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Dealing with women on the workfloor.

Topics relating to managing people and relationships

Durete

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Hello fellow people.

Currently I am in a job, where we luckely work a lot as solo-action takers; I'm an entertainer/activities staff at a cruise ship
Now, often I run into one specific problem, SOMEWHERE during my 7 month contract.
Note: A contract is working 210 days in a row.

This one problem is that somehow I always get into a fight with one of the girls in the team, and then she turns it around and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy. This happened to 2 teams so far in the last 3 years.
To the extend that one of the girls accused me of sexual harassment....

Just to know about my personality:
I'm a typical dutch person.
- Very straight forward. (No hidden agenda, straightforward communication)
- Individual
- High intellect, High social skills- with the guests- somehow low social skills with crew/other employee's

Situation this time for example:

There are 3 people involved.
Girl A, Girl B and me.

Girl A and I are often having some banter going on and making fun of eachother in front of the guests at the cruise ship.
At one day there was a gameshow that involved several games, 2 of them where:
- Keychain race. where the guests put a keychain in their a$$ and run to a cup and drop it in.
- Balloon challenge, guests pop balloons on eachohter in a relay race. 1: Belly to belly 2: Back to back 3: Side to side 4: On the lap, 5: Doggie style.

So she got me to do the keychain in the a$$ as example, so I used her as an example for the balloon relay...where I actually popped the balloon on the last challenge (Doggie style)
It was alright and we had fun with it.

Next Girl B comes back from vacation, decides it 's her place to take revenge for Girl A.
So made me do the Keychain and balloon race several times and made me pop the balloon doggiestyle on a guest. if I didn't do it she would literally argue infront of 500+ guests.

Now I decided that enough's enough, so I set it up so she would do the balloon example one time. what followed was a discussion on stage.... and she reporting me for sexual harassment and inapriopiate behavior. while I finally just did back what she did several times.

Now the manager of my manager called me to the office and had a go at me.
Ofcourse I don't feel like I did anything wrong, as I did 1 time back what she did 4+ times to me.
But now I am in the chance of getting disciplinary actions taken against me and whatever not.

Now not every contract it goes like this, but at some point every contract I get into a fight with one of the girls. And as straightforward as I am, a fight is just between her and me. I don't involve my manager, my managers manager or anybody else in. and often I end up losing co-workers and whatever not as the girls manage to turn a lot of people against me.

So I want to prevent this in the future...anyone knows any resources or books that help me to learn to evade or even fix situations like this? As I really do not want to get fired...this job is a once in a lifetime job, and if I get promoted(Which is my goal) I would be literally one out of 30 people in the world having this chance...4 months vacation per year, single cabin, cleaner, lots of benefits, travelling the world while getting paid, eating the same food as the guests and more.

(and at the same time I am building up my own online business so I can make enough money on the side to actually enjoy life and awesome excursions/trips/activities while travelling to all these places.)
 
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theag

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Sounds like kindergarten.

I wouldnt put up with shit like that. Throw her off the boat.

My other suggestion involves altering the rules of the doggy style balloon challenge with her but I wont post that.

I also wouldnt continue to work a job where I have to put keychains in my a$$ if I were you. Weird cruises you have going on there.

made me pop the balloon doggiestyle on a guest

epic.
 
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G

GuestUser113

Guest
Hello fellow people.

Currently I am in a job, where we luckely work a lot as solo-action takers; I'm an entertainer/activities staff at a cruise ship
Now, often I run into one specific problem, SOMEWHERE during my 7 month contract.
Note: A contract is working 210 days in a row.

This one problem is that somehow I always get into a fight with one of the girls in the team, and then she turns it around and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy. This happened to 2 teams so far in the last 3 years.
To the extend that one of the girls accused me of sexual harassment....

Just to know about my personality:
I'm a typical dutch person.
- Very straight forward. (No hidden agenda, straightforward communication)
- Individual
- High intellect, High social skills- with the guests- somehow low social skills with crew/other employee's

Situation this time for example:

There are 3 people involved.
Girl A, Girl B and me.

Girl A and I are often having some banter going on and making fun of eachother in front of the guests at the cruise ship.
At one day there was a gameshow that involved several games, 2 of them where:
- Keychain race. where the guests put a keychain in their a$$ and run to a cup and drop it in.
- Balloon challenge, guests pop balloons on eachohter in a relay race. 1: Belly to belly 2: Back to back 3: Side to side 4: On the lap, 5: Doggie style.

