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How much time do you spend hanging out?

Topics relating to managing people and relationships

MVProduct

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How much time do you spend hanging out with friends per day? I'm talking about social gatherings and get-togethers, doing activities with peers, etc. I realize I haven't really been making time for other people.

Don't get me wrong- I try to go out every now and then, but it seems like all the people in my social circle go out regularly and hang out with each other practically all the time. In that sense, I feel alone. We're all relatively young. I'm in my early twenties, so naturally that's when you should be going out, meeting people, and building lifelong relationships. Right?

See, I'm so tied up with my learning / business that I'd rather spend time at night reading a book, learning programming, or working on a business instead of socializing and hanging out with my friends.

I'm curious to know- is there anybody else out there going through a similar scenario? Have we, entrepreneurs, become socially-isolated? Is there a common period of time in the entrepreneur's life where they sacrifice time spent with people to focus on their ventures?
 
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jockinbox

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How much time do you spend hanging out with friends per day? I'm talking about social gatherings and get-togethers, doing activities with peers, etc. I realize I haven't really been making time for other people.

Don't get me wrong- I try to go out every now and then, but it seems like all the people in my social circle go out regularly and hang out with each other practically all the time. In that sense, I feel alone. We're all relatively young. I'm in my early twenties, so naturally that's when you should be going out, meeting people, and building lifelong relationships. Right?

See, I'm so tied up with my learning / business that I'd rather spend time at night reading a book, learning programming, or working on a business instead of socializing and hanging out with my friends.

I'm curious to know- is there anybody else out there going through a similar scenario? Have we, entrepreneurs, become socially-isolated? Is there a common period of time in the entrepreneur's life where they sacrifice time spent with people to focus on their ventures?



 

theag

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Zero right now... will probably stay like that until mid/end of January.. gearing up for christmas season and then fulfilling orders in january..

havent gone out for more than a year... gf left me... who cares.. first things first.
 

MVProduct

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I can't help but worry that by isolating myself, I'm harming my social interaction & communication skills, my ability to develop rapport & trust, and to overall create long-term friendships. I'm also labelled "anti-social" by my fellow peers. "That guy...he never goes out and never hangs out with us."

Do any of you feel the same way as well?
 
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Ryllban

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around 5-6 hours every month
 

Ryllban

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I can't help but worry that by isolating myself, I'm harming my social interaction & communication skills, my ability to develop rapport & trust, and to overall create long-term friendships. I'm also labelled "anti-social" by my fellow peers. "That guy...he never goes out and never hangs out with us."

Do any of you feel the same way as well?
Yupp I feel it too. But at the same time I feel this too: Ohh I hate my dayjob. Ohh I hate my lifestyle at the moment. Ohh I cant take this lifestyle for another year or two.

My desire to break out from my current lifesituation is way bigger than keeping a regular day to day or week to week contact. I can do all that once Im settled.
 

marklov

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I usually take every 2nd friday off and go clubbing , couple drinks with the "bros' some chicks and have some fun or sometimes I go on a long country side drive and get hit with some fresh country air to clear my mind and just forget about work for awhile.

I never feel isolated or alone because I make sure to keep up with my "social circle maintenance" ( totally made that up) I have noticed a lot of persons let relationships deteriorate (sometimes necessary) when they are working the "fastlane" but I like keeping an healthy social life and sharpening my soft skills because I hate sitting behind a computer a computer for hours on end but it's a "sacrifice" ill gladly make.
 
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Shdreams

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I had a gf leave me due to my loyalty to my job and the customers. It sucked, But she didn't, So it was no big loss in the end. I have mastered the art of quiet contemplation while absorbing my current wifes thoughts and needs. or organizing projects between diapers and dinner.
 

twdavis

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I've been spending practically no time at all going out lately, but I do still spend time with friends from time to time.


I dont really care what Kevin O'Leary or anyone else thinks, humans are social creatures, and once in a while (once or twice a month?) you have to go out or have fun or do something you enjoy or you'll get burnt out and hate life.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

NicoleMarie

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I honestly think it depends on the person's preferences/values. I personally believe in work life balance because I have some anxiety and don't want my health to suffer just because I wanted to get 1 more thing done. Some people are just workaholics. I still think we need SOME fun and breaks. Remember, "There's always more work you can do." Know when to stop before you burn out. I'm not saying slack off; I still work like 15 hours a day every day, but I kinda pop in and out while doing other things. It's true that you'll be better off mentally and physically if you take breaks, and those breaks can include whatever you like to do.
 
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Formless

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Once a week/once every two weeks.

Don't look for the someone else's 'right answer.' Define your goals with ruthless precision and build your life around them.
 

Rcaraway1989

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Working 24/7 is BULLSHIT. Even 12 hours a day is silly.

There's countless studies showing productivity falls off the more you work. Working long hours doesn't make you more successful -- working smarter hours does.

That being said, sacrificing is part of the game. Don't hang out with uninspiring people. I've several older "friends" who try to guilt me into going drinking -- sorry, not only am I not going drinking, I'm not answering your calls anymore.
 

Royael

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I think, the most important thing is to do productive work even if its just 3 hours a day. I don't see any reason for working 12 hours if the efficiency of this work is bad.

Therefore I spend about 1 day a week doing things I would sum up as "hanging out".
 
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G

Guest24480

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Probably an hour a day. No need to isolate yourself socially in my opinion. Let go for an hour and designate 1 hour of "do whatever" time per day and it could increase your productivity for those hours you are working.
 

RBefort

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I yell at myself for wanting to go play golf once a week with them. Not only because i dont have a "job," but because i have several self-fulfillment ideas i should be working on....working out, reading, poker, SOMETHING that gets me one step further than where i am now. Hanging with friends is like buying new clothes...fun for the time, but regret it short while later a lot.
 

