurse in the soviet union but that degree doesn't transfer over to the US. I mean we've lived in the US for a good 15 years now and she hasn't bothered to do anything about it in all that time. For awhile we lived with my stepfather but for the last 5 years it was just myself, my mother and my brother.

My mother herself told me just last night she can't qualify for anything other than a minimum wage job, but when i mentioned freelance work or just thinking outside the box, she got defensive. When i mention the millionaire fastlane she just says that if a dumbass like me is wasting my life based off advise in that book, then she doesn't even want to look at it.

She watches dry intellectual russian political news about ukraine for hours a day, so she shits all over my app game development because it's all a waste of time when the dollar collapses, china takes over, WW3 starts because of ukraine, etc ,etc etc..... and im just trying to maintain optimism and do my thing and if something horrible happens in the world then ill worry about it. I mean if i'd have such a crappy attitude about the world, then why bother doing anything at all!?

If i move out, she'll get a minimum wage job and combined with 1000 a month child support for my brother and she'll do just fine in a smaller apartment. The minimum wage part is because of her own life choices, i can't help her when i move out, i only make 32k.

If i become a millionaire then of course id make sure she never works again, she is my mother after all, but right now im just done.
You said find a solution? I found one, im leaving.

 

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[Mattie]

If i move out, she'll get a minimum wage job and combined with 1000 a month child support for my mother she'll do just fine in a smaller apartment. The minimum wage part is because of her own life choices, i can't help her at the moment, i only make 32k.

This is the point: It doesn't matter what job she has if she doesn't believe in entrepreneur roads. Minimum wage jobs can support her in low-income housing, mobile homes, and some apartments. If she's getting 1000 a month in child support, and minimum wage job yes she can support herself, but I think you better be clear about how much time she has to find that job. And if you have to drive her there, than drive her. It also sounds like she has cultural beliefs getting her way, and like I stated there are enough non-profits out there to help her with just about everything. Get the paper work, phone numbers, and place them in front of her. She may not like it, because fortunately you're giving her the options. When you've done everything you can and she resists than, yes there's nothing more you can do.

I'm sure there is a work force program around there, and they usually help with training and funds sometimes to help people. You really have to look at what is in your community and point her in the direction and that may just be it. She doesn't know what to do or where to go.

If you call any a churches, any non-profit, or even state assistance, they have a list of resources. The internet probably has a list. There a job sites galore. Does she know how to make a resume, cover letter, fill out online applications. Some parents don't know how to do these things, so it makes them feel hopeless. Does she have appropriate business clothes, make up, shoes, etc? Pull up some videos on you tube for interview skills and answering questions.

What is her personality type? What jobs go with her personality type. There are so many tools to use these days to find a job. Is she depressed? Hopeless? How does she handle her stress? I'm sure she has the same road blocks as the rest of us, and it's just remembering the process of being an entrepreneur, fears, taking action, regulating stress, emotions, and feelings. Same for her? Ask her what her fears are? You should have gained some knowledge through the process to advise her.

 

[luniac]

This is the point: It doesn't matter what job she has if she doesn't believe in entrepreneur roads. Minimum wage jobs can support her in low-income housing, mobile homes, and some apartments. If she's getting 1000 a month in child support, and minimum wage job yes she can support herself, but I think you better be clear about how much time she has to find that job. And if you have to drive her there, than drive her. It also sounds like she has cultural beliefs getting her way, and like I stated there are enough non-profits out there to help her with just about everything. Get the paper work, phone numbers, and place them in front of her. She may not like it, because fortunately you're giving her the options. When you've done everything you can and she resists than, yes there's nothing more you can do.

I'm sure there is a work force program around there, and they usually help with training and funds sometimes to help people. You really have to look at what is in your community and point her in the direction and that may just be it. She doesn't know what to do or where to go.

If you call any a churches, any non-profit, or even state assistance, they have a list of resources. The internet probably has a list. There a job sites galore. Does she know how to make a resume, cover letter, fill out online applications. Some parents don't know how to do these things, so it makes them feel hopeless. Does she have appropriate business clothes, make up, shoes, etc? Pull up some videos on you tube for interview skills and answering questions.

What is her personality type? What jobs go with her personality type. There are so many tools to use these days to find a job. Is she depressed? Hopeless? How does she handle her stress? I'm sure she has the same road blocks as the rest of us, and it's just remembering the process of being an entrepreneur, fears, taking action, regulating stress, emotions, and feelings. Same for her? Ask her what her fears are? You should have gained some knowledge through the process to advise her.