So she got me to do the keychain in the a$$ as example, so I used her as an example for the balloon relay...where I actually popped the balloon on the last challenge (Doggie style)
It was alright and we had fun with it.

Next Girl B comes back from vacation, decides it 's her place to take revenge for Girl A.
So made me do the Keychain and balloon race several times and made me pop the balloon doggiestyle on a guest. if I didn't do it she would literally argue infront of 500+ guests.

Now I decided that enough's enough, so I set it up so she would do the balloon example one time. what followed was a discussion on stage.... and she reporting me for sexual harassment and inapriopiate behavior. while I finally just did back what she did several times.

Now the manager of my manager called me to the office and had a go at me.
Ofcourse I don't feel like I did anything wrong, as I did 1 time back what she did 4+ times to me.
But now I am in the chance of getting disciplinary actions taken against me and whatever not.

Now not every contract it goes like this, but at some point every contract I get into a fight with one of the girls. And as straightforward as I am, a fight is just between her and me. I don't involve my manager, my managers manager or anybody else in. and often I end up losing co-workers and whatever not as the girls manage to turn a lot of people against me.

So I want to prevent this in the future...anyone knows any resources or books that help me to learn to evade or even fix situations like this? As I really do not want to get fired...this job is a once in a lifetime job, and if I get promoted(Which is my goal) I would be literally one out of 30 people in the world having this chance...4 months vacation per year, single cabin, cleaner, lots of benefits, travelling the world while getting paid, eating the same food as the guests and more.

(and at the same time I am building up my own online business so I can make enough money on the side to actually enjoy life and awesome excursions/trips/activities while travelling to all these places.)

CLyv65h.jpg
 

cautiouscapy

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Seems to me that you allowed yourself to be set up for this with the sexual innuendo in the balloon game example.

More generally in your job; It's a fine line between harmless banter (where the man and woman respect each other and it's fun) and sexual harassment (where one person is making the other uncomfortable).
As a woman I've experienced all shades of it, though I can't say I've ever felt personally threatened.

Sometimes a man can't judge quite how the woman is perceiving it, it's always subjective depending on both parties.
Do you think this could be a factor? I assume you are an international team. Are you sure you're all operating on the same cultural understanding?

Are the other fights about supposed sexual harassment?

I'm still stuck on "keychain in the a$$" What kind of cruise we talking about here...

Yeah...and how can someone play a game like that (with management approval?) and then cry Sexual Harrasment?
 
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randomnumber314

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How to Win Friends & Influence People might be of help.

Sounds like there's a communication break-down somewhere, sounds like middle school politics. Just rise above it and be nice to everyone. Buy them each a few drinks or a nice meal as friends. Just tamp down the bullshit and turn up the professionalism.
 

Durete

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@Durete how old are you and what sort of jobs have you done before?
Don't see how this is relevant, but sure I'll roll with it:
I'm In my late twenties, always worked in the hospitality/recreation/tourism sector, under different jobs, but mainly guest activities.
Both on management and entree level. (Although I have a hard time getting back to management position in the cruise industry..they don't give a crap about me running the #1 team in such and such company- even while it's about 5 times the size as the cruise line- or leading the best entertainment team to date in one of the world's top hotels.) - if you're wondering why I don't work there anymore: Financial crisis..they require 16-18 hour workdays with little pay, cruise lines pay better. especially at management level.


To some other people wondering how the fights went:
Often I stay professional and nice to them(Saying Hello, good morning, whatever). and I get ignored back, while at the same time they talk behind my back and spread bad words/rumours about me. or go to the management, and then I get big banana's.
At this point I'm actually afraid of getting fired for this situation....

As for how they can play a game like this and then cry sexual harassment..it's really simple, (Sorry ladies...but it's the sad truth) Girls can get away with anything just because they got 2 things that guys don't. and as long as someone has those two things, everything she says must be true.

I've seen guys get fired for kissing a girl on the cheek, while girls sleep with everyone and anyone and are still there.
Girls accusing a guy of sexual harassment and even while proven false...the guy still gets send away.
Girls can literally get away with anything in this world. The company is too afraid to get sued anyway by girls.


As for which cruise line does this sort of games...This is the world's leading cruise line if it comes to entertainment.
 

