The Entrepreneur Forum | Financial Freedom | Starting a Business | Motivation | Money | Success

Welcome to the only entrepreneur forum dedicated to building life-changing wealth.

Build a Fastlane business. Earn real financial freedom. Join free.

Join over 80,000 entrepreneurs who have rejected the paradigm of mediocrity and said "NO!" to underpaid jobs, ascetic frugality, and suffocating savings rituals— learn how to build a Fastlane business that pays both freedom and lifestyle affluence.

Free registration at the forum removes this block.

Decreasing Belief

Kyle Tully

Silver Contributor
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
362%
Jul 13, 2014
223
808
43
Sydney, Australia
You should fail at business a couple times. Start a business, have it fail. (Usually your first business fails due to not having a paying customer)

Start another one, make some money, have it fail. (This failure will be more interesting. Maybe you couldn't meet demand. Maybe you got priced out of the game by a competitor. Maybe your margins shrunk too bad. Maybe you got too burned out.)

Start another one, make more or less money, have it fail. (This business will probably not fail for the same reason as your last one.)

This is pretty much exactly how it worked for me.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

SteveO

Legendary Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
456%
Jul 24, 2007
4,228
19,294
I feel the best proof is that their are SEVERAL Millionaires who have lost all their money, then BECAME MILLIONAIRES AGAIN.

That is me. I made about 10M over a few year period and then lost to the point of negative net worth. I am back to over a million and rising. The good part about this is that all fear has been lost with the process.
 

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
:) That's nice to hear.
My emotions are waving probably because of my depressed mother.
She is so negative about everything. "I'm old" (40yo)
I try to motivate her then all my mom is saying: You are in an easy place! You are only 15! I'm a teacher, how am I supposed to start a business?
Believe me son, you are not in my place I will never get rich, you can't understand my situation.
Well I live with her only, she's divorced 3 years ago and she just can't move forward in life, which I understand. It must be hard to forget a 25 years old relationship. My father really messed up everything in her life, my dad's "girlfriend.." plz whore (sorry sorry for swearing but she really is) was pregnant when we were in a holiday with him. It's a really long and dirty story so if you don't mind I don't write it down.
It's really hard to live a positive life when you can't motivate your depressed mother who you live with.
 

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
:) That's nice to hear.
My emotions are waving probably because of my depressed mother.
She is so negative about everything. "I'm old" (40yo)
I try to motivate her then all my mom is saying: You are in an easy place! You are only 15! I'm a teacher, how am I supposed to start a business?
Believe me son, you are not in my place I will never get rich, you can't understand my situation.
Well I live with her only, she's divorced 3 years ago and she just can't move forward in life, which I understand. It must be hard to forget a 25 years old relationship. My father really messed up everything in her life, my dad's "girlfriend.." plz whore (sorry sorry for swearing but she really is) was pregnant when we were in a holiday with him. It's a really long and dirty story so if you don't mind I don't write it down.
It's really hard to live a positive life when you can't motivate your depressed mother who you live with.
Started meditating with her. My plan is to mediate 1-2 on a daily basis.
To balance her hormone system we'll also do running and yoga. I hope I can save her.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Rcaraway1989

Rob C
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
469%
Mar 16, 2011
138
647
34
Austin, TX
Started meditating with her. My plan is to mediate 1-2 on a daily basis.
To balance her hormone system we'll also do running and yoga. I hope I can save her.

Does your mom have health insurance or live with free health care? She needs a therapist. I know because your situation is very similar to my parents (divorced from bad father, my mom for years thought she was worthless). Seriously. Therapy. There's zero shame in it.
 

The-J

Dog Dad
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
264%
Aug 28, 2011
4,199
11,079
Ontario
It's really hard to live a positive life when you can't motivate your depressed mother who you live with.

Your mother needs a professional. Help her out in whatever way you can, but remember your needs first! You're not a therapist, you're a teenager who is still in school. Try to encourage her to see a psychologist.

Think of it this way: if you are able to achieve something while you are living there, your mother will definitely be proud of you and being around your unwavering positivity will help her see the world differently.
 

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
Thanks guys, but she went to a psychologist and a psychiater too (not sure if it's this way how it's called in English, it's basically a psychologist who also gives you pills). She went to both and NOTHING changed. She needs a GOOD psychoTHERAPIST. Pills really won't change anything, that's bullshit, it only makes her addicted. Do some research, the best way to cure depression is not the "PILL" way.

Her life goal was to be be a great mother of a family, but my dad completely crushed her family, her dreams.

BTW The main problem is that my father lives like 600m away, and he still wants to come back. I honestly don't understand my mother because she is saying stuff like this: "You now, I don't want to live with your father again but as I see it, I will never find anyone again in my life, every good man is with his family"
Some guys were "dating" her but there were guys who wanted to get a BJ on the first date. How wouldn't she be disappointed about men?
So she was also thinking about "rebuilding" the relationship with my father, but com'on even she knows that it's impossible.
The kid of my father will always be there, it will never be the same again. She will never find true happiness until she breaks off every connection between her and my father.

I need to get the money ASAP then emigrate from the country. That's one of my new motivators.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Jam Wheel

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
130%
Jul 14, 2014
77
100
UK/US/SE
Thanks guys, but she went to a psychologist and a psychiater too (not sure if it's this way how it's called in English, it's basically a psychologist who also gives you pills). She went to both and NOTHING changed. She needs a GOOD psychoTHERAPIST. Pills really won't change anything, that's bullshit, it only makes her addicted. Do some research, the best way to cure depression is not the "PILL" way.

Her life goal was to be be a great mother of a family, but my dad completely crushed her family, her dreams.

