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Dealing with Passive Aggressive / Ungrateful people

Discussion in 'General Entrepreneurship and Startup' started by AroundTheWorld, Nov 19, 2009.

  1. AroundTheWorld
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    AroundTheWorld Be in the Moment Staff Member FASTLANE INSIDER Read The Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    Any ideas or strategies you would like to share?
    ;)


  2. lightweight99
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    lightweight99 10 kph

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    I can stay calm as long they don't get in my face. Once they start disrespecting me then it's best to just turn your back to them. Rather then getting in yelling matches and fist fights I find turning your back to someone to be a huge insult.

    My strategy is to stay calm, getting angry might make you say things that could end up hurting you or making you regret
  3. Cat Man Du
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    Cat Man Du 20 kph

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    prayer !
  4. yveskleinsky
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    yveskleinsky 120 kph FASTLANE INSIDER Read The Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    I suppose it depends in what capacity they are in my life. Family, friend or at work? I don't have any friends that are passive aggressive, I have had coworkers and employees in the past that were passive aggressive, and I suppose as a whole I look at it like they are either uncomfortable confronting me or they are trying to stir the pot and cause drama. If they are uncomfortable confronting me, then I go to great lengths to let them know that they can come to me with questions, comments, concerns or frustrations and I promise to hear them out and that we will still be on good terms afterwards. If I get the sense that they are stirring the pot, I disassociate myself as quickly as possible from them.

    As far as ungrateful people go, I suppose I just chalk it up to either them being bitter or having an entitlement mentality and then move on.
  5. hakrjak
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    hakrjak 60 kph Read The Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    Cut them out of your life completely. People like that generally don't change.

    Had a rough spot in the past couple years with a family member who took this to the extreme. She is no longer a part of our lives, although the offer is there to make up any time she is willing to change.

    - Hakrjak
  6. yveskleinsky
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    yveskleinsky 120 kph FASTLANE INSIDER Read The Millionaire Fastlane Speedway Pass

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    How about dealing with plain ol' fashioned aggressive people? ...I just got home after a run in today with a seller of a car I was looking at buying. Long story short he threatened me, then tells me he knows people that killed people for $500...implying he was going to have me killed. Seriously, I have about had it with this town. This is my 4th run in with crazy people here in a month. ...I did a pretty good job of not totally flipping out, although "Daniqua" did rear her head for about 10 minutes. ...I am REALLY trying to apply this whole nonjudgment of events thing, did a pretty good job overall. Serenity now! lol
  7. rcardin
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    rcardin 20 kph

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    Concealed Handgun License if your state allows it. Tends to take away the edge.
  8. BoOmBa
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    BoOmBa 15 kph

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    In my experience when it comes to dealing with passive agressive people, I have found that by calling them on their behavior usually works pretty well.

    This approch may not work for others, I do not know. I have always been a strait shooter and people know I am not affraid to stand up for myself or others.

    I may be wrong in saying this but when I see people acting passive agressive it usually signals to me that they are a bit weak and insecure as they are to afraid to say whats really on their mind. By calling them on their beavior while in the moment they are forced to either address the issue at hand, in which case we can work on resolving it in a reasonable manner or they back down compleatly as they realise they are been unreasonable and dont have a foot to stand on when they are in a position where they have to justify their actions.

    When it comes to rude people I usually do two things, 1st) call them on their behavior (which alot of the time I've found people dont realise their been rude and quickly change their behavior and are actually greatfull for you making them aware) or if that dosent work b) i talk back to them they way they talk to me or others, which I've had mixed results with, either they get what im doing and adjust they way they are speaking, or they go away... so either way in my mind its a win win.

    Agressive people are another story. Best advice I could give here is dont get emmotional, keep your cool and talk in a calm voice and show you are un affected by their behavior. Basicly try and avoid these people wherever possible and dont allow yourself to get sucked into their argument cause with these people situations can escilate very fast...

    hope this helps :tiphat:
  9. mainstreet
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    mainstreet 5 kph

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    Ignore them. A few years back I had a guy that wanted to return a car charger after he used it for an ten minutes in the parking lot to charge his phone (when he bought it my manager told him no refunds and stamped his reciept no refund becuase the guy told him upfront he just needed to get a number and make a call) and he sat in our store for 2 hours waiting to get a refund, quietly. He got loud once when another customer was buying a car charger and I told him I would call the cops for trespass if he didnt quiet down. Lunchtime came and I bought him pizza with the rest of us. After he ate, he meekly left. I know - as a business owner it wasnt worth the 20 bucks to piss the guy off, but you arent in business until you have a least a few inapropriate battles. Looking back - quite possibly that is my worst customer service story ever, but well worth the cost because I'm still in business and the customer and I can laugh about it now (he did come back in a few weeks later and apologized probably because he needed something else and didnt want to drive 30 minutes to the closest place to get it. We didnt stamp his receipt that time.)

    Startup Help
  10. Knightsman
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    Knightsman 20 kph Read The Millionaire Fastlane

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    This works perfect for me as well. Only really had issues in the workplace. Someone gets upset about something, or they think they were treated unfairly and want to go all over site and tell everyone except come talk to you about it.

    Standing up to people sometimes is the best way to get along in the workplace.
  11. Knightsman
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    Knightsman 20 kph Read The Millionaire Fastlane

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    No offense, but couldnt you have just let him borrow the charger in the store, while he made the call?

    Would have done a couple of things, made him happy, with the possibility of telling other hey this store is really nice, two you would not have had the return issue, and three, you wouldnt have had to buy him pizza to get rid of him.
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