ShadowX

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How do you guys work to avoid losing social skills but stay hard working at same time?
 
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mentalic

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I spend usually at most around 4h/week with careful selected friends. However, I usually spend a couple of hours daily with my girlfriend. It helps me to keep everything in balance.
 
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FionaS

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I don't. We drive up to my parents every couple weekends, but that's about it. Hard to make friends stuck at home with toddlers, with no car. ;)

I do think that we are all social creatures, though, and need that outlet somewhere. Weeks that I just stay at home, I feel a lot more stressed out and unhappier. Weeks that I at least go to Toastmasters or where I know I'm headed to my parents, I tend to do a lot better and get a lot more done. And I also have my husband to chat with on the days he gets home at a reasonable time. :)
 

Waisec

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I can't help but worry that by isolating myself, I'm harming my social interaction & communication skills, my ability to develop rapport & trust, and to overall create long-term friendships. I'm also labelled "anti-social" by my fellow peers. "That guy...he never goes out and never hangs out with us."
You reminded me of a quote in Charles Bukowski's book Factotum. It goes like this:

“If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery--isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you'll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you're going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It's the only good fight there is.”

...Isolation IS the gift. Not having constant headwinds - friends, girlfriends, relatives telling you what to do with your life. Not having people telling you what you're doing "wrong", telling you to get a real job, asking how your business is doing every 2 days. F*ck all of those guys, it's an absolute BLISS to work on your own without putting up with the shit you get from normal people.

And to the person here worried about losing your social skills... No you won't, unless you decide to disappear into the Siberian wilderness for a few decades and live off the land. I lift weights regularly and talk to acquaintances/friends there. When I go grocery shopping, I'll do small talk with the cashier. I don't care what business you got, you still have to communicate with people. Or if you're that worried, make new friends, friends who get who you are and what you want to accomplish in life
 
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hotshot

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I've spent maybe 4 hours "hanging out" over the last 6 months.

Since then I've met some incredible people off this forum, and finally gotten a profitable biz going.

You don't have to give up social interaction altogether. I make a point of chatting people up everywhere I go.

Just hang in there. I can tell you first hand, it's worth the sacrifice and you're on the right track. This is the desert of desertion baby. It's not easy going against the grain.
 

Wuz

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Business is not a monotonous and predictable activity.


There will be days where you re in the top and you may have the luxury of being able to going out.

And there will be days where you have to work, otherwise your business fall down.

Balance in a start up is not a common word for several reasons.


You either a choose a balanced life or not.
 
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MaximusAurelius

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The attitude I so commonly see here about how you have to sacrifice your relationships to be successful is the biggest BS I've heard in the entrepreneurial circles. You don't have to do it, and in fact, is counter-productive to creating an amazing business.

You know what's the best productivity tool? Being HAPPY. If you're slaving away for 16 hours a day trying to "make it", then you're sacrificing happiness now for happiness later and you'll start to drain yourself big time. You'll burn out. But when you're happy and living a balanced lifestyle (eating healthy & having great relationships add to that balance), then you can go as fast as you want with your business.

That doesn't mean that you don't spend 12-16 hour days when you need it. Every entrepreneur needs to know how to hustle. I've certainly had weeks like that, and it feels great to go after my dreams like that.

But if that's your BASE state, then you're doing something wrong. Delegate those tasks you don't need to do. Learn how to manage a team. 80/20 your business and become more productive by doing the business tasks that generate revenue and dump the rest. As Tim Ferriss says, if you're stressed out working all the time, you're being lazy by not figuring out how to better manage your time.

Elon Musk says something along the lines of "if you want to be a successful entrepreneur, you have to work 100 hour weeks for years and years" or some shit like that. Is he a successful entrepreneur? Sure, if you discount his failed marriages and neglected relationships. That's unfair for me to say, really, because I don't know Elon personally and that's all just stuff I've heard from the grapevine. Regardless, I don't think it's necessary to sacrifice awesome areas of your life to 'make it big'.

On average I spend 2-4 hours a day with my social circle. These guys and gals INSPIRE THE HELL OUT OF ME. They are all entrepreneurs, business owners, coaches, thought leaders, and overall inspiring people. Every time I come back from going out with them, I feel MORE inspired to concentrate on my business and grow it. Going out also helps me connect with the people that I want, and I've turned those long-term relationships into amazing client relationships as well.

I go to dinner parties once a week. I go out to hookah 2x per week and have masterminds there with my crew. I go on dates regularly.

And the more I block out my time for social events, the better my life gets. Life is about who you share your experiences with...and if you forget to develop relationships with people that 1) help you grow and 2) you have a F*ck ton of fun with, then in my opinion you're missing out on the biggest pleasure of life.

I believe that we entrepreneurs can have it all. Amazing relationships. Thriving financial growth. Beautiful life and learning experiences...

And we don't have to wait to have them. We can have them all right now.
 

SeanKelly

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smarty

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Apparently most of us rarely go out and are in some way socially isolated, sometimes even using "building my business" as an excuse to not go out. I personally have f*cked up in the past by being too much of an introvert, even shy and now that I have recovered in many levels, I have 2-3 friends that I will hang out sometimes but that's not regular. I'm not a big fan of clubs and loudy places but hanging out almost everyday is necessary to keep a balance with the work and stuff.
Right now I'm just trying to open up to more people to make new friends. Because if we don't work to expand our circle of friends, our current circle will always get smaller and smaller. Someone will get married, another may move to another city and we soon become alone.
Just like in business, if it's not growing, it's dying.

Sent from my bathroom using Tapatalk 2 ;)
 
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