The Entrepreneur Forum | Financial Freedom | Starting a Business | Motivation | Money | Success

Welcome to the only entrepreneur forum dedicated to building life-changing wealth.

Build a Fastlane business. Earn real financial freedom. Join free.

Join over 80,000 entrepreneurs who have rejected the paradigm of mediocrity and said "NO!" to underpaid jobs, ascetic frugality, and suffocating savings rituals— learn how to build a Fastlane business that pays both freedom and lifestyle affluence.

Free registration at the forum removes this block.

HOW DO YOU GET OVER FEARS

A detailed account of a Fastlane process...

Mattie

Platinum Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Rat-Race Escape!
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
129%
May 28, 2014
3,485
4,490
53
U.S.
How you get past the fears? Fear is an illusion. You're afraid of the outcome. The outcome isn't anything to fear. It's just an illusion. Uncertainty is really no knowing what to expect. What can you expect? Where ever you land, you'll land in a safe place. You'll have negative naysayers and judgmental people whether you succeed or fail. They will always exist, and it is their issue. Why allow them to be an excuse not to succeed? You're the biggest obstacle in your life. When you have that negative thought and fear in your head, validate it, acknowledge it, and say thanks, and do it anyway. That's what i usually do, because I know the thought stems from someone else, which was planted there by some negative person. It's an excuse not to succeed.

You can still be scared, you just push through it, and move and act. Usually you find out, there was nothing to fear. Failure just teaches you what you need to adjust and change to succeed. It's all in your mindset.
 

P3HSB

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
198%
Sep 27, 2014
222
440
Los Angeles, CA
You need to toughen up. Become stoic as they say.

What is fear? Fear is an emotion induced by a threat which causes the activation of the fight-or-flight response. You only have 3 options. Fight, flight, or Freeze.

You cannot eliminate fear because fear is hardwired in the human brain. However, you can manage your fears.

Really dig deep down and analyze your fears. Chances are you are not being attacked by a tiger. Being attacked by a tiger will cause real fear which is stimulus happening in the present.

Your fear of uncertainty and failure regarding life or business are mental images created by your thoughts. Fear in response to self created mental images of uncertainty or failure are stimulus happening in the future.

Guess what..future and past do not exist. The anticipation (future moment) of a stimulus regarding failure has stifled you and caused a freeze response in your body.

Solution? Eckhart Tolle said it best. Become Present. There is no anticipation in the present moment therefore reducing anxiety, fear, nervousness and stress. You don't look ahead, rather you take one step at a time. Start by entering the world of the Unmanifested. Here is an excerpt from "The Power of Now"...

"Do you hear that dog barking in the distance? Or that car passing by? Listen carefully. Can you feel the presence of the Unmanifested in that? You can' t? Look for it in the silence out of which the sounds come and into which they return. Pay more attention to the silence than to the sounds. Paying attention to outer silence creates inner silence: the mind becomes still. A portal is opening up. All you have to do is pay attention to it. Even during a conversation, become conscious of the gaps between words, the brief silent intervals between sentences. As you do that, the dimension of stillness grows within you. You cannot pay attention to silence without simultaneously becoming still within. Silence without, stillness within. You have entered the Unmanifested."

(Note: meditation helps with this)

Once you enter this realm and you are at peace with yourself, calm, relaxed and energized, you will now be able to take righteous actions towards your end goal.

As for your uncertainty, here is the direction you should follow if you want the "good life". Your end goal should be focused on Health, Wealth, Love, Happiness and Higher Purpose. Nothing more.

Toughen up and face your fears. You'll love who you become.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.
Last edited:

RogueInnovation

Gold Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
170%
Jul 28, 2013
1,278
2,177
Nimzovich has a strategy in chess called "restrain, blockade, destroy".

First HALT their advantage, second develop an effective blockade, then pursue BEHIND the attack.

In reality, I first APPLY all resistance, I make the opposing moves (not act passive)
I then coordinate a description of the fear and its off shoots (pay attention to its reaching implications)
Then I assess with the aim of a better foundation (put in place counter measures that create problems for them if they push)

Then when they push, they get poked
This stems AGGRESSION in an opponent

Thats the first step.

Now onto the second...