Threenuc

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Can you form up a team with other people working in the same industry that you know and trust who won't do such things? Obviously, this creates some trouble with getting hired as a whole team, but it kind of also creates more value, since if you're a team you must be on good relations with eachother, which is valuable for your employer.
 

Mattie

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Well being American and Living in the Netherlands now. I can see why women would get you on sexual harassment. You have to understand Dutch are very open, blatant, liberal, and there doesn't seem to be a problem in Dutch society when it comes to expressing verbally any topic on sex even if it's a joke. You didn't say what nationality these women are? Women are funny creatures, and in America the rules are quite different. We wouldn't even have that scenario in the work place. It's just a good sign you will get in trouble with your job. It's not tolerated to even discuss sex.

Women change their mind all the time. And what age are they? This may have to do with maturity and of course you always have women that love to create drama. At the same time you have to understand if you're a man that likes to create drama. Fortunately, some men do like to create drama. Understand in your work environment you create your reality by what actions you display. If you're a leader, or entrepreneur, I don't understand why your example would be to participate in this scenario you have displayed.

This works both ways. Your cause and effect through your verbal language, actions, and whether you know your boundaries, and set boundaries that are appropriate behavior in the work place. There is also there's. If you don't participate of course they will get upset. Either way they will be drama queens. Men are disciplined and leaders, they're supposed to lead the way with boundaries. Fortunately, it sounds like your allowing a bunch of women lead you. Somewhat like a collar around your neck and dragging you around by a chain.

I feel this is more of you becoming a successful person, knowing the what your purpose is, and what your job is. It's not your job to socialize or be best friends with them. And for being Dutch, I do know men around me do carry that leadership ability, are strict, and set boundaries, so somewhere if you're Dutch you must have lost your place. That's just my take on it.
 
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randomnumber314

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You have to understand Dutch are very open, blatant, liberal, and there doesn't seem to be a problem in Dutch society when it comes to expressing verbally any topic on sex even if it's a joke. You didn't say what nationality these women are? Women are funny creatures, and in America the rules are quite different. We wouldn't even have that scenario in the work place. It's just a good sign you will get in trouble with your job. It's not tolerated to even discuss sex.

+1 on this. We had an office of several people from around Europe and one American girl. I had to individually counsel the Europeans about how caged American sexual discussion is, and I had to try to get the American girl to understand cultural differences. It's difficult to get a bunch of cultures to see "eye to eye."
 

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At one day there was a gameshow that involved several games, 2 of them where:
- Keychain race. where the guests put a keychain in their a$$ and run to a cup and drop it in.
- Balloon challenge, guests pop balloons on eachohter in a relay race. 1: Belly to belly 2: Back to back 3: Side to side 4: On the lap, 5: Doggie style.

1. Threads like this make this place less desireable
2. Jobs like yours make people stupider
3. The situation you described is akin to one stripper accusing another stripper of lewd acts
4. No cruise line should have games like that or the cruise line itself could get sued
5. You've been here long enough (three years) to take a long hard look at where your life is headed
6. Your dream job is to be the head keychain a$$ coordinator?
 
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Mattie

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Cultural diversity is important to know especially if your working internationally. And I would say there are pro's and con's to every culture. We just have to accept the differences, learn what is appropriate behavior and what is not. Agree to disagree when we we don't agree. Be open to hearing the other side and know some times in some cases, we can both have a good points aimed toward the same goal. We can both be right but have two different approaches, put them together for the common good.

If you understand human nature is common ground, the only thing we desire is kindness and respect.
 

Mattie

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6. Your dream job is to be the head keychain a$$ coordinator?
Now that's a fascinating job! I suppose it's more like sidewalk lane, instead of fast lane. Three years is a long time to only come up with that one. I didn't even look how long the person's been here. I would say less playing and taking more action.
 

Luffy

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This is too childish, you could have fun and get promoted without all the sexual tension, man you sound thirsty as hell.
 
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MJ DeMarco

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1. Threads like this make this place less desireable
2. Jobs like yours make people stupider
3. The situation you described is akin to one stripper accusing another stripper of lewd acts
4. No cruise line should have games like that or the cruise line itself could get sued
5. You've been here long enough (three years) to take a long hard look at where your life is headed
6. Your dream job is to be the head keychain a$$ coordinator?