Ill absolutely let her know as far in advance as i can when ill be moving. Good advice though, ill try to cautiously help if i can.

 

[Mattie]

It's just trouble shooting your mother? Fears are probably the culprit. Lack of confidence. Standing on her two feet. Being independent. It's not any different than you. Encouragement goes a long way. "You don't understand" because you're not in her "Shoes." Show her you're not in her shoes, but you know something about fears and confidence and teach her what you learn as you go. Share books and videos, she may or may not listen. Still you placed it there. It's like planting little seeds in a garden. Sooner or later the seeds take root and sprout. Patience, persistence, understanding, empathy, listening.

You don't have to live with someone to do that, but knowledge is power, and it might annoy her at first, but there's always those aha moments when one thinks about ponders and faced with hardship.

 

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[luniac]

That golf course thread just put my silly little life back into proper perspective.

 

[Mikhail Joseph]

I can see how you would feel.

Sometimes, you have to be a little heartless and family or not... I don't think family is an excuse any more. In the end, we're all just people.. and I call family a weakness personally.

So many people I know allow these people to hold them back because they're "family".


Yes, she is your mother and you should always take care of her. But, if she is not disabled in any way possible.. losing your support may give her fear. And when we are afraid and backed into a corner, most of the time we find any way we can to get out of that tough place and change our lives. I call it "finally getting sick of the pebble in your shoe"

But, as I was saying.. Sometimes you just have to cut them back to a point that it allows you to be free from all the shit and hold backs.

Moving out is a good thing and I too moved out recently if you call 1 year ago recently; but it really cleared my head and now I have nothing to blame anyone for why I can't do anything, only myself.

I can never understand the value of family really because I don't have much family.

I grew up, my dad was working in a pizza shop and mum was as well. When dad got sick, we lost the shop and my parents lived off government money.

Dad went bankrupt and lost all his money and continued to get sick.. Honestly, once he lost the shop he went into a deep state of depression and just became a shell of who he once was. before my 18th birthday, he passed away and mum and I moved.. We become very distant and now she has a new bf and I hardly see her because he doesn't like me.

My sister is a loser who will always suck the teet of the tax payers dollars and always use her kids (13 and 17 ) as an excuse on why she can't do anything even though them kids have looked after themselves since they were young due to her drug habits and just bad mothering in general.

My other sister is just you 9-5 worker who's married and has no kids.. good on her, atleast she is trying.

The point to my deep story is; whilst there's many problems and whilst family can often hold you back.. sometimes, you really do just need to let it go especially if you want to succeed. Getting away from the people who do nothing but hold you back and telling you what you're doing is stupid can be the worst thing for goals especially like the people of this forum.

We're all on this forum for one reason: Success. It comes in so many forms, but it all means the same thing.

So yes, move out and breathe... It doesn't mean you can't see them still and you can still ( if you want to ), give them some financial support.. maybe a hundred a week or something like that. =)


Good luck man, honestly; she's not incapable.. she's just making excuses. This is how I see it... If you leave, she's going to have to do something.. Fear really does have a way of pushing our capabilities.

Take me for example.. I had rent to pay a while back and I'm still not at "awesome status" entrepreneur yet.. but I'm trying.

I needed to make 200 dollars.

What I did: Fiverr and a blog post with an affiliate.

I used a auto poster to target all the groups I wanted to do my fiverr service to and posted it. ( over 100 groups ).

My blog post, I did the same thing in the form of content marketing.

I ended up making more than I needed for the rent, but I was scared man and the last thing I would want to do is beg.. So, I pushed myself and I got the results.

Whilst it's not a lot of money, fear helped me get it.. Fear creates many entrepreneurs because it pushes us into action. The people on the streets, the homeless.. Whilst many couldn't help their situation.. Many also just gave up and let themselves lose control.


Take control, you are your own master.

 

[luniac]

I can see how you would feel.

Sometimes, you have to be a little heartless and family or not... I don't think family is an excuse any more. In the end, we're all just people.. and I call family a weakness personally.

So many people I know allow these people to hold them back because they're "family".