Fear inside YOU is this mess of unknowns. Eventually you need to realise that all you fear to lose, can only be cured by risking its loss.
In chess for example, each piece you move can be LOST, so do you do nothing?
Do you freeze in place and act complacent and give them turns to get more active on the board than you?
Do you aggressively follow convention like a kings pawn opening?
Or do you act rediculous like the grob attack?

No... You understand that lost pieces initiate transitions IN THE GAME
Losing pawns infront of the king initiates the end game
Losing queen and rooks initiate the end game
And if they are a viscious midgame player this is good to know

Losing two or three pieces, or moving outside pawns gets you into the middle game faster

Smart players, understand that losses when equally met are ADVANTAGOUS transitions.

The question is not IF you lose a piece but WHEN and under what conditions. So you have to learn that losing what you fear to lose is necessary in order to protect what you fear to lose.


Thirdly,
In business sometimes you cannot RISK, because it is your life on the line, your reputation, your self confidence.
So you feel stuck, and become paralysed by fear of CRITICAL loss.
The trick here is to "reduce threats" by FACING THEM.

Threats are at their most critical upon FIRST examination.
If your mind is not BROKEN by this threat, you will find a way to scale down the threat one inch at a time.

Forth,
Establish process
Mine wealth
And constantly get back in touch with the danger

Its tempting to want to wrap yourself up and hide away, but this is not a solution.
Internal courage is the only lasting solution.
Most people LIE about how comfortable they are, be honest, so that you keep track of how you feel and can spot when things did not work as well as they should have.



I sit with my fear.
I am present with it at all times.
I do not run.
This is how you learn.

Funniest_Memes_i-must-not-fear-fear-is-the-mind-killer_12546.jpeg


In short
BLOCKADE
KEEP AWARE
RISK WHAT YOU FEAR WHEN ADVANTAGEOUS TO PROTECT IT

walk_away_human_540.jpg


Its not always as tough as it looks
 
Last edited:

Jam Wheel

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
130%
Jul 14, 2014
77
100
UK/US/SE
How you get past the fears? Fear is an illusion. You're afraid of the outcome. The outcome isn't anything to fear. It's just an illusion. Uncertainty is really no knowing what to expect. What can you expect? Where ever you land, you'll land in a safe place. You'll have negative naysayers and judgmental people whether you succeed or fail. They will always exist, and it is their issue. Why allow them to be an excuse not to succeed? You're the biggest obstacle in your life. When you have that negative thought and fear in your head, validate it, acknowledge it, and say thanks, and do it anyway. That's what i usually do, because I know the thought stems from someone else, which was planted there by some negative person. It's an excuse not to succeed.

You can still be scared, you just push through it, and move and act. Usually you find out, there was nothing to fear. Failure just teaches you what you need to adjust and change to succeed. It's all in your mindset.

Every time I have acknowledged the fear and done something anyway, it has always turned out right. Its when you acknowledge the fear and let it fester without action that you have problems. Its the fertile soil in which negative thoughts grow.
 

Yasai

Bronze Contributor
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
100%
Aug 26, 2014
103
103
13
Acquire competence, then acquire confidence.
If you know how to do something, you won't be afraid to do it. Or at least not to the point where you freeze up.

Most people feel uncertainty when they first try to learn something, like riding a bike.
"Learning to ride a bike" brings with it the very real possibility of falling and hurting yourself.
And yes, you will have to go through that "wobbly" phase at the beginning.

But what happens once you know how to ride a bike? Once it has become second nature?
Exactly: You can do it no-hands, listening to music while browsing on your phone in one hand and eating a banana in the other. Without even really thinking about it.
That's confidence that stems from competence, which stems from routine/repetition/practice.

And yeah, riding "no-hands" totally means you're competent! Like... really! uhh...

Anyway, I'd credit Jack Canfield for that whole mindset of "tolerating the wobbly phase".
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Edgesavvy

New Contributor
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
33%
Oct 1, 2014
6
2
49
Hey,
I've been working on these issues with people for years, and unfortunately, there is no 1 way to cure it all - fear, anxiety, insecurity, uncertainty.. whatever that emotion you want to call it. You have to dig deep to get rid of those "roadblocks" and you have to really WANT to change things. If you don't, no matter what you do, you'll end up in the same place over and over again.

