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Should I thrive for balance or stay true to myself?

Topics relating to managing people and relationships

Sisyphus

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So I recently joined a group of 5 other guys working on a start-up. We are all college students, so we go out and drink a lot. I am a pretty introverted guy. I really don't see the benefits of these social events nor do I particularly enjoy them. I would much rather stay behind and work on my own projects.

But I am not awkward, shy or anything like that. In fact I would say I am the leader of this team right now. I understand that the ability to perform and shine under these situations are certainly useful. But should this really be a skill I should consciously cultivate given that I am already very confident? Perhaps a bigger question is the interpersonal skills in general. Should I focus on what makes me unique and keep doing the things I do, things that are kinda eccentric? Or should I balance out and learn the language of my immediate surroundings?
 
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Sisyphus

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Yea I understand that to build a successful business you need to make sacrifices. That's what I have been doing. But now I'm beginning to think that most since people aren't as committed to success as you are. They aren't work 80 hours a week. And in the path to success you eventually have to interact with these people, perhaps very frequently. So maybe being too indulged in my own work will make me too one-sided, and not being able to see the possibilites that may arise from these casual interactions
 

Waisec

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You're not going to suddenely develop asperger's by working harder than 'most people'
 
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JordanK

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Ask yourself what the opportunity cost is of you going out drinking. For example whenever I want to go out with my friends I look firstly at the time I'm going out (normally 10pm-3am). Would I be doing anything during this time to further myself and my business? The second question then is the morning.. what would you be doing that morning? Obviously if you have a big business meeting or a call with a client you will choose to get a good nights sleep and not go out. However if there isn't much happening then my advice would be to go out drinking. As much as I want to be successful and grow my business it's nice to sometimes let off steam and enjoy life.
 

7.62x51

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The higher up the mountain you climb (or further down the rabbit hole you go), the more specific the problems become to you and your situation and the less resources you'll find to guide you through.

Learn to trust your gut with smaller problems and it'll be your most valuable resource when you come across bigger ones.
 

LateStarter

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I get what a lot of the replies here are saying, but going out for drinks with the coworkers isn't entirely wasteful and it certainly isn't going to cause your business to fail (or be less successful). There is some value in the socializing with coworkers, particularly when working with partners.

I would caution against you abstaining from these events entirely since the natural conversation between people can ebb and flow around work, social, home life, etc. With a shared, mutual goal the partners are in essence also customers of one another. Your success depends on theirs.

This socializing is an opportunity for you to easily get to know these customers on a more intimate (but non-sexual ;)) level. I'm not recommending that you sacrifice your values or make great compromises to follow along on each and every drink up, only that you strive to find balance.
 
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