Yes, she is your mother and you should always take care of her. But, if she is not disabled in any way possible.. losing your support may give her fear. And when we are afraid and backed into a corner, most of the time we find any way we can to get out of that tough place and change our lives. I call it "finally getting sick of the pebble in your shoe"

But, as I was saying.. Sometimes you just have to cut them back to a point that it allows you to be free from all the shit and hold backs.

Moving out is a good thing and I too moved out recently if you call 1 year ago recently; but it really cleared my head and now I have nothing to blame anyone for why I can't do anything, only myself.

I can never understand the value of family really because I don't have much family.

I grew up, my dad was working in a pizza shop and mum was as well. When dad got sick, we lost the shop and my parents lived off government money.

Dad went bankrupt and lost all his money and continued to get sick.. Honestly, once he lost the shop he went into a deep state of depression and just became a shell of who he once was. before my 18th birthday, he passed away and mum and I moved.. We become very distant and now she has a new bf and I hardly see her because he doesn't like me.

My sister is a loser who will always suck the teet of the tax payers dollars and always use her kids (13 and 17 ) as an excuse on why she can't do anything even though them kids have looked after themselves since they were young due to her drug habits and just bad mothering in general.

My other sister is just you 9-5 worker who's married and has no kids.. good on her, atleast she is trying.

The point to my deep story is; whilst there's many problems and whilst family can often hold you back.. sometimes, you really do just need to let it go especially if you want to succeed. Getting away from the people who do nothing but hold you back and telling you what you're doing is stupid can be the worst thing for goals especially like the people of this forum.

We're all on this forum for one reason: Success. It comes in so many forms, but it all means the same thing.

So yes, move out and breathe... It doesn't mean you can't see them still and you can still ( if you want to ), give them some financial support.. maybe a hundred a week or something like that. =)


Good luck man, honestly; she's not incapable.. she's just making excuses. This is how I see it... If you leave, she's going to have to do something.. Fear really does have a way of pushing our capabilities.

Take me for example.. I had rent to pay a while back and I'm still not at "awesome status" entrepreneur yet.. but I'm trying.

I needed to make 200 dollars.

What I did: Fiverr and a blog post with an affiliate.

I used a auto poster to target all the groups I wanted to do my fiverr service to and posted it. ( over 100 groups ).

My blog post, I did the same thing in the form of content marketing.

I ended up making more than I needed for the rent, but I was scared man and the last thing I would want to do is beg.. So, I pushed myself and I got the results.

Whilst it's not a lot of money, fear helped me get it.. Fear creates many entrepreneurs because it pushes us into action. The people on the streets, the homeless.. Whilst many couldn't help their situation.. Many also just gave up and let themselves lose control.


Take control, you are your own master.

Agreed man, fear is a powerful motivator.

 

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[DeletedUser394]

At the end of the day, you aren't responsible for anything but your own happiness.

You owe your family nothing.

I moved out a while ago, my rent and expenses went up 400% overnight, yet I couldn't be happier. Truly changed my life and my perspective on the world. Will never go back to the person I was before.

Went from the burbs to a downtown sub-penthouse. Killing life.

 

[Mattie]

my younger brother.

I suppose this is why I stated what I did. I hope the child has someone to take them in and can avoid the foster care system.

 

[Formless]

I suggest you guide your mother to the appropriate non-profits, work force programs, or agencies that can help her meet her basic needs if you don't want to help her out. And sounds like to me you're wanting us to give you sympathy, empathy, and understanding, but you don't want to do the same for your mother. If you're in a dysfunctional relationship with your mother there is always counseling, life coaches, and self-help books to know boundaries, and what is appropriate behavior and proper communication techniques.

Why are you putting this on him? This fastlane 'cult of personal responsibility' gets a little irritating sometimes.

You can't fix people who don't want to be fixed.

 

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[Mattie]

I suppose you can choose relationships over money, money over relationships, or learn to have a balance of both. It's personal choice. Bottom line what ever choices you make always have a ripple effect on many people not just you. I guess it depends on what it's worth. Even Dan Pena If I remember hearing him say, still has a relationship with his mother in law, has a family, and wife. I believe even Vigilante has children and a family. Why don't you ask them how they managed to keep a family and make money. I think listening Vigilante's radio stream he made a bad choice and lost, and I remember him saying he was thankful his wife stood through thick and thing with him. She could have divorced him, told him to get lost, he was a F*ck up etc. We all make choices. The O.P. can make them and live with the aftermath of what every choice he makes. Bottom line none of us have too.