BTW The main problem is that my father lives like 600m away, and he still wants to come back. I honestly don't understand my mother because she is saying stuff like this: "You now, I don't want to live with your father again but as I see it, I will never find anyone again in my life, every good man is with his family"
Some guys were "dating" her but there were guys who wanted to get a BJ on the first date. How wouldn't she be disappointed about men?
So she was also thinking about "rebuilding" the relationship with my father, but com'on even she knows that it's impossible.
The kid of my father will always be there, it will never be the same again. She will never find true happiness until she breaks off every connection between her and my father.

I need to get the money ASAP then emigrate from the country. That's one of my new motivators.

There is a lot happening in this situation and her mind/life that you cannot change. The best you can do is offer support, determine the line you are willing to draw in the sand for allowing your mental space to be taken up by her problems, and learn to let go.

You are really young for your mom to be putting this sort of emotional pressure on you, and I am sure you want to be a good person and help out someone who is in pain/suffering. However, you cannot fix someone who isn't ready to change and you could very well get sucked into her dysfunction along the way. Resist that by compartmentalizing what you are willing to give.

Right now we are living with a very good and dear friend of mine while we are working to get reestablished in a new country. She also has depressive issues and moans about everything - men, her weight, work, how stupid she is, etc. Its not a good headspace. She is also a pack rat and obsessive shopper (talk about sidewalker!) who thinks that because something isn't instantaneous it won't ever work (be that savings, a budget, investments, any sort of commitment, etc). For the years I have known her it was a good girly laugh to have but after living here and trying to prop her up and help dig her out of her depressive hole, I've learned I can't. She was just an emotional vampire sucking away at my mental capacity to handle the rigors of a job search and get my own entrepreneurial work done. I had given too much emotional space to her initally and all it did was drag me down to her level where I couldn't do anything but sit on the couch.... or essentially what she does. Took 6 weeks away and cleared that right up, but now I have set limits - won't let her wallow in her depressive talk with me, go on and live my life, will offer an ear but not dwell on the issue. She knows the problems she needs to solve, but thats her life, not mine, SHE needs to solve them, same as your mom. You can't do it for her, no matter how much you think you can or want to do so.

Get out, get away, find others of like mind to spend time with. Good luck.
 

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
There is a lot happening in this situation and her mind/life that you cannot change. The best you can do is offer support, determine the line you are willing to draw in the sand for allowing your mental space to be taken up by her problems, and learn to let go.

You are really young for your mom to be putting this sort of emotional pressure on you, and I am sure you want to be a good person and help out someone who is in pain/suffering. However, you cannot fix someone who isn't ready to change and you could very well get sucked into her dysfunction along the way. Resist that by compartmentalizing what you are willing to give.

Right now we are living with a very good and dear friend of mine while we are working to get reestablished in a new country. She also has depressive issues and moans about everything - men, her weight, work, how stupid she is, etc. Its not a good headspace. She is also a pack rat and obsessive shopper (talk about sidewalker!) who thinks that because something isn't instantaneous it won't ever work (be that savings, a budget, investments, any sort of commitment, etc). For the years I have known her it was a good girly laugh to have but after living here and trying to prop her up and help dig her out of her depressive hole, I've learned I can't. She was just an emotional vampire sucking away at my mental capacity to handle the rigors of a job search and get my own entrepreneurial work done. I had given too much emotional space to her initally and all it did was drag me down to her level where I couldn't do anything but sit on the couch.... or essentially what she does. Took 6 weeks away and cleared that right up, but now I have set limits - won't let her wallow in her depressive talk with me, go on and live my life, will offer an ear but not dwell on the issue. She knows the problems she needs to solve, but thats her life, not mine, SHE needs to solve them, same as your mom. You can't do it for her, no matter how much you think you can or want to do so.

Get out, get away, find others of like mind to spend time with. Good luck.
Ehmmm, yea you might be right, but I find it sad that it's not her fault what she became to be.
You might say that my mother is ugly or rude to my father etc etc and that's why he cheated on her but that's not the case.
You don't know the story. The problem is not the divorce, only the pity way my father did it.
 

SteveO

Legendary Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
456%
Jul 24, 2007
4,228
19,294
It would do you well to move past all the mother/father issues. I know this has been tough on you. The past is not going to change. You need to focus on the present and let the other stuff go.
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

FastlaneTiger

Bronze Contributor
Read Fastlane!
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
52%
Jun 27, 2014
193
100
Not the USA
It would do you well to move past all the mother/father issues. I know this has been tough on you. The past is not going to change. You need to focus on the present and let the other stuff go.
YEP! LET'S KICK a$$!
Today is probably the best day in my entrepreneur learning life. So much motivation :) So much knowledge
 

jon.a

Legendary Contributor
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Read Fastlane!
Read Unscripted!
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
329%
Sep 29, 2012
4,306
14,175
Near San Diego
It would do you well to move past all the mother/father issues. I know this has been tough on you. The past is not going to change. You need to focus on the present and let the other stuff go.
I second this. Help your mother, but don't let her drag you into her despair.
 

SteveO

Legendary Contributor
FASTLANE INSIDER
EPIC CONTRIBUTOR
Summit Attendee
Speedway Pass
User Power
Value/Post Ratio
456%
Jul 24, 2007
4,228
19,294
One other thing. You are not going to be able to change your mom or her thinking. That is just a distraction for you. Work on yourself!
 
Dislike ads? Remove them and support the forum: Subscribe to Fastlane Insiders.

Post New Topic

Please SEARCH before posting.
Please select the BEST category.

Post new topic

Guest post submissions offered HERE.

New Topics

Fastlane Insiders

View the forum AD FREE.
Private, unindexed content
Detailed process/execution threads
Ideas needing execution, more!

Join Fastlane Insiders.

Top