Though it is "normal" to have some fears, a lot of those fears (like fear of failure, constant anxiety that things may go wrong or that you cannot do smth) get in our lives big way & stop us from moving forward, make us feel like failures or not worthy.

I have developed this doc (pdf) a little while ago for the presentation on the exact same issues. So read it to just have a better understanding how to deal with those emotions (you may ignore the last page). I couldn't upload as it is too large, but here is the link to the pdf file http://bit.ly/1rPd3nd or send me a message with your email and I can email it to you.

Private me.. I'd love to give you some tips to help you move from this "beat up" place. Everyone can do it, just sometimes we all need a little help or push.
 

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
Read the 50th Law by Robert Greene.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

sle3pyguii

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
121%
Aug 19, 2012
340
411
I might be weird but I've noticed a pattern about myself (this might be for you also):

Whenever I fear something, there's always this small window of time where I think "F this...I'm gonna do it" before all the fear washes it over and I'm overcome by fear again. It's a fairly small window, usually lasting less than a minute. I've taught myself that as soon as that window opens, I go for it. Don't look back.

Of course, this only works if I properly thought it through first and am terrified of the execution part.
 

Ninjakid

Platinum Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
217%
Jun 23, 2014
1,936
4,206
Buddy Guy Eh
First, you recognize and except that fear is a natural emotion that Mother Nature saw fit to implant within you for your own survival.

Second, you PRACTICE courage. Don't philosophize about courage and try to justify why you're too afraid to take action. PRACTICE courage.
If you've been too afraid to talk to a girl, go do it.
If you've been too afraid to start a business, go start one.
If you've been to afraid to tell your parents that you have no interest in going to college, go tell them.

And understand that you build courge the same way you build muscle: by exercising. Just like you push your muscles to the max to build them, push your courage to the max to build it.
 

Edgesavvy

New Contributor
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
33%
Oct 1, 2014
6
2
49
It is easier said than done.. a lot of people experience physical side effects of anxiety and really need to be taken step by step thru each fear/inecurity.
but Ninjakid - you're on the right track! keep it up! :)
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Ninjakid

Platinum Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
217%
Jun 23, 2014
1,936
4,206
Buddy Guy Eh
It is easier said than done.. a lot of people experience physical side effects of anxiety and really need to be taken step by step thru each fear/inecurity.
but Ninjakid - you're on the right track! keep it up! :)
Aye, thanks for the positivity. You're right, deep-rooted anxiety manifests itself physically and evokes a much bigger problem.
My suggestions only work for people who are in the midst of doing something and merely plagued by second guessing. For acute anxiety, it would be best to get professional help.

Keeping in mind, I am not a therapist/psychiatrist
 

Edgesavvy

New Contributor
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
33%
Oct 1, 2014
6
2
49
I am not a therapist/psychiatrist either! :) But the methods are proven to work, and yours can too.
You need to understand that sometimes a person on side (even a stranger) can give an advice, encouragement, or inspiration you've been seeking for for months or years.
 

Mattie

Platinum Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Rat-Race Escape!
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
129%
May 28, 2014
3,485
4,490
53
U.S.
Every time I have acknowledged the fear and done something anyway, it has always turned out right. Its when you acknowledge the fear and let it fester without action that you have problems. Its the fertile soil in which negative thoughts grow.

I think in my experience anyway, I believe there's a difference between dwelling on fear, thoughts, emotions, and feelings, and acknowledging that they're there. In my experience I know the fear is there, I know the thought is there, the emotion is there, and the feeling. I suppose I've just disciplined myself enough to know it is what it is. It's there, not to dwell on, nor act on. So for me I've just learned to be the observer, acknowledge, validate, and let it go. It might not be the same for someone else.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.
D

DeletedUser8

Guest
How you get past the fears? Fear is an illusion. You're afraid of the outcome. The outcome isn't anything to fear. It's just an illusion. Uncertainty is really no knowing what to expect. What can you expect? Where ever you land, you'll land in a safe place. You'll have negative naysayers and judgmental people whether you succeed or fail. They will always exist, and it is their issue. Why allow them to be an excuse not to succeed? You're the biggest obstacle in your life. When you have that negative thought and fear in your head, validate it, acknowledge it, and say thanks, and do it anyway. That's what i usually do, because I know the thought stems from someone else, which was planted there by some negative person. It's an excuse not to succeed.