 

[DrunkFish]

Why are you putting this on him? This fastlane 'cult of personal responsibility' gets a little irritating sometimes.

You can't fix people who don't want to be fixed.

That's what I was thinking. I have a mother somewhat like this, in terms of minimum wage job etc etc. If I tried to tell her all of this I wouldn't even get a foot in the door. Some people don't want to change, and change only comes from the person. Not you.

 

[Mattie]

There's always a millionaire or billionaire above you thinking the same thing about you.

 

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[AntEmpire]

You owe your family nothing.

Thank you for saying this!!!

I get so sick of this 'owe family' mentality, especially when it comes to mothers. People think you owe your mother the world because she gave birth to you, always forgetting you didn't ask to be born, especially to $hitty parents (if you have those).

I'm not saying turn your back cold on the people who raised you, but a person shouldn't have to hold themselves back in life for the sake of taking care of a falsely needy parent or family member. This is similar to my family. I'm a woman from a female dominated family and I see this all the time with my aunts and older female cousins (including my own mother): people healthy, intelligent and perfectly capable of working bumming off their adult children because it's just easier.

My mother is like this and if I had given in to her selfish needs and fears I wouldn't have gone to college, wouldn't have moved out on my own, wouldn't have studied abroad, wouldn't be working abroad (currently) and wouldn't have extra money to invest in myself and my entrepreneur pursuits. Ironically, each time I left home my mother "miraculously" found a way to get along just fine without my physical presence and financial support.

What I'm about to say next will probably rub some people the wrong but here it goes: sometimes women need to get over themselves. Mothers are freaking fantastic, but they are not the center of the universe. When comparing the mothers to the fathers in my family, most of the fathers who are capable of working are still working. My grandfather in his late 70s still goes to work everyday. Even my father continued to work when he was going through chemo and radiation.

So to the op, just move out. Period. Don't wait around giving her deadlines. If she hits rock bottom after your exit, she'll find a way to get back on her feet. They always do...

End rant//

 

[Mattie]

I suppose we all have our experiences: In my family everyone did just that, divorced, abandoned, divorced, abandoned, and pretty much I suppose that's the mentality of the world. So more feels like you're orphan your whole life, because everyone doesn't take responsibility for their part and grow up, mature, and develop. So yay! I guess because the herd does it. You better do it! It's such a joyful experience.

 

[luniac]

I suppose this is why I stated what I did. I hope the child has someone to take them in and can avoid the foster care system.

he's about to turn 17, time for him to get his first job anyway...

 

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[luniac]

Looking for apartments with my friends now, we're all very very eager to GTFO of where we individually live now.
I think deep inside my moms happy im moving out. She had told me on occasion after an argument that she wants me to leave already, so this is it.

 

[Mattie]

That's not so bad if he's 17. I try to respect other people's opinions and view point, and I have mine. I believe people make the choices that are best for them. I also am a social entrepreneur which is quite different than a business entrepreneur. I see how there are upper class authoritarians that believe in tough love a certain way that may be useful in business.

I remember a CPS worker landing a pile of books in front of us. A large amount of children's faces that are in the foster care system. I remember reading tons of files on cases through generations. And while I can't talk about those families, I also have seen how the system isn't working, how their not being taught the correct information to get on their feet and off the welfare system. How they're not being directed in where they can be independent and responsible and end up back on the welfare system. It's easy to be at the top and state it's no one's responsibility, and we shouldn't have to do anything. And on the same note, tell them you won't change and you won't do anything to help yourself. Grants and funds were axed for other agendas the last year I was in college in 2011. Which made it difficult for my class as social workers to go out there do anything. Non-profits were overwhelmed with people, not having the resources to give them guidance, and no jobs in this geographical location. College's were overflowing with new students. In the last five years that community became more violent with guns and deaths in the neighborhood and state police are now being pulled in to get that under control and assist local police. Fortunately, without money, education, and someone teaching these people the right actions and choices and having family values and responsibility, you have these problems that will grow bigger and bigger. And than you worry about carrying a gun around to protect yourself.

I think personally the "Individual" and "Greed" of society is creating a disaster and how much money does cost to clean up that mess in the end? And where does that money again come from? It comes from your pocket book. And so, I have a hard time understanding, If you don't address the problems of society and it's the "Me" and "Greed" how you believe this will not affect your pocket book at some point, because you're not willing to educate the lower class. To me it seems like it will just keep circling around when it's no one's responsibility to help anyone else. I could be imagining things, but it's quite logical if you're supporting the fact family should no longer exist it's going to solve financial problems. This just causes grief, depression, crime, mental disorders, and chaos and confusion. It doesn't solve problems.