You underestimate the propensity of people to do stupid things when in groups, especially when liquor is involved. :mad:
 

Journey2Million$

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The only way to escape being abused at a job and dealing with horrible people is to be self employed. Then you create all your own working conditions. Every job I've had had very aggravating things about them. A couple of jobs were terribly harmful to me. Working in a job is horrible and pathetic. Death is better than working in a job. Never again! Lord Sugar said that after he became a successful entrepreneur, wild horses couldn't drag him back into a job. The #1 reason people become entrepreneurs is because they hate working for other people.
 
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Michał Kóska

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Sounds like kindergarten.

I wouldnt put up with shit like that. Throw her off the boat.

My other suggestion involves altering the rules of the doggy style balloon challenge with her but I wont post that.

I also wouldnt continue to work a job where I have to put keychains in my a$$ if I were you. Weird cruises you have going on there.



epic.

You made my day. Indeed epic post @theag
 
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Durete

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Well being American and Living in the Netherlands now. I can see why women would get you on sexual harassment. You have to understand Dutch are very open, blatant, liberal, and there doesn't seem to be a problem in Dutch society when it comes to expressing verbally any topic on sex even if it's a joke. You didn't say what nationality these women are? Women are funny creatures, and in America the rules are quite different. We wouldn't even have that scenario in the work place. It's just a good sign you will get in trouble with your job. It's not tolerated to even discuss sex.
Actually this is an american company.

The girls however are from England, although the girl that accused me is 31 and originally from russia.

Also, she keeps saying those things about the dutch, but I'm very controlled, and "Restricted' if it comes to those kind of topics.

Women change their mind all the time. And what age are they? This may have to do with maturity and of course you always have women that love to create drama. At the same time you have to understand if you're a man that likes to create drama. Fortunately, some men do like to create drama. Understand in your work environment you create your reality by what actions you display. If you're a leader, or entrepreneur, I don't understand why your example would be to participate in this scenario you have displayed.
Well, either I decide to stick the keychain in my a$$ all the time, or I choose to counter fire sometimes...


This works both ways. Your cause and effect through your verbal language, actions, and whether you know your boundaries, and set boundaries that are appropriate behavior in the work place. There is also there's. If you don't participate of course they will get upset. Either way they will be drama queens. Men are disciplined and leaders, they're supposed to lead the way with boundaries. Fortunately, it sounds like your allowing a bunch of women lead you. Somewhat like a collar around your neck and dragging you around by a chain.
that's how it indeed feels like.
Sadly the whole team, except for me, are female. the boss is female and very feministic. and this is the kind of place where you gotta watch what you say, as everything will be used against you.

I feel this is more of you becoming a successful person, knowing the what your purpose is, and what your job is. It's not your job to socialize or be best friends with them. And for being Dutch, I do know men around me do carry that leadership ability, are strict, and set boundaries, so somewhere if you're Dutch you must have lost your place. That's just my take on it.
Usually I just want to be left alone, do my own thing. I like to be a "Single operator" I'm good at my job, the guests love me. and I love being the person on stage, entertaining tens to hundreds of thousands of people on a yearly basis.


+1 on this. We had an office of several people from around Europe and one American girl. I had to individually counsel the Europeans about how caged American sexual discussion is, and I had to try to get the American girl to understand cultural differences. It's difficult to get a bunch of cultures to see "eye to eye."

Usually, it works quite well. after all; I got colleague's from over 75 different nationalities that I work with on a daily basis.
1. Threads like this make this place less desireable
A guy asking for help in a certain sticky position makes this place less desirable?

2. Jobs like yours make people stupider
Tbh, I'm a fairly intelligent guy. (statistically seen someone has 1% chance to have a higher intellect than I have.)
This job is a job that involves a lot of different things, I would say that the people that have worked in my job, and took it as a serious job, are way ahead of most people in the world.
Some things we deal with on a daily basis:
- Stress
- Long hours working(In fact, I've been working every single day since august. usual day starts at 8:45 am and finishes at midnight.)
- working with different nationalities
- Emergencies (Anywhere from fire's, cyclones, terrorists, bomb threats, missing people, people wanting to jump, finding out that guests get abused at home, piracy and well..whatever you can think of)
- Working together with high-end organizations (CSI, FBI, Marines, Navy etc if in need of protection.)
- Dealing yearly with hundreds of thousands of guests, from different backgrounds, nationalities, and personalities.
- Learning to communicate clearly in different languages, don't speak the language? No problem..you can still communicate with them.)
- Learning to read universal body language.
- Learning to never quit.
- Learning a lot of skills in a short time. (Since of that being more well-rounded than anyone that worked on land.)
- Learning to become a teacher. I just read something ? I can teach it. I've just seen someone do a movement or do a dance? I can teach it.
- Knowing first response skills such as: Firefighting, rescue swimming, medical care, psychological care, security threats and more.
- Being responsible for thousands of life.(My best "Emergency duty" Was being the sole responsible person for 2400 lifes.)
and well... a lot more.
- Being able to handle yourself in foreign environments, where you literally know nobody, and nobody knows your culture.
- Learning ways to cut costs, become more effective and save the environment at the same time.
- Learning to find a way to do your job, no matter what obstacles are in front of you.
I would say that people that have worked in the cruise industry, have had the chance to learn all the skills and gained the experience to become the perfect employee's/employers/entrepreneur.