You can still be scared, you just push through it, and move and act. Usually you find out, there was nothing to fear. Failure just teaches you what you need to adjust and change to succeed. It's all in your mindset.

Thank you for this, screenshotted for future reference.
 

Zen Focus

Silver Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
743%
Feb 11, 2011
82
609
You get over fears, when you own your life, and own it fully.

Oftentimes, it takes a choice to stop being fearful.

Accept the fact that your choices have led you to where you are, and don't regret them. That's the beginning.

If you realize you made the wrong choices, then own up to it and start making the right ones.

A lot of people don't realize that the path to Fast Lane is a path of living true to yourself.

When you're true to yourself, and you feel alive from being so, what are bad times? Own your feelings fully, and own your actions fully.

However you live, consciously make choices, and don't regret them. If there's something you're unprepared for, make a choice to get better at it by learning and practicing on it.

In either case, to stop feeling fearful, start making conscious choices.
 

RHL

The coaching was a joke guys.
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Read Fastlane!
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
747%
Oct 22, 2013
1,484
11,082
PA/NJ
You can reduce fears by dodging the worst-case scenario, but the only way to vanquish them is to survive it.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Zen Focus

Silver Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
743%
Feb 11, 2011
82
609
Sometimes you fail, or experience disappointments from your choices, and that's alright.

Because you consciously made the choice to do what you did.

And learning from failures only makes you stronger.

Consciously choosing to make the choices you make every second, is what will make you feel alive.
 

randomnumber314

speed of a drunk camel
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Fastlane!
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
227%
Jan 7, 2014
1,003
2,279
Minnesoooota,USA
Put yourself in a situation where you have to face the fear. So if you fear failure, get into a situation where not performing an action would result in failure.

I'd say it's the same response to many questions around here: take action.
 

T14

Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
161%
Sep 16, 2013
56
90
Surround yourself with people who have done or are doing what you're interested in doing. After you've spent some time with these people, you'll realize that they're human, full of emotions, insecurities, and fears just like you are. You'll begin to understand that everyone has fear. Winners just act in spite of it.

Start building a solid team of like-minded people who can provide you with the answers to the questions you don't know. You don't know what you don't know. They'll help you with this.

I teamed up with my real estate mentor 2 years ago. I wanted to flip houses and get into rentals. I did 3 flips with him before he told me he didn't think I was "committed enough" when I showed up a half hour late one day and let me go. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.

I went out and got my OWN license. Raised my OWN private money. Built my OWN team, and started making my OWN offers.

Today I just received my first accepted offer on a HUD home. I'll make a chunk of change from this one and then it's on to the next.

"Fear" is only as real as you make it.

Learn the basics first. Find others who are successfully doing it. Partner with them or tweak their systems. Do it on your own.

Profit.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

early riser

Grind Harder
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
126%
Sep 18, 2014
54
68
Both coasts. The west now.
What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?

Now realize fear controls that failure.


If that isn't motivation as to what is stopping you in life, I don't know what is.
You're going to have to overcome it.

-Early Riser
 
Last edited:

Peakdesire

Burning Desire to Succeed
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
58%
May 16, 2014
372
217
A book you might want to read is The 50th law by Robert Greene. I thought it was outstanding. All about overcoming your fears. Great perspectives and awesome writing.

Check it out.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Silverhawk851

Platinum Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
482%
Sep 22, 2012
861
4,154
Toronto/Traveling
"F*ck it."

+

"No one makes it out alive anyways, why not"

=

No F*cks given
 

Tom.V

Tom
FASTLANE INSIDER
Read Fastlane!
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
237%
Feb 20, 2012
977
2,314
34
San Juan
Risk your life (literally) for money. So long as you survive, everything else is cake.
 

Post New Topic

Please SEARCH before posting.
Please select the BEST category.

Post new topic

Guest post submissions offered HERE.

Latest Posts

New Topics

Fastlane Insiders

View the forum AD FREE.
Private, unindexed content
Detailed process/execution threads
Ideas needing execution, more!

Join Fastlane Insiders.

Top