 

[luniac]

That's not so bad if he's 17. I try to respect other people's opinions and view point, and I have mine. I believe people make the choices that are best for them. I also am a social entrepreneur which is quite different than a business entrepreneur. I see how there are upper class authoritarians that believe in tough love a certain way that may be useful in business.

I remember a CPS worker landing a pile of books in front of us. A large amount of children's faces that are in the foster care system. I remember reading tons of files on cases through generations. And while I can't talk about those families, I also have seen how the system isn't working, how their not being taught the correct information to get on their feet and off the welfare system. How they're not being directed in where they can be independent and responsible and end up back on the welfare system. It's easy to be at the top and state it's no one's responsibility, and we shouldn't have to do anything. And on the same note, tell them you won't change and you won't do anything to help yourself. Grants and funds were axed for other agendas the last year I was in college in 2011. Which made it difficult for my class as social workers to go out there do anything. Non-profits were overwhelmed with people, not having the resources to give them guidance, and no jobs in this geographical location. College's were overflowing with new students. In the last five years that community became more violent with guns and deaths in the neighborhood and state police are now being pulled in to get that under control and assist local police. Fortunately, without money, education, and someone teaching these people the right actions and choices and having family values and responsibility, you have these problems that will grow bigger and bigger. And than you worry about carrying a gun around to protect yourself.

I think personally the "Individual" and "Greed" of society is creating a disaster and how much money does cost to clean up that mess in the end? And where does that money again come from? It comes from your pocket book. And so, I have a hard time understanding, If you don't address the problems of society and it's the "Me" and "Greed" how you believe this will not affect your pocket book at some point, because you're not willing to educate the lower class. To me it seems like it will just keep circling around when it's no one's responsibility to help anyone else. I could be imagining things, but it's quite logical if you're supporting the fact family should no longer exist it's going to solve financial problems. This just causes grief, depression, crime, mental disorders, and chaos and confusion. It doesn't solve problems.

That's deep bro, i'd say too deep for this particular situation. I do believe family should stick together but i think oftentimes some distance will actually bring a family closer, such as in this case... maybe not seeing my mother for a year or 2 will make me miss her company cause right now i'd breathe a sign of relief to be away from her presence.

 

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[Mattie]

That's deep bro, i'd say too deep for this particular situation. I do believe family should stick together but i think oftentimes some distance will actually bring a family closer, such as in this case... maybe not seeing my mother for a year or 2 will make me miss her company cause right now i'd breathe a sign of relief to be away from her presence.

Yes, I'm a deep thinker, and look the whole picture and have for a long time. You're situation just reminds me of my "Why". lol I understand full well space and time are good in certain situations for the right reason. My brain is always solving puzzles. I've done the same, but I made sure everything was in place before I left. lol So no, I just didn't get up and drop everything, I put things in order. Not in the best way possible, but the best I could in the situation. Again that's part of my "Why?" I suppose it also depends on whether you're coming from an Authoritative or Authoritarian point of view. Both have the same goal, but two different methods to getting to the same place.

 

[DeletedUser394]

I ain't going to waste anyone's time here by writing a novel that nobody will read anyway.

Sir, it's the 6th of September. If you are absolutely committed to finding your own happiness and a more positive environment to thrive in, there is no reason at all for you to not have a new place lined up for October 1st.

You can start off with just a room in a decent area. Build from there. If moving your stuff is a hassle, sell it all and rent furnished, or even just leave it behind as it is part of your old life.

That golf course thread just put my silly little life back into proper perspective.

Your situation is the most important thing to you. You do have that housing issue now (which is significant), but it's a quick and easy fix. Where and how you live really is a big deal. Your life can change drastically when you a hold a key to your own place.

I come across as an a**hole a lot, but that's because I put myself first. My happiness is more important than what other people think of me.

I left on bad terms. I decided I'd had enough, and 4 hours later I was gone. For about 2 weeks I was 'homeless' while I searched for my own place. Lived in hotels for a while, and when that got to be too expensive I put two office chairs together and slept on those in my office.

Put happiness first. Life is way too short to be in a bad situation in life. Many things you can't control, but this you certainly can.