(Currently there are several articles floating around on Linkedin talking about why every business should hire people that used to work on cruise ships for a while, and that's for a good reason.)

All the above, and more is easy for me, the only problem I got is pissing off managers.(Since I give them feedback, and communicate directly instead of through all kinds of wrinkles...some can handle it, some can not...remember this is a culture where people have big personalities and even bigger Ego's, like with any other entertainers.) or pissing off girls in the team once in a while.
So for my one weakness I'm looking for help/ways to overcome that.
But yea, sure, these threads lower the value of this site(Lol.)

3. The situation you described is akin to one stripper accusing another stripper of lewd acts
I'm not even going to respond to this rediculous claim.

4. No cruise line should have games like that or the cruise line itself could get sued
Guess what, they all have. We also have a lot more "Mature" and "Adult" events, one is an adult scavenger hunt where the guests dress one guy up as a woman, while not wearing any pants or a shirt. Or a girl showing a tattoo or a piercing not in the ear. (I've seen especially the Americans go all out by showing their breasts, going naked, flashing a nipple or "downstairs" piercing to get a point and more.... even while Americans are "Prude" when it comes to talking, they are the most outgoing if it involves a game show.)

In the end; I'm an adult entertainer. lots of people want 18+ content. so we will give it to them, as if not they will go to the competition.
Next to that we also offer more mild activities for the people that cannot handle adult/mature events.

5. You've been here long enough (three years) to take a long hard look at where your life is headed

I want to become a cruise director, get the experience, work for a few TV stations during vacation and in the end own my own high entertainment holiday resort chain. I know where I want to go. I know mostly how to get there. one major step is to become an activities manager, followed by cruise director on the best cruise line in the world to get so far ahead of any competition that has not been in that position. and also to get me in situations where I can find investors as building something like that will require massive funds.

In the meantime, I'm practicing/building a little side company to provide extra funds.
6. Your dream job is to be the head keychain a$$ coordinator?
Nope, to be the best entertainer around (for now)
My position is already one of the most wanted positions for entertainers/MC's/hosts worldwide.
And the simple truth is: People(Especially Americans) Love the corny/sexual stuff that we let them do at game shows. I've seen more American girls strip totally naked in front of 500-1000 people or more than I can remember...depending on where you're sailing. every week I will see at least 20-30 "upper body Flashes" and about 10-15% of them some "Downstair" looks... if I like it or not(And tbh in the start it was exciting, but now I'm growing tired of it, but the guests want this kind of events, so we give it to them.)
The closer to the US, the less they will wear/the more clothes they will throw off.

Anyways, my end goal: To own and operate a chain of high-end luxury hotel/holiday resorts, that focus heavily on providing the world's best entertainment.

But first I'll need the experience as a manager. (In this case: Cruise director)
I've been entertainment manager in holiday resorts(Among the top 20 of the world) and high-end hotels(top 23 hotel of the world was my best one). just cruise lines are missing and then I've done them all.
and to be honest; Hotels, event companies and holiday resorts are just a joke in compared to the entertainment quality that you can find at cruise lines.
(In fact: Cruise lines have the highest entertainment quality worldwide.)

Just to show how well respected my jobs or my managers jobs are in the entertainment field: Many cruise directors will be invited to become hosts in Vegas, Hollywood, or popular television series/movies/events.
For example; One of my old bosses got recruited for one of the biggest casino's in Vegas as a host, another one was hosting the MTV Music awards until she decided to become a backstage worker at movies, now she does the costumes/make up for high-end movies(She worked with many A-list actors). another one went to play in television series. game show hosts, movie stars etc.
They come to us since they know that we're better than anyone else if it comes to entertainment/guest services/management of a large company.
 

theag

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Cruise lines have the highest entertainment quality worldwide
Well, I guess there are high quality cruises and then there are cruises where you stick keychains in your a$$. To each his own.

41aa245e4c0f5336a46d783a8922dced0a5eac66a3b39d6b2321bbcdee5b599c.jpg
 

Durete

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Lol, theagg, we should let the guests do that as example, somehow in this team it slipt in to do it to each other...which is indeed f*cked up.

But as for high quality entertainment, numbers don't lie.
This is a multi billion business, with well in the trillions if you include all sister companies.
Also the worldwide ratings don't lie, which puts this company for the last few years WAY above any of the competition.

People come mainly to this company for:
#1 Entertainment
#2 Service
#3 Destinations

And pay well into the xx.xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx to do so.
 
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theag

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Lol, theagg, we should let the guests do that as example, somehow in this team it slipt in to do it to each other...which is indeed f*cked up.

But as for high quality entertainment, numbers don't lie.
This is a multi billion business, with well in the trillions if you include all sister companies.
Also the worldwide ratings don't lie, which puts this company for the last few years WAY above any of the competition.

People come mainly to this company for:
#1 Entertainment
#2 Service
#3 Destinations

And pay well into the xx.xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx to do so.
I'm not arguing that cruises are big business. I just doubt that the keychain-in-a$$-cruise niche is big :).
 

Aimee

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The keychain-in-a$$-cruise niche is surprisingly big, I'd imagine. :p I don't see why everyone finds it so strange. Cruises are filled with tacky entertainment, nobody really bats an eyelid at this stuff at the time.

But seriously, the title of this thread irritates me whenever I look at it, and I got lost after reading the second paragraph...it reminds me of something I'd read on Yahoo Answers. Perhaps just be more careful what you say in the future?
 

randomnumber314

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The keychain-in-a$$-cruise niche is surprisingly big, I'd imagine. :p I don't see why everyone finds it so strange. Cruises are filled with tacky entertainment, nobody really bats an eyelid at this stuff at the time.

But seriously, the title of this thread irritates me whenever I look at it, and I got lost after reading the second paragraph...it reminds me of something I'd read on Yahoo Answers. Perhaps just be more careful what you say in the future?

How dare you come in here with level headed advice.

I think MJ hit this on the head; people on cruises start drinking a like 8 am, of course they're "entertained" by keychains in the a$$, they're lit up.
 
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Unknown

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Your job sounds absolutely horrible to me, but to each his own. Good luck on your journey.
 

The-J

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You lost me at keychain in the a$$.

Get another job or don't get involved with the drama. Easier said than done, I know, but you may find it's worth it
 

Zachariah Lange

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Why isn't the company being accused of sexual harassment? Did the cruise line come up with the game, or is it your brainchild? If the company did, I would tell the manager straight up that if they don't want the girls to feel sexually harassed then don't make you demonstrate sexually oriented games with the female employees. You are just doing your job, if that leads to you being accused of sexual harassment, then there is something wrong there.
 
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Bila

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the title of this thread irritates me whenever I look at it,

You are not the only one irritated by the title ....Guess what ?? each woman is different, there is the nice one and the not so nice one, the intelligent one and the not so intelligent, the funny one and the not so funny .....you get the point ....I think that YOU have a problem with women, and the first symptom of that is having this (negative) generalized ideas about women.
your description of girls so far was : manipulative and mean.
Good luck anyway
 

H. Palmer

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Hello fellow people.

Durete, it's hard to judge what was exactly going on there because this is a case of "she said this" and "I did that" and in those situations 80 percent of relevant information is left out automatically, because much of it has to do with the way it was said, the timing, the details, etc.

My gut feeling says you are operating from the assumption that women and men are similar creatures, which is probably at the heart of what is going wrong here.

Equal before the law does not mean that the sexes are the same or even similar.

With regard to the situation, what can be appropriate for a man is sometimes totally inappropriate for a woman. Hence "sexual harassment".

In other words, don't expect them to do what you would do without hesitation.

If you want good relationships with women colleagues, sometimes giving them compliments for their appearance from time to time is enough to get along fine.
 

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